Gabe

by M. Malone

  I run a hand through my hair and feign confusion. “Uh no, actually. I was looking for a linen closet and then realized that this isn’t actually an apartment. It’s easy to forget this is a hotel suite.”

  Her pinched look dissolves into a smile. “Yeah, it is. But you can just take one from any of the bathrooms. It’s fine.”

  I duck into the guest room I’m standing next to and walk past the perfectly made up bed to the bathroom. It’s fully stocked and ready for guests, so I grab two towels from the stack above the toilet.

  When I come back out, I hand one to Carol. “Sorry about that again. My brother can be a little clumsy.”

  “Oh it’s fine. He was so apologetic about it that I actually feel bad. He got more of it on himself than me. He said one of his tattoos wasn’t fully healed and it was burning him. I had to help him get it off. Poor guy.”

  My mouth twitches. Zack is not a fan of being touched by people he doesn’t know so if he had to let her play nursemaid, I’m sure I’m going to get an earful about it later.

  When we enter the living room, Max looks over from his seat by the window. “Is everything okay?”

  “Yeah, found ‘em.” I hold up the towels. His eyes follow me as I walk over to the table and make a big production about cleaning it up. I nod at Zack, letting him know that I got what I needed. He stands and walks over to Max, positioning his body between us. I pull the keycard from my pocket and tuck it under the towel.

  "You don't have to do that. I can clean it up." Carol appears at my side with the other towel.

  "I don't mind." I bend back to the liquid dripping onto the carpet before she can protest again.

  Carol wipes the tray she brought the drinks on. As I’m mopping up the puddle on the carpet, I casually toss the keycard over to the side of the table where she's standing. When she wipes the side of the table, she stops when she spots it.

  Her hand immediately flies to her waistband. “Oh I must have dropped it.” Her soft mumble is barely audible over Zack’s loud voice. I glance over my shoulder.

  “Are you telling him about that weird tattoo artist?”

  Zack looks over his shoulder at our prearranged signal. He moves out of the way so Max is visible. I stand with the soiled towel in my hands, the table behind me arranged the way it was when we arrived. Carol stands too, holding the tray with the empty glasses.

  “I’ll be back with more drinks.”

  Max watches as Carol leaves the room. Then his eyes swing back to me. For a long moment, we don’t break eye contact. Of all of his children, I am probably the most like Max. We’re both liars and manipulators, and extremely good at it. The only difference is that I made a conscious decision to stop. To try to be something better.

  But as he watches me, there’s something in his eyes I wasn’t expecting. Like he knows there was more to all that chaos than meets the eye but he isn’t going to call me on it. Like he’s aware that I’m playing him but doesn’t even care to stop it.

  Something that looks a lot like regret.

  “Your brother was just showing off his latest artwork. Sit down, Gabriel. And tell me what you’ve been up to.”

  chapter three

  SASHA

  "Is it ready yet?"

  I look over at my sister Audra in confusion. "What?"

  She points at the pan in front of me. "The cornbread. You took it out of the oven and you've just been standing here staring into space ever since."

  "Sorry. I was just thinking."

  I know I've been spaced out today but it's just because I've been so busy.

  After spending weeks holed up in my house and avoiding the world, I'd realized that there were so many other dreams to pursue. Before I'd gone on the show I'd made inquiries about a space for rent in downtown New Haven. It has always been a dream of mine to open a small jazz lounge and my entire family promised to invest.

  After my public humiliation, I was doubly glad that I had something else to focus on. Making plans and dreaming about how to make it happen has given me a new goal and my sanity back.

  I signed a lease on a commercial space in the center of town earlier this week so it's finally happening. And I can't wait to share the good news with my family.

  I look up when my sister Brenna enters the kitchen with a covered casserole dish. She's only a year older than I am and we've always been close. Even though Audra's only four years older than me, growing up it felt like light years. Her tendency to be a know-it-all doesn't help.

  Brenna puts her casserole dish down on the stove and then shucks off her coat. "I brought that smothered chicken casserole you like so much."

  The rest of the house is suspiciously quiet. Usually my brother-in-law Evan comes to the kitchen to say hi before plopping down in front of the television. Brenna also usually has my nephew, Carter, on her hip.

  "Where is everyone?"

  Brenna glances over at Audra before turning to the refrigerator. “Evan stayed at home with the baby. We thought it'd be nice to have it be just us tonight. Like old times."

  Something about that doesn't seem right. Audra's husband stayed home tonight with their two daughters, too. She'd claimed they were feeling under the weather. I know how overprotective Audra can be so I didn't think it was anything serious but maybe Brenna didn't want to expose Carter to any germs she thought the girls might be carrying.

  "Well, I'd hoped everyone would be here because I have good news."

  Opening a small jazz lounge for enthusiasts like my father is a dream come true. There were a few times I almost gave up this past week, especially when I got to the business office and found out that I'd done my paperwork incorrectly. I had to stand in line all over again this afternoon but I've finally got it all sorted. And the feeling when my landlord gave me the keys to my new space was magical. This has been the culmination of years of saving and planning. I'm doubly excited to tell my family about it since they've all promised to invest in the club with me. It'll be a true family endeavor.

  Mom enters the kitchen then and we all scurry to finish getting things ready. Once we're all seated at the table, we all clasp hands while she says grace. Brenna's casserole smells amazing. But when I pick up a serving spoon and stick it in the dish, I realize what's missing from the table.

  "Where's Daddy?"

  My mom doesn't meet my eyes as she answers. "He went out. Which is for the best because we need to talk to you."

  "About what?" I hold out my plate to accept a serving of vegetables. Then Brenna puts a heaping serving of the casserole next it.

  "The club. About our investment," Mom states.

  "What is there to talk about? The grand opening should be in a few months if all goes to plan. I've already signed a lease for the space."

  "Sasha, don't you think it's time to consider some alternatives? You were counting on getting publicity from being on television. But now … "

  She doesn't say anything else but I can imagine what she's leaving unsaid. Now that I'm not on the show, how will the club get exposure? Now that I'm a failure and a laughingstock, who will come?

  I pause with my fork halfway to my mouth. Across from me Audra chews her food slowly. When I look over at Brenna she won't look at me either.

  "So you're all pulling out? How am I supposed to have my grand opening? I won't be able to afford to build out the space let alone pay for furniture or fixtures. Thank God I got Kay and Eli to invest."

  Audra doesn't look impressed. "Eli owns that big security company. He can afford to lose money. I can't. Keith's hours just got cut and I've had to start working part-time to make up the difference. We can't afford to take chances."

  "On me. That's what you mean. You can't afford to take a chance on me. The girl who fails at everything."

  Brenna looks distraught. We've always been close and I know she doesn't want to hurt my feelings. But it hurts that she doesn't think I can pull this off. That she thinks I'm a failure just like everyone else. She puts her arms around me. />
  "That's not what we're saying. We just think you should reevaluate. You were counting on a lot of press and attention from being on the show. Now that you aren't, it's going to be really hard to get people in there." Brenna speaks softly, as if the cadence of her voice can soften the blow of what she’s saying.

  Shame boils through my blood as I'm confronted by the evidence that no one in my family believes in me. Even worse, the fact that my father isn't here just twists the knife. My father is the one who got me into jazz in the first place. I wanted to own a jazz lounge so badly because of all the stories he told about the club his best friend owned back in the seventies.

  "I shouldn't be surprised that you guys don't get it. You never really have."

  Mom suddenly looks hurt. "We have always tried to support you Sasha. But what kind of family would we be if we weren't honest with you? By the time you finish fooling around, you'll have spent the best years of your life chasing foolish dreams. I don't want you to look back with regret later when you have nothing to show for it."

  Her words cut me through and through. "How long have you guys been planning this little intervention?"

  Brenna looks guilty, probably that she didn't warn me about what I was walking into tonight. "We just want you to find happiness. You've spent so much time working on this. You never go out anymore. How are you supposed to meet anyone if you're working all the time? I worry about you living alone. I don't know what I'd do without Evan."

  I love my brother-in-law but his idea of a good time is watching sports on the couch, remote in one hand and a beer in the other. Not my thing at all.

  I push back from the table. "I need to go."

  There's a flurry of sound behind me as they all push their chairs back and follow me into the kitchen.

  "Thanks for letting me know that you're backing out of the deal." I grab my scarf and wrap it around my neck. I motion for Brenna to hand me my coat which is hanging on a hook next to the back door.

  She hands it over, watching me warily. "Why are you thanking us?"

  I pull the coat on, zip it and then flip up the hood in preparation for stepping out into the chilly night air. Then I look behind me. Brenna and Audra stand by my Mom. That's kind of the way it's always been though. I've never really belonged, not even in my own family.

  "I'm thanking you for letting me know early enough so that I can find other investors. Luckily I have friends who are willing to help me learn about the business side of things but I still have a lot of work to do. Including planning a grand opening on a shoestring budget.”

  Mom glances over at the others. "You mean you're still going through with it?"

  "Just because you guys don't think it's a good idea, doesn't mean that it won't be a success. And I'm glad to know what you really think of me. I was silly enough to actually think that you guys were proud of me for trying to follow my dreams but that's only when those dreams match up with what you want me to do. I won't make that mistake again."

  I step out onto the back steps, pulling the door shut behind me over their startled protests. My fists clench at my sides and I have to restrain myself from turning around and pounding on the door. But I don't have time for nonsense. It's time for me to go hunting.

  I need to find twenty thousand dollars.

  * * * * *

  The next day, I pivot in front of the full-length mirror in my bedroom, finally satisfied with my outfit. I have to get ready to leave since Emma asked me to help her set up for the surprise engagement party she's throwing for her future brother-in-law. Despite being rich, handsome and charming, Finn is also really nice. He even got me a recurring gig at a big hotel in Virginia Beach that pays my rent most months.

  When he found out that I was starting a business, he promised to introduce me to some other small business owners that can help me. More than likely, I’ll be doing some networking tonight at this party so I want to look festive but professional, too. Finn knows me as a singer. Tonight, I need to show everyone that I'm a businesswoman, too.

  If only I could show my own family as easily. I spent all night making plans on my ancient laptop. I can’t deny that it hurts, knowing that my own family is just waiting for me to fail, but it only makes me more determined. I can do this.

  I’m a businesswoman.

  I repeat that to myself as I put the finishing touches on my outfit and through the entire drive to Norfolk.

  Finn's penthouse is in a newly redeveloped section of the city. A rich part of the city. When I pull up, someone is pulling out of a space directly in front of the building. I quickly pull in and cut the engine. I look up at the impressive gray structure and have to swallow against a sudden attack of nerves. The first time I saw Finn arrive at Tank and Emma's place in a black Bentley that probably cost more than the duplex I live in, it was surreal.

  Now I'm going to his penthouse.

  I wonder if he has cool rich guy toys like a real life version of Batman or something. It's hard to believe that I know people with this kind of wealth. It's the kind of thing you see on television or in movies but is so far removed from your normal existence that it doesn't even register. However, it'll be different seeing it up close and personal. But this isn't just a social visit. This party has the potential to change my life.

  As I gather my things, I remind myself to keep my cool when I get up there. No gawking. I need to be cool and sophisticated.

  I walk into the lobby and falter when I see a guard behind a desk. Am I supposed to check in or what? Luckily before I can work myself into a state of anxiety, Emma walks in. She waves to the guy behind the desk and then holds out her arms for a hug. With her long blond hair and blue eyes, she looks so innocent. It's hard to believe that we bonded over our crappy jobs at a strip club, where I was singing and Emma used to wait tables.

  "I'm so glad you're here! My sister just texted me that she's running behind so I really need the help." Emma planned this surprise engagement party for her future brother-in-law and I know she wants everything to be perfect. "Eli and Kay are still coming, right?"

  "They plan to. Kay told me they were when I talked to her a few days ago."

  Emma visibly relaxes. "This is going to be so much fun. Finn and Rissa are going to be so surprised!"

  "Where are they anyway?"

  "Tank got them dinner reservations at that new French place. They should have just arrived so we have at least two hours before they get back home."

  We ride up to the penthouse and she opens the door with a key. Emma immediately puts me to work crafting crepe paper bows and hanging the small banner she had rolled up in her bag.

  "So, who is this guy? The businessman?" I add when she looks at me blankly.

  "Actually, I'm not sure. Finn said he knew a few people but had to check to see if they could do it. I've invited all his friends so I just assumed whoever it is will be here. Since the party is a surprise, I couldn't exactly ask Finn."

  "Right. Of course."

  She stops fiddling with the streamers she's unrolling. "You're really nervous about this, aren't you?"

  "Well, yeah. I really need help. I just found out yesterday that my family is pulling their investment money.”

  Emma pouts. “Sasha, you know Tank and Finn will invest. They’d love to help.”

  Before she even finishes her sentence, I’m already shaking my head. “Thank you but I really want to do this on my own. The only reason I let Kay and Eli invest is because she’d badger me until I gave in. She knows all my weak spots. That’s the hazard of knowing someone since grade school.”

  “I understand. I didn’t even want to let Tank pay for my school fees so I get it. But you know we’re happy to help if you change your mind.”

  The most amazing thing is that I truly do know. Emma doesn’t have a self-serving bone in her body. She truly wants the best for everyone around her. It’s what makes her such a great friend and I suspect, what makes her so perfect for Tank.

  “I do know that and it means
a lot. It’s just that I’m so close. I know I can do this. But I just need to figure some things out first. I’ve never owned anything before. I need advice. Badly."

  Emma comes over and squeezes my arm. "Don't worry. Finn mentioned that he had several people in mind so you'll have more than one to choose from. Get them drunk enough and you can ask them all the questions you want."

  The intercom buzzes. Emma winks and then opens the door for the caterers.

  In less than half an hour, the place looks ready to go. Most of the guests have arrived. Tank arrives finally and Emma greets him with a relieved sigh. He waves at me from across the room and then sets the case of beer he's holding on the counter.

  Emma taps a spoon against her flute of champagne. "Thank you for coming everyone. Before the guests of honor arrive I just want to say—"

  The front door opens and a woman with a head of curly red hair stumbles through the door backward, her arms and lips attached to Finn. The crowd grows silent and the couple freezes when they realize they aren't alone. Finn looks surprised but not guilty so I figure the woman in his arms must be his fiancée.

  Emma turns to glare at Tank.

  He looks down at his shoes before glancing over at Emma sheepishly. "Oops. I guess my guy at the restaurant forgot to call and warn me that they were on the way home."

  Finn still has his hands on Rissa's behind and doesn't look as though he has any plans to move them. A giggle escapes before I can stop it. Emma still looks pissed but soon she's laughing softly too.

  "Um, surprise!"

  The room erupts into applause and wolf whistles. Rissa extricates herself from Finn's arms even though he doesn't look too happy about it. When her eyes light on the banner I attached to the wide living room window, she lets out a soft gasp.

  "It's a party. For us!"

  She grabs Finn's arm and tows him across the room to where we're standing. Even though Finn still looks murderous, Rissa grabs Emma in a big hug. "Thank you so much. I can't believe you did this for us!"

  Finn shakes hands with his brother. "Yeah, thanks bro. Great timing as usual."