Fate Fixed

by Bonnie Erina Wheeler

  Lexie fit right in with Theo and Brooke and found they helped each day pass by without any embarrassing

  moments.

  She stil missed Liz and the ease of their shared memories, but Lexie was able to send her a letter – updating her on the apparent

  grounding and other transitional stressors. She hoped her friend was having a great first week of school in Torrington, with al of her other childhood friends.

  She doodled on the cover of her binder in her honor’s

  English class. As her teacher proclaimed the bril iance of Shakespeare, Lexie’s mind thought solely of Torin. She had seen him twice in a week and it wasn’t enough.

  How could she have such strong feelings for a guy she

  hardly knew? Perhaps there was such thing as love at first sight, although she didn’t know if she could truly cal it that when she had been dreaming of him for a year. Was it magic or maybe a gift from her dad? None of it made

  sense. Liz would know if I could only ask her.

  Torin – his name kept entering her thoughts so she

  scribbled it over and over. What did he do al day long while she was in school? He graduated already, was he in

  col ege? She knew so little about him but felt as though she had always known him. She giggled to herself, it was a paradox.

  She glanced up at Theo who was grinning at her artwork.

  He raised his eyebrows, giving her a knowing look. Lexie smiled and returned to her musings. She knew she was acting like a thirteen year-old with a first crush. She couldn’t control herself.

  Torin was even hotter than Jared Leto and she didn’t think that was humanly possible.

  His name danced around her head, she kept imagining him waiting for her outside in the parking lot. A passionate feeling trickled through her at the thought of kissing him again.

  She craved Torin and just be alone with him for once. No brothers condemning, no friends observing – just Torin and her alone.

  Before Lexie even realized what she was doing, she

  col ected her books and stood. Mrs. Bomar’s expression was puzzled, “Are you okay dear?”

  Lexie glanced towards the door, “I’m heading to the nurse’s office.” Looking down, she saw Theo stifling his laughter.

  She gave his chair a light kick – already he knew her too wel .

  As she fled the classroom and down the hal , his name kept swirling through her thoughts, beckoning her to find him.

  With her things clutched to her chest, she bypassed the main office and left straight out the entrance’s double doors.

  At the end of the walkway, Torin leaned against the flagpole waiting for her. His rich brown hair swept against his familiar face. She tried taking in every detail of him: his beautiful eyes, his muscled build in a black t-shirt and low-slung jeans, even his feet – crossed at the ankle. She glided forward, swept up in the surreal experience of

  finding him.

  “You’re here,” she said.

  Cocking his head to the side, he smiled. “I was hoping someone would tel you I was out here.”

  Lexie glanced around, she didn’t think anyone even knew she was out there, let alone him. “I was thinking of you.”

  A lot.

  He stroked the side of her face, “I was thinking of you.”

  He reached into his pocket and pul ed out a Nokia phone.

  “Take this. My number is programmed in – now you can cal me.”

  “I can’t,” she felt overcome by his thoughtfulness. “It is so nice – but I couldn’t repay you.”

  He closed his hands around hers, shifting the cel into her palm. “You can repay me by spending the day with me.”

  Lexie realized his mood was much more serious than she had witnessed before. “Okay.”

  Torin walked her to the parking lot where a blue and black Yamaha dirt bike sat in the shade. His sudden smile put her at ease.

  “Are you okay riding on this with me?” he asked.

  Lexie felt a tinge of adrenaline shoot through her. The idea was kind of thril ing. She just nodded.

  Before Torin slipped the hulking helmet over her head, he bent forward and gave her a meaningful kiss on the lips.

  His face lingered next to hers for a moment, and he

  whispered, “I’ve missed you.”

  Pul ing away, he stuffed her binder into the bike’s saddle bag. He straddled the tal bike and the engine reverberated to life. With a confident smile, he reached his hand out and helped her get situated behind him. Lexie wrapped her

  arms snugly around his waist, pressing herself into his strong back. She breathed in his wonderful scent, a mixture of sweet clover honey and cinnamon. It didn’t matter where he was taking her or how livid Maxim would be when he

  discovered she left school. Al she cared about was being with Torin in that moment.

  The two traveled for almost an hour, but Lexie had long since lost any sense of direction once Torin reared off the highway. As Torin took the bike down winding roads, the green countryside of old farms and vast forests passed by in a blur. He pul ed off onto a thin dirt road, the bike bumped along over ruts and pot holes without difficulty. He reached down and gave Lexie’s hands a gentle squeeze. If she had been with anyone else, she would have been

  petrified. With Torin, she felt invincible.

  As he urged the bike along, Lexie noticed there were no inhabitants on the old road. The forest around them grew thicker as the road grew narrow. After a while, it resembled more of a trail than an actual street.

  The Yamaha slowed and turned into what Lexie could only cal a yard. Even though trees grew al around it, a stately

  old home sat nestled in the forest’s shadows. Although it was far past its prime, the two story structure was splendid.

  Stationed around each corner and the front door, were six buttresses with pinnacles on top of each, al connected together with intricate woodwork. It reminded her of what her home could have looked like if designed with a little more imagination.

  She climbed from his bike, her wobbly legs grateful to be on solid ground. She removed his helmet and just stared at the house in amazement.

  Torin stood beside her, his hand on the smal of her back.

  “Do you like it?”

  “I love it,” she sighed. “You never see old houses like this anymore. How did you find it?”

  Capturing her hand, Torin led her to the front door. “It belonged to my family. It’s been kind of forgotten, but I have always enjoyed coming here.”

  Lexie was surprised to see him rummage in his pocket and pul out a key. He inserted it into the lock and the creaky door fel open. As she stepped into the grand front room, she was startled with how much natural light spil ed through the windows. There was a barren piece of furniture here and there, but mostly the room stood empty.

  “What wil happen to this place?” She hated the thought of it deteriorating.

  “My parents know that I love it here,” he looked at her through his heavy lashes. “They always said I can refinish it and make it my own.” He paused and walked over to the

  enormous fireplace. He ran his fingertips across the

  smooth wood on the mantle. “Until recently, I never took the offer seriously because I didn’t plan on staying around here…but my plans have changed.”

  He was thinking of leaving? The possibility was dreadful.

  “I’m relieved to hear you’ve changed your mind.” She tried to smile, but worried he might stil go.

  Torin approached her. There was a haunted look in his

  eyes and it troubled her.

  “Can I show you something?” he asked.

  Lexie trembled at just being near him – didn’t he know he could show her anything or take her anywhere? Just being alone with him was enough for her.

  Torin ascended the winding staircase, guiding her by the hand to the top. Like her home, a hal ful of doors stretched across the second floor. He opened the first one and led he
r into a large bedroom. She could almost make out the print of the ancient peeling wal paper; the floral design must have been beautiful at one time.

  Concern etched across her face, when Torin pushed open an old window and stepped out onto the porch roof. He

  poked

  his head back in and offered her his hand. “Don’t worry, it’s safe.”

  She tried to swal ow, but her mouth was too dry. She

  propel ed her legs forward by just trusting in his blue eyes.

  Once out the window, she grasped his hand as tightly as possible. The short roof wasn’t in the best condition and had a steep slant. She knew she was being dramatic, but the shingles were old and they were far from civilization if something happened.

  Torin sat against the side of the house and gently pul ed her down beside him. He kept her close, never removing his hand from hers. “Is this okay?”

  “It’s not what I expected, but it’s okay.” She looked at the sweeping forest around her and realized it was beautiful in a natural way.

  “Did you want to stay in the bedroom?” his voice husky.

  He ran his thumb seductively across her wrist.

  Lexie blushed, acutely aware of how his words sent tingles through her. “This is nice,” she managed to murmur.

  He grinned, the shape of his mouth flawless. Lexie

  moistened her lips – she wanted to kiss him. She diverted her eyes, pretending to study the smal railing that ran around edge of the roof. As much as she wanted to get

  swept up in him again, she needed to know something first.

  “My brother tried warning me away from you.” It sounded sil y to her ears. “He heard you were involved in al sorts of shenanigans.”

  “Only sometimes,” he chuckled. “I didn’t get the impression he liked me much when he whisked you away the other day before I had the chance to properly say goodbye.

  What else did he say?” He stroked her forearm, sending flutters through her bel y.

  “It doesn’t matter,” she insisted. “I didn’t believe him anyway.” Lexie wanted him to understand.

  “What?” he smiled.

  “He tried saying that you real y hurt some kid,” she replied with a disbelieving shake of her head.

  Torin stared off in the distance, his blue eyes focused beyond where she could see. “I did…kind of.” His words came out softly.

  Lexie regarded him with surprise. She didn’t expect him to say that.

  “I was fourteen. The boarding school I attended brought our class to spend a holiday at the beach. One of my best

  friends that year was Shane. He wasn’t big like me and my cousins – he was this speck of a kid with a red mop of hair.

  And funny – he could make a sailor blush with his

  vocabulary.” Torin glanced at Lexie, his eyes sad.

  “What happened?” she asked.

  “I should have kept an eye on him. Instead, I was fooling around in the water, trying to see how far I could dive under before needing to come up to breathe.”

  “But that wouldn’t have been your fault,” she stammered.

  “Shane drowned and I didn’t save him.” His voice wasn’t more than just a whisper. “I’ve never forgiven myself for letting him down.”

  Lexie felt ashamed for mentioning it. She mourned for Torin and what that must have been like for him. “It’s hard to forgive yourself, but you have to try.” Have I ever forgiven myself? She wondered if she was a hypocrite.

  Torin didn’t answer, just continued to course his fingertips along her arm.

  She hadn’t told anyone about her father since moving to Maine. As she processed his revelation, she wanted to be able share a part of her own past, too. Could she trust Torin to share something so personal? Without asking, she knew but wondered where to begin.

  “My father is gone because of me.” Torin gave her a

  questioning look, but she continued. “Just last summer, it was in the evening; right before the sun set completely. Dad was teaching me to drive. It was just the two of us and we were

  talking about our upcoming trip to the Cape.” Although she had told the story before, it felt like the first time. Her eyes focused on Torin’s beautiful face, his genuine concern was so sweet.

  “Dad was convinced he could make me like lobster

  because it was his favorite food. I thought he was insane if he believed I would eat an ocean cockroach. I just

  remember how contagious his laughter was…. I miss it so much.” She smiled with regret, thinking of the wonderful baritone of his laughter and how it fil ed the car. “I didn’t realize the roads had grown so slippery from someone’s vehicle leaking motor oil.”

  Torin brushed behind her ear the long tendril of hair that had fal en into her eyes. With kindness, he whispered, “He would have Lexie… if he had known.” Torin’s arms slipped around her, she leaned into him. Somehow he knew what

  she needed.

  “We were just driving.…” Torin waited for her while she searched for the right words to describe the most

  unbearable moment of her existence. “I remember the

  sounds of the metal grinding together as the roof pul ed apart. The windshield sprayed al over us as we were

  rol ed. The car col apsed in on us. Dad put his arm out, trying to brace me. I didn’t even have time to scream.” In the movies, everything happens in slow motion, but it wasn’t like that.

  “When everything stopped, it was so silent. My hand

  reached for him but we were folded up under the

  dashboard.

  Final y, I felt for him and found his warm shoulder. I held on and concentrated on not letting go. But, the blackness that swam around me pul ed me under.”

  Lexie’s voice trembled as she recal ed the finality of that night. “You know Torin, the worst part is – I don’t know if he was alive then, if he felt me holding him, or if he was trying to say something.” She blinked back the tears in her eyes, before they had a chance to spil . “I didn’t know he was leaving me, that he wouldn’t be okay. He was taking his final breaths and I let myself black out.”

  Torin kissed her head and hugged her against him. “I’m sorry.”

  “So many times over the last year I’ve thought – If I had just stayed home, or even let him drive, he would stil be here. I wouldn’t have taken away my mom’s husband or my

  sister’s dad. I’ve been trying to make it up to them ever since – I try to make their lives easy without complaint. I guess it’s my own penance. I never did get my license.”

  She knew the pain had become a part of her and something she learned to live with. But the experience taught her early on that life was short and it could end without warning.

  She looked into his pained blue eyes and tried to smile.

  “I’m stil working on forgiving myself. Maybe you could, too.”

  “I’m beginning to.” He leaned in and brushed his lips over hers. “It’s hard to be cynical when I am around you.”

  She liked the way the light streamed through the trees and cast a glow over him. The warm tones in his hair were the color of mocha in the sun. His deep blue eyes and chiseled features were flawless. He truly was beautiful and it was amazing that he wanted to be with her. She could feel the definition of his hard muscles under his clothes. He was her Adonis.

  She twisted around so she could face him. It was time to learn the truth. “Do you believe in magic?”

  “Yes,” he didn’t hesitate. “My entire family is Irish, it’s who we are. We al believe in magic.” His expression relaxed with the change in subject.

  She sat with her legs crossed, his knees bumped hers.

  She pul ed at her sneaker laces, twisting them like strands of Twizzler licorice. “Why do I dream of you? I mean…” She almost didn’t continue. She gaged his expression; his

  sincerity was encouraging. “I started dreaming of you last summer. It was after my dad died when I was sleeping a lot.


  It was al I had to look forward to at the time. I thought the dream was a figment of

  my imagination, until I met you.” She searched his eyes, looking for the answer. “I’m not crazy, am I?”

  Torin pul ed the hand she was twirling her laces with into his lap. He opened her palm and traced his finger across her lifeline. “You’re not crazy. In fact, you’re perfect. Everything about you couldn’t be more so if I made a list of al of the qualities I wanted in a partner and special ordered you.” His voice spoke so quietly, she had to strain to listen.

  Her body zinged with a flush of desire. Hearing him say that was such a relief. She wanted to embrace him, but

  wondered why he stil seemed so melancholy. She looked down at her open palm as he ran his finger over the long crease.

  “This is hard to say, but I’m not like other people. My family – we’re different. We have to be.” He opened his own hand and held it out to her. She placed her palm in his and he shifted her up and onto his lap. She paid no attention this time to the roof’s steep slope or aged shingles. The

  intimate embrace Torin held her in was so perfect she felt as if her heart might burst.

  Torin brushed his smooth lips over her ear. “Wil you trust me?” he asked simply.

  Lexie nestled her body closer to his, enjoying the sensation of his mouth against her sensitive skin. She held tightly to his arms, bracing herself against him. “Yes.”

  He swept the hair back from her neck and trailed his lips down her sensitive throat. “The dream means that we are meant to be together. It’s fate…” His voice was husky.

  She tilted her chin back, releasing the sigh that had been building. Each spot his lips touched burned with pleasure.

  Closing her eyes, she touched her hands to his face and guided his mouth back to her own. His hands pressed her against his firm body. Never before did she imagine she could feel so complete.

  Torin froze, his lips hovering over hers. His warm body held perfectly stil . Bewildered, she took a few deep breaths, trying to steady the hammering in her chest. Lexie heard what he spotted first – dirt bikes.