The Middle Finger of Fate (A Trailer Park Princess Cozy Mystery Book 1)

by Kim Hunt Harris

  Sylvia picked up one of the glasses Rey had brought in. What was in those glasses? Rat poison? Something that would eat my insides out?

  I looked at Viv. She was coasting on her tunnel epiphany, which I had to admit, was satisfying to know. Kind of like when you finally figured out where you’d seen that bit actor before. It wasn’t as if that discovery was what we needed to get us out of this mess, but it did seem to put some pep back in her.

  “There is no way you’re going to get away with this,” she said. “You’ll be charged with capital murder.” She looked from Sylvia, to Rey, to Thomas and then to Ricky. Of all of them, only Ricky looked like he might be wavering a little. He also looked the least capable of helping us off this runaway train.

  “We won’t be charged with a thing, since you’re going to both die in a tragic, fiery accident which will be entirely the fault of your alcoholic friend here. Too bad Salem, a known drunk, had to drink and drive off a cliff. Too bad gas is going to leak out and catch the whole car on fire.” She brought the glass over to me and took hold of my chin. “Open up, sweetie. You’re going to like this. It’s your favorite.”

  It could have been all my favorites mixed together and dipped in chocolate and I still was having none of it. I clamped my lips together, feeling foolish but also determined to keep my wits about me. I just thought over the past few days that I wanted a drink. Turned out what I really wanted was to live.

  “Come pry her mouth open,” she ordered Thomas and Rick.

  They did as they were told. Thomas twisted my nose with one hand and grabbed my jaw with the other. I did my best to writhe out of his grip, but with Thomas in front of me and Rick behind me putting a choke hold on my skull, I was pretty much outmatched. I tried to close my throat but choked and swallowed a fiery mouthful.

  “Keep on it,” Sylvia ordered, more in charge of her emotions now. I guess she was one of those people who, when the ball got rolling, found her stride and carried through. Goodie for her. “She’ll need enough in her to make it look legitimate. How many Jack and Cokes can you handle, Salem?” She looked blandly at me, her eyebrows raised. “A drunk like you? Six or eight?”

  I fought to come up for air. They were going to suffocate me before they got me drunk. Thomas was about to break my nose in his death grip. And despite everything, the alcohol was already taking effect. It was hot and liquid down my throat, filling my belly. Adrenalin shooting through me kept the relaxation from transferring to the rest of my body.

  I heard a shuffle and looked up just in time to see Viv launch herself into Sylvia. They both fell across me and the glass flew out of Sylvia’s hand.

  “You old witch!” Rey yelled.

  Sylvia rolled on the floor, squawking about how her knee hurt. She’d hit the concrete floor with all her weight on it, poor baby.

  Rey kicked Viv in the ribs and I screamed at him. Stump went berserk. She came out of the box and stumbled, growling, toward Rey’s leg.

  Thomas kicked her. The son-of-a-pudgy-biscuit-eater kicked her for the second time and sent her skidding across the room. Filled with that superhuman strength that happens when people are put in desperate situations, I launched myself off the floor and threw myself, bound hands and all, at him.

  It was pure pandemonium for a second. It didn’t stop until Sylvia took the gun from Thomas and slammed it into my head. That was the third frigging time she’d hit me in the head and I had just about had enough of it. I decided if I was going to die I’d at least leave some marks on them to give the police a clue. I head butted her as hard as I could in the chin. I heard her teeth clonk together and saw her eyes roll up in her head. She didn’t faint, though. She blinked a few times, then sank to the chair Viv had been in.

  “Get them out of here.” Her voice was thin and tired. “Take them out to the canyon and put Salem in the driver’s seat. Make sure neither one of them has a seat belt on. Get a big rock and knock a hole in the gas tank.” She took a deep breath, let it out, and rubbed a hand over her face. “Make sure you do it someplace they won’t be discovered for a while. I don’t want anyone to see the fire and come running.”

  “Should we kill them before they go over, just in case someone comes by, or in case they don’t die in the crash?” Thomas asked.

  “No, you idiot. They have to have some smoke in their lungs or the police will get suspicious. They have to be alive when the car catches fire.” She stood and rubbed the small of her back. “You’ll have to stick around long enough to know they’re dead. If they get out alive, we’ll all go to prison.” She looked from one to the other. “You do all understand that, don’t you? We’re all equally involved now. Some of us are in even more trouble and don’t need for this to get out.” She looked at Rick.

  He looked, if possible, worse than I felt. Guilty and horrified and panicked.

  “What does she have on you?” I asked.

  Sylvia slapped me. At that point I guessed she was too tired to put any heart into it, so it didn’t hurt too bad. Besides, at that point what was a slap to me, someone who’d been knocked in the head and was about to die a gruesome, fiery death? But that slap told me enough.

  I decided the best thing Viv and I could do was get away from Sylvia. As long as she was running the show, I didn’t have much chance of talking my way out of this.

  I looked at Viv. Her lip was bleeding from the scuffle when she’d thrown herself at me. Her thin hair was sticking out. Her mouth was set in a grim line. I was glad to see she didn’t look scared, just mad as all heck. I hoped that would help us out.

  I nodded at her, hoping to convey to her that I had a plan. I didn’t, but I was doing my best to put one together. I also prayed for everything I was worth. God, tell me what to do. Tell me what to do. Get me out of this. I don’t want to die now.

  I stood when Rey put his hand under my arm. I nodded again at Viv to show her it was okay, we were going to be okay. She stood but jerked her arm away from Thomas.

  “I can walk, thank you very much.” She stuck her nose in the air and walked out the door like he was a slow maitre’d.

  Rey frowned when he got the door open to the pickle-mobile. “It figures you’d drive this piece of crap car, Salem.”

  I smiled at him. “Haven’t you ever driven on a pickle bucket? You’re in for a treat.” I climbed in the backseat and slid around on the junk back there. Rick climbed in after me, having to fold his body in half to fit, and Thomas pushed Viv in after him.

  Rey and Thomas mumbled to themselves as Rey drove out of the parking lot. “Dude, I hope we don’t all die in this car,” Thomas said, serious concern on his face as he watched Rey try to stay up.

  “You’ll get the hang of it,” I told him. “Just don’t make any sudden moves.”

  I, on the other had, had to make my move soon; I didn’t want to be out of town before I took action. Besides, having my shoulders pinched back like that hurt like the dickens and my head swam from the liquor.

  I turned to Ricky, keeping my voice low. “I don’t know what they have on you, but I guarantee it’s not as bad as helping them commit murder.”

  He stared straight ahead, looking sick.

  “Sylvia probably has you convinced you have no options, but that’s not true. Viv and I will both testify that they made you do this. I’ll swear on my life that you were forced to be here. I know in my heart you don’t want to do this. I know you wouldn’t be here if you thought you had any other choice.”

  His jaw worked and from the streetlights that flashed by I thought I saw a shiny spot in the corner of his eye.

  “It’s not too late. We can stop this now before you get in too deep and Sylvia gets you into prison. Viv and I will testify that you were blackmailed and that you helped us escape. We’ll do everything we can to make sure you get off as lightly as possible. What does she have on you, Rick? What is she using to force you to do this?”

  He clenched his teeth together and, barely turning his head, he looked from the back of Rey�
�s head to me. He looked like someone caught in a trap.

  “What is it, Rick? Maybe I can help you. Don’t forget that you have something on Sylvia now, too. You know she committed murder. You can use that. You can plea bargain your testimony against her in exchange for a light deal in whatever she’s using against you. You can do that, I know the D.A. would go for that.”

  “You don’t know jack!” Rick whispered. “You have no idea what’s going on or what to do about it.”

  “I know that helping them commit two more murders isn’t going to help you!” I hissed back. Man, my arms were screaming and the alcohol had me fighting to keep on task. I leaned up and looked at Viv. Her face was white and her chin sagged against her chest. She gave me a look that chilled me. She looked like she’d already given up.

  Rey threw a look over his shoulder. “They behaving back there, dude? Not giving you any trouble, are they?”

  “Salem’s about passed out and the old lady looks like she died already.” Rick shot a look at me that said I’d better keep my mouth shut.

  I did, for a few seconds. We were going over the flyover to the interstate now. A few more miles and we’d be exiting to head out to the canyon. Nobody would be on that road this time of night. If we were going to do something, it had to be now.

  “Just think about it,” I said, trying not to sound desperate. “You know more about this crime than anyone except the guilty parties, I’ll bet. You can hand the D.A. a case all wrapped up in a shiny package. You can make their jobs so much easier. Of course they’ll go for that. Ricky, don’t you want to go home to that pretty wife and daughter? Don’t you want all this to be over?”

  He whipped his head toward me. “Of course that’s what I want! That’s all I want. That’s all I’ve wanted for the past three years was just to have a normal life, to keep out of trouble and be a good husband and a good father. Sylvia promised me that if I helped Rey out this time she’d make sure nothing ever came back to haunt me and mess that up.”

  Three years. Three years Sylvia had been holding something over Rick’s head.

  Rick’s brother John died three years ago. But he’d been drunk, the crash was his own fault.

  I took a stab in the dark. “You were with John when he died?”

  He shook his head. “No, I wasn’t with him then. I was with him before.”

  I got it then. Rick and John had been drinking together before John had his accident. Possibly Rick could have been charged with involuntary manslaughter if he’d contributed to John drinking and then driving. I knew all about that kind of thing. Way more than I wanted to know.

  “You know, don’t you, that the deal with John isn’t anything like this?”

  He stared at the back of Thomas’s seat and didn’t answer.

  “You know that a charge like that can be reduced to probation, to house arrest. It’s nothing like murder, Rick. This is going to be murder, first degree –”

  “I can’t let my wife know!” he said suddenly. “I can’t let her know about John, I can’t let her know about this. She’d never understand, she thinks I’m a saint, she thinks I’m the best thing that ever happened to her. If I lose her and Kaylee I couldn’t go on, Salem. I have to make this work somehow, I can’t –”

  A shriek pierced the air and like a gray blur Viv shot out of her seat. She thudded into Rey’s back, her arms still tight behind her.

  The car swerved sharply to the left, toward the median. Rey yelled a curse and wrenched the wheel back to the right. The tires squealed and we were sideways in the middle of the interstate, leaning hard toward the driver’s side.

  Rick and I were thrown against Viv. I heard a lot of screaming and realized most of it was coming from me, but I couldn’t stop. I thought that if all our weight was on that one side of the car, surely it would have to tip all the way over and flip. I didn’t know if any of us would live through that.

  With strength born of desperation, I threw my body up and back, hitting the passenger side of the car as hard as I could. The car bounced back with all four tires on the ground. For once I was glad I was packing all that extra weight.

  Rey was in the back seat now, tangled up with Viv and Rick. Thomas gave short little yelps as he tried to take control of the wheel. We headed up the steep embankment toward the frontage road and the bridge for 50th Street. Rey’s door popped open and for some bizarre reason Thomas lunged for it. We bounced hard and he went sailing out.

  Rey was like a turtle stuck on his back, lunging over and over to get up and unable to do so. Viv slid down and sat on him. He growled at her but he couldn’t do much about it.

  I had to give Viv credit for taking charge of the situation, but I wasn’t so sure this was our best choice. Still, it was what it was and I supposed I should make the best of the situation.

  I threw myself over the seat with the vague notion that I would throw myself onto the steering wheel and somehow direct it with my shoulder or chin, anything I could do to get it under control and the car stopped.

  In the headlights, a stop sign appeared, impossibly close. The next moment we crashed into the pole, and my head went through the windshield.

  Chapter Sixteen

  When I came to, everything was bizarrely quiet. For a moment, I wondered if I was dead, if we all were dead, because it was so quiet. I felt the metal of the car hood under my cheek, and heard the ping and pop of the motor.

  That, coupled with the sudden realization of intense pain in my head and my right leg, made me think I wasn’t dead. I didn’t know about everyone else, though. I thought if I could get my head up I could check.

  I looked around me, but saw only the side of the hill where we’d landed. But my leg was stuck. I tried to slide down the hood to the ground, but I didn’t get anywhere. I realized my jeans were stuck on the broken windshield. I tugged frantically at my legs and finally, by some miracle, I was able to get the fabric ripped off. I felt something warm on my cheek and smelled blood. I reached up and felt a big gash across my forehead and up over my scalp. My hand came away soaked in blood.

  That freaked me out. I let out a strangled cry and tumbled off the hood of the car into the grass. I heard a whimpering sound, and this time it wasn’t me.

  Stump! I bolted up and looked around. “Stump? Where are you?”

  I couldn’t see her. I heard sirens now, and saw something moving through the grass. Too big to be Viv, and definitely too big to be Stump.

  I couldn’t see Stump anywhere. It was too dark, and my eyes weren’t working so good at the moment. I clamped my hand over my head and cried like I had when I was a kid and fell off my bike. I sounded like an idiot. I didn’t care.

  “Stump! Viv! Where are you? Are you okay? Oh God, please help us!”

  The figure moving through the grass stopped. It was Ricky, I realized when he was reflected in passing headlights. He bent over, looking at something in the grass. He threw a look back at me, then straightened again and took off running.

  Let him go. To heck with him. He and Thomas and Rey could all run. I would find some way to convince Bobby they were guilty. I stumbled along the ground, calling for Stump.

  The sirens grew louder, and I saw flashing lights on the other side of the interstate. I couldn’t hear anymore whimpering from Stump, and that scared me. I also didn’t hear anything from Viv, and that scared me too. I’m not going on record as to which one scared me more.

  “Stump! Viv! Talk to me. Where are you? Are you okay?” I crawled to the back of the car, one hand still clamped against my scalp while blood leaked and ran down the side of my face, exhaustion weighing down on me. “Stump!”

  Ricky stopped and looked back at me. Then he turned, walked back a step and picked up whatever he’d been looking at in the grass.

  It was Stump. She lay still in Rick’s arms as he carried her up the hill. I was still crying, and I cried even harder when he put her in my arms. She was alive, but she lay too still for my taste. I kissed her and prayed as hard as I ev
er had that she’d be okay.

  The sirens chewed up the silence in the air and flashing lights strobed around us. The siren cut off abruptly, but the night spun with the flashing lights and people jumped from the ambulance and raced toward us.

  “Back here!” Rick cried. “She’s bleeding! She needs an ambulance.”

  “Where’s Viv?” I asked Rick, but he was gone around to the other side of the car.

  “In here, too,” I heard him say. “She’s unconscious.”

  “I’m not unconscious,” Viv groused faintly. “I’ve been in an accident. I have a right to sit and rest my eyes for a second without everyone getting all up in arms about it. Just get that – get that light out of my face if you don’t mind.” Her tone stated plainly she didn’t care if he minded or not. “I am fine. I just need to catch my breath.”

  “That’s good news, ma’am,” said a new male voice. “All the same, I think I’ll let the EMTs take you in and have the doctors look at you. Just lie back now. They’ll be here in a second.”

  “Well, okay,” Viv said. She sounded weak, wobbly. She was giving up without much of a fight. Not a good sign.

  The cop came around and knelt in the grass beside me. “Hang on, ma’am, the paramedics are on their way. Want to tell me what happened? Who was driving this car?”

  “Rey Ramirez.”

  He motioned to Rick. “Him?” He lifted my hand off my leg and swore. “I need a gurney over here!”

  “No, that’s Ricky. He wasn’t driving, he was kidnapped like we were. Rey ran off, and you need to call for backup to catch him and catch Thomas, too. Thomas is Rey’s cousin. And while you’re at it, call for someone to arrest Sylvia Ramirez. She was last seen at her laundromat on 21st Street. She’s guilty of the murder of Lucinda Cruz and of the attempted murder of me and Viv, and –”

  “Why don’t you just lie back and save your breath? We can get a statement at the hospital.”

  Then he stood and spoke into the radio handset clipped to his shoulder, “Sloan, I have contact with the party you’ve been looking for, 50th and the Interstate.”