Anticipation: A Heart & Handcuffs Anthology

by Megan Mitcham

  “Does she not get you’re undercover? Your job requires you to be gone for days, weeks, shit—sometimes months at a time.”

  David cringed. He’d been gone all right. Months didn’t even touch it. His need to scream at Lori, blame her for the distance between them, started to slip.

  “Yeah, that’s what I said.” But her accusations were true. He hadn’t been to any of the kids’ school or sports events in a year. He didn’t realize so much time had passed.

  “Shit. Did you spank her?”

  Spank? He’d barely been able to get words past his lips. The last time they had actually played together was…

  Too long.

  “No. We just argued. And I left.” Like always. Shit.

  “How about we celebrate, just us. Me, you, Lori, and Tanya?” Garrett’s long-time girlfriend and submissive, Tanya, was Lori’s best friend. She’d helped Lori learn the lifestyle.

  “How is Tanya?” David couldn’t remember the last time he’d talked to her.

  “She’s great. Just got that job at the District Attorney’s office. Bet she moves up to DA herself pretty fast.”

  “Wow. I mean, tell her I said congrats. I thought she just graduated,” David said.

  Garrett snorted, hooked his thumbs into his slacks, and leaned back. The small chair groaned under his massive frame but held tight. “Man, you have been gone. Tanya graduated six months ago. Lori took her out to celebrate.”

  “Oh, yeah. Forgot.” The case file glared at him. Forgot his wife. Forgot his friends. Forgot…everything.

  “Okay. Sounds like you need some alone time with your wife. How about I finish up the file, you call it a day?” Garrett, who never offered anything, extended his hand.

  Could he hand over his biggest case for someone else to finish? He’d built excuses to stay at work late for so long, made up reasons why he needed to be gone on so many business trips. If he'd been brutally honest with himself, he would've seen that he was running away from his wife's cold shoulder.

  But after her heated words this morning he realized she was anything but cold. She was hurting. And it was his fault.

  “No. I got it. Thanks though. But I do have to decline your offer for drinks. For now.”

  Garrett stood and pulled open the door. “Okay. Remember. You got the bad guy. He’s behind bars. You can relax.”

  Yeah, right after he spent some quality time with Lori. And reminded her how things worked in their relationship. He waved Garrett out.

  David had given excuse after excuse about how the house was more important. How the kids were more important. How everything was more important.

  But nothing meant anything without Lori by his side.

  David snatched the phone off his desk before dialing his secretary’s extension. "Rebecca, get my mother-in-law on the phone."

  He twirled his pen, his mind spinning as he developed a plan. It was summer. The kids were out of school and hadn’t been to visit their grandparents in months. Just two weeks ago his mother-in-law had scolded him for not bringing her precious babies to visit. He knew how much she missed Tim and Miley. When he was gone for work he missed them just as much.

  "David? Is something wrong?" Melinda's voice came on the line, her concern evident. David didn’t call. He was usually at work. He cringed, realizing his wife and kids weren’t the only ones he’d neglected.

  "No, nothing’s wrong. I’m calling to ask a favor. How would you like it if Tim and Miley came to visit for a couple of weeks?"

  David yanked the phone from his ear just in time to save himself a burst eardrum. "You mean it? I haven't gotten to see those little rugrats in months! Of course we would love to have them over. When?"

  "How about Saturday? I can drive out to meet you halfway. That'll give me time to pack up and everything. Oh and will you do me a favor and not tell Lori? I'm planning a big surprise for her."

  "I always told her how lucky she was to find you. I can sense that romantic heart. My lips are sealed."

  David made up his mind, formed a plan, and put it in motion. Now he had to find the patience to wait the rest of the week to execute that plan.

  Anticipation ate at him. He’d struggled to maintain status quo with Lori when all he wanted to do was throw her over his shoulder and march upstairs to their bedroom.

  Lori left for her hair appointment at nine a.m. sharp. As soon as her car disappeared from their street, he scooped the kids up and booked it to meet his mother-in-law.

  At noon he pulled back into their drive. Lori’s highlights took three hours. He gripped the steering wheel, grinding his palms against the leather. Not enough time.

  He grabbed his cell and dialed his wife. “Lori, where are you?”

  “You know where I am. At the salon.” Her voice clearly indicated he’d intruded on her alone time.

  “Great. I need you to run by the grocery store on the way home. We’re out of a few things.” David gripped the wheel harder with his right hand, struggling to keep his voice even.

  Lori’s sigh nearly knocked his excitement down a notch. He knew she dropped her head into her hand and rubbed fingers across her forehead. He could picture the look of disappointment. “Sure. Anything else?”

  He needed Lori. But not yet. He needed more time. “No. I’ll text you the list. Love you.”

  She hesitated, and his heart clenched. If he were Superman, the wheel would have been crushed into dust in his grip. David realized this was the same tone he’d heard for the past year. The tone that clearly said, ‘I’m so disappointed, why don’t you understand?’

  “Lori?”

  “I love you too.” The resignation in her voice yanked his stomach into one solid knot. He had to lean forward under the weight of realization. He was the reason for his wife’s sadness. Him. David. The fool.

  It was time for the dominant in him to reestablish control, and for his wife to remember her submissive role. David climbed from the car with purpose, headed into the house and straight into their closet.

  After a good ten minutes of searching through clothes and drawers and shelves he went to the bedroom. Beneath the bed was empty. Anywhere else his toy bag could be, was empty. Then he remembered Lori’s furious spring cleaning. He charged up to the attic, expecting to find his bag discarded beneath a pile of old clothes.

  Instead, he found the bag on a top shelf in the back corner, protected from junk. Not one speck of dust soiled the leather. Lori had obviously taken great care with their playthings. It hadn’t been him. Shame heated his cheeks.

  On the heels of his shame came hope. Lori hadn’t neglected his bag; she’d taken care of it. Which meant she still wanted him. Still wanted their lifestyle. His fingers curled around the leather handles, easily lifting its heavy weight. David exited the attic, refreshed and recharged, inhaling the scent of leather cleaner.

  Chapter 3

  The silence hit her first. Lori turned and shut the front door. The latch fell into place with a soft click. She sat her purse and keys on the entry table to her right and took tentative steps into the living room.

  She was so busy noticing the absence of children’s screams and laughter and her husband’s voice that she nearly tripped over something on the floor.

  Her gaze dropped, ready to pick up a discarded toy, and fell on the dark brown leather duffle bag. Her heart boomeranged into her throat and back down into her chest where it exploded into furious pounding. Heat flooded her cheeks. Her hands shook.

  She didn't dare reach down and touch it.

  Tears swam in her eyes. She’d thought he’d forgotten about their toy bag. She sat the grocery bags on the floor, forgetting their contents along with her anger at David for asking her to run errands on her day off.

  As she pushed them to the side the plastic sacks wrinkled and crunched. She knelt on the hardwood floor, staring at the bag in front of her, wondering what its presence meant.

  Euphoria swept through her. David was sending her a message. He still loved her. W
anted her. Or — not. Despair crashed in its wake and her thoughts flip-flopped back and forth.

  She reached a tentative hand forward and ran a finger across the top. The scent of leather polish plumed in the air fresh from her attention last week. She knew it was pathetic, but every month she snuck into the attic to clean their old bag. To long for their old life.

  She trailed her fingers to the side, skimmed the seam, and grasped the zipper. She paused before pulling it open. Was this some trick? Perhaps a new form of punishment? Would she find it empty? Or worse, filled with his clothes?

  “I’m not leaving you.” David’s voice was deep, dark, and full of promise.

  She closed her eyes and dropped the zipper. Relief drained her strength. Tears fell from the corners of her eyes. Seeing that bag tore open wounds she’d silently nursed for the last two years. It left her raw and hurting.

  She felt a small shift in the air, heard fabric rustle. She opened her eyes. David squatted in front of her on the balls of his bare feet. Worn jeans graced his muscular legs. A white button up shirt hung open, framing his hard pecs and chiseled abs.

  Her mouth watered. She’d forgotten how drop-dead sexy her husband was and how mind-numbingly intense his gaze. Right now she had no idea what thoughts lurked in his nimble mind—and that scared the shit out of her.

  “How was your day?”

  The question caught her off guard, and she nodded without thought.

  Lori had seesawed back-and-forth, wondering if her confession had been the biggest mistake of her life or the best decision she’d ever made. She had prayed every day that David would see through her harsh words for what they really represented—er plea to him to come back. To be her husband again. To be her Dominant.

  She wasn’t a weak woman, but the fatigue of taking over all the decisions in their lives weighed her down. She didn’t need anyone else to think for her, but she found freedom when David made the decisions. Especially in the bedroom.

  “Don't cry. I know I screwed up. But I'm going to make everything all right.” His voice was the calm, controlled one she remembered. The one from before their relationship had been interrupted by life.

  She shivered. Anticipation tingled down her spine. David took a breath. She held hers. His next words could rip her in half or mend their broken relationship.

  “I want you to go upstairs. Take a bath and come back downstairs. No clothes. No shoes. Leave your hair down. I like your hair.”

  She knelt there, on the floor, dumbfounded. The fear of David leaving had been a breathing monster eating her insides. How could a man with so much pride not walk out after the things she’d said? Her chest swelled to capacity, ready to explode with emotion. She couldn’t process. Couldn’t speak.

  “Do I need to repeat myself? Maybe you need a reminder of what happens when you fail to follow my commands.” His words were like a bucket of ice water thrown over her head. She stumbled to her feet and all but ran up the stairs. She didn’t stop until she stood on the white-tile bathroom floor before their Jacuzzi tub in the center of the master bath. The aroma of her favorite oil drifted up from the steamy water.

  She stripped out of her clothes as though flames licked their seams. She twisted her hair into a knot on top of her head and stepped in. Today at her hair appointment, she’d seriously considered cutting her long brown hair. It had been a thought of defiance against David. He’d always loved her hair. But there had been a part of her that thought by shearing its length she’d sever any hope of mending their relationship.

  Lori scrubbed quickly, nearly hard enough to remove skin. She looked for her razor and found a brand new one sitting on the edge of the tub next to her shaving cream. David had thought of everything.

  Once she was completely bare, she rinsed and dried, and then put on his favorite body spray. She ran out of the bathroom, pulling to a stop in front of their full-length bedroom mirror. The woman in the reflection was a little bit older, but still in good shape. And for the first time in a long time, she had a smile on her face that reached her eyes.

  David sat on the living room couch. His arm stretched across the back. His gaze locked on to her as soon as she reached the doorway. They clouded from quick silver to thunderstorm dark. Her heart caught in her throat. He still had the ability to freeze her in place with a single look. That look. The one that said he was in control.

  And she was going to like it.

  Her feet turned to mush and she shuffled across the room, her gaze on the floor. She stopped between his spread knees and chanced another peek.

  His sculpted jaw was relaxed, his lips straight. He stared at her as if she were the lamb before the wolf.

  She trembled, chills covering her naked skin. Her heartbeat kicked into high gear and she tangled her fingers together in a knot of anxiety and anticipation.

  The seconds of silence stretched out. Why didn’t he say anything?

  She couldn’t stand it anymore. “David?”

  “How could I have forgotten how absolutely beautiful you are?” He drew the words out, the slight lilt of his Southern drawl a caress.

  Tears threatened again. His voice had been reverent. Honest. And God she had missed it so much.

  Stop crying. Stop crying. Stop crying. She wasn’t one of those women who was pretty and vulnerable when they shed tears. Her nose turned red. Her eyes even redder.

  And he thought she was beautiful.

  “Kneel.” His voice didn’t waver this time. She lowered herself to the hardwood, unable to tear her gaze from his.

  “Perfect.”

  She flushed, embarrassed at his praise like this was their first time. Like he hadn’t seen her naked a thousand times.

  “I’m going to remind you of the rules — just in case you’ve forgotten them. Your safe word is red. You will address me as David or sir. You will keep your gaze on the floor at all times unless directed otherwise.” He leaned forward and tipped her chin up. “And the last, easiest rule to remember, is simply to obey me.” He paused, letting the words hang in the air. “Any questions?”

  She had to force her brain to process and her lips to move. “No, David.”

  “Good. And what happens if you fail to comply?” His tone was so matter of fact, so relaxed, but his eyes were stormy. Intense.

  “I will be punished.”

  “You will be punished, what?” he asked.

  “I will be punished, sir.”

  “Very good. That will be your only reminder.” David kept her chin tilted up, forcing her to acknowledge his words, his absolute command.

  Then his gaze softened ever so slightly. He caressed her cheek with his free hand. “Is this what you want, Lori?”

  The question caught her off guard. She’d already dropped into that space in her mind, giving up her will to his. She’d been edging into heaven.

  She didn’t have to think about her words this time. She knelt between his feet, peace settling in her soul for the first time in years. This is where she belonged. “Yes, sir. This is what I want. You are what I want. What I’ve always wanted.”

  He kissed her then, his lips the briefest whisper across hers. “I love you, Lori.”

  “I love you too, David.”

  He smiled, his lips stretching a little sideways. A smile that promised pleasure. Predatory. Hot. Dominant.

  She melted.

  “We’ll start slow. I want you to relax. Your mom has the kids for the next two weeks. I’ve taken off work. And I plan on using every single one of those days to remind you of how much I love you. And to make it up to you.”

  “Two weeks?” she repeated, not believing his words.

  “Yes. Turns out in all that time not missing a day at work, I built up a lot of leave time.” His hand curved around her cheek. The soft caress melted her already liquid bones. “I’m going to do whatever it takes to repair my mistakes. Are you ready?” David said.

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Good. Eyes on the floor.” All that smooth So
uthern molasses disappeared from his voice, replaced by the harsh command of a man in charge.

  Lori dropped her gaze immediately. Her cheeks flushed and her breath quickened. He kept his hand on her cheek and she tilted into his palm, seeking the comfort of his touch.

  “And I need time to show you how much I still love you.”

  She had to use all her willpower to keep her gaze cast downward. She wanted to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him with every ounce of love she possessed. His words warmed her from the inside out, killing the coldness in her soul.

  David stood, towering over her, but she didn’t move. He walked a slow path around her, correcting her posture with little touches to the shoulder, to her spine, his touch setting her on fire.

  When his touch disappeared, the silence permeated her skin, her body. He didn’t have to touch her to control her. Her every thought was tuned to his presence.

  She could feel him in the room. Feel his authority. Something cold slipped around her neck and she jerked. David lifted her hair over her shoulder, she heard a small click, and then her hair drifted back down her back.

  She touched the choker resting at the base of her throat. Her collar. The small gold chain he’d put on her after their wedding ceremony. One she could wear daily. A reminder to keep him always in her mind.

  No matter where she was, no matter what she was doing, David would be with her.

  An intense wave of longing slammed into her so hard she shook and chill bumps covered her entire body. “You found it?” Tears clogged her throat again. Damn. She never cried, but she couldn’t help it. He’d ripped open a deep wound and wounds hurt when they healed.

  “Stand up.” David’s command was easy and her body obeyed without thought. He came around, stood toe to toe. She had to concentrate not to look at him when all she wanted to do was get lost in his gaze.

  He tipped her chin up, holding her prisoner. “Yes, I found your collar. In its case. In the bottom of my bag. And yes, I noticed you haven’t worn it in a long time.”

  He leaned down, his face inches from hers. “So I took it to the jeweler this week and had him install a special clasp. One only I can open.” His voice got darker with each word and it was then she noticed the pain in his gaze.