Divya’s voice hardens. “You’re acting selfish. I understand you’re angry, but this is only going to get you killed. You need to follow my instructions and carry out whatever assignments Fiona gives you. Even if those assignments don’t include going on missions. You can’t just start looking for Arsen, Tasia. You’re not even experienced enough to fight monsters.”
“And how long will I have to wait to kill Arsen? Years? He’s still here, in Philadelphia. That’s why I’m being kept inside the base, but I don’t see anyone doing anything about it! Why hasn’t he been found if he’s so close?”
Divya purses her lips. “We have been looking, but he obviously hasn’t wanted to be found. He’s different from the monsters we’ve hunted. Tracking a demon isn’t the same as tracking a monster, though they can be plenty hard to find as well. Rynne has been searching for Arsen and Yuki since he was fourteen, and he hasn’t even come face to face with them.
“It’s not just Arsen, Tasia. You remember what happened in Reverie. There were more demons than just Arsen. Rynne reported another demon, Yuki, staying by his side, but he didn’t know about any other demons that might be working under Arsen. I haven’t seen either of them. I don’t know how much of this is both of your vendetta or if Arsen is even the demon that’s really in control here. Be patient. We will find him. We’ll eventually be able to track him down, and when we do, we’ll learn very important details about demons. It will be better for everyone. Darkness has been growing out of hand, and if demons are to blame, we need to know all we can about them. We’re working, Tasia. Even if you aren’t seeing immediate results, we’re all working.”
“But I’m right here! Why don’t you people use the resources right in front of you?”
Tears are pouring out of my eyes now. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t know how I’m ever going to give my parents justice if things go on like this. Arsen wants me for something. The way he attacked Didi and tried to find out more information about me only proves it.
“Use me as bait,” I beg, hoping Divya will react to the idea better than Fiona did. I hope she’ll at least consider it.
She keeps her voice low and authoritative. “I want you to stop talking like this right now.”
“It could work!” I insist. “All we have to do is use me as bait. Just make it look like I’m out on my own and bring backup or something. Or maybe, if he got close enough, I’d be able to kill him myself. I have a silver knife. Rynne said silver weapons are the best way to kill demons, right? He’s even killed a demon before. I could—”
“Enough!” Divya shouts. Then she speaks again, her voice quiet, “Enough. You’re taking a break from all of this. You’re going to have a hunter assigned to you at all times to make sure you don’t do anything rash.”
“You’re making a mistake!” I scream.
She shakes her head. “It’s for the best.”
TRUE TO HER WORD, Divya has had someone watch me constantly since the day I decided not to be receptive to the spirits around me. Maybe I shouldn’t have done what I did. Maybe I should have followed her instructions. I would have, in the past. I’ve never been much of the rebellious type, and I don’t enjoy confrontation, but I’m not the same person I was. I feel different. Angry. Even impulsive.
I’m assigned different hunters to keep watch over me all day and all night. None of them seem too happy about it, and, by extension, none of them try to make conversation with me. I’m fine with that, though. I don’t want to talk to any of them either. I don’t feel like talking to anyone. I already tried that. I tried to get Fiona to see things on my side of this, but she told me there was nothing to discuss. What Divya said goes.
By this point, I’ve pretty much grounded myself to my room. I haven’t even gone out of my way to see Rynne. Sometimes I read. Other times I just stare up at my ceiling and think too much. Having so much lonely free time makes me feel worse, but I can’t bring myself to make it better.
When I hear a knock on my door, I don’t bother to ask who’s there. My hunter babysitter takes care of it.
“It’s Rynne,” the voice on the other side of the door announces. “I have permission from the commander to talk to Tasia in private.”
This is the first time in the last few days that I’ve felt some of the weight on my chest being lifted. It’s like I can already feel Rynne’s light coming in through my door. Why have I been avoiding him? Maybe I was hoping he’d go out of his way to visit me like this. Maybe I was hoping he’d come to make me feel better.
I’m terrible.
My babysitter goes to the door, exchanges a few words and a paper with Rynne, and then leaves my room as Rynne takes his place.
I’m not sure how I should feel when I look at the always composed, always handsome, boy in front of me. Part of me feels immediate relief, a flood of good emotions. The other part of me wishes he hadn’t come. He’s so much better than me in every way. I don’t deserve to be his friend, and I definitely shouldn’t have the feelings I have for him. I don’t have a right to those either. I turn around so I don’t have to face him.
My heart speeds up when I feel the slightest movement of my bed as he sits opposite of me. I can feel the tickling sensation of his back barely brushing against mine.
“What’s been going on?” he asks.
I lean back a little, just so I can feel his back firmly pressed against mine. Then I close my eyes as I try to sort through my thoughts. “Divya thinks I’m being hasty, self-destructive or something. I tried to make contact with my parents when Divya only wanted me to listen to one of the spirits around me. Then I suggested the hunters use me as bait to draw Arsen out.”
Rynne’s back grows rigid against mine.
I swiftly add, “You understand, don’t you? I’m not being hasty. If Arsen is really hanging around here for me, using me as bait only makes sense. Please, Rynne… I need you to—”
“To what?” he interrupts. “Condone using you as a human sacrifice?”
“I won’t become a human sacrifice.” I play with my fingers, wondering if I’m telling the truth. “He didn’t kill me before, so he must want me for something else. We’ll set up a trap. You’ll all be there with the other hunters to take Arsen out before anything can happen to me. It’d be perfect. I’ll be useful, even if I can’t hurt him myself. Isn’t that worth it? I mean, if Fiona and Divya would just give me another chance, I could contact my parents. Maybe they could tell us things about Arsen you don’t know. They must be out there. Divya said she couldn’t find them, but I’m their daughter. I bet I could. Maybe they’re waiting back in Reverie. It’s not like Divya ever went to Reverie.”
“I don’t know anything about communicating with spirits,” Rynne reminds. “But Divya does. You should listen to her. If she says you need a break, you do. You’ve been working yourself too hard. The way you’re talking proves it.”
I groan. “Not you, too. Why does everyone think I need rest? Hasn’t it crossed anyone’s mind that the only way I’m going to get back to normal is if Arsen dies? He’s always in here, Rynne.” I let my words fall to a whisper as I bring one hand to my head and the other to my chest. “His name. How he feels. He’s always there. I’ll only ever be me again when he goes away.”
“Hasn’t it crossed your mind that getting revenge isn’t going to erase the pain of your parents’ death? It isn’t going to erase your pain or your anger. Your parents died and they are never coming back,” he chastises. “You have to be strong for them, Tasia. You have to be strong or you won’t stand a chance against Arsen. Stop letting his evil consume you. You have the power to do that. You are the master of your own mind and soul.
“The world is bigger than Arsen. He’s only a small part of evil in a world full of it. Simply killing him isn’t going to change anything. Don’t you remember what you told me before? You said you didn’t want bad things to happen anymore. You said you want to protect Reverie. Remember that. Remember your light.”
My hands ball into fists in my lap as I fight against another bout of tears. I can’t keep crying. I can do something about my parents’ murderer. I can bring them justice. I can kill Arsen.
“Tasia,” Rynne says as he softens his voice, “I know it’s hard, but Blade and Divya are only trying to keep you safe. That’s why they won’t use you as bait. They care about you. They love you.”
“Fiona should be on my side! She was their friend! She was their friend…”
I feel the springs in my mattress creak and groan as Rynne shifts. I can’t feel the warmth of his back against mine anymore, but the warmth of his chest and arms make up for that as he takes me into a comforting hug.
“You’re not alone, Tasia,” he whispers. “How many times do I have to tell you that before you realize it’s true?”
I take in his warmth and the almost lemony scent of him. I don’t know how long he holds me. I don’t even realize I’m dozing off in his embrace until he moves away from me.
“I have to go,” he says.
I refuse to turn around and look at him. I also refuse to say goodbye to him; however, I listen intently when the door opens and closes. I’m sure he’s gone now, so I look over my shoulder to see a new hunter assigned to watch me for the night.
No one understands. I do want to find and stop Arsen for my parents’ sake, but I also need to do it for my own sake, and for Rynne’s too. He has his claws buried inside of my head and heart. All of these confusing thoughts and feelings… I know they’ll stop when he’s gone. I just know it.
I PRETEND TO SLEEP while my babysitter sits by the door in her chair. She isn’t doing her job very well. I’ve already seen her doze off a few times. She tried fighting sleep the first few times it threatened to take her over, but now she’s just sitting there snoring. I’ve been thinking about sneaking out, but I haven’t really considered it until this moment.
Since I’ve been living at the base, I’ve noticed it empties at night. Hunters try to keep their hunting times to daylight hours, since evil thrives in the night. However, there’s still a few hunters that stick around after dark, and Fiona stays here now too, but I don’t think it’d be particularly difficult for me to sneak out—especially since Fiona is currently out on a mission with Gold Team that couldn’t wait until morning. The hunters mostly worry about regulating who comes in, not who leaves. Footage of me will probably be caught on cameras somewhere, but I don’t think anyone is going to come out and stop me as long as I get out of here without my babysitter noticing.
I watch the snoring hunter who’s supposed to be watching me for a moment longer before I carefully get off of my bed. The springs in my mattress sound loud like scraping metal, but it doesn’t seem to bother the hunter. I try not to pay attention to the anxiety threatening to flood through my body. Every little sound I makes seems amplified as I crawl out of my bed, get dressed, and pack items into my backpack. I basically have one eye glued to the hunter and the other glued to all the things I’m trying to get done.
If I’m going to be confronted by Arsen, I’m going to be ready for him.
Once I have everything I can get, I quietly haul my backpack onto my back. I have my small silver knife concealed and easily accessible in the custom belt Fiona got me, and I wear my black diamond attached to my silver chain necklace as usual. The plethora of charms and herbs in my backpack all combined should make me unappetizing to most monsters preying on humans, not to mention the fact that I have vervain running through my system. But maybe a demon won’t be deterred. It didn’t stop him from wrecking my house and killing my parents. I wish I was allowed to have my own gun. I’m a good shot, but there’s no way I’m going to risk getting out of here by trying to borrow one.
I shake my head and try not to think about what’s to come. It’ll only make me anxious and stop me from doing what I have to do. I don’t have time to dwell on my fears. I can’t put this off any longer. I have to end this.
As I sneak out the door, past my hunter babysitter still captured in the arms of sleep, I realize that this whole thing has probably worked out for the better. If I’m the only one going out to hunt Arsen, I’m the only one that might get hurt. I can’t let him hurt anyone else. I can’t let him kill anyone else. I can’t see that ever again.
I walk down the halls in my winter coat, prepared for the cold night outside. I keep my hood close around my neck, but I don’t put it over my head. If I did that, I’d end up looking suspicious. All I have to do to get out of here is not to draw attention to myself. As long as no one realizes it’s me, I’ll be fine. I keep a vigilant watch out for any hunters walking the base alongside me.
My fears are unfounded. I don’t run into a single soul, even as I open a door to the outside. Just as I expected, the night is cold. It’s snowing, but the snowflakes are small and the wind is fierce. So instead of the fluffy snowflakes you always see advertised on the Christmas holiday cards, these snowflakes are like little shards of ice that dig into your skin on impact.
I pull my hood over my head and do my best to hide my face from the storm. I walk far away from the base, but I stay among the warehouses. I don’t want to wander into the city because I don’t want to get anyone else involved, so it’s just me and the big abandoned warehouses. All I can hear is the wind howling in my ears and the biting ice burning any exposed skin.
That’s when I start to feel it. That feeling of being watched, a pair of eyes searing two holes into the back of my head. But I know I’m not being watched by just anyone. I don’t know how I know it, but this feeling of power, of foreboding, this feeling that makes me want to shiver out of my skin is from Arsen.
I start checking the doors to the warehouses and find one that isn’t locked. I slip inside to find the place completely gutted with some open windows farther back, letting in more of the cold wind and covering the floor in thin ice. I move to an area without windows and already feel ten times warmer now that the mind numbing wind is no longer buffeting me.
“I know you’re there,” I say as I drop my backpack on the ground. I try to sound convincing, but the shaking in my voice probably makes my fear easy enough to see.
I ease my silver knife from my belt, reminding myself to keep it together. After taking a deep breath, I continue, “It’s just you and me now. Let’s end whatever this thing going on between us is. You’ve been watching me. You killed my parents. You tried to mine Didi for information. I don’t know why, but you want me for something, right? Well, I’m right here. What’s stopping you?”
My hands are trembling so bad I can barely keep my silver knife in my hands. The weapon isn’t going to do me any good if I can’t get a handle on my nerves. I’ve been through combat training during my time at the base. I perform decently now. But this is real! This is dangerous. I’m afraid, and now I wonder if such a small silver knife will even do the job. What was it I learned about demons? It was something Rynne told Fiona, something I learned in one of my classes. Silver harms demons, but to really kill one, you have to carve out their heart and stop it from regenerating. My blood runs cold, and I realize just how unprepared I am.
Rynne. I wish Rynne was here with me. I’m so scared, but if he was here he’d make it all okay. He’d somehow make it all okay. I need his light.
Rynne.
A dark, sensual voice comes from the shadows, “I was hoping you would be the one to give me answers.”
IT’S UNUSUAL FOR BLADE to send us out on a mission late into the night. Along with inhibited visibility, evil thrives in the dark. Daylight has always acted as a shelter for good. Blade always takes advantage of that when she can, but this target is a rare exception.
No one has been able to find where it stays during the day or the night. The only thing we’ve learned from it is its attack pattern. It seems like it’s been making its way through a well to do neighborhood in Philadelphia while draining bodies of blood throughout different parts of the city on the side. It’s been through one house after the next,
based on the fact that everyone in this neighborhood has been “moving,” one after the other. It’s clear that its next target is the next house in line in this neighborhood.
Blade thinks the creature we’re hunting is a vampire. The bodies drained of blood and the people in this particular neighborhood all “moving” abruptly, without taking anything with them, most likely means this monster has turned the people who lived in these homes into thralls, mindless creatures tethered to their creator. Some made demons, and even their offspring, can pass on a piece of the curse they were originally given by forcing a human to consume their blood, but a thrall is something that can no longer think or make decisions. They’re monsters that crave only to feed; however, while their creator is alive, they’ll obey their creator’s wishes. Since thralls can’t think through anything logically, they aren’t good for much, but they can kill as well as the worst of monsters.
The only way to deal with this cleanly is to find the vampire creating these thralls and to convince it to give its thralls the command to kill themselves. That’s the outcome Blade is hoping for, anyway. None of us know how a bond between a vampire and their thralls works exactly.
This vampire is trying to become more powerful. If they can’t do it alone, they’ll do it by building an army. If Imae has taught me anything about demons, it’s to never underestimate them and the things they’ll do for power.
There’s this annoying itch in my hands that won’t go away. The people inside of this house are still human. I’m a soldier. I do what I’m told. Our top priority is to take out this vampire. I’m ready for that, but what doesn’t sit well with me is the fact that we’re basically using this family as bait. My orders are to follow Blade’s orders. She’s set up a perimeter around the house, confident that we’ll be able to take the vampire out like this. I’ve been assigned the front of the house. Without fail, Blade’s been keeping a sharp eye on me. She usually sets me up in places where she’ll be able to watch my every move, or she’ll just assign herself to me. I know she doesn’t trust me. Just like Miguel doesn’t trust me. But lately she has been giving me more freedom, and that’s why I’m stationed by myself tonight.
Hearts Lie (Undying Love, Book 1) Page 23