by T. K. Chapin
My phone rang—it was Luke.
“No, don’t say it!” I demanded.
“She’s about to push. Are you almost here?”
The tears broke and the pain of not being with my daughter became too much to handle.
“What’s wrong?”
“Really? We’re broke down on the side of the road and my daughter is going to push out little Kip without me there! That’s what’s wrong, Luke! That’s what’s wrong! Let me talk to her, please.”
He gave the phone to her.
“Mom? I’m okay. Luke’s here, and everyone is very nice.”
My eyes watered. “Everything is going to be okay. I know we didn’t see this coming, but—”
“God did.” She had finished my sentence in a different direction than I was going.
“You’re right, He did. I’m going to get up there soon. I promise.”
“It’s okay, Mom. I know everything is going to work out.” She paused, letting out a painful breath. “Ouch! Here’s Luke!”
Luke came back on the phone. “I’d better get off here.”
My breathing in short spurts, I said, “Okay. Take care of my little girl.”
Tossing my phone on the seat, I got out of the truck and ventured down the side of the road and out a few yards into the frost-covered field nearby. My heart was heavy, and my eyes couldn’t stop the continuous flow of tears running down my cheeks.
“Why, God? Why?”
I looked up at the stars hanging in the night sky as hopelessness filled me. “I try to do what You want me to do and the worst possible thing just keeps happening! Maybe Mac was right. Maybe You don’t care.” Immediately, I took it back. “I’m sorry, Lord. I am at the end of myself and I cannot fathom what is going on.”
A verse surfaced to my heart, one from Proverbs. His ways are not our ways.
Nodding, peace began to fill me, the peace of God. The storm raging in my soul quieted as I prayed, and the peace grew.
Another piece of Scripture came to me.
Be still and know that I am God.
My heart was hurting, but I had the peace of the Lord and the joy of the Lord within me.
Chapter 39-Luke
WIDE-EYED AND SLIGHTLY LIGHTHEADED, I took the newborn baby into my hands from the doctor who handed him to me. They had let me cut the cord. The experience was a surreal moment. I never felt emotional hearing a baby cry before, but his first breath of air, the first cry of his life, had me in tears. Holding him now, I felt like I could break him if I made an unexpected movement. My heart raced as my eyes watered, looking at the new life in my hands. A brand-new, tiny life. Moving closer to Kayla, I handed him to her and she pulled him onto her chest.
She beamed with a smile like I had never seen before on her face. Gently brushing her fingertips across his eyes, she leaned in and kissed his forehead.
I had never been in a delivery room before. Sure, I had visited the hospital when Victor’s wife had their three kids, but I hadn’t dreamed of being there in the delivery room. I used to dream of it, though, under different circumstances, of course. I dreamed of the day Pamela would give birth to a child, but that dream died long ago.
The doctor and the nurses moved around the room with purpose, one of the nurses taking the baby to go clean him up.
As the room cleared, I came close to Kayla. “You’re going to be an amazing mom, I can already tell.”
She smiled, then it fell away as she looked toward the window in the room. “He is amazing, and I love him more than I love myself already. I can’t wait until my mom sees him. Where is she?”
“She’s on her way.” Though I didn’t know how true that statement was, I knew she’d be there soon, one way or another.
“How’s Mac?”
My heart dipped into my stomach at the sound of my father’s name and the look in her eyes. I knew she cared about him deeply. There wasn’t an easy way to break the news to her about Mac’s most likely fate, so I neglected to inform her.
“I’ll go find out now that you’re done delivering. If that’s cool?”
“Please do. The nurses are here for me and my son.”
Taking my leave from the labor and delivery floor, I headed down to the E.R. to go find out if my father had passed away. Though I couldn’t know for certain, my gut told me he was already gone. Finding the receptionist desk, I approached.
“He’s in room 24 in ICU. Down the hall to the right.”
Surprised to hear that he was still alive, I raised an eyebrow. “Okay.”
Coming to the doorway of my dad’s room, I peeked in. The room was dimly lit, machines and monitors all around his bed keeping him alive. Then there, in the midst of the darkness and the one small light that hung above the hospital bed, I saw the faint outline of my brother, Victor. He was sitting beside the bed in a chair. He was holding one of our father’s hands in both of his.
I entered the room.
“Brother.”
He stood up and walked over to me, immediately throwing his arms around my neck. We hugged.
“He’s going to die, brother. Our dad’s going to die. They said the machines are the only thing keeping him alive, and we both know his feelings on machines.”
“I know.” My tone was somber, matching my brother’s level.
“What happened?” Victor asked, glancing over at our dad.
“Betsy happened. Kayla told me in the car that they were down by the creek, talking and catching up after Mac’s trip, as she had become too warm in the guest house, and he ran inside to grab a refill on their hot cocoa when she screamed. He ran outside and jumped in front of Betsy just as she was about to pounce.”
Victor covered his mouth as he peered over at his dad. “He gave his life up for her.”
I nodded.
Then we cried and embraced again.
Chapter 40-Hannah
AN UBER RIDE, GENEROUSLY PAID for by Mikey, got me to the hospital. I knew it was too late, but at least I had made it. Hurrying inside, I went straightway to the Labor and Delivery floor of Deaconess.
When I turned the corner and came into the room, I saw my daughter holding her son. All the worry and pain of the difficulties prior to right then melted away.
“Aww . . .” I said, approaching her bed.
She smiled over at me. “He’s perfect, Mom.”
My eyes watered, and I agreed with a nod. Kayla handed him to me to hold.
Taking little Kip into my hands, my heart warmed. “Hi, little guy. I’m your grandma. Sorry I was late, but I promise I will be better in the future!”
Looking at my daughter while I was holding my grandson, I couldn’t think of a better moment in my life. This was truly a moment of one of the purest forms of love, a moment created by God. In a world full of so much pain and hurt, moments in which everything seems right in the world are not only rare, but divine in nature. I praised God and thanked Him.
“Your boyfriend is amazing, Mom. You have to marry him.”
I laughed, breaking myself out of the moment, and looked up at her. “Yeah? Where is he?”
“Went to find out more info on Mac. I hope he’s okay. It was so heroic what he did. He jumped in front of the bear and shoved it away.”
“What on earth were you thinking, being outside forty weeks pregnant anyway, Kayla?”
“I was hot, really hot. And the heartburn, ugh, I just had to get out of the guest house. And I needed to hear about Mac’s trip. I missed him. I hope he’s okay. Mac is a good man and means a lot to me.”
“I hope so also. He really came around from the grump we met.”
“He really did.”
We visited for a while more until Luke came into the room. He only stood in the doorway but didn’t enter. Turning to him, I saw his eyes were puffy, red, and swollen. Something was wrong with Mac. I knew it.
“I’ll be back,” I said to Kayla and leaned over to her to kiss her forehead.
Walking out into the hallway to talk with
Luke, I turned the corner and immediately, he hugged me tightly.
“Mac’s going to die, Hannah. We’re pulling the plug tomorrow morning at seven.”
My heart jerked. “Seriously?”
Releasing from our embrace, he nodded. Wiping his eyes, he said, “It’s in his will not to be on life support. He’s always hated the idea of machines keeping him alive, and the doctors said it’s the only way.” His eyes glanced over my shoulder. “Should we tell her? Or is it too soon?”
I paused for a long time, debating it within me. “Yes, it’ll be hard for her, but she should get the chance to say something before he goes. If that’s okay with you and Victor.”
“Yeah, that’s totally understandable. She’s the reason I got a chance to see my dad happy again. Be there tomorrow morning around six thirty, and we’ll all say something.”
His face was downcast. He looked sad. Taking a step closer to him, I lifted his cheeks between my hands.
“You did amazing by staying with Kayla. Thank you.”
Leaning up on my toes, I kissed his cheek.
He took a step closer to me and brought his hand up to my cheek, and he leaned in, then kissed me.
Warmth sizzled over my entire body.
We stopped kissing and he peered into my eyes.
“I’m sorry for not doing that sooner.”
“You’re forgiven.”
We both smiled.
“I felt incredibly blessed to be there for Kayla today. A once in a lifetime opportunity since I can’t have kids. By the way, I can’t have children. I failed to mention that last summer when we were getting close, and I’m sorry about it. I understand if you don’t want to be with someone like that. Kids are pretty important.”
Shock poured through me at first, but then a calmness I knew that could only come from God led me to speak the words that came from my lips. “I have a darling daughter, and now a grandson. I don’t want more children, and if that changes, there’s always adoption. Right now, I just want you, Luke. If you’ll have me—well, all of us, really. I come as a package deal.”
“It’s all I’ve wanted since I’ve laid eyes on you. That’s the truth!”
“Speaking of truth, I need to be honest with you. Your job taking you out of town freaked me out last summer. I can’t promise I’ll be fine with that even now, but I want to trust you. I really do, and it's not fair to hold Jonathan's trespasses against you.”
“I understand.” He grabbed my hands in his as he continued. “You were hurt, and I’ll do whatever you need me to do to make you more comfortable with the trips. Call you in the evenings when I’m out of town, maybe even bring you with me. Of course, you can have your own separate hotel room, but whatever you need.”
“That’s sweet, but it’s not fair to you. You shouldn’t have to deal with my being insecure when you did nothing wrong.”
He smiled. “If that’s what you need to be more comfortable and for us to work, I’m more than willing to give it to you.”
I was overwhelmed by his affection for me and I kissed him again. A baby’s cry broke the romantic spell between us.
“Hey, Kayla doesn’t want that soup, if you’re hungry. It’s made with the veggies from the garden.”
“Sounds good. I’m famished. Once I get done with the soup, I’m heading back to my dad.”
“Of course.”
Walking back into Kayla’s hospital room, he placed his arm around the small of my back and welcomed tremors of pleasure traveled up my back.
Chapter 41-Luke
VICTOR, MYSELF, HANNAH, Kayla, and even little Kip all crowded around my father’s bedside early the next morning. We all said a small something, but it was Kayla’s that was the most heart-wrenching of them all.
With tears streaming down her face and her baby in her arms, she spoke. “I’m naming him Mac instead of Kip, and that’s because I want him to have your name. In only six and a half months of knowing you, you showed me what the love of a father really means. It wasn’t biological, or even step, but it was by choice that you loved me like a daughter. You had every reason in the world to show me hate. I was sixteen and pregnant and naïve, and yet you took the time to sit with me. Took the time to talk and listen.”
My heart couldn’t help but cleave toward desiring my father to stay alive longer. I never knew him the way Kayla did, and I hurt more for her loss than I did my own.
She continued to speak after pausing to wipe tears.
“You weren’t like my father to me. You actually cared. You would listen to me go on and on about how stupid Matt was, but you’d always be sure to tell me what you thought after I got done talking.” She laughed, prompting the rest of us in the room to laugh. Grabbing hold of his hand, she leaned in closer. “You were the father I never had, and I’ll never forget you. I believe God’s love showed through you daily, and I want my son to grow up and be the man I know you are, Mac. I know you’re happier now, with Rita, so I’ll try not to cry so much down here. But instead, I’ll remember all the good. I love you, Mac. Thank you for more than you’ll ever know.”
The doctors and nurses came into the room a few minutes later and began the process of shutting down the machines. Overwhelming sadness tore through me and I stepped out into the hallway. Leaning my back against the wall, I looked up at the tiled ceiling of the hospital hallway and prayed for God to help me.
A few moments later, Hannah appeared in the hall.
“He gone?”
She didn’t speak, but she frowned and I knew.
Touching my arm, she said, “He’s with Jesus now, Luke. At least we can take comfort in that fact.”
She came closer and leaned in, wrapping her arms around me.
Lifting my arms, I embraced her and wept. Losing my father was difficult, but having Hannah there brought a measure of comfort to my soul.
Chapter 42-Hannah
SIX MONTHS LATER, IT WAS June, and Luke and I decided to extend the size of the garden. I had since moved out of the guest house and into the main living quarters, letting Kayla and Mac live in the guest house so I didn’t try to control her every mothering task. Kayla and little Mac walked the short distance daily to see me and had all their meals with me too. She had grown up a lot since having Mac. Babies tended to do that to a person, no matter the age. Mac had left the house to Kayla in his will.
We had already tilled a huge lot of ground and put up a fence to keep deer out last weekend, and this weekend, we were planting seeds. Halfway through the afternoon, we took a break. We sat with sweat pouring from our brows as we downed bottles of water feet away from the garden.
Getting up from the place I was sitting, I came over to him and sat on his lap. Putting my arms around him, I looked into his eyes and planted a kiss on his lips.
“What’s that for?” he asked.
“It’s for you being you. Even when you’re covered in sweat and dirt, you’re still cute.”
“Yeah? Well you look like a hot mess.”
Playfully smacking him, I said, “Jerk.”
He laughed, then I laughed. A second passed and then he leaned in, nibbling lightly at my neck. Then he moved up to my lips and kissed me.
Suddenly, Kayla came out of the guest house with Mac in his car seat, and I rolled out of Luke’s lap so it wouldn’t be weird.
“Good progress, you two!” Kayla smiled at us as she walked toward our old car that Luke had fixed up for her. “I’m going out with Alex. We’re taking Mac to a park and then going to a youth group thing over at the pizza parlor.”
“What can a baby do at a park?” I asked. “Plus, it looks like it might rain.”
She laughed. “I’ll bring a coat. As far as what he’ll do . . . I think he likes seeing and hearing the other kids.”
“All right, dear. Be home by seven.”
“I know. Do you work tomorrow? Mac has an appointment.” After Mac had passed away, I found a job at a retirement community. It was hard work, but very rewarding and on
ly a short drive into Newport.
“No, I’m off today and tomorrow.”
“Okay, great.”
She got herself and the baby into the car, then drove off. Luke had his gaze locked on the sky and the clouds hanging above us. He looked to be deep in thought.
Touching his shoulder, I wanted to know what was going on in his head. “Tell me exactly what you’re thinking right now.”
He smiled and turned to me. “Marry me?”
It began to rain.
My heart overwhelmed with joy, and as rained soaked me, I kissed him.
Two words, one phrase that contained the power to change lives. Words that shape entire lives and words that can bring a grown man to his knees. They are words that, when brought together, can bring immense joy or a deep sorrow to the soul. When Luke uttered those very two words, a little over a year after meeting and six months after we started dating, I knew all of our lives were about to change again.
The End.
Dear Reader,
I hope you enjoyed When It Rains by T.K. Chapin, and that it encouraged you in your own personal walk with the Lord. You’ll find further inspiration and encouragement on The Potter’s House Books website, and by reading the other books in the series. Read them all and be encouraged and uplifted!
Find all the books on Amazon and on The Potter’s House Books website.
Book 1: The Homecoming, by Juliette Duncan
Book 2: When It Rains, by T.K. Chapin
Book 3: Heart Unbroken, by Alexa Verde
Book 4: Long Way Home, by Brenda S Anderson
Book 5: Promises Renewed, by Mary Manners
Book 6: A Vow Redeemed, by Kristen M. Fraser
Book 7: Restoring Faith, by Marion Ueckermann
Books 8 – 21 to be announced
Did you enjoy the book?
Leave A Review!
Book Previews
Love’s Return (Click/Tap here to view on Amazon)