Learning to Trust

by Cynthia P. O'Neill

  I blushed in embarrassment, unprepared for what he did next. His right hand came up and cupped one side of my face as his other hand reached around the back of my head and pulled the decorative comb from my hair, releasing it to fall down my back. “Your hairstyle today is very sophisticated and works well for the interview and for work; one would definitely take you seriously. However, you look more beautiful with your hair down, flowing freely around your shoulders and back, like you wore it at the pub.”

  My body immediately flushed with heat, stirring something deep inside me. He inspired feelings that I’d never experienced before; he made my nipples tingle and my nether regions ache. My breathing accelerated and my eyes closed, momentarily leaning into the caress of his hand and welcoming his touch. What are you doing, Laurel?

  His face was so close to mine I could feel his breath against my lips. My mind began to wander, imagining his lips on mine, taking me to places I only recently thought about in my dreams. Kiss me! Wait! This is an interview—don’t kiss me! I finally got myself together enough to take a step back, which caused his hand to drop.

  He startled. “I’m sorry,” he said sincerely. “I shouldn’t have overstepped my boundaries and invaded your personal space. I just thought you should know how breathtakingly beautiful you look with your hair down.” He took a deep breath in and, without touching me this time, led me to the door and opened it.

  I stepped through and turned. “Thank you for your time, Garrett. Have a wonderful day.”

  He seemed to be breathing a little heavy, leaving me wondering if he was as affected by me as much as I was by him. “You do the same, Laurel. Don’t forget to give your cousin Evan’s name and number. I’ll go ahead and call him so he knows to expect her call. I’ll be in contact soon to let you know what our decision is.” Then, without warning, he closed the door.

  I didn’t know what was going on between us, but I didn’t care to think about it right now; not when the potential for a job and getting out of this town was within reach.

  Hannah walked into the dorm room as I was finishing up my phone conversation with Grace, who said she’d cross her fingers about the job and call Garrett’s contact. I was hoping and praying that everything would work out for us and she’d get a job in the same town. Living with my cousin would be just the stability for me in a new city.

  “I promise to be careful, Grace,” I assured her. “I know I should be apprehensive around him, but I feel different with him. I don’t understand it, but he somehow calms me and I feel safe with him. Call me if you hear anything and I’ll do the same. Okay. Love you. Bye.”

  Hannah took a seat on her bed and looked at me, puzzled. “Do I even want to know how the interview went? Why are you wearing your hair down? I thought we agreed it would look more professional up.”

  “You’re never going to believe who I ended up interviewing with!” The excitement was evident in my voice; I almost squealed, I was so excited to share.

  “Who? Is it someone we know?”

  “It was him. The guy from the lab, from the pub—that was Garrett Andrews!” I exclaimed. “Garrett Andrews from Bio-Medical Life Solutions!”

  Her jaw dropped open. “No freaking way!”

  “Yes, way…and get this, he was the one who ordered the food and drinks for me. Apparently the waitress overheard all of our conversations at the table and that’s how he was able to figure out what I liked.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.” She shook her head, dumbstruck.

  “I know,” I breathed, feeling a little dreamy. “I felt the same way when I found out. All of you had denied paying for my bill the other night, so I decided to be bold enough and ask if it was him when the interview was over and he admitted it was.”

  “So how did the interview go?” Hannah asked, changing the subject. “Does it look like you might have a job?”

  I knew Hannah was hopeful for me, knowing that if I didn’t find something soon, I’d have to go home and get whatever job I could find in our small town. “I think I did okay. Garrett said that I have a bright future ahead of me, possibly at his company. He even gave me the name and number of a pharmaceutical rep to help Grace find a job in Orlando. He said I came off very professional on all accounts and he loved the whole look you helped put together for me. And then he told me that he prefers to see my hair down.” I was embarrassed to admit the last part.

  She was aghast, her facing turning from interest to concern. “You took your hair down all because he asked you to?”

  “He took my hair down. I know that isn’t appropriate and I’ve already had the lecture from Grace, but I wasn’t frightened around him. I can’t explain it other than he has a soothing, sensual effect on me.”

  She folded her arms across her chest. “I’m not going to pass judgment, Laurel; just be careful around him. Wait a minute, did you just say sensual?”

  “I guess so. He makes my body feel things I’ve never felt before.” I blushed and looked down at the floor. “I wanted to kiss him,” I admitted.

  Hannah looked scandalized. “In an interview, Laurel?!”

  I didn’t know what to say as I watched her pace from one side of the room to the other before finally grabbing hold of my shoulders and staring me in the eyes. “Hey, I’m all for chemistry and total hotness, but an interview isn’t the place for it. I admit he’s easy to look at, but there’s something about the way he’s handling all this that’s a bit creepy.”

  “I know, but…” She put her hand in the air to indicate she wasn’t finished.

  “You’ve been through a lot, Laurel. You’re just starting to come out of your shell and I worry that he might be taking advantage of your naïveté.” She hugged me close. “So, tell me all the details of the interview.”

  I took a seat and tried to explain, in detail, how his legs kept brushing up against mine; how, when seated, he leaned close to talk and ask questions; how his hand touched my back when we walked to the door. “This isn’t normal, is it? I mean, it wasn’t like this with Chase. I feel so strange when Garrett is near me or looking at me or touching me. What’s that all about?”

  Hannah came to sit next to me on my bed and placed one of her hands on mine. “I can’t be certain, since I haven’t seen this guy interact with you, but it sounds like you’re digging one another. I know you’ve been hurt, and as a result you’re confused about what you’re feeling; however, from what you’re telling me, your body seems to be drawn to him.” She smiled. “What you’re experiencing is attraction, honey.” She swiveled her hips to emphasize the point.

  “Hannah!” I was mortified by her movements, turning red instantly. Attraction. Duh. I knew I was naïve, not having dated much in high school and college, and the incident with Chase made it difficult for me to trust any man lately, especially when it came to physical touch. Both Grace and Hannah told me I needed time to heal from my ordeal, but also needed to move forward and replace the bad memories with more pleasant ones. I’d tried dating a couple of times, but any endearment, words or touch, made my skin crawl. It wasn’t the same with Garrett; I was beginning to think that I craved him. Could I really be attracted to him?

  Hannah interrupted my thoughts. “I can read your mind, Laurel, and yes, it’s attraction. If you’d like, I could use a different term, like lust or physical need,” she said, teasing me a bit.

  I shook my head in denial; I was far to messed up to be fascinated with anyone. “Let’s drop this conversation for now.”

  Hannah knew that was my line to let her know I couldn’t handle discussing anything further. I watched as she gathered her purse and headed to the door. “When you feel like talking, let me know. I’m always here for you.” She paused a moment. “Do you need anything at the store? I’m making a quick run for some more shampoo.”

  “No. I’m good. Thanks, Hannah, for everything!”

  To lift my spirits, I decided to change into more comfortable clothes and get something to eat. I had some errands to run a
round campus, namely picking up my graduation gown, and hoped that would distract me from my thoughts.

  The cafeteria had only a handful of occupants. Most of the students and faculty typically came during the lunch rush and with the semester over, many of the students had already headed home for summer break. The quiet room was a welcome sight. I grabbed a small Cobb salad and a water and found a table by the window so I could people watch as I ate.

  My phone rang as I sat down. I was really hungry, but noticed the number was Grace, so decided to answer. “Hey, I didn’t expect to hear from you again so soon.”

  I had to hold the phone away from my ear as she began screaming in excitement. “Oh my God, oh my God, I—I can’t believe this, Laurel!”

  “What is it, Grace? You have me on pins and needles here!” I wasn’t sure whether to be excited or terrified.

  “I talked with Evan Daniels at Waters Pharmaceuticals, the guy Mr. Andrews told you I should call. Well, he asked me to send him an electronic copy of my resume while we were on the phone. He liked what he saw, so he asked me if I’d be willing to do an interview via Skype.” She paused for a moment to take a deep breath.

  My curiosity got the best of me. “Just spill it!”

  “We ended up talking for almost an hour. The conversation was good and we seemed to have a natural rapport with one another. He gave me a couple of scenarios and asked how I’d handle them. It was an interesting challenge, but he ended up liking my insights and ingenuity to resolve the problems.” Grace’s voice began to get higher and higher with her growing excitement.

  “So, did he offer you a position?”

  She squealed with delight. “I got an offer, but was hesitant to accept until I told him everything, so I backed up so the camera caught full sight of my arm.”

  I could feel myself tensing. “Please tell me he wasn’t a douchebag and took back the job offer.”

  “I thought it was going to be a deal breaker, too, but he didn’t budge. He said he admired my honesty and desire to pursue my ambitions in life. He asked when I would be graduating and how quickly I could move down to Orlando and start orientation.”

  “I’m so-o-o-o-o happy for you, Grace! So did you accept? When do you need to move to Orlando?”

  “My graduation is June 1st, so I won’t be able to move until after that. To my surprise, they can wait until then and the offer is almost too good to be true, much better than what I was prepared for. What’s more is that they’re willing to pay to relocate me; I just need to get receipts for everything. Plus, I’ll get an expense account for when I’m traveling to medical conventions. Can you BELIEVE IT?! We’re going to Orlando together!” she squealed, then paused. “I mean, I’m sure we will be. Have you heard anything from Mr. Andrews yet?”

  I sighed; it was too soon, the interview was only a few hours ago. “He said he had to forward the paperwork to the head office for someone to look at it and see which candidate best fit the position they have in mind. It sounded like it would be a couple of days or so before he would be in touch. So I’m going to keep packing and focus on graduation until then.”

  Just then, I caught sight of Garrett sitting at one of the outdoor patio tables having coffee with Dr. Leonard. “Sorry to cut this short, Grace, but I haven’t eaten all day and just sat down to eat lunch when you called.”

  “I’m sorry, Laurel. I just couldn’t wait to share the good news with you. Keeping my fingers crossed that we end up in the same town! Go eat your lunch and we can talk more later, ok? Give me a call when you hear anything. Love you, cousin!”

  “So happy for you and love you, too!” I sighed, just the tiniest bit jealous that Grace had an interview and an offer already today. I ate my lunch and reveled in how quickly a couple of hours could change a person’s life, especially my cousin’s. I was overjoyed for her, but couldn’t help wishing I’d gotten an offer during my interview.

  While I was throwing away my trash, I noticed Dr. Leonard and Garrett standing up from their table and shaking hands before the professor turned and headed the direction of the Bio-Medical Building. Crap. I hoped that I could get out of the cafeteria and make it to the bookstore unnoticed. I had made it out the door and taken about twenty steps before I heard, “Laurel, is that you?” and the sound of footsteps running to catch up to me.

  I stopped in my tracks and allowed him to step in front of me. I smiled, nervous and excited to see him. “Hello, Garrett.”

  He smiled back a quirky little half smile that made my heart melt. “Do you have a moment or were you headed somewhere?”

  “I have a few minutes. I need to get to the bookstore to pick up my cap and gown for the graduation ceremony. Did you have more questions for me?” I prayed they were work-related, not knowing if I could handle any more ‘in-depth’ personal questions.

  Garrett reached out and grabbed one of my hands, placing it firmly between his and sending a strong current radiating through me. Normally I would’ve flinched from the contact, but one look into his eyes and I was captivated. “I don’t have any questions right now,” he said, not looking away from my eyes, “but I do have some news.”

  I could feel myself tense, knowing that I was going to get the “I’m sorry, but we’ve decided to go with someone else for the position” Line. I’d heard the line numerous times over the past few months, and I braced myself for the blow.

  His smile grew larger. “I was going to call you, but I would rather share the good news in person. The head of the company has already reviewed your resume and seen the schematics of your work along with the pictures I forwarded, and he wants me to make you an offer.”

  My free hand quickly caught my mouth in sheer surprise. I shook my head in disbelief, thinking I had misheard him. Holy crap, this company works fast!

  “Are you all right, Laurel?” His face filled with concern.

  “I’m fine,” I said, my voice a bit shaky. “Just going through a variety of feelings, I guess. I’m surprised, excited, happy, and overjoyed.” I was thrilled: I was getting away from here and I’d be able to live with Grace; I knew I’d be safe with her.

  “Are you available to discuss the offer and all the specifics tomorrow night over dinner?” His voice suddenly became very seductive.

  I know Hannah and Grace warned me to take things slowly with all guys and to see what Garrett, especially, was all about. The idea of having dinner with him was a bit unnerving. “We don’t need to do dinner,” I assured him. “I could easily meet you at the office we interviewed in to discuss the offer.”

  He began to pat and soothe the hand he still held. “Our company prefers to take our potential employees out to lunch or dinner to go over the specifics of the offer and to negotiate any terms that need fine tuning. It’s our modus operandi to help make the new hire feel welcome.”

  I instantly breathed a sigh of relief and began to relax. So it’s not a date. “In that case, the answer is yes. Will there be any other new hires at the dinner?”

  He hesitated. “We’re interested in another candidate here. I’ll be giving him a call soon to see if he wants to negotiate an offer. Why?”

  “No reason, just curious.” I felt better with accepting the “strictly business” dinner invitation knowing someone besides Garrett would be present.

  “I’ll make reservations for tomorrow night. My driver, a man named Thompson, will pick you up outside your dorm room. The restaurant’s dress code is Sunday dress, nothing too fancy or casual. Would 6:30 work for you?”

  “The time is fine, though there’s no need for a driver. I could easily borrow my roommate’s car.” I felt uneasy about having some unknown shuffling me around town.

  His body tensed and his face scowled with my decline for transportation. I noticed his body shift into a more commanding position, which, to my surprise, put me more at ease. He stared deeply into my eyes, as if he was daring me to refuse again. “Nonsense. Why leave your roommate without a car for the night when I have a driver at my disposal?
Thompson will pick you up at 6:30 and we’ll have dinner at 7 sharp!”

  He was right. I hadn’t even considered whether Hannah would need the car or not. What was it about his eyes and the way he took command of things that made me give into him? “Okay, Garrett. 6:30 it is.”

  A smile spread quickly across his face, knowing he defeated my objections. He lifted my hand towards his lips, giving it a quick kiss. “Until tomorrow, Laurel,” he said, giving me a wink and walking away.

  My heart was racing and my hand was overwhelmingly warm from where his lips met my skin. Every synapse in my brain was firing, wondering how he was able to have such an effect on me. What the hell was I thinking?! Letting him kiss my hand! This was definitely inappropriate, but it felt so right.

  I took a deep breath and instantly texted Grace that I have an offer on the table and would talk with her soon. I tried to continue about my day as normally as possible. I picked up my graduation cap and gown, which fit perfectly, and spent the rest of the day trying on everything in my closet in an attempt to find an outfit for graduation and my business dinner.

  I glanced nervously at the clock. It was only five; I had another agonizing hour and a half to wait and I could feel every second of the clock ticking in time with the frantic beats of my heart. It was hard to believe that in just two short hours, I would be having dinner with Garrett, discussing my future and negotiating my career. My mind was trying to process everything and not sure which area I should be most afraid of.

  I had a Skype session with Grace last night to tell her the news about us both going to Orlando for work. While we were chatting, Hannah returned and I asked both their opinions regarding what I should wear for tonight’s dinner. Thankfully the last time my mother visited, we went shopping in anticipation of graduation and bought two dresses.

  I held up the first one, my favorite because it felt safe. It was knee-length and a gorgeous cerulean blue with a cowl neckline that modestly accentuated my endowments. The dress was long-sleeved with slits along both the upper and lower arm and decorated with gold buckles and buttons along the shoulders and sleeves. Hannah was quick to find a nice pair of four-inch strappy white heels and purse to match. Grace suggested wearing the dangly gold earrings she had given me for my last birthday, along with my favorite heart necklace from my parents’ to complete the look. We thought it was perfect for the dinner with Garrett—professional and a little bit sexy.