Joy snorted. “Oh God! Please tell me that line has never worked before.”
Hayden winked. “Since puberty.”
It was a total lie, but Joy didn’t need to know that. Joy also didn’t need to know he had the feels for her. But if they continued down this flirty path the tightness in Hayden’s shorts told him his desires would be painfully obvious.
“Well, as fun as this has been, maybe we should head in,” Hayden said, hoping to deflect his real feelings. “I should really be taking it easy and this has been more than enough.”
Concern creased Joy’s brow and she paddled closer to him, not stopping until their boards were touching. She reached for his wrist and he felt his heart skitter to a halt. “What are you doing?”
“I’m checking your pulse.”
Hayden pulled his arm away. The last thing he needed was for Joy to feel how wildly his heart was beating at the moment. She’d definitely misconstrue it for a medical issue and tell her uncle he wasn’t fit for ACE. But for once, Hayden’s heart wasn’t the problem. Joy was the problem, along with Hayden’s overwhelming desire for her. “I’m fine. You’re right. I’ll get the next one.”
“Are you sure?” Jo asked. “We can go in.”
“I’m sure.”
After staring at him a beat too long she nodded. “Okay.”
She sat up on her board and he did the same.
“Watch the sets,” she said pointing toward the waves in the distance. “You gotta pick your wave when it’s all the way out there.”
“Really?”
Joy’s hand cupped Hayden’s jaw and lightly readjusted where he was looking. “Look at the space between the rollers. It’ll tell you everything you need to know.”
Shit. He tried to concentrate on the waves, and not the fact that Joy was touching his face. Hayden cleared his throat. “What do I need to know?”
“How much time you’ll have. How fast you’ll have to paddle. How long your ride will be.”
Hayden arched an eyebrow. “You get all that from looking at a wave?”
She laughed. “Okay, I know it sounds cheesy, but just try this, okay? It’s what I do.” She placed her hand on his chest. “Breathe in with the top of that first roller.”
He did.
“Now hold your breath and count the seconds before the next wave takes its place.”
Hold my breath, Joy?
I couldn’t breathe if I wanted to.
Not with your hand over my heart.
“Breathe in.”
Somehow he managed to do what she asked.
“Good, now hold your breath and count again.”
He did.
“Breathe in.”
He did.
“Breathe out.”
Out.
“In.”
In.
“Out.”
Out.
“Good. You got it. Just keep doing that. If you breathe when the ocean does you can feel it here,” she said tapping her fingers against his chest. “If you can feel it, you’ll know when you’ve found the right wave.”
Or maybe the right girl.
I think I’ve found her, Joy.
I think it’s you.
Hayden’s eyes were locked on Joy’s now, the waves long forgotten. This time she held his gaze. Her green eyes were all he saw. They blotted out the ocean and sky, turning the world a lush, emerald shade of perfection. Green was the color of lust, envy, jealousy, and Hayden was suddenly struck with understanding. When he looked at Joy, he’d never wanted anything more.
“Can you feel it?” she whispered, still staring into his eyes, her hand melting into his chest.
He nodded. “I feel it.” He slid his hand up to cover hers. “But don’t you ever get tired of holding your breath?”
“All the time,” she whispered.
Her words floored him. She’d answered a real question. And she was still so caught up in their moment that she hadn’t seemed to realize it yet. Hayden knew without a doubt they were no longer talking about surfing and he wanted to press for more. He wanted to pull her onto his board and kiss her in the middle of the ocean. She felt it too, he knew she did. His hand was over hers, pressing it into his chest like he hoped she would pluck his heart right out and hold onto it forever.
It’s yours, Joy, just take it.
My heart, my everything.
I’m yours, Joy.
Joy swallowed and bit her bottom lip. Just one look at her white teeth crushing the petal soft skin of her lips and Hayden was a goner. He could feel the need hammering in his veins and he was powerless to stop himself from reaching over to free her trapped lip.
She didn’t stop him.
You want me to kiss you, don’t you, Joy?
Hayden decided not to wait for her to answer his unspoken question. He already knew what her answer would be. But he also knew the truth. He felt it as she leaned into his touch. His hand settled on the slender curve of her neck and pulled her closer. His lips fit over hers just as he remembered—with painful perfection.
Joy tasted like salt, like heaven, like happiness, like sunshine, like freedom, like second chances, like all the things Hayden longed for. When she didn’t pull away, his kiss grew bolder. His tongue swept past her lips, tasting even more of her, breathing her in, sharing her breaths, her hopes, her dreams.
A large swell threatened to pull them apart, but Hayden grabbed her board keeping her next to him. Her hand slid up his chest. Her pressure was light, but it was enough for him to know she wanted to pull back. Reluctantly, Hayden ended their kiss. He couldn’t bring himself to pull away from her. He was too scared of what he’d see in her eyes. Regret, disgust, shame, guilt? He didn’t want to see any of those emotions flickering in her green eyes. He just wanted to keep kissing her. He wanted to hold onto this perfect moment before it slipped away, like another wave he couldn’t catch.
Hayden kept his forehead pressed against Joy’s.
“Hayden,” she whispered. “We can’t.”
“Why not?”
“You know why.”
“Because of ACE?”
“And other things.”
“Like what?”
“Rules.”
Hayden finally pulled back to look at Joy, frustration filling his lungs. “Right now, I can’t think of one damn good reason not to pull you onto this surfboard and kiss you until you forget all about the fucking rules.”
Joy
Jo gasped. She’d never thought she’d want to hear Hayden say something like that to her, but now that he had it was all she wanted. She wanted to be kissed that way. She wanted to be wanted that way. She wanted to feel the intensity of his passion. Because the way he was looking at her threatened to boil the whole damn ocean.
But she couldn’t give in to her desires. She couldn’t let herself be swept away in the moment, no matter how badly she wanted to.
Hayden pulled her toward him again but she stiffened. “Please don’t.”
“Why?”
“Rules, Hayden. We agreed no questions.”
“Jesus! I don’t agree anymore. Unless you can tell me why you don’t want this when I know you do, I’m going to kiss you again.”
Jo’s heart tore past the point of no return. She couldn’t handle this. She couldn’t look into those blue, blue eyes and deny she felt nothing. She felt like she was drowning. And she wanted to drown in Hayden.
She sucked in a breath, angry at her crumbling resolve. “Why are you doing this to me?”
“Because I don’t want to give you up.” Hayden’s voice softened and his hand caressed Jo’s cheek. “I’ve already given up too much in my life. I’m done with that. I’m done wondering what could’ve been if I’d only gone after what I want.”
“You’re here for five more weeks, Hayden. There’s nothing to wonder about.”
“You don’t know that.”
“But I do. I know how this story ends. I’ve seen it a thousand times. It ends with you ge
tting kicked out of ACE and me losing my job. It ends with heartbreak.”
“It doesn’t have to.” There was longing in his voice and so much hope in his eyes that Jo had to look away.
“Hayden, I’m not who you think I am.”
He pulled her chin back to face him. “I don’t need you to be anyone other than who you are.”
Jo’s heart tore a little more. She wanted to sob. She wanted to scream. But more than all of that, she wanted to hand this boy her battered heart. She wanted to let him see all the broken parts of her, and she wanted him not to turn away. “Hayden, you don’t know me. And if you did . . .”
“And if I did, I’d count my blessings. Stop holding back, Joy. That’s all I’m asking.” Hayden’s hand softly caressed her cheek as his blue eyes implored her. “I may not know everything about you, Joy, but I know you’re a girl who doesn’t need anyone’s approval to be who she is. Because you’re enough. You’re more than enough.”
That did it. Her heart tore all the way this time. And as the pieces fell, so did Jo. She fell right into Hayden’s arms. Her lips met his again and this time she didn’t hold back.
27
Hayden
Joy shrieked with laughter as Hayden hauled her over his shoulder to trudge out of the water. They’d both stayed in the ocean way too long, kissing and floating, floating and kissing. Hayden’s limbs were waterlogged, his skin pruned, but he didn’t care. It was worth every single second, because Joy gave in.
I knew you liked me, Joy.
He grinned as he smacked her firm ass.
“Put me down!”
“Nope.”
She giggled, but still tried to sound tough when she ordered him to put her down again. But Hayden had no intention of putting her down unless it was on top of him.
“Put me down, Hayden. I’m serious.”
“Yeah, seriously crazy about me.” He swung her around, threatening to drop her in the sand.
She yelped as Hayden dangled her head inches from the sand. Piper came dashing to her rescue, licking sloppy kisses all over Joy’s salty face.
“Get her!” Hayden cheered.
When the dog had her fill, Hayden finally lowered Joy onto the sand and crawled over her, adding his own kisses to her face.
“Hayden . . .”
He groaned as she pulled away. “Do we only work in the water or something? ‘Cause I could totally learn to live with that. I mean, I’m a pretty good swimmer . . .” he teased.
Joy laughed. “No. I don’t know. Maybe?”
She bit her lip and Hayden’s hand was instantly there to rescue it. “Stop thinking about everything so much.”
“I can’t help it. There’s a lot to think about.”
“Not really. We like kissing each other, so let’s keep doing it.”
“Do you always just do what you want?”
He laughed. “Rarely ever.”
“Really?”
“Yes. My father runs my life and I’m always the good little puppet. Jumping when he says jump. Swimming when he says swim. But you know what I learned today, Joy? Parents don’t always know what’s best for us. Because this,” he pressed his lips to hers. “This is what’s best for me. This is what feels good. This is what I want to fill the next five weeks of my life with.”
She sighed into another kiss. When she drew back her eyes glowed like they were lit from within. “How come every time I talk myself out of this you find a way to make it sound so easy?”
“‘Cause it is easy, Joy. Nothing has ever felt so easy in all my life. And I don’t want to stop.”
“Neither do I,” she whispered.
Hayden grinned. “Then let’s not stop.”
“Okay. But I think we’re gonna need some more rules.”
Joy
Jo and Hayden were all smiles by the time they left the beach. This could work. They’d come up with a few more rules to make sure they didn’t get caught, all of which boiled down to keeping whatever was going on between them secret. Jo even vowed to keep it from Kendall and her brothers. There was just too much at risk for Hayden and Jo if anyone found out.
They’d also decided to keep their earlier rules intact. Hayden was the one to bring up the no questions rule and Jo was relieved when he said he wanted to keep it. He said since they only had five weeks they should just try to keep it light and enjoy the time they had together. That was fine by Jo. No questions meant that Kai would stay out of this, where he belonged.
Kai. Just thinking about him made her feel guilty. She’d always thought Kai would be enough for her. She wanted him to be enough. And maybe he still could be. Maybe Jo just had to get whatever this was with Hayden out of her system. Maybe then things would go back to the way they were meant to be—Jo and Kai against the world.
Hayden reached over and took Jo’s hand. Heat instantly ignited in her belly, reminding her of the last rule she’d made: no sex. It was a wise decision. Sex made things real. And the way Hayden brushed his thumb across the back of her hand caused a reaction in Jo’s heart that was plenty real enough.
As she turned Jezebel back onto the ACE campus, Jo did her best to school her features. She glanced in the rearview to make sure all traces of her earlier bliss were gone. It was useless. She still felt it in her chest. Kissing Hayden made her feel lighter than she had in years, and somehow that was reflected in her face. She couldn’t dull the life Hayden had brought back to her eyes anymore than she could dull her attraction to him.
You deserve this, Joy.
You’re allowed to grab onto this one tiny slice of happiness.
You have a long road ahead.
Let this be the thing that sustains you.
After her internal pep talk, Jo parked the van.
“You ready for this?” Hayden asked, his smile glowing like it was fueled by the sun.
“Hayden, we have to keep this a secret.”
“I know.”
“Then you need to find a way to turn that smile off, because I’m pretty sure it’s visible from space.”
He laughed. “Noted.”
He mimed a gesture of turning down a dial and made his grin into a grimace.
Jo rolled her eyes, trying not to find even his frown charming. It was useless. It’s like the boy was designed specifically for her. Everything he did drew her in.
“Come on, New York. You’ve caused enough trouble for one day.”
Jo made a point to walk a good distance away from Hayden as he helped carry her surfboards back to her place. Piper trotted along between them as Jo scanned the campus to see if anyone was watching. So far, the place was deserted. It was early still. The athletes would still be out training. She was in the clear.
Relief spread through Jo like a fine whiskey. She let herself relax as she showed Hayden where to stow the surfboards. They washed the boards off and Jo turned the hose on Piper. “You’re next, sandy paws.”
“You’re gonna give her a cold bath?” Hayden asked. “What is it with this place?”
“No, I’ll give her a bath inside. I’m just washing off her paws so she doesn’t track the beach all over my place.”
“Like you’d be able to tell in that pigpen.”
“Hey!” Jo turned the hose on Hayden and he yelped as the cold water hit him. It was adorable.
“Mercy! Mercy!” he yelled.
“You’re such a baby.”
“I fully admit I’m a baby when it comes to cold showers. However, I wasn’t aware freezing water was part of the ACE training regiment.”
Jo laughed. “Ah, the old five minute shit, shower and shave. Jack’s favorite. I know it all too well.”
Hayden’s eyes widened. “He didn’t make you do that, did he? I mean it’s physically impossible to do all of your business in five minutes and look presentable.”
“He absolutely did. And it absolutely is.”
“What?”
“If it was good enough for the Marines it was good enough for Jack’s kids.�
��
“He does realize you’re not Marines, right?”
“Well, technically Ryan is, but honestly, he raised us all to be Marines.”
“Wait, Jack raised you?”
“Yeah. I’ve lived with him and my aunt Pam since I was born.”
“What about your parents?”
Joy’s face fell. “Are you using one of your questions?”
“No. Sorry. I just . . .” he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I’m still getting used to the rules.”
“It’s okay.”
Hayden rubbed that back of his neck. “Well that explains a lot.”
“What do you mean?”
“You were raised by a Marine. You can’t help that you’re an intimidating badass.”
She snorted. “I am not.”
Hayden cocked an eyebrow. “Trust me, you are.” Then his eyes narrowed. “Jesus. That’s not what you want to do, is it? You’re not in training to be a Marine or something, are you?”
Jo shot him a warning glance. “That’s another question.”
“Right. Sorry.”
She couldn’t help smiling as she finished washing Piper off and lead her up the stairs. Hayden stood there looking torn between following or wallowing, and Jo decided to take pity on him.
“No, I don’t want to be a Marine. Now come inside and help me wash this mutt off since it’s your fault she’s full of sand.”
Hayden’s grin instantly replaced his internal strife and he bounded up the stairs two at a time.
Hayden
“I’m telling ya, Piper. You’ve got it made. I know you live in a tornado of dirty dishes and nasty laundry, but at least you have hot water. You don’t know what it’s like in the ACE barracks.”
Joy cracked a towel at Hayden, who was shamelessly cuddling Piper instead of drying her after her bath.
Hayden gave Jo his best glare, before turning a conspiratorial eye toward the dog. “See the kind of stuff I have to put up with? Towel snapping, cold showers . . .”
“Oh my God, just take a shower here already.”
“Really?” He couldn’t hide the shock from his voice. “You’d let me shower here?”
The Summer Boyfriend Page 12