Question Quest

by Piers Anthony

She took a walk around, exploring the region. After a few minutes she returned, and used her key to open the door again. She entered, and as usual it froze in the open position. She walked to the statue.

  Sure enough, he had not passed her scuff mark, though he had had time to do so. In fact, he was even a bit behind it. He had retreated during her absence, or perhaps been reset to his original position. He raced for the door only when it was open, and he had to start a certain distance from it.

  But what was the point? Coincidence was not the only thing Lacuna distrusted. Pointlessness was suspicious too, especially in a magical place.

  She peered more closely at the statue. Now she saw what she had overlooked before: it was on a low pedestal. Evidently the man started there, and ran off it to the door. On the pedestal was the legend: STATUE OF LIMITATIONS.

  That was the other thing Humfrey had mentioned! She had to go to the Mountain of Change before the Statue of Limitations ran out. Before he ran out the door, obviously. If he got there first, the door might close behind him—and then perhaps her key would no longer work, and she would be confined in the park. Perhaps she would have to strip naked and get on the pedestal, ready to run out when the next person entered. And she might have to move as slowly as the man did, being rendered statuesque.

  What an awful fate! But now she knew: she would have to complete her business at the Mountain of Change quickly, because the man was not all that far from the door. If she took too long, she would surely be lost.

  So where was the Mountain of Change? It had to be here somewhere.

  She spied a path behind the statue, and quickly followed it. The park was not all that large, so this had a fair chance of leading where she wanted.

  She was right. Soon the mountain hove into view. It was not large as ordinary mountains went, but it glistened oddly. As she came closer, she saw that its slopes were rough with shiny little stones. Then she came closer yet, and discovered that those weren't stones, they were disks. In fact, they were Mundane coins, gold and silver and copper and brass. What was called small change.

  The Mountain of Change! She had assumed that it would be a mountain where things changed, and perhaps her life would change too, so that she could somehow be fulfilled instead of deadly dull blah. She should have known better.

  Still, this was supposed to represent the solution to her problem, so maybe it was both kinds of change. What was she supposed to do here?

  Well, what did anyone do with a mountain? Anyone climbed it, simply because it was there. Everyone knew that. So she would climb it.

  She started climbing it, but the moment her feet got on the coins, they lost purchase. Her legs did not exactly sink into the surface; it was just that she could not climb. Instead, the coins gave way below, so that she remained pretty much where she was.

  But she had to climb, or the Statue of Limitations would run out before she got where she was going. She surely couldn't afford that.

  She stepped back and pondered the situation. What would freeze these loose coins in place, so she could climb them?

  She remembered something Humfrey's Mundane wife, Sofia, had said in passing. Frozen assets. It seemed irrelevant, yet she almost had a notion.

  Her notion clarified. It turned out to be a naughty one. But she was pressed for time; that statue might reach the door at any moment. She had to try whatever might work, and quickly.

  She stepped back onto the change, held her skirt tight about her legs, and sat down. The surface of the mountain was surprisingly cold; she was chilled right through the hips. Then she touched the coins around her. Sure enough: they did not budge. They were frozen in place. They could not handle this particular type of contact.

  She knew she could not afford to stand up again. It was not her feet which froze the change. So she pushed with hands and feet and scooted as well as she could up the slope. It was uncomfortable and tiring, but she made decent (or perhaps indecent) progress, and the mountain was small. She was glad it hadn't been composed of large change!

  Finally, somewhat soiled of skirt—she hadn't realized that Mundane change was such dirty money—and numb of rear, she reached the top of the Mountain of Change. She got to her feet and stood in the loosening coins. What now? Humfrey had not told her what to do once she got here.

  Well, maybe she simply had to make her wish. That might be so obvious to Magician Humfrey that he thought it was unnecessary to mention. So she would try it.

  "I wish I had married Vernon twelve years ago," she said.

  She waited. Nothing happened. Her excursion had, it seemed, been for nothing. She must have gotten here after the Statue of Limitations ran out. Her effort had not been enough, because she was no heroine, just a drab woman.

  Lacuna sighed. It had at least been worth a try. She had, for a little while, had a glimmer of hope.

  She slogged down the mountain, her feet half sliding on the massed coins. She walked forlornly back the way she had come. There was nothing to do but fly back to the Good Magician's castle and return the magic carpet and the Key to Success.

  But when she reached the door, she discovered it closed—and the statue still inside. What had happened? That door had been wedged open; had someone else come and managed to close it?

  She saw that the statue had almost reached the exit; he must have had the door slam in his face. She knew how that felt. But there was no other person.

  Lacuna shrugged and used the wooden key to unlock the door from inside. It opened, and she stepped through. The door closed immediately behind her.

  "Hi, Mom!"

  She jumped, surprised. There was a blue-haired boy with a water ball in his hand. It was Ryver, the guardian of the moat, who had almost prevented her from entering Humfrey's castle at the outset of this story. What was he doing here?

  "Did you get your wish, Mom?" Ryver asked politely.

  "I'm afraid it just wasn't—" She broke off. "What did you call me?"

  "What's the matter, Mom? You look spooked! Did something bad happen in there?"

  She stared at him. He had wanted to be adopted into a human family. But she wasn't a family, she was just a middle-aged maid. "Something odd may have occurred, yes," she agreed cautiously. She preferred not to speak further on the subject until she had a better notion what had happened outside the park.

  "Well, we'd better get back before Dad misses us," Ryver said. "I got the carpet; let's go." He indicated the magic carpet, which was now spread out on the ground.

  They got on. Ryver sat in front, to direct it. He handed her his water ball, which she accepted as if used to this. It did not break in her hand, to her faint surprise.

  She sat behind the boy on the carpet. It took off. Soon they were sailing over the landscape.

  "Your father—he's worried?" she inquired, hoping to elicit further information.

  "No, it's not that," he said cheerfully. "He just isn't much of a hand at taking care of the kids. Also, he's curious what you were wishing for. He says it isn't as if you had a bad life or anything."

  Lacuna stared into the ball of water as if it were a magic crystal, wondering just how good or bad her life was supposed to be.

  In due course the carpet descended. It came to rest just outside the moat of the Good Magician's castle.

  Two blurs of motion came charging across the lowered drawbridge. In two moments they flung themselves into Lacuna's embrace, causing her to drop the water ball, which splattered on the ground. They were Jot and Tittle, whom she had encountered in Hell's annex.

  "Great to see you again, Mom!" Jot exclaimed, planting a somewhat slobbery kiss on her left cheek.

  "Yes, great to have you back, Mom!" Tittle agreed, planting a slightly more dainty kiss on her right cheek.

  These were now her children?

  Then a man crossed the drawbridge at a more sedate pace. He was oddly familiar. In fact he was the statue— that perfect specimen for running. No—now she saw that he was older, but still in excellent physique. It
was Vernon, who had grown considerably more handsome in the past decade or so, as if a good woman had seen to his health and happiness. "Did you have a good trip, dear?"

  Lacuna tried not to stare at him. Could it be that he really was her husband, now? "I may have," she answered.

  He reached down to help her get off the carpet and out of the entanglement of children. He brought her to her feet and drew her in for a kiss. Then she began to believe. The Mountain of Change had changed her life! Yet why was she the only one who realized it?

  Vernon rolled up the carpet and carried it back across the drawbridge. Lacuna and the children followed. She noticed that there was now a regular moat monster in the water, who let them pass without challenge.

  She paused, looking more carefully at the creature. It seemed somehow familiar, though she was sure she had never seen it before. Had she heard of it? Then she made the connection: she had heard of it! "Aren't you Soufflé Serpent?" she asked it. "Who guarded the moat for Princess Rose of Roogna?”

  The monster nodded his head in agreement. Evidently more had changed around here than her life! When Ryver stopped being the moat guardian, Soufflé must have resumed the post. If her change of life had made Ryver's life change, then this had been necessary. How many other ripples had this thing set in motion?

  MareAnn met them at the castle entrance. She stepped forward to embrace Lacuna. "I see that you did get your wish," she murmured. She, at least, recognized the change which had occurred, perhaps because she had been in Hell with Lacuna, and therefore apart from normal Xanth.

  "What wish?" Vernon asked.

  MareAnn answered for her. "Hers was the same as mine: merely to return to her loving family."

  "But you were away from yours," Vernon said.

  MareAnn merely smiled. "We women have our little ways. They come with our loss of innocence."

  Vernon shook his head, perplexed. Lacuna decided that it would be best to let him remain that way.

  They returned the carpet and key to Magician Humfrey. He was already deep in his beloved Book of Answers. "That confounded foreign elf," he was muttering. "Now she wants to find her way back to the World of Two Moons, and she's going to arrive here right at the worst time."

  "Worst time?" Lacuna asked, curious though she was sure it was none of her business—or perhaps because it was none of her business.

  "Portrait Day," he grumbled. "All my wives will be given passes from Hell to attend, because such a melee will amuse the Demon X(A/N)th, and I'll have to have my portrait done too, and if there's one thing I hate worse than a gaggle of women, it's posing for a portrait.”

  "Maybe Jenny Elf's appearance will give you a pretext to get away from it all for a moment by addressing her Question," Lacuna suggested.

  Humfrey brightened. "Maybe it will." Then he realized that someone was actually in the room with him. There was the key beside his tome. "Oh. You're back."

  "Yes, thank you. Your Answer worked. But—"

  "Of course it worked," he snapped. "How could it be otherwise?"

  "But there is one thing—" Lacuna began.

  "Is that another Question?" Humfrey inquired.

  For another service? She would have to let it go. "No. Thank you for the use of the carpet and key."

  He glowered at her. "I hate it when dull folk are too nice. Very well, I will make an incidental remark: certain people are not directly affected by certain events, when they are the focus of those actions. They are, as it were, the movers rather than the moved. But in time you will pick up your intervening history by listening to the comments of others, and you will gradually come to accept this as your own memory. Your present life is as it seems."

  "Thank you, Magician," she said gratefully. Now she knew why she, almost alone, remembered her other life. She was the one who had changed it. Some few others who had interacted with her before that change, and who had had their own lives changed by her actions, also remembered. But the rest of Xanth would not realize what had happened; to them, the present situation was the one which had always been true.

  Humfrey nodded. Then he did an extremely rare thing: he smiled. Lacuna returned the smile, while Vernon looked confused.

  "It's nothing to worry about, dear," Lacuna told him, taking his arm. "Let's go home and find something interesting to do." She nudged him in a way that suggested all manner of wild creatures, such as lovebirds and storks. She had dreamed for years of doing that, but had never before had the opportunity or courage. What a joy it was!

  His eye glinted. "You have always been the most interesting person in my life," he said. Lacuna intended to remain so.