by Sarah Bailey
“You smell different.”
She pulled away, staring up at him in confusion.
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. There’s just something different. It’s like an extra layer that wasn’t there before.”
Her stomach dropped. Realisation dawned on her. Why hadn’t she kept track? I’m an idiot. How could this happen? There was no way in hell she was telling him what she suspected. How on earth could she land him with that bombshell?
There was no other explanation. The sickness and now her change in scent. She needed to know for sure.
“It’s probably just because I’ve been around Eli and Felise.”
No. That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever told him.
But how do I do this?
How do I tell Rex I’m pregnant?
Chapter Twenty
Two days later she sat on the edge of the bath, tears streaming down her face. The positive test sat discarded on the floor. Rex had gone to work. Until they’d worked out what to do about Eli, she couldn’t risk going to work at The Werehouse. And now she was pregnant. She was sure it was Rex’s because she’d had her period not long after Alan had broken her jaw. That was the last time she’d slept with anyone else, even if it’d been against her will. She’d been so caught up in her new life as a shifter, she’d forgotten to keep taking the pill.
I’m a fucking idiot. We should’ve been taking precautions. She’d been so careful when she’d been an escort. All her clients used condoms. She’d made sure of it.
She couldn’t tell Rex. How could she? They hadn’t been together very long. He’d never been with a shifter. Neither of them were ready to be parents. Not with everything else going on. She was only twenty-four! This was the worst possible timing. Was their baby going to be a shifter?
Fuck. She couldn’t deal with this. Nothing could prepare her for it. She grabbed the positive test and hid it in her toiletries bag. She hoped he wouldn’t look in it, but she couldn’t get rid of it. It made it real. She needed the reminder that it was actually happening.
Trudging back through into the bedroom, she grabbed her phone and called the one person she’d been avoiding for weeks.
“Izz… I didn’t think you were talking to me anymore.”
“I’m sorry, Hannah. Things have been crazy.”
“It’s okay. What’s up?”
“I need a friend right now.”
“Is everything all right?”
“No.”
She held back the tears. Her life was one huge mess. All she wanted was a hug.
“Do you want me to come over?”
“Only if you’re not busy. I don’t want to impose.”
“You know it would never be an imposition from you. Just text me your address, okay? I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
They hung up and she texted Hannah Rex’s address. There was nothing else she could do. Half an hour later, Hannah arrived complete with a bag of KFC. She dumped it on the coffee table before enfolding Izzy in a hug.
“I’ve missed you, babe.”
“Me too.”
They sat on the sofa together, Hannah pulling out the food. Izzy wasn’t sure if she would bring this up after she ate it, but she would try anyway. They ate in silence for a while.
“So, you live with him now then?” Hannah asked as she put her coke down.
“Yes. We’ve said the L word too.”
Hannah’s eyes widened and she squealed.
“Oh my god! When? How?”
“Um, a couple of days ago. It was kind of in the moment.”
“That’s so cute. I’m happy for you.”
Izzy swallowed hard before stuffing more chips in her mouth. She needed a moment before she told Hannah her other news. She needed to tell someone even though Hannah wasn’t part of the shifter world. It wouldn’t matter anyway. She’d learnt from Gareth that shifter kids don’t change until after they go through puberty. Their kid would be normal for most of its childhood. It still didn’t make her feel any better about the situation.
“So… I take it that’s not what you asked me here to tell me.”
Izzy looked at her hands.
“I’m… pregnant, Hannah.”
The silence was deafening for several long minutes. When she finally looked up, Hannah was staring at her with eyes as wide as saucers.
“Does… does he know?” she asked.
“No.”
“What the fuck? How did this happen?”
“I forgot to take the pill after I broke up with Alan. Things have just been insane and it slipped my mind. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
Hannah sat back.
“Fuck.”
“I know.”
“Are you going to keep it?”
The question hit her like a sucker punch to the gut. She put her hand on her stomach. There was a tiny being growing inside her. How could she ever destroy that?
“Yes.”
The reality of the situation well and truly sank in. She couldn’t get rid of it. Not even if Rex didn’t want to be a part of their lives. Her entire focus shifted in the instant she knew for sure she was having a baby. She would protect it with her life. And now there was no way she could bind herself to Eli. Not now she had another person who would rely on her for everything. She couldn’t take that risk.
“Shit. Are you going to tell Rex?”
“I’m going to have to. He’ll notice when I start showing.”
“The stuff with Alan happened like three months ago, right?”
“Yes… I guess I’m probably a couple of months along now. I don’t know. I have to go to the doctor.”
“Do you want me to go with you?”
“No, it’s okay.”
Hannah put her hand on Izzy’s arm.
“It’ll be all right, babe. I’m sure he’ll be happy when you tell him. I know it’s soon, but you love each other, right?”
Izzy nodded. She wasn’t sure it would be okay but she didn’t want to worry Hannah.
Hannah stayed for a few hours until Rex came home and found them on the sofa together. Izzy paled. Knowing she’d have to have the conversation she was dreading. Hannah said her goodbyes, telling Rex to take care of her best friend before she left the two of them alone. He kissed the top of her head before he sat down.
“Are you okay?”
“Rex, we need to talk.”
“Okay. About what?”
She didn’t know where to start. Looking down at her hands, she fidgeted. She needed to just spit it out. There was no point beating around the bush. She swallowed before taking a deep breath.
“You know you said that my scent has changed…”
“Yes.”
“There’s a rea—”
Rex’s phone rang, interrupting her. He dug it out of his pocket, frowning.
“I have to take this, sorry.”
He pressed to answer.
“Hello, Dalia… What? You’ve got to be kidding me… Right… Okay, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
He hung up, immediately getting up and pulling his coat back on.
“We need to go.”
“What? Why?”
This was the last thing she needed. An interruption right when she was going to tell him she was having his baby. He looked concerned, which meant it was important.
“The queen found out about Felise. We need to deal with the situation between the fae and Eli.”
§
They met Dalia and her wolf pack in a large clearing in Richmond Park. The queen and her entourage were standing some way off. In the centre of everything were Felise and Eli. He was standing in front of her, fierce protection in his eyes.
Izzy flinched when his gaze flickered over her. He looked furious for a moment before his eyes fell on his brother. Rex stiffened, his arm tightening around her. Eli’s expression became pained. Izzy looked up at Rex. His eyes mirrored Eli’s. The last time they’d been together, they’d fou
ght and one of them had spent five years thinking the other was dead.
Her hand went to her stomach instinctively. She didn’t want that for her unborn child if he or she was ever to have a sibling. Eli’s eyes shifted to her, following her movements before he frowned deeply. She dropped her hand, curling into Rex’s side. Eli’s eyes met hers again. He knew. She could tell by the flash of shock in his eyes. She shook her head. I need him to keep his mouth shut about it until I can tell Rex myself.
Eli looked away, staring at the wolf pack instead. She turned back to Rex. He was staring at the ground.
“Are you all right?” she whispered.
“I didn’t think seeing him again would hurt so much,” he said, his voice low.
She rubbed his back, trying to soothe him.
“It doesn’t have to end the way you think it does.”
Whilst she couldn’t bind herself to Eli, they could find another way to keep his brother from dying. Only if that’s what Rex wanted. She had no real clue.
“It’s the only way. Our father ruined him. There’s no coming back from what he’s done. I wish I could explain it, Izzy. I wish I could tell you why Eli became the monster he is.”
“Then try.”
“Now isn’t the time.”
When will it be time? She was tired of him keeping secrets from her. And yet she was keeping the biggest one of all from him. This was going to end badly. Tonight would change everything. She wasn’t sure if it was for the better or for the worse.
The queen and the man she’d been with at ObliVion approached them. She was as beautiful as she had been then. Her hair flowed down her back in waves, her pale dress fluttered in the wind and the silver crown on her head gleamed in the moonlight.
“Greetings, Alpha,” she said to Dalia.
“Queen Gwilliana,” Dalia replied, bowing her head.
“He will not listen to reason. Felise has broken our laws by revealing our secrets. She must be punished.”
“I understand. We’ve been cleaning up their messes for months.”
“He will not give her up.”
The queen glanced over at Eli and Felise again. Her eyes flickered with regret.
“Let me talk to him,” Izzy said, stepping forward.
“No,” Rex growled.
“What good is us standing around here talking about them going to do?”
“I don’t trust him.”
“Then come with me or don’t.”
Izzy pulled her arm away from him before he could object and strode towards where Eli and Felise were standing. She knew Rex had followed her. She stopped a few feet away when she felt his hand on her shoulder.
“Izzy, what are you doing?” he hissed.
“Sorting out this ridiculous situation unlike everyone else.”
She looked up at him. The man she loved fiercely stared back at her, caution in his expression.
“One way or another, this ends tonight.”
He nodded at her, squeezing her shoulder tight before he let go. She turned to Eli and Felise.
“You know why we’re all here.”
“Yes,” Eli replied.
“Then you know that fighting both the fae and the wolf pack is suicide.”
She took a step towards him.
“I know I told you I wouldn’t leave, but you understand why I cannot do what you’ve asked of me.”
She placed her hand on her stomach again, hoping that Rex wouldn’t notice the gesture. Eli glanced down for a moment.
“It makes no odds to me. I need your life force to survive. Felise knows how to complete the ritual.”
She paled. All he cared about was himself. It made her heart harden. He didn’t deserve her trying to resolve this situation peacefully, but she would try no matter what.
“You’d really do this knowing what it could do to me?”
“Yes. I told you, we chose you for a reason even if you were stupid enough to fall in love with my brother.”
Rex growled from behind her but she put her hand up. Now was not the time.
“You never did explain why it has to be me.”
“Endurance, Izzy. You were beaten down to a shell of yourself and yet you still survived. You are strong, in body, heart and spirit. You will survive the process.”
“I never asked for this. I didn’t want to be a panther, nor did I want to bind myself to anyone for life.”
Eli simply shrugged as if her wants and needs meant nothing.
“If you don’t stop this, then you’ll leave me no choice but to allow them to kill both of you. Do you want that?”
“I don’t care if you do or you don’t. You will complete the ritual.”
She looked back at Rex, defeat in her eyes. She didn’t want an audience for this. She wanted it to be the two of them. There was nothing for it. Rex wouldn’t let Eli do this if he knew. She took a step towards him, her heart in her mouth.
“I won’t do it, Eli. You know why I won’t do it, but you’re making it impossible for me because he doesn’t know.”
She didn’t look back at Rex’s brother. Rex frowned as she reached for him, taking his hand in hers.
“Rex,” she whispered. “What I was trying to tell you before Dalia rang…. It’s important. I didn’t want to tell you like this.”
“What is it, Izz?”
The confusion and concern in his eyes made her falter. The words got stuck in her throat. How do I say this? How? When I know everyone can hear me. Her heart ached. If Rex rejected this, it would break her. She needed him and so did their unborn child. There was nothing for it. She had to make Rex understand why she could never bind herself to Eli even if it would save his brother. He’d said Eli was a monster, but she wasn’t sure he really wanted his brother dead.
But no matter what she did, the words wouldn’t come out. She let go of his hand, turning back to Eli. There was something else she could do. She could find out the answers to the secrets the man she loved had been keeping from her.
“What did your father do to you two?”
Chapter Twenty One
Eli’s eyes flashed with anger for a moment.
“What did he not do?” he seethed.
“Izzy,” Rex said. “What are you doing? I told you now isn’t the time for this conversation.”
She ignored him. She wanted the truth. One of them was going to tell her whether they liked it or not.
“He drove our mother to an early grave, that’s what he did,” Eli said.
“That didn’t mean you had to kill him,” Rex retorted.
“Oh, so now you’re going to speak to me.”
Wait, what? Eli had killed their father?
“And what, Eli? I thought you were dead!”
“Because you almost fucking killed me. Felise brought me back from the brink.”
Izzy tensed. She hadn’t meant to force them into talking to each other. She just wanted to deflect the attention away from her. She knew it was wrong but telling Rex she was having his baby was proving harder than she’d anticipated.
“You deserve nothing less. You wouldn’t listen to reason. All that blood on your hands can never be washed away. Was decimating our entire family worth it? You killed everyone, even our cousin’s children and for what?”
Izzy’s heart contracted, a wave of pain assaulting her at his words. How could anyone kill their entire family? This was far worse than she’d imagined.
“He tried to kill you. He blamed you for her death and he hated you because she thought the world of you. I did it for you.”
Rex stepped around Izzy, his face hard, fists clenched at his sides.
“I didn’t ask you to kill our entire family for me. I wanted the beatings to stop just as much as you did, but that didn’t mean you had to destroy everything. And then you tried to kill me, your own brother with fucking silver! Do you have any idea how much that hurt?”
Her heart was in her mouth. This was why Eli was a monster in Rex’s eyes. And now she
knew how he’d got his scars. His brother had given them to him. Nausea coiled in her stomach. Oh, fuck, not now. I can’t be sick now.
“I did what I had to do. They all ruined her. None of them stopped him. She’s gone. The only person who loved us unconditionally is gone.”
Rex’s shoulders drooped. Izzy reached out, putting a hand on his arm. He flinched but didn’t push her away.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
He turned back to look at her, his eyes full of unshed tears. She hadn’t realised how much Rex kept bottled up inside him. Before her was a man she didn’t recognise. His expression almost broke her. Agony flashed through his features.
“She couldn’t take his abuse,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “She killed herself. Eli found her in a pool of her own blood. She slit her own throat with a silver-tipped blade.”
Izzy’s heart broke for him. For Eli. For everything they’d been through. Their entire lives had been shaped by that one event. All of this pain. All the resentment which lay between them. It was all because of their mother. Despite all of that, Rex was still kind and gentle. He loved her like no one else.
“I’m sorry,” she said again, tears falling down her cheeks unheeded. “I’m sorry.”
He reached up, brushing them away.
“You deserved to know. I shouldn’t have kept this from you for so long. It’s not your fault,” he whispered. “I told you. It was always going to end the same way. We can’t exist in this world together. Not after what he’s done.”
“And you’re so innocent. You almost murdered your own sibling,” Eli spat.
Rex tensed. He brushed Izzy’s cheek before leaning down and planting a soft kiss on her forehead. He pulled back, staring down at her with an intensity that almost made her knees buckle.
“I love you. Remember that.”
He dropped his hand, turned and strode towards his brother.
“Rex, don’t,” Izzy said, running after him.
The first blow knocked Eli sideways. Felise jumped out of the way. Her eyes met Izzy’s. She looked resigned. She knew she would be punished regardless of whether Eli lived or died. Izzy faltered as the brothers traded fists, circling each other.
“Stop it,” she said.