by L A Cotton
“Ladies, looking good.” His gaze swept over Eva and Letty, lingering a little too long on our support act. “Riley, I’m almost empty.”
“It’s an open bar, Hudson. I’m your assistant, not your gofer. You have hands, use them. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find Alistair.”
“Is she allowed to talk to us like that?”
“Maybe if you didn’t insist on pushing her buttons it’d go smoother.” I suggested.
“Nah, she’s too easy to work up. Besides.” his eyes followed her across the club, “it’s all part of the irresistible charm.”
“Please tell me you’re not going to try and bed her.” Letty sounded mildly disgusted.
“What?” Hudson gawked at her. “She’s hot and I like a challenge.”
Eva turned her attention to the dance floor, watching the hand selected audience—contest winners, industry types, friends of the label—fake it up.
“Yo,” Hudson nudged me, “we’re up.” He pointed to where Damon and Levi were chatting to the club manager.
“Kill it,” Letty said, holding up her fist.
“You know it.” Hudson downed the remnants of his beer and slammed it on a nearby table before fist bumping her. “Laters, baby.”
“You’re performing?” Eva asked. “I didn’t know.” Her eyes slid to Letty’s in question.
“I thought it would be a surprise.” Guilt flashed across her face, but I didn’t miss the conspiratorial look she shot me.
What the fuck was she up to?
Knowing Letty, it was nothing good.
“Are you okay?” I asked Eva before I could stop myself. “You know... with everything. It was pretty wild out there.”
A couple of guys barreled past us, knocking Eva into me. My hands shot out, steadying her. “Hey, watch it,” I yelled after them.
“Shit, sorry, Rafe, my man. I didn’t see you there.”
“It’s not me you almost flattened.”
“Fuck, my bad.” The guys held up his hands to Eva. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine, really.” She stepped back and I released her, jamming my hands in my jean pockets. I shouldn’t have touched her. Because now it was all I could think about doing.
“I should...”
“Go, of course. Good luck up there.” Eva flashed me a blinding smile. It was more than I deserved, but no less than I wanted.
Damon and Hudson were right. I wasn’t sure I could do it—keep her at a distance, suppress my feelings for her. Especially not when she was standing there, looking at me like I was everything she wanted.
Everything she needed.
“Rafe,” Letty’s voice grounded me. “They’re waiting.”
“Uh, yeah… right.” Tearing my eyes away from Eva, I made my way over to the guys, who were already on stage setting up.
“What took you so long?” Levi asked me, none the wiser, too amped up to notice.
Always too distracted to notice.
“I’m here, aren’t I?” I grabbed the guitar—one of my back-ups since my favorite was back at the hotel safe and sound—and slid the strap over the neck. The familiar weight of the instrument settled me. Became an extension of me. A way to channel all the shit I had to shoulder. When my fingers ran over the frets, I was free.
“Welcome to Basement Vibes,” Levi stepped closer to the mic, adjusting the stand the way he liked it. “For those of you who don’t already know it, we’re Black Hearts Still Beat, and Gary, the owner of this very fine establishment, asked us to stop by and play a few songs tonight.” Actually, our label had brokered the performance, but Levi knew the routine. He knew how to work the crowd and tell the people what they wanted to hear.
The room exploded with applause, a much less raucous response than what we were used to. But these people weren’t your average fans, so we had to work a little harder for their approval. Levi shot me an amused look, his lip curving into a devious grin. Shaking my head, I silently tried to tell him to abort whatever fucked-up plan I knew he was hatching.
“We’ve been warned to be on our best behavior tonight,” he went on, “but we’re about to go on tour. And if you have any idea what it’s like to be cooped up with three other guys for months on end, then you’ll probably know it’s only healthy to blow off a little steam beforehand. So what d’ya say, Charlotte. Do you wanna help me fuck things up?”
Alistair caught my eye, dragging a single finger across his neck. Fucking Levi. He hadn’t only gone off script, he’d ushered the room into near silence. A couple of people down by the front of the stage, probably contest winners, whooped, but everyone else stared wide-eyed, mortification etched in their expressions. Their disapproval only spurred my brother on. He gave Hudson the nod, mouthing something at him, and the intro beat of one of our darker songs, Poison in My Veins, filled the room. I cursed beneath my breath as I plucked the strings, building the opening bars. We were supposed to be sticking to our more mainstream material, but no, my self-sabotaging brother had decided to pick the one song he knew I had vocals on.
The one song he knew I wouldn’t want to sing.
* * *
It stings, it burns, but the pain don’t hurt
Cut me open and I will bleed, oh, you’re poison...
Poison in my veins.
* * *
I clutched the mic, eyes closed, stage lights blazing down on me as the words spilled from my lips. Beads of sweat rolled down my back, clung to the strands of hair falling over my face.
* * *
Cut me open and I will bleed, oh you’re poison...
Poison in my veins.
* * *
You say you want to cleanse me, save me, purify my soul
But you’re not the messiah, you’re just the devil’s in sheep’s clothes
So cut me open and I will bleed, oh you’re poison...
You’re poison in my veins.
* * *
I looked over at Levi. He too was lost in the lyrics, in the meaning behind them. No one knew the truth, they never would. It was a secret that would die with us, but we knew.
We lived with the burden every single minute of every day.
* * *
Poison, poison in my veins...
* * *
Our voices held the last note, my gravelly tone wrapping around his raw screech. Even on stage, I couldn’t help but want to protect him; to reassure him and hold him up. We weren’t only brothers; we were all the other had. Sure, we had Damon and Hudson and the band and all that came with it, but nobody would ever know me the way Levi knew me. Or know my brother the way I knew him. What we shared transcended the bonds of family, of brothers. It was part of us, weaved inextricably into the fiber of our beings.
The music faded, the pain that always came with singing that song lingering deep in my soul. I wiped my brow with the back of my hand and looked out at the crowd. It was always the same; a sea of faceless people. But tonight, my eyes found solace in a pair of ocean eyes.
Eva stood with Letty right where I’d left them, and although I couldn’t be certain, I was sure I saw the shimmer of tears in her eyes. The sudden applause from the crowd broke our connection though. Levi stalked toward me, slinging his arm over my shoulder.
“Thought you might appreciate something from our early days. Although my brother, here, might disagree.” He grinned at me and I wanted nothing more than to knock his head off his shoulders. “I love this sonofabitch more than anything. He likes to stay hidden behind his guitar, but he’s got a killer voice too. What do you say? Do you think my bro Rafe can sing?”
“Quit it,” I gritted out, forcing a smile to our rapt audience. He’d done it. Levi had won over a room full of industry types; men with fat wallets and women with expensive habits.
Damon caught my eye and shook his head, hardly surprised. I rolled my eyes. Levi was a cocky motherfucker. The perpetual thorn in my side. But he was also my blood and despite our differences, I loved him something fierce.
Humo
ring him, I cupped the mic and said, “I appreciate the applause but don’t get too used to it. I prefer the shadows not the spotlight.”
Levi let out a hearty laugh. He seemed in a particularly good mood tonight; that or he was high. Which meant he was using, again. Moving to center stage again, he winked at me and then declared, “Good job for my brother, I fucking love the spotlight. Hud, I’m feeling kinda Dirty, give me a beat.”
The sound of his drums rattled around my chest and for the next thirty minutes we played an intimate set for our audience. By the time we were done, my shirt was soaked and my throat was dry, but my skin tingled in the best possible fucking way. Unlike my brother, I’d never needed a synthetic high. This was enough.
The music.
The lyrics.
The adrenaline pumping through my veins.
It was enough to settle my demons and soothe my soul.
“I need a drink,” I declared, running a hand through my damp hair.
“Drink? I need a good hard fuck.”
“You ever considered getting help with that?” I teased Hudson.
“What like sex therapy? Nah, man, ain’t a problem unless you make it one.” He shot me a wink and then took off towards a group of waiting women.
“Hey,” I grabbed Levi as he went to walk away, “what was that?” His brows bunched together as he stared at me. “Don’t do that, Lev. Don’t pretend like that wasn’t something. We don’t sing that song. We never sing that song.”
He shrugged as if it was no big deal.
But we both knew it was a big fucking deal.
“It’s nothing. Chill.”
I searched his face for a clue he was lying. Levi was a master in deception. A chameleon when it came to hiding his true feelings or intentions. Sometimes he wore his mood for all to see: depressed, high, excited, angry. They were the things we were all used to, the things we could deal with. But it was the times he masked the truth that caught us off guard. The times he chalked up his wild behavior to boredom or restlessness, even our messed-up childhood. The times you didn’t know whether he was high on drugs or high on the ride.
He cracked a smile, squeezing my shoulder. “Relax, little brother, I’m good. Everything is good.”
Warning bells started sounding in my head, a distant jingle hinting that something wasn’t right. But before I could push him for answers, we were swarmed by people. “Great set, Levi. I’d love to talk to you...” My brother and the man melted into the crowd, leaving me to deal with a group of women old enough to be my mother. The thought made bile burn my throat.
“Rafe, that voice, you’ve been holding out on us.” One of them wrapped perfectly manicured nails around my arm. “So deep and sultry.” She batted her heavily made up eyes at me.
“Excuse me, ladies.” Riley appeared, flicking her hair off her shoulder. “But I need to borrow Rafe for a second.”
The woman beside me pouted, her free hand dipping into her purse. Before I could step away, she pressed something into my hand. “Call me,” she mouthed, licking her bottom lip, hunger blazing in her eyes.
Jesus. Women like her were a dime a dozen. It didn’t matter I was barely twenty and not legally old enough to buy them a drink. I was Rafe fucking Hunter and women all wanted their chance to bed a rock star.
“Going to keep that?” Riley dropped her gaze to my fist as we walked away from the women.
“Never do.”
“Is it always like that?”
“What do you think?” She gave me a weak smile. “Thanks for the save, though. I appreciate it.”
“Yeah, well, despite what your brother might think about me, I really do have your best interests at heart.” Riley flagged down a bartender and ordered. “Margarita extra lime, please. Rafe?”
“Just a beer please.” I slid onto the stool next to her, tapping my fingers against the black gloss counter.
“Your set was great.”
“Thanks. It’s not our usual crowd.”
“Levi seemed to win them all over in the end. Alistair is in high demand.” Her eyes flicked over to a booth where Alistair was seated with a group of suits, no doubt negotiating the band’s future.
“He’s never off the clock.” The bartender pushed a beer my way and I snatched it up, taking a long pull.
“Are you?” Her eyes bored into mine, asking me things I didn’t want to answer. Things she had no right to assume.
“Listen, I—”
“I’m probably going to get into a shit ton of trouble for this.” My brother’s voice echoed over the mic, and I glanced over at the stage to find him standing there again. “But I’ve never been one to follow the rules, and I’m not about to start now.”
A rumble of laughter reverberated around me, but I wasn’t laughing. “As most of you know, we’ve kept our special guest under wraps until now. But she’s here with us tonight, and I thought what better way to introduce her than with a song, just for you guys. Country,” he said, “get up here up and sing with me.”
Anger shot up my spine as I snapped my gaze to Riley. “Did you know about this?” She shook her head, her expression as surprised as mine. “Ali?” I asked.
“If he did... he didn’t breathe a word of it to me.” An indignant sigh left her lips.
I searched the darkened room for Letty, hoping she would be there to intervene. I might have been nothing but a cold-hearted dick to Eva since she arrived, but I knew her better than anyone on this tour and I knew she wouldn’t want to be ambushed like this, not where performing was concerned.
“I’m going to find—” The words dried on my tongue as the spotlight found Eva and she walked gracefully on stage.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” my brother drawled, “our special guest and the new sweetheart of country, Miss Evangeline Walker.” He held out his hand and she took it without missing a beat. It was so damn perfect it almost looked rehearsed, but I saw the tightness around her eyes, the thin press of her lips as she smiled.
Eva might have been fooling every single person in the room, but she wasn’t fooling me.
Levi covered his mic and leaned in to whisper something to her. Her eyes widened as she shook her head, but then he spoke again and her expression softened giving way to a small nod. “She said yes, thank fuck,” Levi said to the rest of us, “or that could have been all kinds of awkward.”
Someone ran on stage and handed Eva an acoustic guitar. She slipped the strap over her shoulder and familiarized herself with the instrument while Levi had someone bring him a stool. My brother never sat down to sing. He liked to perform. To strut up and down the stage or prowl or even crawl. But here, in a small club in Charlotte, Levi Hunter sat and performed a cover version of Running Up That Hill, while Eva gave an almost note-perfect performance of her own. She even provided flawless backing vocals.
“They look good together up there,” Riley said as they went into the last verse of the song. It was an innocent enough comment, but her words stung all the same.
Because she was right—they did look good together.
But that was the point, wasn’t it?
To let Eva’s light smother Levi’s darkness. To soften his jagged edges and make him more relatable to our younger fans.
Eva was here to fix what Levi had broken. But as I watched them weave together a note-perfect rendition of one of Levi’s most favorite songs ever, I couldn’t help but think she might end up fixing more than just his reputation.
Eva
Levi prowled toward me, slinging his arm around my shoulder and pulling me into his side. “How does it feel, Angel? That’s all for you.” He tipped his head to the crowd. There wasn’t a single person in the club not clapping or cheering or whistling.
“I...” Words failed me. I’d been unimpressed when Levi ambushed me like that, but Letty had told me to embrace it for what it was: a chance to warm up before the opening show tomorrow. As she’d also pointed out, everyone would know who the Black Hearts special guest was come tomo
rrow night anyway. So I could either go along with the plan or I could surprise everyone and reveal myself on my terms.
So I’d done it.
I’d actually done it and the crowd had loved it. Not that it would have mattered much if they hadn’t. Performing with Levi was like walking a tightrope. Dangerous and unpredictable, but a total rush.
I still felt like I was flying.
“Speechless looks good on you,” he said around a wicked smirk. “What do we think ladies and gents?” Levi crooned into the mic. “Do we think she passes the Levi Hunter test?”
Test.
It was another damn test.
I rolled my eyes at him, too caught up in the moment to care, and he rewarded me with a dark chuckle. “Fuck yeah, she does.” Levi’s eyes locked on mine, the weight of his stare sending a confusing shiver up my spine.
“We’ll need to keep an eye on you.” Hudson jumped up onto the stage and handed Levi a bottle of water before passing one to me. “Or else you’ll being stealing our front man right out from under us.”
“Like I’d ever leave you bunch of misfits.” Levi collared his friend in a headlock, ruffling his hair.
“That was freakin’ awesome.” Letty was waiting for me as I walked off stage. “Seriously, Eva, I’ve seen a lot of live music, but the way the two of you complimented each other... wow. It isn’t any wonder Alistair wanted you on the tour.”
Heat bloomed along my neck and into my cheeks. “I can’t believe I just did that.”
“Believe it, girl.” She looped her arm through mine, guiding me toward the bar. Strangers called my name, congratulating me as we passed them, and a couple of important looking men tried to shove cards into my hands. I smiled politely, letting Letty do her thing and get us to the bar in one piece. Travis and Grayson hovered close by, moving in the shadows, their eyes permanently trained on me. I hadn’t been certain when Alistair first introduced me to them, but now there was an odd kind of reassurance knowing they were there.