Thirty-Eight Reasons

by Len Webster

  The violins changed its song to the bridal march and she watched as her guests stood up from the chairs that circled around the gazebo. Her eyes planted on the man she would call her husband.

  As she walked closer to Noel, her eyes never left his. It was the moment that Jane from ‘27 dresses’ dreamed of. The way Noel looked at her like she was the only woman in the world. The way he held his breath at the sight of her made her smile. The way he looked at her confirmed that no one would love her the way Nolan Parker did.

  She couldn’t wipe away the smile on her face as she crossed the bridge with her father. Her bridesmaids and Noel’s groomsmen stood on the railings of the bridge. Passing Alex, she noticed his wink from the corner of her eye. Just before she got to the end of the bridge, Clara handed her bouquet to Stevie. When she reached the gazebo Noel stepped towards her. She turned to her father as he produced a proud smile.

  “Thank you, Daddy,” she whispered once he kissed her cheek and offered her hands to Noel’s.

  “You take care of my girl, now.”

  Noel didn’t take his eyes off of her. “For all my life, I will,” he promised.

  “You look beautiful.” Noel whispered for only her to hear as they looked at their celebrant.

  Noel took both her hands and faced her. Those green eyes pierced her heart and she couldn’t wait until it was proclaimed that she was his wife.

  Her eyes never left his as their celebrant began their wedding ceremony.

  “Nolan and Clara have decided to write their own vows. Nolan,” their male celebrant said.

  Noel breathed out and she smiled largely at him.

  “Clara, there is not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you. Today, in front of all our friends and family I take you to be my wife. I vow to eat every cupcake you make me, I vow to make you smile when all you want to do is cry and I vow for the rest of my days that I will love you without a fault and without a doubt. Falling in love with you was easy and being in love with you makes forever seem as if it’s not long enough. We’ve had our troubles and our journeys, but I thank God everyday that we found a way back to each other.

  “I was asked my reasons for loving you and I would need an endless supply of paper. Because every reason is purposeful and every reason is valid when it comes to my love for you. My life reason is you. You are what makes me valid and you are what makes me purposeful. I don’t need thirty-eight reasons. I just have one: my reason for loving is you. Clara Louise Lawrence, I will only ever need you in my life. You are my reason.”

  She sniffed at his words. Beautiful and honest. She promised herself she wouldn’t cry but his vows were perfect beyond words. Breathing in, it was time for her vows.

  “Nolan James Parker, you are the most infuriating man I have ever met, but you are also the greatest man too. Being in love, I found it to be unexpected and messy as well as completely and utterly liberating. And that sums us up. I’ve never been perfect, but with you we’re perfectly imperfect together. I have flaws and I have faults that you see past and still love me. All I ever wanted was a little bit of you and you gave me all and everything.

  “Your love makes me a better person. Your love makes me feel beautiful. And your love makes me feel loved. I fall in love with you more and more with every day, more so than the day before. I vow to always be madly in love with you. I vow to always be your friend and your soul mate. I vow to be the best wife I can be. I vow to give you the happily ever after that you deserve. And I vow that our love will be timeless and without a concept of any forms of limits, like a Celtic knot. I’ve known you all my life but it took standing at my doorstep to fall madly in love with you. In front of all the people I love, I promise to wake up to every sunrise with you for the rest of our days because I love you and I will never stop being in love with you, Nolan James Parker.”

  A tear ran down Noel’s face and he mouthed ‘I love you’ to her. The happiness that engulfed her completely fuelled her body. She squeezed his hands and reassured her that this was all she ever wanted.

  “Nolan James Parker, do you take Clara Louise Lawrence to be your lawfully wedded wife? Will you love her, comfort her, honour and respect her? Do you promise to share all life has to offer you both, the hopes and dreams you both have as well as your achievements and disappointments with her from this day onwards?”

  Noel didn’t blink as he said, “I do.”

  “And do you, Clara Louise Lawrence, take Nolan James Parker to be your lawfully wedded husband? Will you love him, comfort him, honour and respect him? Do you promise to share all life has to offer you both, the hopes and dreams you both have as well as your achievements and disappointments with him from this day onwards?”

  Her thumb gently ran along the back of his hands and without a single hint of hesitation, Clara said, “I do.”

  The relief that filled his eyes had her almost giggling. She let herself close her eyes and get consumed in this moment with him. They both just promised, in front of their witnesses, to love each other for all their days.

  When she opened her eyes, Alex handed Noel the ring.

  “With this ring I marry you, Clara, and offer a symbol of my everlasting love for the rest of our days.” His thumb stroked her ring finger before he slid the wedding band on her finger. The burst of her heart had her almost breathless.

  Turning, she took Noel’s ring from Stevie with a smile. “With this ring I marry you, Nolan, and offer a symbol of my everlasting love for the rest of our days.” She took his hand and placed his wedding ring on his finger. The sight of it made the tears brim her eyes. Noel was finally and legally hers.

  Looking at their hands she loved the sight of their wedding rings.

  “Friends and family, Nolan and Clara have declared before you all that they will live together in marriage, they have symbolised their everlasting love by joining hands, taking vows and exchanging rings. I therefore, declare Nolan James Parker and Clara Louise Parker to be husband and wife.”

  I’m now Clara Louise Parker, wife to Nolan James Parker.

  The thought made her breathless and she saw Noel hold his breath too as he waited for the words he had been eagerly waiting for.

  “Nolan James Parker, you may now kiss your bride,” the celebrant said with much happiness in his voice.

  “Finally,” Noel breathed out.

  She couldn’t contain her smile as he brought her into his arms.

  “I love you, Mrs. Parker,” he whispered with so much love before his lips found hers, their first kiss as man and wife. It was perfect. His lips causing another burst of her heart and she smiled as she heard the increase of hollers, claps and cheers.

  The moment their first kiss ended, she placed her hand on his cheek and gently stroke it. “And I love you, Mr. Parker, simply forever.”

  EPILOGUE

  My wife.

  Noel stared at the woman he just married as she gave their flower girl a kiss on the cheek. She was breathtakingly beautiful and she was his. Clara Louise Lawrence was now Clara Louise Parker, his wife. She looked his way and a smile slowly touched her lips. The love and happiness in her eyes caused his heart to skip a beat. She brushed her brown curl out of her face and she slowly walked towards him. He held his breath as she took each step to him, just like when she walked down the aisle. Noel didn’t take his eyes off her.

  I love my wife.

  His heart throbbed, agreeing with his thoughts. He was madly in love with the woman that stopped in front of him and placed her hands on his hips. His hands cupped her face as he stared into those brown eyes of hers. The same pair that looked back at him when she opened her door to find him on her doorstep, the first time they met again.

  “Thank you,” he said, brushing his thumb across the faint mole on her cheek.

  She tilted her head and asked, “For?”

  Noel smiled and placed a chaste kiss on her lips. “For letting me love you,” he said.

  Then he placed another. “For letting me marry you.
”

  Then another. “For letting me have a life with you.”

  And another. Clara smiled against his lips and he pulled back. He brushed her loose curls back and smiled at her. Everything he ever wanted and would ever want was in his hands and she wore his ring and had his name.

  Her eyes never left his as her fingers squeezed the side of his waist. He ignored their names being called by the photographer and brushed the pad of his thumb along the bottom of her lip.

  “For finding your way back to me.” This time he kissed her forehead. “And finally…”

  He pulled back and placed his hands on hers, pulling them off his body. Noel clutched her left hand and his fingers grazed over her wedding band. His heart throbbed, sending warmth throughout his body. He let go of her left and held her right. His fingers rested on the Celtic knot engagement ring and he smiled, remembering the first time he placed it on her finger.

  Noel’s thumb and index finger pulled off the engagement ring and he took hold of her left hand in his right. His eyes met hers and the smile she gave him was one he looked forward to seeing for the rest of his life.

  “For loving me,” Noel said as he slid the engagement ring on her finger, resting above her wedding band.

  Clara pulled her hands away from his and placed them on the back of his neck, bringing his mouth closer to hers. Just shy off contact, Clara stopped and said, “Thank you for loving me the way you do. For believing in me and for us. Thank you for us, Noel.”

  “Thirty-eight,” he whispered, looking down at her. Noel placed his hands on her hips, loving the feel of her wedding dress beneath his fingers.

  “Thirty-eight. You said that in your vows,” his wife said as her hands moved to his shoulders.

  “When we first ended, we were apart for thirty-eight days. And everyday for thirty-eight days, I wrote a reason why I love you,” he revealed and Clara’s lips slowly parted.

  “You wrote me thirty-eight reasons,” she said softly.

  He nodded. “The only reason that matters is that you, Clara Louise Parker, are my reason for loving. Those reasons are all about you. I love all of you. You are my life reason.”

  “And you, Nolan James Parker, make me valid and purposeful,” Clara said, reciting his vows.

  She removed her hands from his shoulders and Noel reached inside his jacket pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper, handing it to his wife.

  “I love you for more than just these thirty-eight reasons. I have a lifetime of reasons for loving you. And I can’t wait until the day I get to say to you that one of my reasons for loving you is that you’re the mother of my child.”

  She blinked before her hands cupped his face and said, “That will be my favourite reason for you loving me. I love you, Noel. Simply forever.”

  I love my wife for wanting to have my child. I love my wife for wanting a life with me. I am in love with my wife, for more than thirty-eight days and more than thirty-eight reasons.

  No amount of white sand or distance can bury their past.

  Some things are just never meant to be forgotten.

  WHAT YOU LEFT BEHIND

  Everyone has a story.

  But not everyone has a past quite like

  Stevie Appleton and Julian Moors.

  Coming soon.

  April, 2015.

  WHAT YOU LEFT BEHIND: SNEAK PEEK

  Four Years Ago

  Stevie reached over to her bag until she found her copy of To Kill a Mockingbird that her father gave to her when she was ten. The cover was ruined by creases and spill marks, but that’s what she loved about this book. It lasted through the years. Flipping through the pages until she landed on the page marked by a gift tag that came with the book. She smoothed out the page and continued to read.

  “Tell me you’re a local and that you do this everyday when you come to the beach.”

  She heard a smooth voice say. Resting the book in her lap, Stevie turned to see pale blue eyes staring at the pages of her book. At first she was startled by his closeness as he peered over her shoulder. She felt a cold drop of seawater hit her exposed shoulder and she felt herself shiver.

  “Excuse me?” she asked.

  The stranger sat on the sand next to her. “You’ve got to be a local. There is no way a tourist comes to Phuket to read Harper Lee’s classic.”

  Stevie blinked as he took the book from her lap as his wet fingers moistened the pages. He flipped through the pages and stopped and ran his finger along the page.

  “Until I feared I would lose it, I never loved to read. One does not love breathing,” he quoted.

  Her jaw dropped. He had quoted one of her favourite lines from the book. He smiled and closed the book, handing it to her. Stevie blinked a few times before she took the book back and placed it in her lap.

  “I like your choice in classics. I think we’ll be good friends.”

  He gave her a genuine smile, but she couldn’t look away from those eyes.

  “What’s your name?” he asked.

  Her throat felt dry as she struggled to speak.

  “Blondie, what’s your name?” he asked again.

  His nickname for her snapped her out of her thoughts. “It’s not Blondie, that’s for sure. And I’m not here to make friends.”

  Damn those eyes. I need to get out of here. I can hide out near the pool. Yeah, I’ll do that.

  Stevie leaned forward and grabbed her beach bag. Those eyes and that smile had her alarm bells ringing. And she was sure he was Australian. His accent wasn’t strong, but she knew he couldn’t be from up north.

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa, Blondie. Need to be somewhere?” he asked as he placed his hand on her arm, stopping her.

  Stevie looked down at his hand and then up at him, his eyebrow raised as he looked at her.

  “It’s not Blondie. Okay,” Stevie said as she relaxed her body.

  “Come on, I’ve got to know the girl behind the mockingbird. You intrigue me,” he said as he released her arm and she sat back.

  Stevie turned to see him still staring at her and she sighed out. “You aren’t going to leave me alone, are you?” she asked, already knowing the answer.

  He pulled a boyish grin that disarmed her immediately.

  “Julian,” he said as he sat forward and held out his hand.

  Stevie looked at it hesitantly and tensed.

  “Here’s what we’ll do Blondie. We’ll be one of those types of friends, the holiday kind. No last names, no pasts or where we come from. We’ll just hang out on this beach, what do you say?”

  His eyes seemed so open and friendly, but Stevie had to be cautious. If they were just going to be friends then he wouldn’t have to know about her. This beach would be all they had and then they’d leave it behind and let it wash away with the water.

  He doesn’t have to know who I really am. He’ll never look for me. He wouldn’t need a reason to.

  “Stephanie.”

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  As always, I’d like to thank my ever-so-loving family for their unconditional love and support. You can’t pick your family but I am so glad we got stuck with each other.

  Thank you to my friends for having to deal with my constant complaining over my workload… you know who you all are and I’m sorry!

  My favourite authors in the world, Jaycee Ford and Alex Rosa. Thank you for being by my side and for listening to every concern I’ve had. I couldn’t have done any of this without you both.

  I can never thank Najla Qamber from Najla Qamber Designs enough for the amazing cover for this book. You are a privilege to work with and I am so happy to have worked with you. Don’t think our working relationship is done just yet. I’m writing books just for you to make me covers!

  My beta readers, Danielle Woodside and Michal Sue Walker. Every failed attempt at writing you’ve read first. Thank you for reading the very worst of my work. You both deserve a gazillion pardons from the universe.

  Thank you to two of the most amazing
bloggers out there, Jessica Adkins-Charles and Laura Joanne White. Not only have you supported my writing you also gave me a friendship that I’ll treasure more.

  My Lenatics, you have rallied into the hundreds. When the group started I wanted twelve members now look at us! We are mighty! Thank you for supporting me when you could have supported someone more deserving of your love!

  My readers, I am what I am because of you. Thank you for putting up with my bachelor to get this book. I have never felt more privileged in my life than when I get your messages. Thank you so much for being part of the journey.

  Remember, if anything, love is never easy.

  xoxo

  P.S. Thank you for trusting me with Noel and Clara’s story.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  The truth is, Len Webster is a romance-loving Melburnian with dreams of finding her version of ‘The One’. She calls Australia home, but secretly wishes a man with a beautiful accent would whisk her away. She’s been called a hopeless romantic and a firm believer of happily ever afters, which she doesn’t object to.

  When Len isn’t acting as the voice of her characters, you can find her drowning in business textbooks as she slaves over her Bachelor degree. She spends more time than she should daydreaming of her next Europe adventure or swooning over Mr. Darcy.

  Len can be found sitting at her University library, earphones in, and writing instead of studying. If she could, she would own a cupcake bakery just for an endless supply of red velvet cupcakes. Her best friends are a hot cup of tea, a warm jumper and her Macbook, ready to write to her heart’s content.