Keeping Up Appearances

by Elizabeth Stevens

  He passed me a controller and spent a few minutes going over the play functions. I nodded, taking it all in as best I could and trying to remember it. It was a lot easier than I expected. So about half an hour later Xander was sitting staring at the leader board where I was sitting higher than him.

  He blinked in disbelief.

  “Don’t worry if you’re not very good to start with…” I said, trying and failing to keep a straight face.

  “You think you’re so good?” Xander broke into a grin and pushed me over playfully.

  “I think the leader board thinks I’m so good,” I chortled, smiling up at him.

  “You couldn’t even let me win out of the goodness of your heart?”

  I was still laughing. “I had no idea what I was doing! I’m pretty sure I was just mashing the keypad.”

  He shook his head, our noses almost brushing. “Seriously? Doll, that’s even worse!”

  “If it makes you feel better, I might have played something similar with my brother. But, it was on the Playstation…”

  “Oh, something similar?” He beamed.

  I winced. “Only vaguely similar… I mash the keypad with him, too.”

  “Do you beat him?”

  I wrinkled my nose. “Sometimes.”

  “Spare a guy his dignity,” he laughed.

  “I’m not sure you had any to begin with,” I snorted.

  He cried out only mockingly indignant and tickled me. Both of us were laughing hard until our eyes met.

  Slowly, our laughter died on our lips and suddenly the situation was terribly serious and rather tense. It was a good kind of tense, a skin tingling and a heart fluttering in anticipation kind of tense, but it was still tense. I shouldn’t have let us get that kind of tense. But now I was here, I had zero motivation to slam us into reverse.

  How about that he’s a playboy wanker? my brain tried to remind me and my heart just wandered around with its fingers in its ears.

  “Holly…” he breathed, leaning towards me slowly.

  “Otherwise…” I said, equally breathlessly and not sure if I regretted it immediately or whether I just hated it felt like it took him so long to respond.

  Heat flashed through his eyes, but he lowered himself down slowly as though giving me plenty of out time. On one hand I appreciated it, on the other…

  I reached up and pulled his face the rest of the way to mine. I felt him smile against my lips for the briefest moment, then his tongue was in my mouth and I was just kind of focussed on that warm, brain-melt he gave me.

  I felt his hand on my side, then it trailed over my hip, down the outside of my leg. When he changed direction, his hand slid up the inside of my leg. He moved it slowly, exploring. I kissed him harder and slid my fingers into his hair. As his hand reached my hip again, his fingers ran over the inside of it and his thumb just skimmed between my legs, sending a shockwave of tingles through me–

  Then the doorbell rang and he paused.

  He pulled away and leant his forehead to mine, his eyes still closed.

  “Thanks, man,” he muttered to himself as he brushed his nose against mine, then pushed away to standing with a deep breath.

  I lay for a second, my brain rushing through all the potential situations that could have played out had that doorbell not rung.

  “I’ll be back in a tick.”

  I sat up at his tone. It was something like regret, mixed with annoyance, but also resignation. He gave me a short smile as he grabbed a t-shirt, his eyes still full of that heat, and headed out to let Greg in while my heart totally didn’t traipse down What If Lane and seriously regretted that t-shirt.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Greg gave me a knowing smile as he paused in the doorway to leave after a few hours of actually surprisingly successful poetry study. There’d been a bunch of jokes and laughing and Greg teasing Xander with me, but the boys both seemed more confident for the test than before we’d started.

  “Yes, I’m taking her out. Happy?” Xander sighed.

  Greg shot me a wink as though riling Xander up was doing me a favour. “Nah, man. Don’t on my account. Just would have thought the two of you would’ve jumped at the chance to go out like a normal couple now everyone knows.”

  “We made plans, man.” Xander was giving him very serious ‘get out’ vibes and I could barely supress a smile.

  Greg looked like he wasn’t believing a word Xander said. “Do these plans involve more than going to get a burger, going to a party, and/or driving around?”

  “Yes,” Xander huffed.

  “Because nothing you’ve ever been involved in – that could even remotely be classified as a date – included anything else.”

  “I’m taking her to a movie.”

  “What movie?” Greg folded his arms over his chest.

  “The new Guardians,” Xander said, unhesitatingly.

  “And, Holly wants to see the new Guardians?” Greg raised his eyebrows at me like he very much doubted this. But, I could cover well enough.

  “Actually, I’m a big fan.” Although if this meant I’d have to go to the movie with Xander, I was going to rip him a new one. If I did, I’d take him to Alien: Covenant when it was out as payback.

  “Really? Comic books?” Greg asked, dubiously.

  “Judgey much?” Xander huffed.

  Greg shrugged. “I’ve just never heard her talk about it. Who’s your favourite?”

  “Well I’m a Vibe girl, and – total cliché, I know – I quite like Ironman.”

  “Crossing universes?” he said as though he was a little in awe of my audacity.

  “I believe in equal love.”

  He smirked. “If you’re such a big fan, what are their real names?”

  “Really, dude?” Xander asked.

  I shrugged. “Cisco Ramone’s or Tony Stark’s?”

  Greg’s eyes widened slightly. “How do you feel about cars?”

  I smiled, pretty sure I knew where he was going with that. “Haven’t seen Fate of the Furious yet and I’m looking forward to it, but I haven’t got my hopes up it’ll be any good. But I mean, the driving scenes are what you watch it for though, right?”

  “Saw?”

  “I actually think the story progression and character motivation is quite interesting. And I think it’s a complete misconception that they get gorier as they go.”

  Greg smiled slowly. “Damn, man. She’s a keeper.”

  “Yeah,” Xander huffed awkwardly. “I’ve noticed.”

  My chest tingled at the weird hint of sincerity in that comment.

  “Whelp,” Greg said, rubbing his hands together. “I look forward the traditional evidence on Monday. You two have–”

  “Wait. What traditional evidence?” I asked quickly.

  Greg grinned. “Xand’s infamous hicky,” he said as Xander answered, “Don’t worry about it.”

  I wasn’t sure if Greg was being serious or not. It didn’t help that he and Xander were sharing a wry smile.

  “Sorry, the what now?” I blurted.

  Xander snorted, no doubt knowing exactly what I’d think about him giving me a hicky. “Ruin the moment, why don’t you?” He looked at Greg.

  “Dude! I am quite frankly surprised we haven’t seen one yet. Either you’re losing your touch or…” Greg petered off, his eyes going wide.

  The guy looked like he’d discovered some huge secret. Maybe he’d realised we were bullshitting our way through this. Shit, he knew! I looked at Xander, who didn’t look terribly concerned. But, then Xander never really looked concerned about anything. In fact, I’d never–

  No, not the point.

  “Or what, Greg?” I asked slowly.

  Greg was smiling; he definitely thought he’d figured out a secret. My heart pounded and it wasn’t the kind I’d become used to around Xander. Not that it was supposed to around Xander… And really, it didn’t.

  “Or Xand really l
ikes you…” he said like that was supposed to mean something to me.

  It obviously meant something to Xander the way the boys both looked at each other. I thought Greg would be teasing and condescending, but he looked genuinely happy and I saw a message I didn’t understand on his face. Xander did seem to understand it, though. But whether he was happy about it or not, I couldn’t tell.

  “Well, I mean… We are dating…” I said lamely.

  Greg threw me a smirk. “You certainly are. I just never thought I’d see the day when Xand liked and respected a girl enough to wait around for her. Power to you, Doll. Glad someone’s keeping him honest.”

  He held his fist out and I bumped it uncertainly with mine.

  “Okay!” Xander cried, grabbing the winking Greg and pushing him out of the house. “I think that’s quite enough of that. You two can have your moment on Monday when she tells you all about our date.”

  “Bye, Doll!” Greg said as Xander closed the door on him. “Rand and I want all the details Monday!” he yelled through the door.

  When Xander turned back to me, my glare was waiting for him.

  “What?” he asked with a shrug and a barely supressed smile.

  “Really? Now we’re going to need to go on a proper date,” I accused.

  He gave me a lop-sided smirk. “Yes, we are.”

  “You could at least pretend not to be so happy about it.”

  “Would it help if I took my shirt off again?” He pouted.

  Yes. “No.” I hoped I was frowning as much as I was intending to be.

  Xander’s lip quirked into that lop-sided smirk again. “You sure?” he cajoled.

  I forced my face to remain annoyed, but I was pretty sure I wasn’t fooling anyone. “Very sure.”

  He shrugged, complete with hands in the air. “All right then. Your loss.”

  “I assure you, I’m not complaining.”

  He leant towards me and I was hit with whatever enticing body spray he used. “Your lips say no, but your eyes say yes.”

  He was just so… Argh!

  He looked good, he smelled good, there was an annoyingly appealing twinkle in his eyes, and that hint of mischievous laughter playing at his lips did wonders for his charm factor. And, the boy knew it. He knew it and he knew how to work it.

  But, it wasn’t going to work on me. I surely had more willpower than that.

  “Why do you have to be so…” I huffed.

  “So what? Charming? Are you ready to concede, Doll?” He waggled his eyebrows at me and even that was somehow charismatic.

  Almost. I tried to harden my glare. “No. Not charming. So… Ugh! What time is this movie, then?” I figured I’d give him one victory to take his mind off securing another.

  He gave me that split-second grin that lit up his face before whipping his phone out. I watched his fingers play over the screen nimbly as he talked. “Eager for the trademark Xander hicky?” he chuckled.

  Something weird twisted inside me and I wasn’t lying when I answered, “No. I can’t say I’m looking forward to being treated like a thousand girls before me.”

  He froze. The only thing that moved was his eyes to look up at me. He blinked heavily like he was surprised by something, or he’d just found out this whole time that everyone else saw in black and white. He lowered his phone slowly and looked at me properly.

  “Doll…”

  I shook my head. “Just pick a time, Xander.”

  I pulled my own phone out to do… Well, whatever it was I did on my phone to pass the time these days. But before I even had it unlocked, Xander was taking my hands in one of his and tilting my chin up to look at him.

  “There haven’t been a thousand girls, Holly…” he said softly. “And, as for the hickies…”

  I shook my head and pulled away from him. “I don’t really want to know.”

  “Holly…” he sighed. When I looked back at him, he was running his hand through his hair. “Do you know why JT and I are enemies?”

  I blinked as I realised I didn’t actually know the reason. I couldn’t remember what had started it. “No.”

  “Yeah,” he huffed, “me either. I just know we are. I hate the way he walks around thinking he’s better than anyone. I hate the way he has no time for anyone he can’t use. I hate the way he threw Tara away like–”

  “That never happened!” I said vehemently. “And, none of that is true!”

  Xander looked at me with a little scepticism in his eyes. There was no argument about how he knew Jason was all that and more. There was no indignation or puffed up bluster. He just looked at me like he was waiting for the lightbulb to go off.

  “What?” I asked.

  He gave me an adorable little shrug. “Nothing. Just, here I was thinking that the git had treated Tara like absolute shit and…”

  “He didn’t. Not like people say.” I breathed out quickly. “He could have done better, true. But, it certainly wasn’t that bad and it wasn’t all his fault.”

  Xander nodded. “Well if that story’s not entirely true, it makes you wonder what other rumours flying around our school aren’t entirely true either…”

  I frowned. “Everyone knows you’re a player, Xander. You make out with random girls in the hallway, over half the girls at our school have a story about you, and people see you at parties. I’ve seen you at parties.”

  He just nodded aggravatingly calmly. “Okay. Fair call. I’m the womanising arsehole we all know and love.”

  I didn’t like where the conversation was leading my brain. “Did you find out what time the movie was on?”

  He sighed like he was steeling himself. “If you could do absolutely anything in the world, what would be your ideal first date?”

  I looked at him sharply. “I beg your pardon?”

  “Personally, I’d want to talk. I’d want to do something together. Not sit in a darkened movie theatre, the only thing differentiating us from everyone else being that you might hold my hand.”

  “And what would the guy who’s never been on a date before do while he’s passing up the opportunity to cop a feel in the back row?” I asked.

  One side of his mouth quirked because he knew I was teasing him. “I don’t know. I’d hoped my girlfriend might have some pointers?”

  “Fake girlfriend.”

  “Sure.”

  I breathed in as I thought. “I don’t know. Maybe…bowling?” I hedged, saying the first thing that popped into my head.

  “You bowl a lot on first dates?”

  “I’ve never bowled on any date, actually,” I corrected him.

  “A first for both of us then.”

  I couldn’t help but smile at him. His blatant, cocky confidence had this infectious nature to it. I couldn’t help but be temporarily conned into believing that he was actually as amazing as he thought he was, that I could be that amazing with him, that we could be that amazing together.

  “You good to go in that?” he asked, pointing to my jeans and jumper.

  I nodded. “If you’ll deign to be seen with me like this.”

  He gave me a smile of such force that it nearly blew me away. “I’d be seen with you in your daggiest PJs, Doll, and be proud to call you mine.”

  Well then. My heart totally didn’t just sit down and eagerly await his next dashing compliment with a gigantic smile on its face. But, I think I played it cool enough.

  “Oh really? You think you’re worth my daggiest PJs?” I asked. “You’re worth my absolute comfiest, safest, personal, me-time clothing?”

  He cocked his head to the side. “Not yet,” was all he said with a slight tilt to his lips.

  Okay. Heart? You just scoot on back here now please…

  I was going to have to wrestle the damn thing away from him if he kept saying things like that. My brain was about to beat the little thing around the head with a rolled up magazine and haul it back where it belonged – namely, locked up safe
from falling for Xander’s (un)charming personality. Because I was not an idiot.

  I cleared my throat. “When did you want to go?”

  He looked at his phone. “Well, what if we go now? We can pop past Nordburger for dinner and still make it to the movie later?”

  “Sure. Why not?” I replied, thinking at least I wouldn’t have to come up with an excuse for Greg as to why we hadn’t gone to the movie after all.

  “Sweet. Let me change my shirt and we can go.”

  “You need to change?”

  He gasped sarcastically. “Only change twice today? Doll, I have a reputation to maintain!” he said as he grinned.

  I watched him jog up the stairs and breathed out, all humour at his joke unfelt. Butterflies took up residence in my chest and I had to force myself to breathe normally. I had the sudden mad urge to run away. Far away. I didn’t care where as long as the King of the Bows wasn’t there. But, I was stronger than that.

  I could do a date with King Douche. It wasn’t a big deal. It wasn’t going to be any different than hanging out at school… Only there was no one to keep up appearances for. What did you do on a non-date that you could then tell people about as though it was a date? Would Xander really hold my hand? Would he expect me to kiss him? And, what about this hicky thing? I was not at all interested in that…

  Okay, a tiny part of me was interested in that… But, I chastised it terribly.

  Two weeks ago I could have called or messaged Nancy and talked through my nerves or excitement or dread or whatever the feeling in the pit of my stomach was. I probably could have talked to Jason at a pinch. But, I had no one now.

  I’d shut myself away from my old group – none of them would want to hear about my misgivings for my first proper date with King Douche. And, the Bows were all ridiculously loyal to Xander – I couldn’t imagine even Greg or Miranda being on my side if I told them I was nervous. They’d just regale me with all Xander’s good points (not that he had any) and probably joke about hickies.