Katie's Journey to Love

by Jerry S. Eicher

  “That’s okay,” Katie said. “Some of us do work outside the community. But I can see where it might seem strange. Most of us do grow up and work on farms.”

  “Well, that’s wonderful—and you’re wonderful.” The lady smiled again.

  Katie placed the last item into a bag, took the customer’s money, rang it up, and asked, “Do you need help out?”

  “No, I’ll be fine. Thank you, dear.”

  Katie clutched the envelope in her dress pocket, allowing joy to sweep over her again. This might not be quite like the ways of her community, but she was so blessed she thought she might burst. Da Hah was choosing to bless her beyond words. Why He should do that was a mystery. Perhaps it was Mamm’s prayers prayed over all the past years, even when Mamm didn’t know what she was praying for. Da Hah was like that, anyway that’s what the preachers said often in their Sunday sermons. He often took a long time to answer the cries of His people, and He didn’t always give them what they asked for.

  Katie pulled herself out of her thoughts as Arlene rushed up. “Why didn’t you tell me about the money someone left you, Katie?” Arlene demanded. “How exciting—and you didn’t tell me! I had to hear it from Esther.”

  “That’s what I was going to tell you after lunch, but then you had a customer so I decided to wait until closing time,” Katie whispered. “Let’s keep this quiet and not talk about it here, okay?”

  Arlene glanced around. “There’s no one here right now. Will you show me the money? I’d like to see it for myself.”

  Katie retrieved the envelope and handed it to Arlene. Arlene didn’t just peek inside, she took all the money out.

  Katie hurriedly whispered, “Arlene, put it back! Someone’s going to see it.”

  “I’m counting it,” Arlene said, continuing to flip through the bills. “Five thousand dollars, Katie! Good gracious! Where did all that come from?”

  “I don’t know! The person who left it with Esther wouldn’t say. Now put it back in the envelope!” Then Katie grabbed the bills and stuffed them back into the envelope herself.

  “Let’s see,” Arlene said, keeping tabs with her fingers, “it could be those Mennonite friends of yours. But as far as I know, they don’t have this kind of money to throw around. How about your new daett? Would he give you that kind of money?”

  “He said he didn’t have it the other night,” Katie answered. “And why wouldn’t he just give it to me if he wanted to? He wouldn’t need the secrecy or want to make it anonymous.”

  Arlene nodded in agreement. “I suppose we’ll just have to chalk this generosity up to a mysterious friend. This is so wunderbah, Katie! What nice things are happening to you. And not that long ago…”

  Katie hung her head. Arlene meant no harm with her words, but they were true. Not that long ago she’d considered herself just the daughter of the weird widow Emma Raber. Only by the grace of Da Hah was that changing. She certainly wasn’t doing anything special—except trying to live as Da Hah wanted her to.

  Arlene seemed to have forgotten about the mysterious friend. “And from what you told me the other day, you’ll get to see a lot of Europe. Holland, maybe Switzerland, and Germany. What about France and Paris? Oh, Katie, I’m so excited for you!”

  “We’re not going to Paris, nor will we see that much of Europe,” Katie said quietly, watching as a customer came out of an aisle and headed her direction. “We’re going to see the places where the Amish forefathers lived.”

  “You have to have some fun too,” Arlene quickly whispered before returning to her register. The customer, an older man, was already unloading his items on the conveyer belt. Katie went over to bag the man’s purchases since no one was in her line.

  When the man had paid and left, Katie returned to her register. All afternoon both of them kept stealing glances toward each other and smiling at Katie’s good fortune.

  “Can you believe it?” Arlene occasionally whispered between customers. “I still can’t!”

  Katie could only smile and shake her head.

  A young lady approached with her cart overflowing, and Katie got to work. But even as she scanned the purchases she thought, Yah, it would be a long time before she would get over this latest miracle from Da Hah.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  That evening as Katie drove Sparky down the driveway, the barn door opened and Jesse stepped out. Sparky was lathered up around the harness straps from the fast trip home. Katie hadn’t intended to push him so hard, but he must have picked up on her excitement.

  “Driving in like a teenager, are we tonight?” Jesse said as he approached with a smile. “Did you catch young Ben on the road and have a race with him?”

  He’s teasing, Katie thought as she stepped down from the buggy. She turned to him with a wide smile. What a wunderbah daett he was! She’d planned to tell Mamm her news first, but since Jesse was here, what better chance would she have?

  As Jesse helped her unhitch. Katie cleared her throat. “I have some great news to share.”

  Jesse looked up. “So that’s why you’re home so fast? This news must be quite something.”

  Katie grinned and looked straight at him. “It is! It’s unbelievable! Today someone gifted me with enough money for the trip to Europe!”

  Jesse raised his eyebrows. “Now, that is news! Who was it?”

  “I don’t know,” Katie said as she shook her head. “Esther gave me the money at lunchtime. She said a woman she didn’t know came up to the deli and handed her an envelope. Esther said the woman told her to give it to me—that it was money to help pay for my trip to Europe. Esther asked who it was from, and the woman said the giver didn’t want to be known. And, Jesse, it’s quite a large amount! I still can hardly believe it.”

  “You must have some really gut friends among those Mennonites!” Jesse’s smile hadn’t dimmed a bit.

  “So I can go?” Katie asked as she finished unfastening the tug on her side.

  Jesse didn’t hesitate. “I said you could if you had the money.”

  “Here!” Katie walked over to him, reached inside her dress pocket, and handed Jesse the envelope.

  He flipped through the bills, counting as he went. “Looks like you’re going, all right,” he said, handing the envelope back.

  “You don’t disapprove?” Katie stood beside Sparky, anxiously awaiting his answer.

  Jesse had gone around to lead Sparky forward, so his face was hidden behind the horse’s neck. But his voice sounded cheerful enough. “If Da Hah goes to this much trouble to help you, then He must wish you over there for some reason. And I’m sure seeing the birthplace of our faith is a gut thing.”

  “Thank you,” Katie whispered as she held the buggy shafts up.

  “Katie, perhaps we should keep this quiet until after supper,” Jesse said as he led Sparky out of the shafts. “You can share it with your mamm, but let me tell the family after supper tonight. And then we’ll go from there. Okay?”

  Katie nodded.

  “I’ll take care of Sparky tonight,” Jesse said. “Just in case you want to go tell your mamm the news.” He gave her one last smile and then led the horse into the barn.

  Katie walked across the lawn and entered the house through the washroom door. Inside, the first thing she saw was Mabel’s angry face. Why was the girl already angry with her? Katie wondered. And when Mabel stepped toward her, Katie involuntarily took a step back. She caught her breath as Mabel stepped even closer.

  “Why was Daett helping you unhitch?” Mabel hissed.

  Katie glanced around before answering. “I thought we were going to get along better, remember? I didn’t tell him about Mose, if that’s what you’re worried about. And I’m still not planning to.”

  Mabel looked a little less angry and a little more relaxed. “So he still doesn’t know?”

  Katie shrugged. “Not from me anyway.”

  Mabel’s eyes narrowed. “You seem to make an awful lot of things your business around here. Why do y
ou have to make such a pest out of yourself?”

  Angry words pressed against Katie’s lips. It wasn’t her fault Mabel was hanging out with Mose when her daett disapproved. And it wasn’t her fault Jesse disliked Mose. Mabel just wanted to blame Mamm and her for it. And what of Mabel’s agreeing the other night to get along better?

  “At least you have the decency to keep your mouth shut,” Mabel snapped. “It’s nice you know your proper place in this household.”

  In the normal Amish way of authority and respect, Katie shouldn’t have to tolerate a younger girl speaking to her like this. But these weren’t normal times. She and Mamm had basically invaded Mabel’s life. Because of that, Katie wanted to treat Mabel with compassion. Still, Mabel was pushing even her limits.

  “So what were you talking about?” Mabel demanded, going back to her original question.

  “You’ll find out soon enough,” Katie answered. She knew if she didn’t share Mabel was only going to get angrier, but she wanted to respect and honor Jesse’s authority more than please Mabel.

  Mabel stepped closer. “If you think I’m going to stand around and let you steal my daett’s heart away from me, Katie Raber, then you have another guess coming.”

  Denial bubbled up inside Katie, but she choked it back.

  “You might as well go ahead and tell me your little secret,” Mabel continued. “If you don’t tell me, I’ll just ask Daett.”

  “He’s planning to tell everyone after supper,” Katie said. “You’ll just have to wait until then—or go talk to him now and see what he says.”

  Mabel’s eyes got big. “I don’t like this one bit. What are you up to, Katie Raber?”

  Katie walked to the sink and looked out the window.

  “Well, it can’t be much,” Mabel asserted, her face brightening. “Daett is probably trying to make things easier for you by giving you extra attention. He knows you’ve had a rough life, you know.”

  Mabel sure knew how to strike where it hurt, Katie thought. The pain stung deep inside her heart. She checked the quick tears that threatened to spring up. “Your daett’s a gut man, Mabel. You should be thankful for him.”

  Mabel smirked. “I know that. He’s way too gut for you. I don’t know why he was so willing to bring you and your mamm into our home. Pity would be my guess.”

  Katie turned and ran upstairs. She caught a glimpse of Mamm in the living room as she went by, but she didn’t even pause. Had Mamm heard their exchange in the kitchen and done nothing about it? Likely she had, but would she let Mabel’s accusation stand? But then what could Mamm really do? Rebuke Mabel? That would only make things worse for both of them.

  Katie threw herself on the bed and buried her face in her hands. The tears didn’t come though. It was like they were frozen inside her. Mabel’s last words had taken the joy right out of her. And she was right. Jesse was too gut a daett for her, just as Ben was too gut to be her boyfriend, and just as she didn’t deserve all the blessings Da Hah was bestowing on her. After all, she was still Emma Raber’s daughter deep down inside. Mabel could see that even if no one else did right now. Katie knew she couldn’t go back to that old life, even if she wanted to. That place was gone, and Mamm was sitting in the living room downstairs married to Jesse.

  Did Mabel have any idea what it was like to live the life she had lived—without a daett most of her growing-up years, ignored and unnoticed by everyone in the community, and having a mamm who was known as being strange? Katie sat up. Mabel would just have to deal with what was happening. No one could control everything in life. In fact, most people could control very little. And she wasn’t controlling what was happening at all—it was just happening. Da Hah was in charge, and she trusted Him in gut times and bad times, just like the preachers said on Sundays. And this was one of those gut times!

  Katie trembled with excitement. She had so much joy on the one side with Mamm, Jesse, Ben, and now this trip to Europe. On the other side was Mabel. What would Mabel say when Jesse told the family tonight? She was already angry, so this might make her explode with jealousy and bad temper.

  Katie swung her feet over and stood as the sound of footsteps came up the stairs and stopped by the door. A soft knock sounded. It had to be Mamm. Mabel would have stormed up the hallway in the mood she was in. And the other children seldom came to her door.

  “May I come in?” Mamm asked.

  “Yah,” Katie said, sitting down.

  Mamm came in and sat beside her on the bed. She studied Katie for a moment. “I hate it that we have to continue talking with each other in your bedroom, Katie. But I wanted to say how sorry I am for the things Mabel said to you. I know it’s not easy living with her.”

  Katie hung her head. “You’re not to blame, Mamm.”

  Mamm squeezed Katie’s arm. “You’ve been given a lot of blessings lately. Try to remember that. It wouldn’t be gut for anyone to have everything go well.”

  Katie met Mamm’s gaze, tears now in her eyes. “I know, but it’s hard.”

  Mamm gave her a long hug. “You know Mabel isn’t nice to me either.”

  Katie choked back a sob. “But you have Jesse to comfort you. I have to face Mabel on my own.”

  “You have Ben now.” Mamm held Katie at arm’s length. “Who would have thought that would happen?”

  Katie wiped her eyes. “I thought you didn’t approve of him, Mamm.”

  A smile flitted across Mamm’s face. “Nee, but I’m working on it. You know I don’t change my mind very fast. You should still be thankful for everything that’s happening, all the same.”

  Katie nodded. “Yah, I am thankful for Ben. But for Mabel?” Katie glanced at Mamm. “I’m trying, I really am. I understand that we’re disturbing her life.”

  “That’s why we must have lots of patience with the girl.” Mamm stood up. “Mabel’s going through a hard time right now. She really doesn’t want to sneak around with Mose the way she has to.”

  So Mamm did know all about Mose and Mabel and was choosing to not say anything. If Mabel knew that, surely she would be easier on Mamm.

  “Come,” Mamm said, “we’d better help Mabel fix supper.”

  Katie looked up, her eyes glowing. “Mamm, I have some exciting news!” The words spilled out. “I’m going to Europe! Today someone gave the money to Esther—to give to me.”

  “Someone gave you the money?” Mamm gasped.

  “Yah!” Katie allowed the joy to flow. “Isn’t that wunderbah?”

  Mamm didn’t look convinced.

  Katie took her arm. “It’s true, Mamm! Look!” Katie pulled the envelope out of her pocket and gave it to Mamm. “Open it!”

  Mamm fingered the envelope Katie handed her. Then she peered inside. “That’s a lot of money, Katie! Who gave it to you?”

  “The giver wanted to remain anonymous. Esther asked, but the woman just handed her the envelope, told her it was for Katie Raber’s trip to Europe, and left. Isn’t that amazing?”

  “Yes, it is! Oh my.”

  “Jesse helped me unhitch when I got home, so I told him about it. And he confirmed that I can go since Da Hah has provided the money!”

  Mamm met Katie’s excited look. “I’m so happy for you, Katie. Europe is a long ways away though…”

  “You’ll let me go, won’t you, Mamm?” Katie asked hesitantly.

  “Yes, of course. It sounds like a wonderful trip.” Mamm paused, obviously deep in thought. “I wonder what Mabel will say when she finds out. She may find this difficult—especially since she’s going through such a hard time right now.”

  “I don’t know either. Jesse said he would tell the family about my going to Europe after supper.”

  Mamm touched her arm and then gave her a hug. “Jesse will handle things the right way. We needn’t worry about that then.”

  Katie smiled. Jesse would, but there might still be an explosion tonight, if she didn’t miss her guess.

  “Now, we’d better get downstairs and get supper on.” They
both stood, and Mamm led the way out of the bedroom. They went downstairs, and when they walked into the kitchen Mabel didn’t look up. Neither did she speak to them while the three of them prepared supper. Mabel was still carrying around her thundercloud when the men came in from the barn. Carolyn had peeked into the kitchen moments earlier, but she’d probably felt the tension because she’d beaten a hasty retreat to the living room. Now that the men had arrived, she slipped into the kitchen and sat down at the table. Joel followed her cautiously.

  “Sit down, everyone! Supper’s ready.” Mamm was all smiles.

  Jesse smiled back at her, and Katie felt her neck grow warm. Mamm and Jesse acted like newlyweds, even if they were older than most. They have a right to a little mushiness, Katie figured, though their actions still made her squirm. Mamm is acting more love-struck than I do with Ben, Katie thought. But Mamm was also married to her love. That made all the difference in the world.

  Mabel shoved a bowl of mixed vegetables across the table before sitting down. It clanked against the potato dish and came close to tipping over.

  Jesse said nothing, but Leroy had no such inhibitions. “What’s gotten into you, Mabel? You look angry enough to eat a bear.”

  “Maybe I am!” Mabel snapped, not looking up.

  “Everybody calm down,” Jesse said. “Let’s have prayer.”

  Mabel got off another quick glare in Leroy’s direction before she bowed her head.

  Katie held her breath for a moment before taking a deep breath and closing her eyes. Yah, this was was going to be quite an evening.

  When Jesse said “Amen,” everyone lifted their heads. Leroy immediately grabbed the potato dish.

  Mabel reached out and slapped his hand. “Let the younger people go first tonight, Leroy! You don’t always have to hog everything.”

  Leroy’s face grew red. “Mind your manners, Mabel. You’re a mess. Are you on Mose withdrawal or what?”

  Mabel’s eyes blazed. “Wait until you love someone, Leroy. I’ll tell her everything bad I know about you.”