by M. K. Dawn
“I was not…” I go to deny it, but at this point, I’m too damn tired. And it’s nice to have someone to talk to. It hadn’t been until that moment that I realized how much I miss Gina. Screw it. If I’m going to survive in this place, I’m going to have to learn to trust people and to make friends. “I don’t know what to do or how to shake it. Or, more accurately, shake him. I’m feeling things that I have never felt before. After everything I’ve been told, I know it’s wrong. But my heart longs for him, breaks every time he walks away. It’s insane, we’ve only just met, and really, the first twenty-four hours he didn’t exactly make the best impression, with the stalking and kidnapping. But somewhere between running from Kakos and making our way here…”
She drags me into a hug. “Oh, sweetie, I know this is hard. Does it make you feel any better knowing he’s having just as hard of a time?”
I laugh at the absurdness of her statement. “I wish I could believe you. He seems to have a lot more self-control than I do. He brought Henry to me. He walked away without a second glance. I’m sure he’s fine.”
Anastasia sweeps her hand over the top of my head. “Whatever you need to tell yourself to sleep at night.”
Chapter Sixteen
Brady
I step out of my tent in hopes the cool night breeze will help calm my nerves. Alaina should be back soon; it’s been hours since I handed her over to Henry. The distance has been brutal. The way I left her, all alone with Henry, has driven me fucking crazy all night. I try to convince myself it's because I have taken a sworn oath to protect her and leaving her with people I hardly trust goes against my very nature.
Who am I kidding? The way she was mesmerized by Eric, forgetting I was there, caused such a pain in my heart I thought it might explode. I can’t even imagine what it will be like to watch her marry Henry. Maybe I can resign before that happens. Though leaving the warriors any way other than retirement or death would be considered dishonorable. I would be banished from the kingdom, never to return. I would never see Alaina again. Could I live with that?
No fucking way.
I let out a slow, deep breath. I can’t help but worry about how dinner is going; if she’s holding it together. The only thought that brings me any sort of comfort is knowing Ana is with her if she needs someone to lean on.
Alaina was so angry when I introduced her to Henry. It's not like I had a say in the matter. After our little standoff, I headed for my tent, desperate for some sleep. But before I got there, I ran into Henry. He insisted I take him to her at once. Such a bossy bastard.
After that, I was too on edge to sleep. So, I wandered around the camp and checked on my soldiers. As the leader of the warriors, I also oversee the Kardia army. The warriors, under my direction, co-lead their own divisions: Combat - Nick and Hawk), Weaponry - Tom and Bo, Medical - JD and Clint, and Intel - Ace and Xavier. This system has been in place since the beginning. It helps ensure that no one part of our military is left without a leader.
As I walked around camp inspecting each division, I spotted Anastasia working in the armory. As the daughter of a warrior, she grew up around most of these men, so it was only natural for her to become a soldier. That, and being a badass with a sword. I watched her for a minute, cutting up with the others. Most brothers would probably try to shelter their little sister from this life, but not me. I’m damn proud of the woman she has become. It’s a great comfort, knowing she can take care of herself.
After a brief embrace, she bombarded me with a ton of questions. She wanted to know everything about the past month, making me regret not going straight to my tent.
I tried to escape, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. There was no use fighting it. Once she sets her mind on something, nothing will get in her way.
When we reached my tent, I collapsed on the bed and tried my best to pretend to sleep, but her ever-watchful eyes were on me, like a predator tracking its prey. Finally, I gave in and told her the condensed story, making sure to leave out all the intimate details. It made no difference. Ana saw right through it.
***
“So, you were sent to rescue the princess and you ended up falling in love with her. Real smart there, Brady.”
“What? Where did that even come from?” I put on an innocent face.
“Oh, big brother, I can read you like a book. You get this little twinkle in your eyes whenever you say her name.”
“That's ridiculous. I’m not in love with her, only attracted to her. It’s the damsel in distress syndrome. Plus, she’s fucking hot.”
“Whatever you say, bro.”
“Ana, drop it. Whatever I do or do not feel for Alaina, it doesn’t matter. She’s the princess, she has to marry Henry to unite the kingdoms... blah, blah, blah.”
“Ha! There it is, right there. You like her! Score one for me.” Her teasing wore on my nerves.
“Can you do me a favor?” There was no use arguing.
“You know I will.”
“I’m sure Henry has invited her to eat with him in his tent. She’ll accept, not that she has a choice. This whole situation is taking a toll on her. Will you please go over there and offer your assistance?”
“Sure. I’ll head over there now.”
“Thanks. Oh, and sis, when no one’s around, call her Alaina.”
“What? Are you serious? You know what the penalty is for outwardly disrespecting royalty.”
“Don’t worry. She’s already asked all the warriors to call her that in private. If she starts to freak out, which she probably will, call her by her name. It will help her relax and trust you. She’s not entirely sold on the whole lost princess thing, and just between you and me, I’m not entirely sold as well. She has memories that she shouldn’t have. She transported us to the healer's house and knew things that there is no way she could have known.”
“Are you questioning her lineage? Ordin, and now Eric, have tracked her since she crossed into to the human realm. I think you’re reading into things. Talk to Eric, I’m sure he can explain everything.”
“I know, I know… still, there’s something off. I can’t put my finger on it.”
“Brady, is it possible you’re just hoping that she isn’t the princess for your own selfish reasons? Ever since she died, you’ve had your fair share of women come in and out of your bed, but you’ve never let yourself feel anything for them. Now, for some reason, you’ve let your guard down with this girl. And, in doing that, your heart is allowing you to experience things you aren’t used to feeling.”
“Yeah, or a better explanation is that she is fucking hot, and I haven’t gotten laid in a while.”
Ana rolled her eyes. “Whatever you have to tell yourself to sleep at night.”
I watched her walk away, annoyed that she was probably right.
***
Alaina and Ana’s laughter brings me back to the present. It’s nice to see Alaina so relaxed, more relaxed than I’ve seen her since I came into her life. She looks up and our eyes meet. My heart races, betraying my head. I fight the urge to hold her in my arms and instead give them my best ‘I’m relaxed and nothing is bothering me’ smile as they walk up. “Hey, how was dinner?”
Alaina’s smile doesn’t quite touch her eyes. “Fine. It was fine.”
“Yep, she did well.” Ana nudges Alaina in the side. “Only had one little meltdown.”
Alania gives her a nasty look. “Traitor.”
“Hey, what can I say, he’s my brother and he was worried about you.”
I grin.
“Don’t give me that smug little look, Brady. Alaina and I are now friends, which means that’s the last little tidbit of information you will get from me about her unless her life is in danger.”
With Ana’s declaration, Alaina scrunches up her nose and sticks her tongue out at me.
“Real mature, Princess.” I step closer to her.
“Oh, because you’re just the model of maturity, Warrior.” She, too, takes a step forward. We’re
so close a slight breeze could knock us into each other.
Neither of us breaks eye contact, both too stubborn to back away. The tension ignites a fire in my stomach that races straight to my groin. Alaina lets out a deep sigh and my breath hitches. Desire burns in her eyes. The need to touch her, to kiss her, consumes me. She bites her lower lip and I almost lose what little control I have left.
As I bend down to touch my lips to hers - fuck the consequences - Ana steps between us. “Alright, children. Enough. Everyone take two steps back. Brady, as the head of the warriors, it’s your job to make sure Alaina’s tent is secure. Can you handle that or is it too much for you two to be so close to a bed alone?”
The trance is broken. Alaina blushes and whips her head away to avoid my eyes.
Before either of us has a chance to answer, Ana continues. “No? I didn’t think so. All three of us will go in together. Brady, you will ensure everything is safe, and I will help Alaina get cleaned up and ready for bed. Don’t think either of you needs to be around each other during the naked phase.”
“Real tactful, sis.”
“Hey! I just watched you too practically eye-fu…” She throws her hand over her mouth. “I’m so sorry, Your Highness. That was way over the line.”
Alaina rolls her neck. “Please don’t apologize. I’m not offended. Humiliated, but not offended. You actually remind me a lot of my best friend back at home, always honest to a fault.”
“Oh Gods, again I’m so sorry. I know, it’s none of my business. Except that it kind of is because Brady is my brother and you are kind of screwing with his heart.”
“Okay, that’s enough.” I corral them through the door. “No one is screwing with anyone’s heart.”
As Alaina looks around, I grab Ana’s arm and pull her aside. “Listen, I get you’re worried, but this is none of your business. Nothing is going on between Alaina and myself.”
“But…”
“No buts. What you saw out there is not going to happen again - ever. It’s just stupid hormones. Nothing else.”
A sniffle catches my attention. Alaina’s beautiful face is wet with tears. I’m an idiot to say that in here, of all places. I should have known she would be listening. Her pain touches my soul to the point my body to physically aches. Without thinking, I pull her into my chest and kiss her forehead. “Don’t do that, baby. It’s going to be okay. We both know we have to walk away from whatever is between us. You have to give Henry a chance.”
Her sobs dampen my chest. “It’s all too much. There’s nothing there between us, no spark, and no chemistry. I hate this place, I hate the laws, and I hate that people think I’m the princess. I want to go back. I want to be the orphan girl again who was about to start college. I want to be free to love who I want to love, and do what I want to do, and I want people to call me by my name.” We stand there wrapped in each other’s arms. I hold her as tight as I can without suffocating her. I glance back at Ana, whose face is wet with tears as well. I lift my eyebrow to question her sudden onset of emotions. She just shrugs.
“You need rest,” I whisper. “Everything will look better tomorrow. I promise.”
She nods and loosens her grip around my waist.
Ana comes over and wraps her arm around Alaina. “Come on, a hot bath and a soft bed will do wonders for your heart.” Alaina nods again weakly.
I do a quick inspection until I’m satisfied everything is as is should be.
A few minutes later Ana returns with a distressed look on her face. “I’ve set her up in a hot bath. Poor thing started sobbing as soon as her body hit the water. I couldn’t catch everything she was saying, just phrases like can’t be real, all a dream, I want to go home, I miss my friends, stupid betrothal.”
“Yeah, she’s having a hard time adjusting. The human world is all she knows.”
“That makes no sense. She should have memories, she lived here long enough.”
“Ordin placed a memory block on her.”
“I recognize that, but what I don't understand is why hasn’t Eric removed it? Shouldn’t that be his number one priority? And more importantly, why wasn’t the memory block set to break when Alaina crossed back over to Nysa?”
“That’s two of the numerous questions I have for Eric. As I told you earlier, things are not adding up. Do you mind staying for a while?”
Her face tenses. “Sure. Just one last question before you go?”
My Gods, can she not let anything go? “What now, Anastasia?”
“Oh, don't give me that. I’m worried about you, both of you, really. You’re a total wreck. She’s a total wreck. When you first got back I was just teasing you about falling in love but now I kind of think I wasn’t very far off.”
I give up and collapse on the chair, emotionally spent. Tired of keeping everything bottled up I recount the past two days to Ana including how it was Alaina who saved us, her weird memories, and our walk here that included a very passionate kiss. I spill it all.
“Wow. I don’t even know what else to say, just wow. I mean, it’s curious, how much her personality has changed. Come to think of it, even her name. Everyone called her Lane, remember? My Gods, she was such a diva as a child. Remember the one time she stole my doll, the pretty one with the fancy pink dress that Dad brought over for me? I chased her all through the castle trying to get it back. After about hour we ran into the Queen. I told her what happened, but of course, she took her daughter's side knowing very well that it wasn't hers. Such an awful woman! I don’t miss her one bit.”
“Ana, watch your mouth! You know you can't say shit like that.”
She rolls her eyes. “Fine. Gods rest her soul and blah, blah, blah.”
“Ana…” I give her a warning look. I would hate for Alaina to hear her talk so bad about her mother.
“Yes, I know. I won't speak another word about it! Anyway, like I was saying. Alaina is so sweet and demure now, nothing like the mother we all feared she would turn out to be. Do you think it's because of the block?”
“I honestly don't know.”
“Gods, I hope not. I’m really starting to like our little princess.”
Me too. “I’m going to go over to Eric’s.”
“Go. She’ll be fine. It seems you two need a break, anyway. The more you see each other, the worse it could get. Have one of the other guys look out for her for a while. Back off and let both of your hormones settle. Find a pretty girl and get laid.”
“Whatever, Ana, I got things under control. Alaina is my responsibility. I can handle it.” I jump out of the chair and storm off towards the door.
“Good Gods, you are so much like Dad - stubborn as hell,” she grumbles.
I ignore her and for good measure, yell back, “And I don’t need to get fucking laid.”
***
Even as I reach Eric’s tent, Ana’s laughter still rings in my ears. Maybe she’s right about finding another girl. It has been over a month since I had a woman in my bed; I’m well overdue. Usually, just the thought of a woman’s touch could get me going, but now, since Alaina entered my life, nothing.
“Brady?” I turn and see Eric trotting up. “You need something, brother?”
Eric and I have been friends most of our lives. He too grew up in the palace, being groomed from a very young age to be the next royal adviser, which he will officially become once Alaina is crowned. Part of his job is to pull and read prophecies. At the ripe age of four, Eric was there with his mentor, Ordin, in the Prophetic Room when the princess was born and the new prophecy was pulled. Her destiny is clear; she is to save our kingdom by defeating Wright. And those around her are to do anything we can to make sure that becomes a reality.
Which is why, when we received word of Wright’s plans to attack, it was decided that Alaina should be sent to the human realm with no memories and only a few select soldiers, posing as humans, to watch over her. The soldier would go in with his or her family and pose as a foster home. At first, it was too dangerous for Alai
na to stay in one place too long, so we would bring in a different family and shuffle her around. This continued until we could secure our people - Meel and Siple - at New Ridge. There, we were able to give her the stability she needed until her nineteenth birthday. But with Wright’s men closing in on her location, we thought it best to bring her back earlier than planned.
Again, something didn’t add up. “Why nineteen, Eric?”
“What?” My question catches him off guard.
“The royals have no significant powers that emerge at the age of nineteen. It’s their bloodlines’ sacrifice for being noble. So, I ask you again, why would we have to wait to bring her here until after her nineteenth birthday?” I hadn't realized how loud I was until several sets of eyes fell on us.
“Let’s take this inside, shall we?” Eric heads inside his tent and I follow.
The only way you would know someone lived in here is the small bed pushed against the wall. Even that is covered in papers. Eric sits at the head of his massive table, which is set in the middle of the room, maps of all the Nysian kingdoms laid out on top of it.
Nysa is divided up into five sections. Our kingdom, Kardia, which means heart in the ancient language, is by far the largest. Henry comes from Aletheia, truth, and is only a little smaller than Kardia. Wright’s kingdom of Nikao, to conquer, is about half the size of ours. The last two are more sanctums than kingdoms. Hagion, a pure place of God, is where people go who feel like their life’s sole purpose is to serve the Gods. Eleutheros, free of restraint, is for people who do not want to live under royals.
I glance over the maps and check out the progress of the war. The maps of Hagion and Eleutheros are off to the side. The devoutly religious and the free people have refused to take sides and thus left alone by Wright. I fear that will not always be the case.