Birds in Paradise

by Dorothy McFalls

  He was dressed from head to toe in villainous black. Black military boots, black combat pants, black flak jacket, even his hair was the color of the midnight sky. Not only that, a large assault rifle was slung over his shoulder and a menacing pistol jutted out from a black leather leg holster.

  I tried to twist away from him to break his crushing hold on my wrist. I’d learned in a self-defense course I’d taken in college that the purpose of pepper spray is to blind your assailant long enough to escape him. I’d even perfected my quick dodge technique during the class’s mock attacks. I should have been able to sprint several blocks away by now. But I couldn’t go anywhere because this gun-toting bully stubbornly refused to play by the rules and let go of me.

  Why wouldn’t he let go? In a blind panic, I let loose a Xena Warrior Princess battle yell and landed a bruising kick to his shin.

  “Ow!” he shouted, but his grip held firm. I kicked him again.

  With a disgusted grunt, he twirled me around until my backside was pressed against his muscular legs and chest. He cinched his arm around my waist, pinning me so close to him I had no hope of using any kind of leverage against his brute strength.

  “Let go,” I wheezed.

  “Not until you stop attacking me.” He swore under his breath while I twisted and turned and wore myself out. “This is what I get for playing the Good Samaritan, a hellcat with claws. If you don’t stop scratching me, I swear I will—”

  “Wait a minute.” He thought I was attacking him? I’m the good guy here. What would make him think I would willingly attack anyone? “Wait a minute.”

  As soon as I stopped kicking and punching and, yes, scratching him, he released his crushing hold. I stumbled forward a few steps before regaining my balance. Breathing hard, I grabbed my knees and tried to sort out what had just happened. Was it possible I’d overreacted? He hadn’t actually attacked me. He’d only touched my arm. I was the one who’d—

  “Let—let me get this straight,” I huffed, still unable to fully catch my breath. “You’re not trying to kill me?”

  He didn’t seem to be listening. With his shoulders hunched forward, he clamped his straight white teeth tightly together. Hopping on one foot, he cursed his existence and mine. I winced. His bloodshot, unfocused eyes were watering like a faucet because of me. He was blinking wildly, clearly suffering because I’d reacted too quickly and had thoroughly doused him with the potent, red-hot pepper oil.

  Despite his arsenal, he didn’t look that much like a killer, not really. His muscular yet trim physique was much more reminiscent of a heroic Roman warrior. His square jaw spoke of strength. His brows, though creased with intense pain, suggested a man of compassion and, I hoped, forgiveness. Because he wasn’t a killer. His distinctive black uniform identified him as a member of the Counter Assault Team, which was no ordinary branch of the Secret Service, but its most elite military arm.

  “You—you’re Secret Service?” I asked, suddenly hoping I was hallucinating. Assaulting a Secret Service agent was most likely a felony.

  “Yes,” he hissed through gritted teeth.

  Even if it wasn’t a felony, I was sure blinding a Secret Service agent wasn’t something Gordon or Ambrose Jones, the White House’s chief usher, would likely forgive. I rushed to my backpack and quickly found my environmentally friendly, BPA-free water bottle. Moving as fast as possible, I unscrewed the lid and tossed the water into his face.

  He gave a startled yelp when the icy water hit him.

  “Give me that.” He grabbed the water bottle and dumped the remaining water on his mottled forehead and brow. The cold water caused him to shiver like the leaves on the saucer magnolia trees above us. Then he scrubbed his eyes with his coat sleeve. He still looked miserable. The skin around his eyes was puffy and turning an angry shade of red, but he didn’t seem to be blinking as furiously anymore.

  “Thanks.” He dropped the water bottle and grabbed my shoulders. He squinted at me, his eyes unfocused. “Are you okay?” he demanded, his voice unnaturally calm considering the situation.

  I nodded.

  “Answer me. Are you okay?” he repeated. Apparently, he couldn’t yet see well enough to make out my gesture. “Do I need to call EMS?”

  “No,” I croaked and quickly cleared my throat, which burned as if I’d been shouting at the top of my lungs for hours.

  “Good.” He released me and started to pace. Limp, step, limp, step. Turn. Limp, step, limp, step. He stomped with that awkward gait through the middle of my flowerbed. The helpless tulips and fragrant grape hyacinths were no match for his heavy boots.

  I winced both for my plants and for him. He wouldn’t be limping if I hadn’t kicked him. He wouldn’t be growling with every step if I hadn’t blinded him with my pepper spray. He stumbled a couple of times, proving his eyesight wasn’t even close to being back to normal. But I had enough experience with men’s egos to know to keep my mouth shut. An apology right now would not be appreciated.

  He stopped at the edge of the flowerbed. “Before I radio for backup . . .” he began before turning his gaze heavenward. Muttering a curse to the heavy clouds above, he dredged his fingers through his wavy black hair. “There’s no way around it. I’m going to have to file a report about this . . . this . . .” he grumbled more to himself than to me.

  In my three short months at the White House, I’d seen the Counter Assault Team, or CAT, as they liked to call themselves, only a few times. They were one of the least visible segments of the Secret Service. They traveled everywhere with the President like the Secret Service agents who dressed in neatly pressed suits. But unlike their suited counterparts, CAT agents didn’t make regular security sweeps of the President’s Park.

  “And look at this.” He held up a loose wire that had been attached to his earpiece. “You’ve broken my radio.”

  I’d always found the regular Secret Service agents easy to work with. They always had a smile and a polite manner. Not one of them had ever growled at me.

  CAT agents, on the other hand, only ventured outside their tight protection circle when they were taking part in a training exercise or responding to a specific threat against the First Family. They were a very serious group.

  I doubted I would fare well in his report. While mentally drafting my résumé, I started to move away from him to gather my backpack and gardening tools. He snagged hold of my arm. “Let’s start with you giving me some basic information, like your name.”

  “Casey—Casey Calhoun.” My heart was really pounding now. I wished he’d just shoot me and put me out of my misery. His grip tightened on my arm. “I’m Gordon Sims’s new assistant.” Everyone knew Gordon. He was a fixture, a one-man institution. But the agent’s pained expression remained unchanged, which only made me more nervous. Was it possible? Did he not know Gordon? “I—I’m a gardener.”

  My slightly eccentric but altogether lovable aunts, Willow and Alba, and Grandmother Faye back in Charleston, South Carolina, had instilled in me a love of gardening as well as an absurd fondness for ice cream desserts. But I suspected he didn’t care to hear about any of that.

  I decided to take the initiative. “I’m kind of in a hurry. So if it’s okay with you, I’d like to clear up this misunderstanding as quickly as possible. I have a meeting scheduled with the First Lady this morning to present my plans on how to transform the White House gardens into the White House organic gardens.”

  “We’ll see about that.” His red-rimmed gaze traveled up and down my mud-caked legs. I had a sinking feeling he was plotting to make my life at the White House a living hell. I bit the inside of my cheek. He couldn’t really get me fired, could he?

  He narrowed his bloodshot eyes and leaned toward me. “Now tell me, Ms. Calhoun, why did you attack me?”

  Available in paperback and e-book: FLOWERBED OF STATE

  Thank You for Reading

  BIRDS IN PARADISE

  If you enjoyed this book, I would appreciate it if you’d help other readers
enjoy it too. After all, most books are sold by word of mouth. What can you do?

  Recommend it. Please help other readers find this book by recommending it to friends, readers’ groups, and discussion boards.

  Review it. Please tell other readers why you liked this book by reviewing it on Amazon, Goodreads, or your blog.

  If you write and post a review on one of these sites, please send me an email to dorothymcfalls@att.net. I would like to gift you a copy of one of the ebooks listed below. Just let me know which one.

  Thank you!

  Also available on Kindle:

  The Nude (Regency Romance)

  Upon my honor! If not for that shocking painting... It has ruined everything, simply everything. A handsome marquess promises to repair my tattered reputation. But how can I trust him or his clever kisses when he's clearly hiding a deep, dark secret of his own?

  The Marriage List (originally published by Signet Regency, May 2005)

  Compelled by his family to marry, Viscount Radford Evers makes a list of his requirements for a wife. Humble tenant May Sheffers meets none of these, so why does his heart beat madly at the sight of her?

  Lady Iona’s Rebellion (Regency Romance)

  When obedient Lady Iona is pressured into accepting a husband of her father's choosing, she seeks out notorious rake, Lord Nathan Wynter, for lessons in rebellion.

  Lady Sophie’s Midnight Seduction (Sensual short Regency Romance)

  In this SHORT STORY, Lady Sophie, a self-avowed spinster, has been happy with her independence for many years...that is until Lord Benton-Black enters her world. Now she finds her nights haunted by this man who is determined to seduce her and make her his wife.

  Taken By Moonlight (Sensual Paranormal Regency Romance Novella)

  A Wizard For Christmas (Contemporary Short Paranormal Romance) Protectors #1

  Holly desperately wants a perfect Christmas, and she's perfectly willing to make herself miserable getting one. Unfortunately, there are forces at play that threaten more than her holidays...her life is in danger. And the only one who seems to know what's going on is a darkly handsome, but mysterious, stranger who makes her want to add "romance" to this year's Christmas wish list.

  Neptune’s Lair (Contemporary Paranormal Romance) Protectors #2

  It's worse than a bad hair day! Dallas's new lover is taking control in the bedroom, and an unworldly force is threatening her soul.

  Mystical Seduction (Contemporary Paranormal Romance) Protectors #3

  Faith was looking for a one-night stand. What she got was an otherworldly hunk who’s determined to make her his sex slave and a monster determined to kill her.

  The Huntress (Contemporary Romantic Suspense)

  Spunky bounty hunter Vega Brookes meets her match when she hunts down a dangerous ex-special forces officer accused of murder.

  Birds in Paradise (Short light-hearted mystery) Writing as: Dorothy St. James

  In this novella-length story, young prostitutes are disappearing from the streets of Honolulu. When street-savvy P.I., Kyra Grainger, is hired to find the latest missing girl, she straps on a pair of high heels, pulls on a skirt no wider than a headband, and delves into the back streets and shadowy world hidden behind the glitz of Hawaii. What she finds is a web of lies and deceptions that threatens to destroy the paradise she's grown to love.

  About the Author

  For Regency and mystery author, Dorothy McFalls happily-ever-after is more than just a fictional ending, having enjoyed every day of marriage to her sexy sculptor husband. Formerly an environmental urban planner, she now writes full time. For information about Dorothy's upcoming books, visit her website at http://www.dorothymcfalls.com/

  Dorothy also writes cozy mysteries as Dorothy St. James, including the White House Gardener Mystery series, which critics have called “spunky” and “fast-paced.” Learn more about her mystery releases at http://www.dorothystjames.com/

  Catch the White House Gardener Mysteries from Berkley Prime Crime written by Dorothy St. James:

  Flowerbed of State: Casey's passion for organic gardening and eye for detail have carried her into the most important patch of land in America--the President's Park, on which sits the most important home in America: the White House. But while she's readying the final touches on an innovative cultivation program for the First Lady to inspect, she's attacked from behind by an unknown assailant who then disappears. When she comes to, she notices some damaged foliage that leads her and the Secret Service to a dead woman in a trash can. With the biggest opportunity of her life ready to bloom, and all the President's men plowing up her perfect plans, Casey has to dig in and root out a killer before she ends up planted herself...

  “Credible characters, a fast-paced plot, and a light look at political life in Washington, D.C., will delight cozy fans.” ~ Publishers Weekly

  “This spunky new romantic suspense series is an obvious pick for readers who enjoy Julie Hyzy's "White House Chef" series (Buffalo West Wing), but also think of gardening mystery series such as Rosemary Harris's (Slugfest).”~Library Journal

  The Scarlet Pepper: As the official organic gardener for the White House, Casey Calhoun is usually up to her elbows in something or other. But when someone starts tampering with the Presidential vegetable garden, she soon finds herself in way over her head. As if it wasn’t bad enough that red peppers are growing instead of green ones and cabbage is popping up where the First Lady’s favorite lettuce should be—a hard-nosed investigative reporter is found dead after targeting the unpopular Secretary of State. Raking over the clues and rumors, Casey knows that someone is sabotaging both her garden and the First Lady’s reputation. But when she has one close call too many, Casey realizes that the next thing buried in the dirt might just be her…

  “This cozy gets my highest recommendation, a perfect escape, and it should be in your in your hot little hands as you prepare your own gardens. Definitely a must "seed" story!!!" ~ Escape with Dollycas Blog

  "A potboiler of homicide, blackmail, journalism, power and sex - but one that St. James handles with taste as well as verve - "The Scarlet Pepper" fulfills the promise of last year's series debut, "Flowerbed of State," and then some." ~ Richmond Times-Dispatch

  Coming April 2013: Oak and Dagger

  Visit Dorothy St. James at:

  http://www.dorothystjames.com

  http://www.facebook.com/dorothy.stjames