Ripped Pages

by M. Hollis

  “Yes, I’m ready.”

  Queen Laura made a gesture to the guard on the door who admitted another woman. She had dark skin, and fluffy white hair in a high bun, expensively tailored clothes, and her arms were full of official looking documents.

  “This is Abigail Ramos,” Laura said as the woman sat down. “She’s here to assist you and listen to your story.”

  Abigail gave her a small smile. She spread her papers all over the table and cleared her throat before saying, “Hello, Valentina. I’m aware of your delicate situation. As the King and Queen have probably already informed you, I’m here to take your testimony so that your father can be brought to justice. Is that all right? You can start whenever you are ready.”

  Val nodded and sat straighter in her chair. She took a few deep breaths, focusing on the wooden table before her. As soon as she was ready, she began to speak.

  “My name is Valentina Sampaio, and I’m the princess of Pouso Dourado. I have been imprisoned in a tower in the middle of a forest since I was eight years old. My father left me there with no resources, just sent me food twice a day. I broke out with the help of Princess Agnes who was passing by when I decided to escape. I’m here today to ask that my father pays for the way he’s treated me…”

  Val told them all the details of her years in the tower, from the first fights with her father to the moment she saw her chance of freedom when Agnes entered the scene.

  It was almost evening before Val was finished with her statement. The King and the Queen listened to everything with concern and compassion in their expressions.

  When Val was done, she looked up to see Abigail still writing. Val turned to the queen and Laura gave her a nod of encouragement.

  “I think we’ve covered everything,” said Abigail, briskly. “But we still need to know if you wish to return as queen when things are settled down, Your Highness.”

  Val thought for a moment. She knew what they wanted to hear, but she didn’t want to keep trying to please others, not when she knew what was the best decision. Then she decided to be honest. “I’m a fifteen-year-old girl. I have no idea how to rule a kingdom and have spent most of my life stuck in a tower. I’m sure I’m not the best person for this job. I’d like to leave my kingdom in the hands of people who know what they are doing.”

  “What are you saying by that?” Abigail narrowed her eyes, but didn’t seem to be glaring at Val, rather trying to puzzle it all out. “You don’t appear to have any close family to take care of the throne in your place.”

  Val licked her lips anxiously. “I’d like to leave the throne to Prince Matheus of Magalhães and his consort, Duke Fernando.”

  Silence fell upon the room. Val looked between the adults, easily able to see how surprised they were at her decision. She imagined they’d been hoping Val would become the new queen and that would be the end of it. But she didn’t feel she was qualified to rule a kingdom, and after a lifetime in a tower, it was time she got to make some decisions on her own.

  “What about a Regency Council instead?” Abigail suggested. “These are usually provided for a designated successor if an heir is too young to rule and are established for a set period of time. The Prince and the Duke can rule for the next ten years, and you’ll have time to change your mind or to step down from the throne if you still wish to.”

  Val nodded, relieved they could all find the best way to deal with the situation. “Very well. I agree.”

  “Does anyone else have something they wish to add? Or are we all in agreement?” Abigail waited for all of them to nod and then she passed the papers to Val.

  Val signed with shaky hands, barely remembering how to write her own name. She hadn’t had much reason to write in the tower. But Val felt proud when she saw the messy lines on the paper: it was done. She was free. And yet, she still couldn’t believe it.

  * * *

  After the meeting was concluded and her initial burst of optimism wore off, Val was terrified. What if her father escaped justice? What if he still came and dragged her back to the tower? Or worse?

  Jane came every few hours to bring her food and remind her to clean herself and change clothes, but she didn’t bring anyone else with her.

  Sometimes, Val thought wildly that she was back at the tower. Never leaving, never moving. But she just needed to look at the open door to remember that things were not the same anymore. Her mother’s voice came back to her in these moments, singing soft melodies that calmed her heart.

  After two anxious weeks, the Queen finally appeared in her doorway.

  Val looked up from where she sat curled up in her armchair but didn’t say anything.

  “Can I come in?” Laura asked.

  Val only nodded.

  Queen Laura walked with careful steps until she sat down on the arm of Val’s chair. She brushed Val’s golden locks away from her face and left a kiss on her temple.

  “I bring news,” she started, her voice quiet and hesitant. “Your father was captured in battle and remanded into custody until his trial.”

  Val left out the longest breath of her life. She never thought she’d live long enough to hear those words.

  “Did he have anything to say or any message for me?”

  “No.”

  Good. She didn’t want his words.

  “Our guards have brought something for you.” Laura got up and offered her hand. “Would you like to see?”

  Val followed Laura through many corridors before they reached an office on the second floor. The room was in chaos. Four guards were carrying armloads of books into the room, leaving them scattered around the various tables and cabinets. Val recognized them immediately as the ones that had kept her company in the tower.

  “I’ll give you some time,” Laura said before leaving.

  Val brushed her hands over the familiar covers, cleaning away the dust and admiring the letters in the good light. She found her favorite one after a few minutes, the book with the two girls holding each other tenderly on the cover. She hugged the book against her chest; it had been her comfort for so long in captivity, and now it would stay with her forever.

  “There are so many. I don’t think we’ll be able to fit all of them in here,” Agnes said coming in with another load of books in her arms, then left them on the table and turned to Val, looking insecure. “Was this all right? I remembered you mentioning how much you love them and felt we shouldn’t throw them away.”

  Val was touched at Agnes’ thoughtfulness. “It’s more than all right.”

  “Good,” Agnes said with a nod. Then she perked up. “Oh, there’s something else that intrigued me.” Agnes ran to the other side of the room without saying anything else. When Val followed, she saw her leaning over a familiar-looking wooden chest. It was crammed to the top with countless ripped pages.

  “What are these?” Agnes asked.

  Val kneeled by her side and brushed her hands through the pages. “I had to find a way to keep track of time when I was in the tower. Each one is a day. The night before you rescued me, I counted 2,500 pages.”

  She felt tears forming behind her eyes, the very first since she got here. Those pages were real. Her time in the tower was real. There was no way she could erase them or pretend it never happened. But she could leave them behind and learn that her past didn’t define her. What she did now was up to herself. Val could be happy in whatever way she wanted.

  Val felt a touch on her shoulder. She turned around, looking into Agnes’ eyes, loving the care and support she found.

  “Are you all right?” Agnes asked.

  “There were so many things I wanted to do while I was stuck there. I kept thinking, the day I get out of here, I’m going to do everything I always wanted. And now that this day has arrived, I don’t know where to start.”

  “Do you want to tell me about them?”

  Val sighed and shifted on the floor. “I wanted adventures. I wanted to run free in the mountains, to see all the stars in the sky witho
ut a ceiling above me, to visit all the places in the world, and learn all about different cultures and different people. I wanted romance. I wanted to fall in love, to kiss a girl, to have her hold me in her arms and see the passion in her eyes. I wanted my life to be like the things I read in all my favorite books.” Val stared at her own hands, feeling suddenly shy. “It’s funny that even in just a few weeks you gave me so much of it without trying. You gave me hope that I deserve these things and that I can still have them someday. Even if our journey together ends now, I’m glad it happened. I’m glad it was you who passed under my tower.”

  Agnes sat closer and took Val’s hands in hers. “It doesn’t need to end, you know?”

  Val looked up. “It doesn’t?”

  “I’d love to have you with me on my next journey. I could show you every corner of the world and so many things that exist out there.” Her voice was getting more excited at every second. “I could teach you more about living on the road. We could go to so many different places and—and… of course, if you ever want to go back home I’ll bring you there. It won’t be a perfect fairy tale, but it’ll be a fun and exciting life to live.”

  Val couldn’t hold back the huge grin growing on her face. “That would be lovely.”

  Agnes smiled back, but then a change came over her face, and she opened and closed her mouth a few times.

  “What is it?” Val said with a frown, worried she had said something wrong.

  “You said I gave you so much of it already. Do you mean the romance too?”

  “Oh, that was just…. you know, a silly thing…” Val stammered, hoping she sounded remotely convincing. “It’s fine that it was one-sided.”

  “It’s not silly,” Agnes said, holding her hand tighter now. “And it’s not one-sided. I feel it too.”

  Val froze for a second. It seemed too good to be true that Agnes felt the same way about her. “You do?”

  “I do.” Agnes let out a long sigh, her shoulders immediately relaxing. “Val, would it be all right if I…”

  Val leaned closer, heart fluttering. “If you?”

  “If I kissed you.”

  Val felt as if her heart was about to fly out of her chest. When she answered, it was entirely without fear. “Yes.”

  Agnes moved closer, closing her eyes and reaching for her face. Val waited for a second longer before closing her own eyes, just as she felt the touch of lips against hers.

  It wasn’t anything like she expected from all the books she’d read. Agnes’ lips tasted like chocolate and vanilla, and they were smooth and warm. Val pressed against Agnes, and she felt their mouths opening, tongues reaching out for the other. It felt like the world was becoming more luminous behind her eyelids, and a fire grew inside of her like nothing else she had felt before. But she was running out of air, and all too soon, it was over.

  But she wanted so much more.

  Val didn’t open her eyes yet. She felt her and Agnes’ noses touching together and stayed like that for a moment, their breaths mixing together.

  “How was it?” Agnes asked in a whisper.

  Val smiled, moved away, and finally opened her eyes to find a blushing Agnes waiting for an answer. “I think I need to practice more to be sure.”

  Agnes laughed with her. When they finally calmed down, she reached for Val’s hand and pulled them to their feet.

  “Come on. We have to start packing for our trip!”

  “Where are we going?” Val asked.

  “To places far and beyond, my princess. Are you ready for it?”

  Val’s heart sang loudly inside her chest. “Please, lead the way.”

  They ran out of the room, hand in hand. Val followed Agnes without fear, knowing that from now on, her life would be an entirely new and wonderful adventure. Things wouldn’t always be perfect, and happiness would sometimes feel like a distant fragile thing. But despite everything, she was ready to embrace this new life, glorious and unpredictable and finally hers.

  Acknowledgments

  It’s been a dream for quite a while to publish a fairy tale retelling starring two girls as the princesses who fall in love. Today, this story finally exists. I’d love to write more of these retellings if things work out quite well for this one. I love writing fairy tales because they bring so much hope in their simplicity and in how we can believe in hopeful, happy endings no matter what. If the real world is still a hard one to live in, we can run away to imaginary worlds where we can create our own happiness.

  Thank you to my beta readers and editors, Kayla, Niall, Agi, Ashlynn, and Riley. All of you have been a great support to this little fairy tale. RoAnna, thank you for adding your wise notes to make this a better edited story! E, P, and C; thank you for being the best friends a girl can hope for. You believe so much in me and bring me the happiest of days when we are together. Sue, who’s always here for me and is such an amazing friend; may we keep sharing our love for books for many years to come. Mana, thank you for bringing your awesome design skills to give more life to these characters.

  Thank you to all the writers out there who keep working on wonderful stories to inspire other people. I’m always amazed at the support I get from the book community both from readers and writers who send me so many encouraging and thoughtful messages. This is incredibly helpful for small writers who are just starting to explore their careers. Thank you to the Sapphic Authors Chat for the help in these last weeks. I’m so happy we started this little project to support each other in our writing.

  And thank you to my readers. Stories are written to be shared, and you’re extremely important to their existence. Keep dreaming, and keep believing in happy endings, for they’ll come to you.

  About the author

  M. Hollis could never decide what to do with her life. From the time she was a child, she has changed her ideas for a career hundreds of times. After writing in hidden notebooks during classes and daydreaming during every spare moment of her day, she decided to fully dedicate herself to her stories. When she isn’t scrolling around her social media accounts or reading lots of femslash fanfiction, you’ll find her crying about female characters and baking cookies.