Our moment of solitude was disrupted by screams of hysteria from two women, and the frenzied clicking of heels on pavement. It sounded like a team of runaway horses was about to trample the women running right towards us. Kelly and Lindsey had escaped the long arm of the law. I still had my arms around Hunter, but it didn’t stop my best friends, the fugitive felons, from throwing their arms around us. Then I heard a crackling sound at my feet. I was in the middle of being smothered, so I couldn’t look down. Must be a piece of glass. My brain was quiet for a few seconds. Then it hit me. Broken glass! Kelly dropped that fucking vial!
Chapter Eighteen
Witchnapped!
There was a loud clap of thunder and we found ourselves standing in a meeting room of some sort. The shock of having been unexpectedly, and somewhat violently, transported to an entirely new location, prevented me from initially recognizing the room. Once I gathered my wits, I realized that we were in the familiar conference room of the witch’s union.
Hunter was standing perfectly still and trying to absorb what had happened. “Holy fucking shit! Nobody move! I don’t know what the fuck is going on here. Where are we? Does anyone know what happened?”
“Hunter! It’s okay. We’re okay. We’re at the witch’s union headquarters.” I tried to explain.
“I don’t even care where we are, as long as I’m not getting arrested for trying to assassinate the mayor of Chicago.” Lindsey said calmly.
“Huh? Witch’s Union headquarters? You were trying to kill the mayor?”
“Yeah, but I dropped that vial of magic potion and we got shot out of there like fucking human cannonballs. Instant migraine for me.” Kelly rubbed her forehead.
“Magic potion? What the hell? I’ve lost my mind.” Poor Hunter was totally bewildered. “Who are you?” He addressed Esmeralda and Marie, who had just walked in.
“I’m Esmeralda, I’m a Salem witch. This is Marie Laveau, Voodoo Queen of New Orleans and the Louisiana bayou country. The stud of the month club didn’t list a policeman until November, but don’t worry big boy, we won’t turn you away.” She walked up to Hunter and patted his broad chest. “Will we Marie?”
“Hey! That’s my stud! Get your hands off of him.” I barked.
Then Hunter suddenly became perfectly content. He took his cell phone from his pocket and was getting ready to make a call.
“Hunter? Are you okay? What are you doing?” His sudden change from being on the verge of an explosion to complete calm, worried me.
“I’m calling 911. I’ve never experienced this type of thing, but I’ve heard about it. I’m experiencing some sort of intense break from reality. Hallucinations. The whole bit. The brain is really an amazing thing and what it does under stress is incredible. All of the intense police training, realizing that I’ve fallen in love, and she wants me to move in. I mean, who wouldn’t feel like the bubble has moved a bit off zero on the sanity meter. I’m probably laying on the floor in a fetal position. Probably in the bathroom or something, totally out of my mind talking to imagined people that seem so real. A week or two in a psych ward and I’ll be fine, I bet.”
“Did you say you’ve fallen in love with me?” Tears streaked down my face and I squeezed him a little harder than necessary. “You’re not losing your mind. This is real. I know it’s weird, and sudden, but it’s absolutely happening.”
“Yuck! What is it wrong these new witches today? Tell me, Marie. Such schmaltzy behavior! And crying over a damn man.” Esmeralda feigned spitting on the ground. “Pathetic!”
Marie was more sympathetic. “Oh, I don’t know. It’s kind of sweet, really. It’s as if she’s been shagged by Cupid himself.”
“Let me tell you Doll, the day some so-called men tried to burn me at the stake was the day that I learned they are good for one thing. Well, maybe two things if they have a nice schlong and a good tongue. But certainly no man is worthy of this kind of emotional gutting of oneself.”
Hunter sat down in one of the chairs that lined the long conference table. “I need a minute. Or a week.”
“I’m really glad you all showed up. We were just going to summon you. You, your friends, the entire lot.” Marie stated.
“Are we in trouble with you too?” Lindsey asked.
“Everyone take a seat. We have a serious problem and it’ll take all of us to solve it.” Marie sat at the end of the table. To our surprise, Randy walked in carrying the ancient grimoire. “Thank you, Randy. Please set it on the table and take a seat.” Randy gently set the old book down and after exchanging some quick greetings, he sat next to Kelly. Marie pulled down a screen and turned on a projector. A bright and cheery picture of Gertie appeared. “As you all know, this is the witch, Gertie O’Leary.” In the image, Gertie was smiling as she stood in a patch of tall vividly colored flowers. In the background was her wildly painted antebellum home. “We’ve just issued a Magenta Alert for Gertie O’Leary.”
“Magenta Alert?” Kelly asked what we all wanted to know.
“Like an Amber Alert, but for a witch gone missing.” Esmeralda informed us.
“Randy came to us and reported that Gertie has been missing without any contact, for four days now. Apparently, she was taking a newly created dragon to a customer in Asia.” Marie clicked on a computer mouse that brought up a large map of Asia. There were numerous pink dots scattered around the map. “Each of these maps represents the location of a witch. We have verified that none of them have ordered a dragon from the Paranormal Pet Shop and none have reported seeing Gertie. It is possible that she wasn’t telling Randy the truth, or—”
“Or, Randy was being a complete airhead and just doesn’t remember where Gertie was going.” I pointed out.
Marie took out a small bag and poured the contents in her hand. She blew it into Hunter’s face.
“What the hell? Marie?” I was shocked.
“Don’t worry. That will just calm him down and make him realize that everything that is happening makes perfect sense.”
“How about that? Making a man instantly understand something? You ought to market that shit. You could call it Pull Your Head Out Powder.” Kelly said flatly.
“Hunter? Please don’t be mad at me. I was going to tell you about all of this witch business. I’ve only known about this myself for a couple of months.”
“Leigh, I’m not mad. Somehow it doesn’t seem so crazy.” Hunter seemed like he had pulled out of his state of shock. He was genuinely interested in the case of the missing witch. “Have you checked all of her business records? Any phone records, letters or notes indicating that she was trying to complete this order? And who the customer was?”
Randy was a complete mess. “No I mean yes, I looked. There was nothing to be found. But that’s Gertie. She just comes and goes. She would never leave for a few days without checking in on her pets, especially the cats.”
“This could mean that she was tricked by someone to create a, um, a dragon, and deliver it to a false address. Witchnapped, I guess you’d say.” Hunter speculated. “Does your locator map show real-time information on the location of—” Hunter paused, rubbed his forehead and then continued, “witches?” He looked at me. “I cannot believe I just said that.”
“Yes, and that was going to be my next point. It usually does. Sometimes a witch won’t show up on the map, but only temporarily. Gertie hasn’t been showing up at all.” The somber tone in Marie’s voice told us that she was considering the worse. There was a collective gasp as we all realized what this could mean.
I wasn’t about to give in to fear. “Come on! Don’t even think it. We are going to mount a world-wide witchhunt. The likes of which hasn’t been seen since the Inquisition.”
“I agree, Leigh. When I asked Randy about anything new or different that has happened, he told me that he and you two found this rare grimoire.” She pointed at Kelly and Lindsey. “Esmeralda and I are going to take a look at it and see if somehow Gertie may have poked her nose in there and accidentally—w
ell, I don’t want to go into worse case scenarios here. We’ll see what kind of magic this thing contains.”
“Elspeth!” Randy shouted.
“Gesundheit.” Esmeralda said.
“No! I didn’t sneeze. How could I forget to mention Elspeth?”
“Let me get my list out, and we’ll go over the reasons.” Kelly was in her typical deadpan fashion.
Randy went onto explain the entire story of how he and Gertie had travelled to a Scottish castle, to meet with a new client named Elspeth. He also told of his discovery of the painting that portrayed my magic desk. I added to his information by explaining our plans for tagging along with Gertie and Randy, when they went to submit their design proposal.
Marie was thinking about the name and she was deep in thought. “Elspeth. The name seems like it might ring a bell, but I can’t place it. I just can’t recall hearing about her. How about you Esmeralda?”
“Elspeth. The only Elspeth I’ve heard of is Elspeth Ross. It can’t be her. She was banished and her powers completely stripped. I believe it was in the late 1700’s. She would be long gone by now, so really, it can’t be her.”
“Do you know what the offense was?”
“Murder. She was outed for being a witch by her husband. He was a wealthy duke. She escaped from a sham witchcraft trial in Scotland and then came back for revenge against hubby. He disappeared and the Witchcraft Authority at the time must have had some proof that she whacked him. She was a fugitive from the human authorities for being a witch, and then being charged with murder by her fellow witches, well, I suppose that the Authority felt she was a liability to the witch community. That was the end of her witch days. I think she was sent to live the rest of her mortal life in exile. I have no idea where.”
Hunter pushed the grimoire towards Marie. “I think you should take a look at this. Could it be, that this book is Elspeth’s old book of spells? Maybe when she was unwitched, or whatever you call it, this book was just lost until Leigh’s friends found it in that antique store. If it is, I think we might find out that there is more going on than just the witchnapping of Gertie.”
“Esmeralda, would you take a look at this. I have one more piece of information that I need an answer on from Gertie’s friends.” Marie took the computer mouse and clicked a few times until a new image appeared on the projection screen. It was a video feed of Gertie’s hot fireman, Brad. “Personally, this my suspect number one in Gertie’s disappearance. Who is this delicious looking specimen, and what his association with Gertie.”
“That’s Brad! It’s Gertie’s boyfriend.” I watched the video of Brad frantically clawing at the walls of a locked room like a caged animal. “Where is he?”
Marie didn’t seem impressed. “Brad? Well, I had Brad zapped into a holding room here a couple of hours ago. And before you all flip out, I’ll tell you why. That boy reeks of witchcraft. It seems like more spells have been thrown on him than a damn voodoo doll. And, I found out that he’s been nosing around New Orleans and inquiring about Gertie. I thought he was a stalker that she had been trying to fend off.”
“No! No, he’s a really nice guy. He was probably looking for Gertie since he couldn’t get ahold of her either, so he just went looking for her.”
Lindsey clapped her hands together. “How romantic. He came all the way from Chicago to find her. It’s like he’s her knight in shining armor!”
Marie reached into a box on the table and took out another bag full of powder. “He’s going to need a big league sized hit of this.” She picked up her little broom and tapped on the table. Brad instantly appeared in the room. He was still swinging his arms about. When he saw where he had suddenly appeared he started screaming incoherently. Marie blew the dose into his face and Brad suddenly calmed down. “Hi Brad, everything’s fine. We’re witches, and we are trying to find your girl, Gertie. She’s a witch too. We want to help you. Do you understand?”
“Um. Sure. Witches? Okay. Somehow it all makes perfect sense. I never would have thought.” Brad took a seat with the rest of us.
Suddenly, Esmeralda shouted. “Well I’ll be a new age pagan! This is Elspeth’s! I should say, it was Elspeth’s. Now, what does this mean?”
“I don’t think it means anything. I don’t see how that could have anything to do with Gertie’s disappearance.” I was perplexed.
Hunter, on the other hand, saw this as something relevant. “Leigh, right now there isn’t much to go on, so we have to take anything, even if it seems purely coincidental, and consider it. I say, we go to Scotland and pay this Elspeth a visit. Who knows? We might find a clue there. If nothing else, we might eliminate Elspeth as a suspect in her disappearance.”
Marie listened carefully to Hunter’s words and silently thought over a plan. “I agree with Hunter. We need to check this out. What if, somehow, Elspeth Ross managed to retain her witch powers after being exiled? What if she’s back, and up to no good? I think that someone needs to check out Elspeth’s castle, but you can’t just pop in on her and accuse her of something as serious as witchnapping Gertie. We need a plan.”
Chapter Nineteen
Into the Witch’s Lair
“I’m the only one here that she has met. How about I return with my presentation, alone? I can snoop around.” Randy surprised all of us by volunteering to return to the old witch’s castle on his own.
“Brave, Randy. But not smart. If she does have Gertie locked up there or something, you might be next. You could use some company, like me. I have plenty of experience in keeping you out of trouble.” Kelly was apparently ready to join her brother.
Lindsey wasn’t about to be left out. “What would be her motive? Why would she nab Gertie? What would Gertie have that Elspeth would want from her so badly? If you both are going, I am too. You can use me on this trip. I’m pretty good at guessing the ending of just about every criminal mystery drama on TV.”
“It goes without saying, I’ll be along.” Brad stood up and reached his hand out. We all just looked as he hovered the palm of his hand over the table. “Come on!”
Randy quickly explained. “I believe he wants us to do that team hand stack thing. You know, we all stack our hands on top of each other’s and then someone yells out a word or short phrase or motivation.”
“Cool! We never get to do this.” Lindsey said excitedly.
“Ugh. I suppose, if I have to.” Kelly was not inspired.
We stacked our hands. Mine was the last to pile on. I pushed down and yelled out, “Let’s get Sunshine!”
The decision was made. Esmeralda and Marie would remain at the headquarters while we infiltrated the castle grounds. Randy would meet with Elspeth alone and keep her busy while we snooped around for any clue of Gertie’s presence. Marie produced a small, black rectangular device. “Now, anything you find out. Use this to contact me and Esmeralda right away.” I handled it carefully.
“Okay. Is there a magic spell I need to say or anything?”
“You open it up and you press the button labeled number six. It speed dials right to me.” Marie pointed out, as if she had provided me with the latest discovery in magic.
“Oh. An old flip phone. Sorry, I expected something a little more—magical. But, we all have cell phones.”
Kelly looked at it. “That model is at least fifteen years old. Does it still work?”
“All right, use your own damn phones. Get my number from Randy then.” Marie said.
Within minutes, Esmeralda tapped her broom on the table and mumbled a few words. When the smoke cleared, we found ourselves standing together on a narrow gravel road. It was quite late, and our only light came from the stars and the eerie illumination that came from the half moon. The path ahead led to a rocky crag, atop which stood Elspeth’s lair. We could make out the outline of its old grey stones, against the shimmering moonlit sea that lay beyond. It created a dark spectral image of the foreboding old castle. The distant sound of waves thrashing against the unseen rugged shore below, provid
ed an aural accompaniment that enhanced the all-consuming gloom.
A howl of the wolf, echoing from some dark, cold primeval place in the distant hills, could only be described as a warning. A warning to turn away and avoid having to share in its cries of despair. Despite the chills that went through our bodies, our collective courage seemed to propel us forward. We went on, ready to face the ancient witch. We slowly moved closer and closer with slow, deliberate steps. With each footfall on the path, I heard the soft crunching sounds of the dew covered gravel shifting, sliding—as if it was trying to unnerve us. I was ready to turn and run. Then, up on the rugged parapet of the castle, we saw the shadowy outline of a woman. Her long hair blew in the wind and her dress fluttered behind her. She stood stoically alone, a living gargoyle of despair.
“Hey ya’ guys!” Gertie’s undeniably cheery voice rang through the night. “What are you doing here?” We froze, in complete surprise.
Hunter flicked on his powerful police flashlight and shined a beam up the castle wall. It was only Gertie who stood above us. Undeniably cheery Gertie, all right. And she was in all of her pink clothed glory.
Kelly nearly kicked Hunter. “You had a fucking flashlight this whole time? And you never turned it on? Jesus Christ Hunter! I nearly shit myself when that wolf started howling. Not to mention when Gertie started yodeling like a fucking loon from the top of that God damned spooky castle. Quick, shine it on my hair. Did it turn white? Seriously, Leigh, Lindsey, look at my hair. I swear if it turned white with fright, there is going to be hell to pay.”
Hopeful Leigh (Literal Leigh Romance Diaries Book 3) Page 11