A Love We Deserve

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A Love We Deserve Page 7

by Betsy Anne


  I take Katie’s advice and give myself a mini-makeover. I darken my platinum blond a few shades, and incorporate natural highlights. I’ve sworn off tanning beds, too, after she gave me a lecture on skin safety. I look and feel better than I have in years, probably since college. All the worrying I had about dating now seems like time wasted. I’m happier, and so my boys are happier, too. For the first time in a very long time, I’m hopeful for a happily-ever-after.

  Chris’ sister hasn’t seen the boys over in a while, and she offered to have them this weekend. Perfect timing for us to have our double date. I call Katie to make the plans.

  “Hey, girl. Where should we go this Saturday? Any ideas?”

  “Well, Jason is on the sidelines at the Northwestern game helping out his friend, but he’ll be home by 5:00 p.m. Want to head downtown?”

  “Yes! I haven’t been out downtown in so long. You and Jason pick the place and we’ll meet you there. I’m a free woman so we may decide to stay in the city. Who knows? I’m so excited for the two of you to meet Caleb. I know you’ll love him.”

  Jason chooses a famous Chicago steakhouse. When Caleb and I arrive, just a few minutes late, the maître d’ lets us know our party is here, and he leads us to the table. Jason must have some pull, because we have the best table in the place. It’s adjacent to a stone fireplace that is crackling with fresh wood. I’m really nervous; this meeting is so important to me. If things work out with Caleb, the four of us will be spending a lot of time together. Katie’s the first to see us, and she hops out of her chair and rushes to us. She gives me a huge hug, and the gives one to Caleb.

  “I’ve been so excited to meet you.”

  “Pleasure is all mine,” he says with her arms still around his neck.

  “OK now, you have yours, let go of mine. Caleb this is Jason, Katie’s husband.”

  The two men heartily shake hands and give the one slap on the back that men do. When do they learn this stuff? We all sit down and Jason pours us wine from the open bottle on the table.

  “I’m so sorry we’re a little late. Beth came to pick up the boys around 3:00 p.m., and I wanted Caleb to see the house. I gave him the tour.”

  I realize the way that sounded. I blush a deep red and Katie cracks up. Jason laughs, too, and makes a little quip.

  “Hey, man, a tour is the best reason to be late for anything.”

  He slaps Caleb on the back again. I really did want to have Caleb over. He waited to come until the boys were gone so we could get ready together and avoid any awkward meetings. He loved the house, and had so much fun looking at the kids’ toys and sports memorabilia. Jason has gotten the boys autographs from just about every famous Chicago athlete possible. Caleb was impressed.

  “OK, I want to be ten again. I would live in this room and never come out!”

  He was so adorable. I stood and stared at his face while he was looking through the shelves. He turned around to ask me a question and caught me watching.

  “What is it?”

  He walked over to me, and took my hands.

  “Why do you have that weird look on your face? Did I touch something I wasn’t supposed to?”

  “I’m in love with you, Caleb. I knew I felt it, but I wasn’t sure until just now. I love you.”

  His face lit up. His hands cupped my face and he kissed me so passionately I thought I would melt on the spot. I couldn’t believe I said it. I knew I was, but the feeling just overwhelmed me. I thought I wouldn’t be able to say another word before I told him. I had no idea how he would react; I just needed him to know.

  “I love you, too, Melanie. I’ve had such strong feelings for you; I’ve been afraid to admit them. I didn’t want to scare you away. I’m just so sorry I didn’t say it first. I love you so much, sweetheart.”

  He was so sweet and sincere. He picked me up and carried me down the hall to my beautiful, un-christened bedroom, and looked like he had plans to change that status. He lay me down softly on my bed, while he stared into my eyes.

  “I love you, baby, I really do. Thank you for having the courage to say it. I know how hard it is for you, always having your boys best interests at heart. I just want you to know I’m here for you.”

  He took his time undressing me, slowly and lovingly. We’d had a lot of sex before this, but we were making love for the first time. We held eye contact the entire time. We both whispered to each other, “I love you.”

  When we were finished, there was no time to bask in the glow, we had to rush to get out the door. Now here we are, with my two closest friends in the world, with the man I just declared my love for. I couldn’t be happier. Jason and Caleb are deep in conversation already, which is a great thing. Jason can be a little cold if he doesn’t like you, so this is a good sign. I knew they’d hit it off; they have a lot in common. I hear Jason talking to him about the possibility of him offering deep tissue sports massage at his main office. Geez, they move quickly. I look over at Katie to say something, and she has a weird look on her face.

  “Kat, what’s wrong? I know you, that’s one of your ‘I see visions’ creepy looks. You’re freaking me out.”

  “He’s not the one from my dream, Mel. Definitely not.”

  “You don’t like him? What are you talking about?”

  “You know, the dream I had.”

  “I know but you said you couldn’t see his face. How do you know it’s not him?”

  “I just know, OK? I like Caleb, I really do! I’m happy for you, but he’s not the one you were with. I don’t feel the same connection between you two like you had with the person in my dream.”

  I must have a strange expression, because she backpedals quickly.

  “Mel, it means nothing! I shouldn’t have opened my big mouth. Maybe he is the guy, and I’m just a little off. Ignore me, and my stupid dreams. We are celebrating your happiness.”

  “I just told him I love him tonight, Kat. You know how much your opinion means to me, and we both know just how accurate your ‘dreams’ are. Please try to see something else. Really think about it. I love him, I really do.”

  “You love him, I love him. Story closed, not another word about it. This wine sucks; I need something a little stronger. Waiter!”

  She tries her best all night to seem OK. I know her too well though; it’s bothering her. Maybe her dream meant something else. Jason picks up on her weird vibe, too, but he ignores it. I think he really likes Caleb and doesn’t want her to seem rude. We part ways at the end of dinner, Jason and Caleb seemingly new best buds, and make all the obligatory promises to do it again soon.

  * * *

  Jason and Katie

  “Honey, what was going on tonight? You weren’t yourself. Are you feeling OK?”

  “Jason, I just can’t explain it. Caleb is a very nice guy, and he wasn’t doing anything wrong. Remember that dream I told you about with Mel?”

  “Sure. Wasn’t she with someone? Didn’t that make you happy?”

  “Of course, it did. All I’ve wanted is for her to be happy. The problem is that Caleb isn’t the guy in my dream. Not just because of how he looked, it was something between them. My dream was so vivid; she seemed… different. I felt about her and that guy like they were soulmates like you and me. I know she really cares for Caleb, and maybe loves him but I’m telling you, I feel it. He’s not the guy who’s out there for her.”

  “Just be careful, Kat. You don’t want to end up damaging the relationship you have with her over something like this. Let her be happy. Now get your fine ass up those stairs and we can finish our night the right way.”

  Chapter 8

  “Oh my God! I can’t believe it. I’m down another three pounds. That makes eighteen altogether in six weeks!”

  I jump up and down like a mad woman. With Caleb’s help, and my hard work I’m almost at my goal weight. Seven pounds more to go. He hates it when I get on the scale. He says that it’s no measure of fitness, and the numbers can get you obsessed about the wrong things.
I don’t care; I like to see the numbers drop. He hasn’t been complaining about the new lingerie I’ve been buying either. I’m finally feeling some positive self-esteem and I want to show off my hard work to the man I love.

  He keeps me fed, too. He loves to cook, and he’s amazing at it. He makes us gourmet lunches, and will pack some for me to bring to the boys. They still haven’t met him, but I have told them all about him. Just as a friend, though. My mother-bear instincts just won’t let me cross that barrier yet. I know Caleb is getting anxious about it, but he won’t say anything. He’s always asking about them. Chris had the boys to his place two weeks ago. They acted up a little when they got home, so that just put off their meeting with him again. I keep telling myself, baby steps, baby steps. We’ll get there.

  Caleb and I started early today. He had a client at 6:00 a.m., so I came and worked out with him right after. He didn’t have anything booked after me, so he offered to give me a massage. Other than massages in the bedroom, I haven’t been back to the spa area here since that first night.

  “All right, gorgeous, you know the drill. Get naked and wait for me.”

  He swats me on the butt, and scurries off to get his things. I love this area; it’s beautiful and relaxing. I take off my clothes, and I climb onto the heated massage table. What great memories this brings back. I still remember the look on his face when my sheet dropped: His look of pure desire changed me inside. Chris hadn’t looked at me like that since before we were married. In Chris’ mind, why would you desire your wife? Where’s the fun in that? No thrill of the chase, just the same boring woman who gave birth to your kids. Asshole.

  I hear the door creak a little - now he doesn’t have to knock before entering - and close quietly. I’m face down, just like last time, and I’m not saying a word. I want him to take control; this is his domain. He’s humming a little tune; he’s so cute, while he sets up the room. I smell the candle, but stronger this time, and it seems a bit brighter. He must have lit a few more than last time. Next should be the spa music, lutes and harps to relax by. He is putting on music, but this isn’t for the spa. It’s a hard, pulsating beat, but played on low volume. Something’s telling me this isn’t going to be a typical massage.

  “Hey, baby, turn over,” he whispers warmly in my ear and it shoots straight down to my loins. I do as he asks, and flip over. He grabs the sheet covering me, and folds it down to my waist so my chest and stomach are exposed.

  “Hey, it took an hour of massage to get to this point last time,” I say with laughter in my voice.

  “Well, this morning, I don’t really feel like that just yet. I have something a lot more, interesting in mind.”

  I hear myself swallow. I don’t need the table warmer anymore; I could warm this whole place with what’s happening in my crotch. My nipples pucker with the sudden exposure, and he clamps his mouth down on one hungrily.

  “Mmm,” he moans while sucking my breast, and the sound he makes with his mouth sends my nervous system into overload. I instinctively arch my back to open my chest up further to him. He frees my breast from his mouth, and walks to his table of supplies. I assume he’s getting the oil, but I’m wrong. He picks up a candle in a metal tin. He returns to the space he had left, and looks me in the eye.

  “Do you trust me?” he faintly whispers.

  “Of course I do,” I whisper back, even though my stomach is in knots wondering what he has planned. He reaches up to my face, and gently closes my eyes with his hand.

  “Just feel it, baby. Take it all in.”

  His whisper was even quieter this time, barely audible, but I heard it. I nod my head in acceptance, and wait. I can smell the aroma of the candle, and I feel the heat closer to my body. The heat! Ouch! My eyes spring open and I watch in shock as I see him pour the wax onto my nipple. He sees that I’m watching, and he shakes his head.

  “Tsk, tsk. Close your eyes. It’s not the same, if you watch.”

  All I can feel is a burned tit, what other sensation could there be? Oh, wait. I spoke too soon. He allows time for my body to get over the initial shock, and I feel the sensation he’s speaking of. The burning is gone, but an electric pulse takes its place. My nipple hardens and the cooling wax is pinching my tit. All the shock waves are traveling straight to my crotch. He was right; it’s a heady sensation. I’m basking in the extremeness of it all as my body adjusts, when I feel the burn on my other tit. Whoa! I see why you need to keep your eyes closed. The burn lasts only a second, and it’s the surprise that’s so exciting. He places the candle back on the table, and begins to massage the warm wax into my skin. His strong hands make easy work of clearing the leftovers from my chest.

  “I really wanted to take my time with this today, but I need a taste first. I can’t help myself.”

  He pulls the remainder of the sheet down and off the table. He nears my feet and in one swift motion he grabs my ankles and I slide down the table to my rear. He lifts my dangling legs, throws them over his shoulders and gets to business. His tongue is exploring my slit, and he heads lower. His tongue teases my ass, as he rubs my clit with the palm of his hand. I grab his hair and pull as I scream. My orgasm comes out of nowhere, and the spontaneity of it makes me yell. He gets to his feet quickly, and covers my mouth. He’s trying to suppress a laugh.

  “Shh! People will hear you, we’re not alone in here today!”

  Oh shit, I wasn’t even thinking. Not that he gave me any chance of that. We both stay still for a moment and listen for any signs that someone heard me. All quiet. Most of the other employees all know that we’re dating, but the other clients and patrons aren’t supposed to know it, too. He peeks his head out the door just to make sure, and it’s all clear. We’re safe.

  “OK, miss, maybe a gag is in order since you can’t seem to control yourself.”

  He walks over to me and pulls down his pants. He rolls me over onto my side, as he adjusts the height of the bed so that my mouth is level with his dick. I grab him and guide him into my mouth then he takes over. He holds the back of my head, and fucks my mouth. All I have to do is lay here and enjoy the taste and feel of him with my tongue. I can tell he’s getting close. He looks down at me and I slightly nod my head to let him know it’s OK. He comes hard and pushes his dick farther into my mouth. I feel his warm liquid pour down my throat as he pulsates. I swallow everything he gives me, as I continue to suck. He’s biting his lower lip, forcing an exhale through his nose. He looks into my eyes, and mouths, “F-u-c-k M-e,” I think he enjoyed it. He slowly pulls out of my mouth, and leans down over my body. After he regulates his breath, he leans over and kisses me.

  “Thank you, gorgeous,” he says quietly. He’s good; he barely made any sound at all. He pulls up his pants, and I get dressed. My chest still smells like the candle. He cleans up the room quickly and turns up the lights. I feel a gentle kiss on the back of my head.

  “OK. I owe you a real breakfast now. I love you, Melanie.”

  I should say so, that doesn’t count as a meal in my book. People are in line to scan their cards to get into the gym, looking like a hoard of zombies as we walk past them out the front door. He’s holding my hand as we walk toward his car. I notice a striking woman get out of her car parked next to Caleb’s. Fuck me. It’s her, Suzanne. Chris’ ex-wife is walking toward us. She noticed me before I saw her, because she’s staring a hole right through me. Caleb notices, and turns to me.

  “Do you know her? Who is that?”

  Before I even get a chance to explain, she opens her mouth first.

  “Well, well, well, if it isn’t the slut herself. You’re looking well, Melanie, not quite the lard ass you were last time I saw you.”

  She sees Caleb and I are holding hands.

  “I heard about Chris, karma’s a bitch, huh? Is this one married, too? Does his stupid wife know you’re throwing your used pussy at her husband? I’d get tested if I were you, pal. Do yourself a favor.”

  She storms off into the gym. Jesus Christ. All I
ever told Caleb about Chris was that he was a workaholic and that we decided to go our separate ways. It was too early in our relationship to do the ex bashing, in my opinion. I didn’t want to come off as a bitter bitch the way Suzanne just did. Caleb lets my hand drop and I see he’s white as a ghost. He throws his bag in his car, gets in and slams the door. Tears are streaming down his face as he looks at me, and speeds off. I stand in my spot, unable to move or think. This has been one hell of a morning and it’s not even 9:00 a.m.

  I call Katie. My car is at his place. I had driven there first, and we went to the gym together. She picks me up, and we drive to his house. She’s just as stunned at his house as I had been the first time I saw it. She already knew his story, but the house just speaks for itself. I’m so scared that he would be here, but he isn’t. I have no idea where he could have gone, but I’m thankful nonetheless. I have a lot of explaining to do, and I need time to sort it out thoughtfully before I do. Katie follows me home and comes in. She starts crying.

  “Oh, Mel, Oh, Mel,”

  She doesn’t know what to say. I don’t know what to say. I would love to storm around calling Suzanne a giant bitch who ruined my life, but the truth is, I’ve been in her shoes, and it sucks. Even though I never knew he was married, I could have read the signs a little better. If I ever ran into one of the women he screwed, I probably would have acted the same way. At least I’ve never met any of them that I know of.

  I had an unfortunate run-in with Suzanne when John was about two. I was with him in the grocery store, and I saw Chris’ sister Beth from behind. She was speaking with a woman I didn’t recognize so I went up to say hello. The woman clearly knew who I was and freaked out. Poor Beth didn’t know what to do. It was her, and she knew my face from spying on Chris. Beth had told me about it, but I never thought about the pictures she would have seen of the two of us. My face must have been burnt onto her brain, understandably. Thank God for Beth between us, because she started to flail at me. Poor John was crying in the cart, and everyone was looking. Beth was yelling at me to leave so she could calm her down.

 

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