Flutter mba-3

by Аманда Хокинг

  “No. I just…” Ezra trailed off again, and a spasm went over his body. He gripped even tighter and I could barely breathe. The spasm passed, and he relaxed, as least as much as it had been before. “I’m sorry.”

  “Ezra, stop. It’s okay.” Something occurred to me, and I looked up at Peter. He was still on the phone, but he caught my look and returned it curiously. He got off the phone hurriedly and waited expectantly. “This is because they drank his blood, right?”

  “You’re a regular Sherlock,” Peter retorted tightly.

  “It’s not just blood loss, though, right?” I continued, ignoring him. “There’s that too, but it’s because he had to feel all their hate and evil and everything. But when I drank Jack’s blood, I felt all his love-”

  “No,” Ezra cut me off.

  “But if you drank my blood, it would solve everything!” I persisted. “You’d get the blood you need and it’d erase your negative feelings.”

  “No,” Peter said flatly. “That’s too excessive. You can’t do that.”

  The way he looked at me, I knew it was more than that. Ezra drinking my blood would help, but Peter didn’t want him to do it because it was me. Even though we weren’t bonded anymore, Peter apparently wasn’t eager to share my blood with anyone else, even if it meant that Ezra would still suffer.

  “If it makes him feel better-”

  “No,” Ezra repeated. “I can’t do that to you. You would feel of some of this.” With that, he gripped me even tighter, and I had to admit, that it terrified to me feel any of what he felt. If it could do this to Ezra, the most powerful vampire I’d ever met, then it would desolate me.

  “I can handle it,” I lied.

  “No.” Ezra grimaced again, and I realized that fighting me over this was only making it worse.

  “The best thing for him to do is rest,” Peter said, staring at us both with a severe expression on his face. “The feelings will fade, with time. Our flight leaves in seven hours. He can get some rest and eat, and then he ought to feel good enough to at least make it home.”

  “Are you sure?” I whispered to Ezra, and I saw Peter stiffen out of the corner of my eye.

  “You’re already doing too much,” Ezra insisted. He opened his eyes, trying to look at me through the pained sheen that covered his eyes.

  “I’ve hardly done anything.” I pushed the hair from his eyes so I could get a better look at him.

  “Right now, you’re doing everything.” He closed his eyes again, and buried his head deeper into my lap.

  I didn’t really understand what the meant, so I looked to Peter for help, but he wouldn’t meet my eyes.

  He watched Ezra for a moment as Ezra struggled to keep his breaths even. I felt him biting back screams, and I tried to whisper words of comfort to him. I held him to me, rubbing his back, and promising him that this would be over soon.

  Peter set about packing our things and getting us ready to go. I felt like I should help him, but I couldn’t very well get out of bed and leave Ezra alone. For some reason, this had made him desperate for physical contact. Eventually, Peter suggested we get some sleep. Ezra seemed to be going in and out of consciousness. I managed to doze off a little bit while sitting up, but it was frequently interrupted by Ezra moaning or writhing or squeezing even tighter.

  When Peter finally woke me in the evening, I had somehow moved so I was lying down.

  Ezra was still tangled up with me, his head resting on my stomach, but the fierceness in his grip had disappeared. Peter helped Ezra to the bathroom to eat and get cleaned up, and I got up to stretch. I would never admit it openly, but my whole body ached terribly from the way he held me.

  Peter came out of the bathroom to give Ezra privacy. I was standing next to the bed, feeling more emotionally drained than I ever had before. Comforting him had been more exhausting than I had thought anything could be. Peter looked at me knowingly, but I didn’t feel like I deserved any concern, so I tried to busy myself with straightening up the room.

  “Alice,” Peter gently said and placed his hand on my arm, stopping me in my tracks. “How are you holding up?”

  “Better than Ezra,” I gave a hollow laugh.

  Stupidly, I looked up at Peter, and I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Unwanted tears started streamed down my cheeks, and roughly, Peter pulled me into his arms. Burying my face in his shirt, I sobbed hard, desperate to get it all out before Ezra came out of the bathroom. He hugged me tightly, and there are times in life where nothing feels better than being held. Ezra could attest to that.

  “Thanks. And sorry,” I mumbled when I managed to get myself under control and pull away from Peter. He kept his hand on my arm, as if severing contact with me completely would reduce me to tears.

  “Don’t worry about it. I saw how hard that was on you,” Peter reassured me as I wiped the tears from my face.

  “He’s not even crying.” I hated myself for being a baby. Ezra had clearly been through much worse, and he wasn’t acting like me.

  “It’s different for him. He’s been through this before, although I don’t think it’s ever been this bad.

  I’ve never seen anything like this with him.” Peter’s eyes got hard, no doubt thinking about how this was his fault.

  “What do you mean he’s been through this before?” My head shot up, looking at him sharply.

  “That’s what his old ‘master’ used to do, Willem, and he was a bad, bad man,” Peter explained, staring off into space. “But Willem was just one man, not a pack of rabid monsters. I’ve been bit before, by something less than them, and it’s…”

  “What?” I pressed when Peter trailed off into silence.

  “My blood burned coursing in my veins. My body tried to reject it, and I was mostly drained as it was.

  But it was all tainted, and I was trying to get rid of it. Physically, it’s almost bad as turning.

  And on top of that, the emotions it gives you. It makes you want things you don’t want. You feel disgusting and

  ….” Peter shook his head, unwilling to elaborate further. “It’s torture, absolutely. And he went through several times what I went through.”

  “Will he be okay?” I asked plaintively, not enjoying Peter’s far off expression.

  I’m not sure how Peter would’ve answered because Ezra came out of the bathroom, changing our attention completely. He looked much better than he had before, but he definitely didn’t look good. He had changed his clothes, and the marks on his neck and wrist had finally healed. His skin was still pale and his expression grave, but he was moving around okay.

  He barely said anything to either of us on the way to the airport. I saw how rigid he was, and he was struggling to hold back what pain was left. On the plane, I sat in between him and Peter, and he mumbled several apologies to me, all of which I brushed off. I had barely done anything for him, and it was nothing that he wouldn’t do for me. He just wasn’t used to being the weak one, the dependant one, and I think he was ashamed of being caught in that position. If anything, the whole thing made me gain even more respect for him. Whatever made him crack at all had to be so horrendous that it would’ve killed anybody else, but he had pulled through it. On the rest of the flight back to America, he kept his eyes shut tightly and his lips pressed together. I couldn’t stop staring at him, though, terrified he would fall apart or die if I did.

  Chapter 9

  By the time we landed at the Minneapolis airport, Ezra had returned to something that resembled his normal self. Admittedly, a very subdued version, but he could talk and walk without grimacing. His body wasn’t tensed up at high alert anymore. Thanks to my preoccupation with Ezra, I hadn’t texted anyone at home to let them know that we were coming. Even Peter hadn’t thought to call them, but he rarely talked to any of them, so it wouldn’t occur to him anyway.

  We took a cab home, deciding that a surprise return was probably better at this point. Jack would be too happy to see me to really be angry. Once he found out everyt
hing that happened, I’m sure he’d be pretty pissed off, but he lacked the ability to really hang on to anger for any length of time. As soon as the cab pulled into the driveway, I could hear Matilda barking inside the house, and it was still weird getting used to my improved hearing.

  Ezra climbed out of the cab carefully. Peter grabbed our bags out of the trunk, even though I was perfectly capable of carrying them myself, but I was too excited to mind. As soon as we’d touched down in Minneapolis, I had started feeling this pull in my heart. After days and days of a dull ache at being away from Jack, it screamed with pleasure, knowing how close he was. It was all I could do keep from running through the front door… then I realized that I could run and saw no reason not to.

  I dashed through the front door, knowing that Ezra and Peter were following me at much slower pace. After spending so long getting trampled by Matilda every time I came in, I brushed past her, knocking her fluffy white body over. Jack had just rounded the corner to the entryway, his blue eyes wide with surprise.

  There was this odd nervousness that hit me as I suddenly became afraid he wasn’t as happy to see me as I was to see him. I stopped where I was, smiling sheepishly at him, then he broke out in a gigantic smile and his eyes sparkled. That was all the encouragement I needed.

  I dove into Jack’s arms, wrapping my arms tightly around his neck. He caught me easily, holding me to him with that perfect warmth he always did. I could feel his heart beating through my chest, and that was the connection I had been so sorely missing. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, I felt complete and contended again. Squeezing my eyes shut on happy tears, I wanted to stay that way forever.

  Then I felt Jack’s muscles tense around me, and I realized that Peter had just walked in the house.

  From the side of me, I could hear Mae and Ezra talking, but Peter didn’t say a word. I opened my eyes regretfully, knowing I would have to untangle myself with Jack and act in a civil manner around people. In truth, as close as he was, I didn’t feel close enough. I wanted to cover him in kisses and… and well, a lot more than that. Instead, I’d have to deal with the whole Jack and Peter thing.

  As I mentally prepared myself for that scene, I looked over Jack’s shoulder to a whole other surprise.

  Standing directly behind us looking curiously at the scene unfolding was my brother Milo and some kid I had never seen before. I use the term “kid” loosely. He was probably older than me, with black hair falling across his forehead and almost an olive skin tone. Shorter than Milo had even been as a human, he had tattoos visible on his chest below the low v-neck of his shirt and all down his arms. Sure, he was foxy, but that wasn’t even what caught my attention. If I hadn’t been so distracted in my excitement over Jack I would’ve noticed it sooner.

  His veins were pulsing with hot blood, human blood. It was all I could smell and hear, and I realized belatedly that it had been twelve hours since I ate last. Spending all that time with people lately had left me with more self-control than I before, but I wasn’t accustomed to it in my own home. Here the only blood was vampire or dog, and neither of those really appealed to me, except for Jack’s.

  “Who is that?” I hissed, finally releasing Jack so he would lower me to the ground. Milo moved protectively in front of that kid, which made something flare.

  “That’s Bobby,” Jack explained. He had put me on the ground, but he kept an arm looped around my waist, and I doubt it was just because he missed me. Tension from Peter along with my confused reaction to this Bobby person made the room feel unstable. “I told you about him on the phone.

  Remember?”

  “You didn’t tell me he was human,” I sniffed, crossing my arms over my chest.

  “You were human like ten seconds ago,” Milo rolled his eyes.

  Bobby peered nervously around Milo at him, and I realized that it wasn’t his species difference that offended me so much. This was the first time Milo had ever brought a guy, of any distinction, home. On top of that, I had been away when it happened, and this kid was older and had tattoos. Some kind of maternal instinct had reared its head.

  “I couldn’t tell you very much about anything since you wouldn’t answer my calls or return my texts,” Jack pointed out icily, and he glanced back at Peter.

  Peter was still carrying all our bags and stood awkwardly by the front door. Matilda was sniffing him up, wagging her tail happily, but nobody else acknowledged him at all. Ezra looked a million times better than he had when he first stumbled back to the hotel, but he was still clearly unwell. Besides that, I’m sure Mae could smell the other vampires on him. She was more tuned into his scent than I was, and I could still smell something, dank and musty and unpleasant. Touching his face gingerly, she looked up at him with sad tears in her eyes, oblivious to the ever growing unease in the room.

  “Come on,” Milo gestured to the other room. “You’ve all had a long trip. I’m sure you guys wanna come back and relax for a bit, and fill us all in with all the juicy details.”

  Milo started leading the way to the living room, deliberating putting himself between Bobby and me.

  It was a whole new feeling to think of myself as a threat. Jack’s arm was still around me, and I suddenly remembered with some delight that I was with Jack. I smiled up at him, but he was slow to return it. His heart beat was louder than it should be, meaning something was distressing him. For a second, I was too filled with that ecstatic relief of just being near him to even worry about anything else at all.

  “I would really love to catch up with all of you. I missed you all so much,” Mae announced tiredly when we reached the leaving room. She smiled sadly at me and reached out to squeeze my arm lovingly. Ezra stood behind her, his expression still very drawn. “But I think that Ezra and I are going to have to excuse ourselves. He needs some rest.”

  “I understand,” I said, my voice tight.

  Ezra was still in pain, and that was an impossible thing to shake. As I watched them walk away, I felt Jack’s eyes settle seriously on me. Ezra’s level of anguish had made Jack suddenly very wary about what had gone in Finland. I avoided his gaze, knowing that I wasn’t ready to explain that to him, especially not in front of Milo and his new friend.

  Milo flopped back in an overstuffed chair. Bobby, who had remained glued to his side the entire time, sat on the arm of the chair next to him, half sitting on Milo’s lap. Something about that sight sent a ripple of agitation through me. Whereas Milo had always been very happy to encourage my romantic exploits, I became uncharacteristically protective. When Bobby put his hand on his thigh, I wanted to slap it away.

  “So…” Milo looked at me. “How was your trip?”

  “It was okay,” I shrugged, unwilling to give up anymore right now.

  Peter had walked over to lean against the wall, and Jack moved smoothly around me. At first I didn’t understand, then I realized that he was putting himself between Peter and me. This was the way things would go for awhile, and it was too early to already getting annoyed by them. Instead, I just walked over to the couch, where we would be sitting down and he wouldn’t be standing to block any advances Peter might make.

  “Since you brought Peter back, I assume it was a rousing success.” Milo looked at Peter out of the corner of his eye, trying not to make it obvious that he didn’t trust him at all. He’d only met him once, and that meeting hadn’t gone that great. On top of that, the only information he had about him came filtered through Jack, who had a pretty biased opinion on the subject.

  “You could say that,” I replied shortly.

  Jack was sitting next to me, and I wanted to snuggle up next to him, but everything felt so off. Peter glanced around the room diffidently, managing not to look happy or upset by the situation. I pulled my knees up to my chest and leaned in closer in the crook of Jack’s arm, but he was still unnaturally tense. He had no idea what had happened, and something was wrong with Ezra, so he wasn’t happy about the situation. I would’ve loved to ease his fears,
but I was completely preoccupied by this Bobby character that was all but sitting on my little brother’s lap. I know I was currently curling up with my boyfriend, so I really had no right to judge his behavior, but I couldn’t help it.

  “It looks like you’ve had a pretty busy time without us,” I commented as casually as I could.

  “You could say that,” Milo laughed.

  He looked up at Bobby, sharing one of this disgustingly sweet looks that made the bile rise in my throat. Then Bobby leaned down and kissed him on the lips, and I could hear his heart race faster. My stomach twisted in knots, out of disgust and hunger, and I didn’t appreciate that combination at all. Don’t get me wrong: It was not the fact that Milo was kissing a dude that I found so upsetting. It was that he was kissing anyone. Even after becoming a vampire, there were still so many things I was unprepared for.

  “I think I’m gonna crash,” Peter said randomly. He looked over at Jack, which I found astonishingly disconcerting, and Jack’s arm tightened around me, as if he really expected Peter to tear me from his arms. “Is my room in the same place?”

  “It’s exactly as you left it,” Jack replied crossly.

  “Alright.” Peter nodded at Jack, then he turned and darted up the stairs.

  “That guys has weird vibes,” Bobby remarked, speaking for the first time since I’d met him.

  He stared after the space where Peter had been, then shook his head to toss his bangs out of his dark eyes. As if to comfort him, Milo rubbed his back, and Bobby smiled, settling back into the chair with him.

  Is it too early to say that I really hate Bobby?

  “So Bobby?” I asked, and he turned back to me, smiling clumsily. I decided to dispense with the small talk immediately. “Are you gay?” Jack laughed, filling me with a familiar glee. Once Peter had left, he had managed to relax a bit.

  “Alice!” Milo snapped, embarrassed.

  “What?” I asked innocently.