He runs his hand over my hip, tracing the crease of my leg, before inching his finger under my panties and sliding it inside me. My knee buckles, but he holds me up. "What are you doing? I'm sweaty and gross and someone may catch us," I whisper, pulling away from his lips.
"Let me in, beautiful. I want to be inside of my girlfriend." That word makes my heart rate speed up.
I look side to side, searching for someone to be around. I hear a female laugh back toward the trail, and then talking, but every few words becomes more distant. "Someone will see."
He adds another finger. My eyes close. "Who? A small, wandering animal?"
"What's gotten into you?" He's tormenting me with his fingers. "Don't you want to wait till we have a bed and shower?"
"You called yourself my girlfriend and you referenced something a real life couple would do. It just hit me. I liked it a hell of a lot more than I thought I would." His thumb presses against my clit and I'm done.
"Okay, boyfriend, okay. Just don't stop making me feel good. If I smell like sweat, I warned you ahead of time."
"Fuck, I love hearing you say that."
He pulls his fingers out of me and sinks to his knees in front of me. I look down at him when he grabs my shorts by the waistband and starts to pull them down, just after my leg returns to the ground. "No, Saxton. I need a shower. I agreed to play. I did not agree to your nose being front row to my sweaty places. Seriously, just put it in before we get caught."
He looks up at me. "I want to try you in every form."
My shorts hit my ankles and he grabs the back of my calf, pulling my foot out of the hole, and then places it on his shoulder. I feel sticky and this is uncomfortable, but as his lips kiss mine over my clit, my worries disappear and the way he feels on me becomes the only thought. My head falls back against the tree as his tongue presses between my lips and then assaults my clit in the most amazing way. "Oh my..."
I press my forearm to my mouth to silence myself and grab his hair with the other hand, pulling it. I’ve come to love when he goes down on me. That feels so good. Perfect spot, the right speed, and his warm tongue rubbing against me sends me into a quick orgasm. The sensitivity replacing the pleasure causes me to drop my leg before I want to.
He pulls me down to his height and turns me around quickly. More voices sound out in the distance, making me nervous. "Hands and knees, baby."
I do as told, positioning myself. I look over my shoulder to him pulling down his shorts to his thighs. He's ready to go. For some reason, that's such a turn on. He grips my hip with one hand and his dick in the other, placing it at my entrance. He stares into my eyes as he pushes inside of me. "Shit, that feels good."
It still hurts the first time he enters me. It steals my breath for a moment, but I deal with it, because the feeling that comes after makes it worth it. When I feel his pelvis flush with my butt, I bite my tongue to keep quiet. I can feel him in my abdomen. It makes my entire body tense. "I'm sorry, baby. I don't like hurting you."
His hand touches the center of my back, before mirroring the one on my hip. He pulls back slowly, and then pushes all the way inside. My back arches and my hands clench the ground. My head turns straight as he begins to find a rhythm. He bends over and kisses between my shoulder blades.
He runs his hand beneath my tank top and slips it under my bra to cup my breast. I love when he touches my boobs, especially when he rubs my nipple like he's doing now. "Can I go faster," he asks beside my ear.
"Yes," I whisper, preparing myself.
He straightens and grips each hip in his hand, then he thrusts in and out of me harder and faster. I pull forward each time he hits inside of me from the sudden jolt of pain. "Look at me, baby."
I do as he says. "I want to see you when I come." He hits inside again, causing me to bite my bottom lip. He pushes my shirt up my body until it sits crinkled above my breasts. "Just like that."
A slapping sound occurs against my rear and his abs ripple as they contract. When he pulls out again he grips his dick and then I watch as he comes on my lower back, each spurt hitting a different spot, and painting my back in white. "Damn, I wish I didn't have to pull out," he says in a husky tone.
He stands and pulls his shorts back up. I remain in my position, waiting patiently for him to do something. He slides my shorts off the other foot and takes my panties, wiping them across my back, cleaning me. He helps me up and hands me my shorts. "You better be glad my shorts have built in underwear and I just prefer real panties. At this rate I'm not going to have any left."
I step into them and pull them up my legs. He's smiling at me as he shoves the balled up panties in his shorts pocket. "That's one thing I don't mind spending money on, baby."
I adjust my tank and he pulls me into his arms, laying a brief kiss on my lips. "I'm sorry I practically pounced on you. You evoke that side of me. I feel like I've known you so much longer than I actually have. I promise we're almost to the top."
The mountain. I totally forgot. I look up at him as I wrap my hands around his waist, our fronts pressed together. “It's okay. I like that you want me. It kind of just feels like we lost touch instead of recently met.”
"Want is a mild form of what it is. A week might not be that easy."
"Don't remind me. You're the one that made that stupid rule."
"I'm just giving you time to miss me." He winks and then kisses my forehead. "One week and then I'm not letting you out of my sight for a month. Come on. We're so close."
The weird part of that statement is that I already do, and I've not even left him yet. I just hope he misses me, because my heart is falling hard for someone it shouldn't. Deep down I keep reminding myself of what he does. When he's free from this project between us, he goes back to other women. He’s only mine for a little while. That's when this modern day fairytale will end. I know it's coming. If I say it over and over again, maybe my heart will fly away before it's caught...
That's what I'm counting on.
A girlfriend. It's been a long time since I've said that phrase, even to myself. At first it was just being caught up in the moment. I hardly meant it in terms of a label. It was more of a form of courtship. This mock relationship is becoming more and more real before cameras even begin recording, but the thing is, when she acted so normal about us, a buried part inside of me was recovered.
I've lived for so long now shamed from my family and closest friends that it became normal to me, and in turn I even repelled those things. No one can openly accept what I do. It becomes a moral dilemma, and no matter what shit they are doing in their own lives, they always choose judgment because my sins are more open than theirs. Not her though. She mentioned taking me with her as if my background doesn't bother her at all. In that exact moment her being my real life girlfriend just seemed ideal. I want her. I'd be lying to myself if I said otherwise.
Her embarrassment following was the icing on the cake. For the first time she looked at me like a fan hanging out with a star. Her innocence hooked me, but her beautiful, bold personality in her moments of comfort keeps me interested. She is my lamb. Holding her purity inside of me is one thing that's going to be hard to leave behind when it's time to move on to another project, so for now, I'm taking full advantage of every second I can get to know her.
When I'm gone...I want her to remember me. The man I want her to remember is the Saxton I used to be. I want her to think of the man she would introduce as her boyfriend to her friends, and not the guy she keeps a secret because of how loosely I use my dick. She gave me a part of her she can never give to anyone else, and in turn, I want to give her a beautiful memory to go with it. It's the least I can do, since I can never give her what she's given me. In those brief moments that I can feel how I affect her, I really wish I could.
As we near the top of the mountain I stop. She runs into me not paying attention. "Dang it. I'm sorry. My feet got ahead of my brain. I am ready to be at the end."
I turn as she rambles. "Close you
r eyes."
"What? Why? Nothing can surprise me after earlier."
"Humor me."
Her bare shoulders drop. "Fine," she huffs as she closes her eyes.
I walk around her to stand at her back, and then place my hands over her eyes to make sure she isn't peeking. "Follow my lead."
"Um, it's not like I've never seen the Hollywood sign. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were trying to woo me so you can get into my pants. You west coast boys are different."
I smile with my mouth pressed into her blonde hair, just outside of her ear. "We aren't as forgettable. By the way, I'll always try to get in your pants. That place is paradise, baby."
I inch forward, guiding her a little further. She grabs ahold of my wrists to keep herself steady. The fence running behind the letters comes into view. As it does my heart starts to accelerate, slamming against my chest. I haven't been here since I was a kid. My parents brought me once. Don't even really remember it. When I moved to LA, coming back here wasn't something I wanted to do. Seemed pointless to do it alone.
I stop when I reach the fence line between two letters so that she can see better. "Why are you breathing hard?"
"Because you're making me nervous. I can't see."
"I thought you trusted me."
"I do. It's not like I'm used to this sort of thing. Cut me some slack."
I temporarily close my eyes. She doesn't really realize how much her phrases over her lack of experience make me want her more; the total opposite of what I always thought. I guess it's really true about men. We're territorial, animalistic, and once we mark our territory we will fight to keep others out. I suppose that is one thing that really hasn't changed since the Paleolithic period.
"Open your eyes, Kambry."
I drop my hands and replace them around her waist, waiting for a sign to confirm she's done as I've asked. She remains silent, but places her hands on the fence and clenches them through the holes. She pulls toward it and I follow, taking a step forward as she does. I wait, for what seems like forever. "Kambry?"
"I've never seen anything like it," she whispers. "Nothing I say will explain the way I feel."
"It's pretty awesome, isn't it?"
"I'm sure it's not that great to someone that's been here time and time again, but this is really breathtaking, and honestly I've never understood that phrase before now."
"Actually I've only been here once. I was little, so this is really like the first time, but even if I had, I'm pretty sure this would still top all the rest."
She turns around, her hands moving behind her, waist high, gripping the fence once again. Her face is serious, her lips slightly puckered, the top one sitting over the bottom one. My hands move to the fence over her head like hers just were, gripping onto it with each hand forming a claw. We stare at each other. I'm not sure if anyone else is around, and I don't really care. "Can I ask you something at risk of sounding like an immature girl?"
"Yeah, and I'll answer, at risk of sounding like a cheesy guy."
She bites her bottom lip in a smile. It's contagious, spreading to mine. "Do you think this will change when we're in front of cameras? Like will it be forced? The way we are, because I don't want it to change. I like this Saxton. I want to hang out with the guy that gets drunk with me and gropes me in the pool, the guy that catches me in my most embarrassing moments, the guy that does inappropriate things to me in the parking lots of liquor stores, and also the guy that has enough respect for me to take my virginity in a bed when it's just us, but most importantly, I want to hang out with the guy that gets turned on when I'm referred to as his girlfriend and attacks my body in the woods, just before he shows me the world's most beautiful places, making my life more exciting one day at a time."
I say nothing. Instead, my hormones take the lead and I crush my lips to hers, kissing her heatedly. She allows me to. I clench the fence as our tongues tangle, stopping myself. I tighten my closed eyes, leaving my lips pressed against hers.
I grab her hand and press it over the left side of my chest, just before parting our mouths. "I can't promise anything after we're done with filming, but as long as we're together I promise this can't be changed."
She nods. My heart is pounding. I feel like I've just snorted a line of that fine, white powder. I don't like the open-ended answer, but it's an honest one, and honesty is a good start...
I stare at my packed bags sitting in the middle of the floor. It seems surreal it's already been a week since we went to see the Hollywood sign - a long week at that. Saxton texts me twice a day since he dropped me off, after our...adventure: once in the morning and once at night, for about twenty minutes. I haven't heard his voice in a full week, and it's killing me slowly. My finger has hovered over the call option of his name so many different times, but I've refrained. It's been hard.
The real summer has ended; at least in my book. Some would still call this summer depending on what part of the country you live in, or the person’s preference, but to me August is the beginning of fall, hot or not. It's when a lot of schools begin, the leaves are preparing to start changing in color, and things like football begin. Yep, we are entering into Kambry's fall. By October I'm comfortably living in the land of Autumn dreams, where oranges and yellows are at their peaks, and standing just outside the door of winter wonderland.
My life is so different than what I thought it would be. I'm nearing my nineteenth birthday and it's nothing like I always pictured. I thought I'd be moving in dorms, scheduling classes, and starting college, but I guess things aren't as we always imagine they will be. I kind of saw myself as a sorority girl. Something about parties, sisterhood, and four years packed with fun filled events appealed to me.
Well, you're steering quite far away from that dream, aren't you, Kambry?
Instead, I'm about to find out what it's like to bare my body for the world, ready or not. I'm just hoping that he takes that thought away, because I have a confession. I watched a porno from start to finish; however, it wasn't one of his. I just can't watch him with another girl that way, but I did want to see what I'm about to get myself into; what I'm really about to wake up in the middle of, because I'm not naive. Okay, maybe I am, but I know that the sweet, level one kink we've done is not what I'll have to do, so I kind of surfed the adult channels late Friday night and then hit purchase on the one that appealed to me the most. It's a good thing we pay for the cable bill and utilities instead of Meredith's mom. That would be an embarrassing conversation.
Let's just say...I now know what anal beads are used for. I watched with my hand over the channel button, the volume down low, and constantly looking over my shoulder for her to wake up and enter, but no matter how uncomfortable I got I still couldn't change that channel. I was turned on. I fear that the second I hear a moan I will visualize his strong hands pressing them into her anus one bead at a time. My cheeks clench together at the remembrance of her as she took them...from behind.
Then there were the famous come moments, like when he blew his load all over her vajayjay, but not in it. It was a little confusing. I'm not sure the point in that. They are swimmers, right? The part that made me blush the most, as well as the most uncomfortable, was when he used her cleavage to encase his dick and came all over her mouth and face. It seemed so demeaning, yet I was still turned on. Cum to the face... I don't know. Will that be me?
Maybe I should try not to screw up a blowjob first... He's so big though. With no experience in dick judging I know that. Will I be able to pull it off without embarrassing myself? I want to. I press my legs together. Now is not the time to get turned on.
I've done everything I agreed to do. The entire week I've only worked one shift at the club, which was harder than I thought, because boredom set in really quick. It was a scheduling arrangement that was made by Michael and the owner. I had no control over it; however, the one night I worked I disliked the conversation with Drake. He called me into his office to go over the changes, but when we fini
shed I sat and watched while he stared at me for quite a while, before he finally spoke again.
Then, it became a lecture I would expect from my brother if he knew what I was doing and actually gave a damn, but I haven't spoken to him since I left that night. It saddens me that we aren't as close as we once were, before he went off to college three years ago. If he would remove his head from my dad's ass he would realize we aren't close anymore, but because he's living it up at the school of his dreams he doesn't have a clue what I have to go through with our parents. It's a common story of the boys getting to do whatever with Daddy-O patting them on the backs while the girl in the family is sheltered to no end. To hell with double standards.
Regardless of the awkward educational lecture about my reputation, I put my big girl panties on as I tell myself so often and assured Drake I knew what I was doing. I hope I'm right. No regrets. Life is too short for that. That's the exact reason I threw everything I knew out the window and moved here with Meredith. It's not easy being cut off from your parents financially, but that was a sacrifice I was willing to make to be happy. It’s a big one too, because I miss my car more than anything. Mom’s hand me down Toyota Avalon was better than not having one. I sigh. I have to believe I know what I'm doing.
My mind wanders back to the woods from the dirty memories floating around in my mind; like cum… Which leads me to another memory from the many I've made this past week. I saw a gynecologist for the first time in my entire life. Talk about embarrassing. I actually had to put my feet in stirrups. I thought that was a myth. It's not.
As I laid there half naked on that table, my knees were quickly pried open and my bottom pulled to the edge while I had things that were cold and metal shoved inside me, along with dainty glove-covered fingers. My very newly used lady hole was spread wide with the torture device. Scraping of the insides occurred. There was petroleum jelly used. Boob squeezing also took place. My abdomen became a temporary stress ball. Not sure what that was for.
Sex Sessions: Uncut (Camera Tales #1) Page 22