A Place Called Home

by Dilly Court

  Lucy looked down at the tiny hand and saw with something of a shock that Jenny was wearing a wedding ring. She recovered quickly, not wanting to offend the small person. ‘I’d better hurry. I don’t want to be late on my first day.’ Realising the implication of what she had just said, she felt herself blushing. ‘I – I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that we weren’t walking fast enough . . .’ She broke off, too embarrassed to continue.

  ‘It’s all right, my dear,’ Jenny said, trilling with laughter. ‘I’m a midget and so is my husband Obadiah, and our two little ones, Johnnie and Jim. We’re used to being looked at, and laughed at too. We’re circus folk and we entertain people.’

  ‘You look too young to have babies.’

  ‘I’m twenty-three and my elder boy is four.’ Jenny came to a halt as they arrived outside the big top. ‘There it is. Good luck, girl.’

  ‘Thank you.’ Lucy entered the vast tent with her head held high and her heart thudding within the confines of her tightly laced stays. Monty came striding towards her and to her dismay she could see Bertram seated in the front row. Above them a scantily dressed man was negotiating a tightrope, balancing himself with a long pole clutched in his hands. What was even more disturbing was the sight of a young man leading a large black horse which pranced and snorted, pawing the ground as if eager to be off on a long gallop.

  Monty followed her anxious glance with a wry smile. ‘Imperator is a bit lively this morning. Let’s see how you handle him, Lucy.’

  Almost before she knew what was happening he tossed her up onto the side saddle. The youth handed her the reins, backing away as Imperator began to move. The horse seemed to be dancing or marching to music that only he could hear, and at a command from Monty he raised himself on his hind legs, almost unseating Lucy. She managed to hold on and allowed him to trot around the ring, coming to a halt in front of Bertram, and as if knowing he was at the end of his brief performance, Imperator took a bow. Lucy had seen such feats at Astley’s but it was the first time she had ridden such a well-trained animal.

  Bertram leaned forward. He was silent for a moment, eyeing her up and down, and then he began to clap. ‘Well done. You are unfamiliar with your mount, but you have a good seat.’ He turned to his son. ‘She’ll do, Monty. I’ll leave it to you to work out a routine, but remember you only have a few weeks before the grand parade.’

  ‘Yes, Father. I’m well aware of that. We’ll be ready.’ Monty stepped forward. ‘Well done, Lucy.’ His smile and the sincerity in his voice went a long way to soothing her shattered nerves. How she had managed to remain in the saddle was something of a puzzle, for she was shaking inwardly, and she was afraid her legs might buckle under her if she tried to stand. However, Monty seemed impressed by her abilities, and he swung her to the ground as if they had just finished a performance and were about to take a bow.

  ‘Thank you, but I’m quite capable of mounting and dismounting on my own,’ she said stiffly.

  ‘You won’t have a mounting block in the ring, so I’ll help you to dismount. It goes with the act.’

  ‘We perform together?’

  ‘Yes, in the second half we do. You have your own spot in the first half. Are you worried that I’ll steal the limelight from you?’

  ‘No, that’s not the case at all. But I would like to know exactly what is expected of me. You seem to think that I have a crystal ball like Froniga.’

  Bertram rose from his seat. ‘You sound like an old married couple and you’ve only just met. You must sort it out between you, but I’m going to have my breakfast. I hope Stella hasn’t burned the bacon. She was in one of her moods this morning, Monty. I think she was hoping to be your new partner, so you’d best make your peace with her, my boy. My digestion won’t stand up to ruined food.’ He walked off across the ring, pausing to talk to the tightrope artiste, who completed his performance by sliding down a rope and taking a bow in front of an imaginary audience.

  Lucy shot a questioning look at Monty. ‘I think you owe me an apology.’

  He raised his eyebrows. ‘What for?’

  ‘You should have warned me that Imperator would go straight into his routine. I might have been thrown.’

  ‘If you’d been unseated you wouldn’t have been the woman I’m looking for. You stayed on and that’s all that matters. I can see you have possibilities.’

  ‘Your father seems to think that Stella wanted the job. No wonder she resents me.’

  ‘Resents you?’ His look of surprise seemed genuine, and he shook his head. ‘Stella can ride and she’s fearless, but she’s impatient and the horses don’t give their best. On the other hand she can do anything with reptiles. Stella is our snake woman.’

  ‘Snakes?’ Lucy stared at him in horror. ‘She performs with snakes?’

  He chuckled. ‘Don’t let her know you’re scared of reptiles. Stella has a mischievous sense of humour. I’ll say no more, but beware.’

  ‘I think you ought to tell me exactly what’s expected of me in the show.’ Lucy glanced down at her costume. ‘This isn’t the most comfortable outfit when it comes to sitting on a horse.’

  ‘I suppose you’d like to wear riding breeches, like a man.’

  ‘Why not? I rode astride once when I was a child, much to Miss Wantage’s horror.’

  ‘Miss Wantage?’

  ‘She was my governess.’ The words came out before she had time to think and she could tell by Monty’s startled expression that she had made a mistake. ‘I mean, she was governess to the young mistress. I was her maid.’

  ‘Do maidservants usually learn to ride?’

  ‘I lived on a farm before I went into service,’ Lucy said, improvising wildly. ‘I used to ride bareback.’ Once again she had allowed her tongue to run away with her. She could tell by his thoughtful expression that this had given him an idea for the show, but it was too late, the damage was done. She faced him with a defiant look. ‘Perhaps we’d better go through the routine.’

  At the end of the session Lucy was stiff and sore, but she was not going to admit this to anyone, least of all Monty. He seemed satisfied with her performance, but she had the feeling that he was being over-generous with his praise. Anyone who could sit a horse could have done what he asked, and she left the ring wondering why he had agreed to include her in his act. She stepped outside into the sunshine and was confronted by Stella with a large python draped around her shoulders. Lucy’s initial reaction was to back away, but she knew instinctively that this was exactly what Stella wanted. She managed to stand her ground, forcing herself to remain calm. ‘Good morning, Stella.’

  ‘I can see that you’ve been put through your paces,’ Stella said coldly. ‘Monty is a hard taskmaster. You’ll have to be good or you’ll be out on your ear, my girl.’

  ‘He seemed satisfied.’ Lucy kept a wary eye on the snake. It moved its head in her direction and it was all she could do not to panic. She forced her lips into a smile. ‘I can’t wait to see your act.’

  Stella’s eyes widened. ‘You like snakes?’

  ‘Who could dislike such a fine animal?’

  ‘Would you like to hold him?’ Stella took a step towards her, pinning Lucy against the guy ropes supporting the big top. ‘I’m sure he likes you.’

  ‘I – I like him too, but I’m not used to handling reptiles. I might hurt him.’

  Stella made as if to lift the large creature from her shoulders. ‘He’s used to being handled and he loves women.’

  Lucy’s heart was hammering against her tightly corseted ribcage and she was finding it hard to breathe. If Stella moved a step closer she was certain she would faint from sheer terror.

  ‘Stop teasing Lucy.’ A small voice piped up close to Lucy’s elbow.

  Stella jumped visibly, peering through a loop of the snake’s sinuous body. ‘Jenny Starr. How many times have I told you not to creep up on people?’

  ‘You wouldn’t have took no notice if a brass band had come up behind you.’ Jenny held her hand up t
o Lucy. ‘Ignore the serpent.’ She led her away, waiting until they were out of earshot. ‘The snake’s harmless enough,’ she said with a wry smile. ‘It’s the other one you need to watch.’

  Lucy took several deep breaths, and when her pulses stopped racing she leaned over to drop a kiss on the top of Jenny’s dark curls. ‘Thank you so much. I was really scared.’

  ‘As I said, the snake’s not the dangerous one. If Stella takes a dislike to someone they’d better watch out, and if that particular person happens to catch Monty’s eye they’d better be very careful.’

  ‘Thank you for the warning.’ Lucy fell into step beside her, walking slowly so that she did not outpace the small woman.

  ‘I got some liniment that might help,’ Jenny said, grinning. ‘You’ll be sore for days but it’ll wear off eventually.’

  ‘Thank you again.’ Lucy managed a tight little smile. ‘I haven’t ridden for some time.’

  ‘I daresay you’re more used to travelling in a carriage. You ain’t like the rest of us, Lucy. It’s as plain as the nose on your face.’

  ‘What makes you say that?’ Lucy asked, startled.

  ‘Why, my dear, it’s quite obvious that you was brought up to be a lady.’

  ‘No, you’re mistaken, Jenny. I’m no better than anyone here.’

  ‘That’s as maybe, but Monty spotted it and so did the boss. You’ll have a job to make the circus folk think otherwise.’ Jenny stopped as they reached her caravan. ‘Wait here and I’ll fetch the embrocation.’ She skipped nimbly up the steps, returning moments later. ‘Rub this on the affected parts and you’ll feel the benefit almost immediately. My old granny used to swear by it.’

  ‘I’m in your debt, Jenny. If there’s anything I can do in return, just say.’

  ‘Lor’ love you, duck. We’re like a family and we look after our own.’

  ‘Even Stella?’ Lucy murmured, suppressing a giggle.

  Jenny laughed and winked. ‘I’m saying nothing.’

  ‘But it will go against me if others think I don’t fit in,’ Lucy said anxiously. ‘I’m no different from any of you here, and that’s the truth.’

  ‘Maybe and maybe not, but take my advice and don’t get too friendly with Monty. Stella’s not the only jealous woman in the circus.’

  ‘What do you mean? Is every female besotted with him?’

  ‘Not me, that’s for certain. But you ought to watch out for Tallulah, the tattooed lady, and Ilsa has a soft spot for Monty, although she has to keep it from her old man, Johann. He’s billed as the strongest man in the world and he’d break a man’s neck if he caught him making eyes at his wife.’

  Lucy gulped and swallowed. ‘I thought the animals were the dangerous ones, but it seems I was mistaken.’

  Jenny laughed and patted her hand. ‘Animals can be tamed.’ She clutched her hands to her breast. ‘It’s the beast within that causes the trouble.’ She turned her head at the sound of childish voices and her face lit up. ‘That’s my boys. I’d best go and relieve my mum; she’s getting on a bit and they’re a real handful.’ She hurried off, leaving Lucy to make her way back to Froniga’s tent. She was stiff and sore and Stella’s open enmity had shaken her more than she cared to admit, but she must not lose sight of her reason for being here in the first place. As she limped through the maze of caravans and tents, she caught sight of Tallulah and tried hard not to stare at the tattoos which covered every visible part of her body, including her face. Lucy murmured a greeting and hurried on, smiling and nodding to the curious circus folk, some of whom responded in a friendly fashion while others turned away or pretended not to see her.

  She slowed down when she came to where a male and a female lion were confined behind steel bars, and she was consumed with pity for the caged beasts. Their lacklustre coats were matched by their dull eyes and dejected poses, and she wished that she could set them free in their native land. But these poor beasts would die in captivity, as would the tiger in the neighbouring van, and the two elephants which were shackled and tethered to steel posts driven into the ground. The animals were obviously well fed and their physical needs cared for, but Lucy remembered only too well what it had felt like when she was first taken to her grandfather’s house in Albemarle Street. She too had been like a wild thing snatched from the life she had known and robbed of her freedom. She walked on at a slower pace.

  She found Froniga seated on the ground in front of a camp fire, stirring the contents of a soot-blackened pot. ‘That smells good,’ Lucy said appreciatively.

  Froniga looked up and smiled. ‘You’ve been gone a long time. I was beginning to think you’d cut and run.’

  ‘Monty made me ride Imperator,’ Lucy said, rubbing her sore backside with a rueful grin. ‘I managed to stay on, but he didn’t ask me to do anything that was too difficult. I think he was being kind as it was my first day.’

  Froniga gave her a searching look. ‘That doesn’t sound like Monty. He must have a plan in mind for you.’

  ‘I don’t know how I’d manage if I had to leave before I’ve seen my grandmother. It’s not easy to find work when you’re not trained for anything useful. I can’t even cook, although I can scrub floors with the best of them.’

  ‘You’ll be all right, my duck. You’ve done well if you’ve got Monty and the boss on your side. Their word is law round here.’

  Lucy’s stomach rumbled and she realised that she was very hungry. She leaned over the pot, inhaling the savoury aroma of the stew. ‘That smells tasty,’ she said appreciatively.

  ‘I can cook when I put my mind to it.’ Froniga dipped the ladle in the pot and sipped. ‘That’s good, even if I say so myself.’ She glanced at the brown glass bottle clutched in Lucy’s hand. ‘What have you got there?’

  ‘Jenny gave me this liniment. She must have noticed that I was a bit stiff after all that exercise.’

  Froniga put her head on one side. ‘There’s something other than a sore bum that’s worrying you. You can’t fool a Romany.’

  Lucy sank down on the grass beside her. ‘I’m not sure this will work, Froniga. I managed to stay in the saddle, but, as I said, Monty was going easy on me.’

  ‘I told you he likes you. Make the most of it.’

  ‘It’s not him I’m worried about. It’s Stella.’

  Froniga eyed her with a twinkle in her dark eyes and a smile on her lips. ‘Did I forget to mention the snake?’

  ‘You knew?’

  ‘Of course I did, but pythons aren’t poisonous, and this one isn’t big enough to crush the life out of you. It might be different when it’s fully grown.’

  ‘It’s huge.’

  ‘And will be even bigger in time, but we won’t be here that long.’ Froniga reached for her tobacco pouch and clay pipe. ‘The carter was here again this morning and I paid him to take a message to the prison, requesting permission to visit Eva Pocket on Sunday, after the grand parade.’

  Lucy threw her arms around her. ‘You’re wonderful. I don’t know what I’d do without you.’

  ‘Mind my pipe. It’s the last one I’ve got.’ Froniga’s sharp tone was belied by the warmth of her smile.

  Rehearsals for the opening show went on all day and well into the evenings for the next three weeks. Lucy had to learn the routine she was to do solo as well as her part when she worked with Monty. He was an excellent horseman, fearless and in total command of his mount, treating the high-spirited animal with patience and surprising gentleness. Lucy was constantly surprised by the changes in Monty’s moods. Sometimes he was autocratic and domineering, verging on the unreasonable, and at other times he was encouraging, giving praise where and when it was due. He made her laugh and at times he made her want to cry. She was too proud to shed a tear in front of him, even when she was humiliated by her failure to achieve the exacting standards he set for both her and himself, but eventually she became more confident and the difficult routines became easier. The aching limbs and sore buttocks that plagued her in the beginning lessene
d, and she was able to conquer her nerves when performing in the ring, although she preferred not to think about how she would feel when she had a real audience watching her.

  The day of the grand parade dawned fine and warm, and the air of anticipation seemed to have affected everyone, including the animals. It was early morning when the cavalcade set off for town. Lucy rode Imperator and Froniga travelled in the van with Johann and Ilsa. Monty had chosen Lucy to ride beside him as he led the parade and she knew that Stella would make her suffer for enjoying such a privilege, but she did not care. It was not the appreciation of the crowds lining the streets cheering and waving that made her stomach churn with excitement, it was the thought of being reunited with her grandmother.

  When the parade came to an end they stopped on common land on the outskirts of the town in order to rest the animals before making the return journey to the camp. Lucy and Froniga took the opportunity to slip away, and set off for the prison, hitching a lift with the carter, who had brought his family to enjoy the spectacle. It was a noisy ride as the children were overexcited and one of the younger ones was sick over the side of the cart. His mother patted him on his back, mopped him up and told him off for eating the sweets that the performers had tossed into the crowd as an added incentive to buy tickets for the show.

  The carter drew up outside the prison, and his wife informed the eldest boy that this was where he would end up if he didn’t behave himself. Lucy and Froniga climbed down to the pavement, thanked the carter and waved to the children as the vehicle lumbered off.

  Lucy looked up at the fortress-like exterior of the county jail and her heart sank. ‘What will I do if she doesn’t want to see me?’

  Chapter Sixteen

  A GRIM-FACED WARDER led them through a maze of corridors, using a huge bunch of keys to unlock doors and locking them immediately after they had passed through. In the dim light with the cold striking up through the flagstone floor, Lucy felt as though they were being taken deep into the underworld where all hope was lost and souls writhed in torment. Muffled sobs and moans were accompanied by pleas for help, and the smell of unwashed bodies mingled with the foul odour from the slop buckets. She covered her mouth and nose with her hand, stifling a rising feeling of panic as a sudden urge to leave this dreadful place made her want to run away.