Kiss & Sell

by Brittany Geragotelis

  “What?” I nearly shrieked. If I’d known anyone else was going to read my note to myself, I would’ve talked about food, or the weather, or Miley Cyrus. “Mrs. Glass, are you sure you wouldn’t rather just read our papers instead?”

  “I’ll be reading them at the end. It is my writing assignment, you know,” Mrs. Glass answered coolly. “Unless you have a better exercise in mind?”

  As far as I was concerned, any exercise had to be better than having one of my classmates read my paper, but I held my tongue.

  “No,” I answered, finally. I looked to my left to see who I’d be sharing my embarrassing, personal thoughts with and felt myself grow faint. Passing out would’ve just been icing on the cake, given the circumstances.

  Of course, of all the people I could exchange papers with, it had to be a popular like Dan Stevenson. I so didn’t want him reading all about my freak out. I might as well stand up now and say, “Hi, I’m not only a member of the geek squad, but I’m also the club president.”

  “You ready to switch, Sawyer?” Dan asked, holding out his paper, and smiling at me.

  “Uh, yeah,” I said, even though I felt like doing anything but. “Just remember, it’s totally fiction, okay?”

  “Sure. Of course. Mine too,” he said, smiling easily again. I found myself grinning back at him, despite my growing anxiety, and noticed how his hazel eyes crinkled in the corners.

  The sound of shuffling papers around me snapped me back to earth, and I reluctantly broke my eye contact with Dan to begin reading his letter.

  Dear Dan,

  Yo, man, how’ve you been? Long time, no talk. Anyways, let’s cut to the chase. Dude, have you heard about that chick at your school, who’s selling a kiss on the Internet?

  I felt myself begin to blush for about the tenth time that day. Did everyone know about this kissing thing? So much for fading into the background.

  You should definitely think about asking her out. She’s totally cute, sweet and obviously has some balls, since she was able to put all that right out there. You’ve clearly been blind for not having noticed her before. So, buck up, man, and ask the girl out—before I do.

  Peace out, dude,

  Stan

  I was confused—and totally flustered. Was this some sort of joke to play on the girl who had no play? Or was this his way of…flirting?

  Glancing at Dan out of the corner of my eye, I saw that he was scribbling all over my paper, but still had that goofy grin on his face. Turning my attention back to Dan’s paper, I quickly wrote some B.S. answer to his letter and then turned it upside down on my desk and waited—impatiently—for Mrs. Glass to collect it.

  When the bell finally rang, I gathered my things as quickly as I could and booked it out of the classroom. I didn’t even dare look at anyone as I headed straight for my locker. I deposited a few of my books on one of the shelves and then examined myself in my magnetic locker mirror. I looked into my familiar, pretty green eyes, and smoothed a few errant hairs, which had come loose from my ponytail. Then I applied a thin layer of Chapstick to my lips, before placing it back in my pocket.

  When I slammed my locker door shut, Dan was standing beside me.

  “Oh!” I exclaimed, surprised to see him so up-close-and-personal. I wasn’t positive, but I had a feeling he’d been waiting for me.

  “That’s not exactly the reaction I was going for, but okay,” Dan said with a smirk.

  “Uh, you just…scared me, that’s all,” I said, and instantly realized how dumb that sounded. Stupid, stupid, stupid. “I mean, what’s up, Dan?”

  “Not much, Sawyer,” he said and leaned his head against the locker door. We were both silent for a moment. Finally he added, “So, what did you think about my paper?”

  That was a very good question.

  I started to chew on my lip and tried to avoid looking straight at him. “Um. It was definitely…imaginative,” I answered slowly. Was he trying to make me nervous or did he just have that affect on girls?

  “Thanks,” he answered. “I thought so.”

  I grew silent again. I still wasn’t quite sure what he was doing here. At my locker. Talking to me.

  “Well, I decided to take some advice from my friend, Stan, and see if you wanted to hang out Friday night?” he finally asked, lowering his voice a bit as if we were having a private conversation.

  “Huh?” I asked, blankly.

  Have I mentioned I’m a smooth talker?

  “You know. Do that thing where I pick you up, we get some pizza, see a movie and then I take you home. That sort of thing,” he said, playfully.

  “Like…a date?” I asked, still a little slow on the pick-up.

  “Yeah. Like, a date,” Dan said, chuckling at my reaction.

  I studied his face, and was surprised to find that he wasn’t joking.

  “Okay.” I forced myself to sound calm, even though I felt a little like puking. “Sounds like fun.”

  “Sweet,” Dan said, standing up straighter. “So, pick you up at seven?”

  “Sure,” I answered, grinning stupidly.

  “Okay, then. See ya, Sawyer,” Dan said as he turned and walked away.

  I stared at him as he moved down the hallway. I couldn’t help but admire how his shirt clung to his back and his jeans fit perfectly around his…

  “Was that Dan Stevenson just talking to you?” McCartney asked, interrupting my Britney Spears-esque not-so-innocent thoughts.

  “Yep,” I answered, taking one last glance at Dan, before he disappeared around the corner. I turned to face McCartney and we began to walk to our History class. “He just asked me out. On a date. For Friday.”

  “No way!” McCartney squealed, jumping up and down and clapping her hands.

  “Why is that so hard to believe?” I asked. She stared at me and raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow. I caved. “Okay. I can’t believe it either.”

  As we walked, I told her everything. Beginning with the letter and ending with our date plans.

  “That’s wicked cool!” McCartney said, as we walked into class and sat down next to each other.

  “Yeah, but do you think he’s asking me out because of this eBay thing, or because he suddenly realized what a totally awesome catch I am?” I whispered as other students started filling in the desks around us.

  “Who cares! Dan Stevenson just asked you out,” McCartney hissed. “For once, don’t analyze everything. Just enjoy it.”

  McCartney was right. Who cares why Dan asked me out? The point was he wanted to hang out with me—Arielle Sawyer. Nothing could ruin this moment.

  “Pop quiz!” their teacher yelled out.

  Except maybe for that.

  “YOU’VE GOTTA HELP me find the perfect outfit,” I said, nearing hysterics as I tore through my closet.

  “We told you we’d help,” McCartney said from her spot on my bed. “But first, you have got to calm down. You’re running around like You’re on fire.”

  “I’m going out with Dan Stevenson tonight,” I said, stopping in my tracks. “I might as well be on fire.”

  “You are such a drama queen,” Phin said from across the room. “He’s just a dude. Like me. He puts his pants on one leg at a time like everyone else.”

  “Maybe so, but those pants he puts on look soooo good,” I cooed as I thought of him. “And he’s not like you. He’s popular, remember?”

  “Thanks for the reminder,” Phin answered sarcastically.

  “You know what I mean,” I answered, going back to pacing around in front of my closet.

  McCartney got off the bed and placed her hands on my shoulders forcefully. Girl was strong. “You go get in the shower and we’ll find you an outfit,” she said, pushing me toward the bathroom.

  “Shower,” I said slowly. “Right. Probably a good idea.”

  “Showering is definitely a good idea,” Phin said, waving his hand in front of his face. “You don’t want him smelling the real you.”

  I glared at him before di
sappearing into my bathroom.

  Once the door was locked behind me, I turned the knob on the tub and watched as steam filled the room around me. I waited until I could no longer see my outstretched hand and then stepped under the hot stream. I let my thoughts slip away and concentrated on the steady thumping of water as it massaged my head. Before long, my nerves were nearly gone and I’d almost forgotten about my date.

  Almost.

  Eventually, I emerged from the room smelling considerably better than I had going in. Even girlie-like.

  “Put these on.” McCartney handed me a jean skirt and a shimmery black top that I didn’t recognize.

  “Where’d this come from?” I asked, eyeing the top.

  “I figured you might need something a little un-Arielle,” McCartney said, shrugging. “So, I brought it from home.”

  “Thank you?” I said, not sure whether my wardrobe had just been insulted or not. “Phin, can you turn around?”

  “Not a problem,” Phin said, holding up his hands and turning to face the wall.

  I let my towel drop to the ground and stepped into the skirt after I threw the top over my head.

  “I’m dressed now,” I said to Phin and then modeled the outfit for them. “So?”

  “Hello, Megan Fox-y!” McCartney said, nodding approvingly. “I knew you had it in you!”

  “I don’t know,” I said checking myself out in the mirror. I wrinkled my nose and chewed on my lip thoughtfully. “You don’t think there’s too much cleavage?”

  I pulled the top up a bit and then watched as it fell back down to its original place, exposing some of my nearly-flat chest.

  “Um. As a guy, I can safely say there’s no such thing as too much cleavage,” Phin said. “Not that I want to see yours or anything.”

  “Good to know,” I said and examined myself again. “Okay, so I’ve got the outfit, now I just need to do my hair and makeup.

  “Already on it,” McCartney said, holding up a hairdryer.

  Thirty minutes later, my hair was blown out, my makeup was done and I was officially ready for my date. My stomach, however, wasn’t quite as excited about the outing as my mind was.

  “You guys, I feel sort of nauseous,” I said, lying facedown on my bed. “I don’t think I can go through with this.”

  “You’re just nervous,” McCartney said. “Once you guys start talking, you’ll feel better.”

  “Yeah, Arielle, buck up,” Phin said. “Stop being such a chick.”

  “Hello? In case you hadn’t noticed, I am a chick,” I said, standing up and placing my hands on my hips. “And I happen to recall a certain incident at school when you up-chucked while talking to Cindy Rossum, so don’t even talk to me about ‘bucking up.’ ”

  “Dude, that was in fifth grade and I told you, I had the flu,” Phin said, frowning.

  “Yeah, the crush flu,” McCartney said, smirking.

  “You’re such a brat,” Phin retorted.

  “At least I’m not a huge dork who pukes on girls,” she responded in a sing-song voice. “Tell me, did the creators of ‘South Park’ base stan after you? Or is that just a rumor?”

  Before anyone could come to blows, the familiar chime of my doorbell rang and we all jumped up quickly.

  “I’ve never been so happy to be saved by the bell before,” I said, taking one last look in the mirror and then grabbing my jacket and purse. “Thanks for getting my mind off of things, guys.”

  “Anytime we can help you by fighting…” McCartney said with a grin.

  I ran downstairs and headed for the door.

  “Have fun tonight, honey,” my mom yelled out from her place on the couch. “Any questions you have before going out?”

  “No,” I yelled, embarrassed. The last thing I needed was another “birds and bees” lecture from my mother. Talk about feeling sick. A convo like that would definitely send me over the edge and into barfsville.

  I placed my hand on the doorknob, but hesitated before opening the door. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Was I really ready for this?

  My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the bell ringing a second time. Before I could stall any longer, I opened the door and plastered a huge smile on my face.

  Five minutes later, I was sitting next to Dan in the front seat of his beat-up Corolla. Thankfully, the radio was on, because we’d just hit a lull in the conversation. We’d already made small talk for a couple of blocks and since this was foreign territory for me, I had no idea what I was supposed to say. So, I finally took to checking Dan out as he drove instead.

  He was wearing faded blue jeans and an untucked, button-down blue and white checkered shirt. His blond hair was spiked up all over his head, but not greasy like some of the guys at school wore it. It looked soft, like you could run your hands through it…

  Whoa, Nelly. The date hadn’t even started yet and I was already thinking about getting to second base. I’d had no idea I was such a fantasy slut! I turned away from Dan and looked out the window.

  The music faded out on the radio as the DJs told the audience what songs we’d been listening to.

  “Hey, DJ Dave, have you heard about this teenager at Ronald Henry High school?” said one of the on-air personalities.

  The mention of our school caught both of our attention, and Dan looked at me curiously before leaning over and turning up the volume.

  “You mean the girl who’s selling a kiss on eBay?” DJ Dave responded.

  “That’s the one,” the other said.

  “Arielle! Dude, you’re famous!” Dan exclaimed, turning his head and smiling at me. “This is totally cool!”

  “Cool” wasn’t exactly the word I was thinking of at that particular moment. In fact, the words, “humiliating,” “painful” and “please shoot me now,” were repeatedly running through my head.

  “Or totally embarrassing,” I muttered under my breath. I silently begged the DJs to switch to a new topic, but luck obviously wasn’t on my side, because they kept talking.

  “It’s gotta be kind of harsh being a freshman in high school and still not having had your first kiss,” DJ Dave exclaimed. “I don’t know about you, but I was about eight when I kissed a girl for the first time.”

  “Yeah, and I bet it was another five years before you got another chance, right buddy?” the first DJ chuckled.

  “Ha, ha, wise guy. I just can’t imagine being in this chick’s position. I mean I’ve got to hand it to her for putting herself out there like that,” DJ Dave said. “Sweetie, if you’re out there listening to this, don’t trip just yet. Guys like it when a girl takes matters into her own hands. I’m sure you’ll be getting that kiss in no time.”

  Gee, thanks for the pep talk, DJ Dave.

  “Don’t tell me that you’re going to be bidding on that first kiss of hers?” his buddy said in mock shock.

  Ew, gross. Talk about dirty old men.

  “With the amount of bids she’s got so far, I don’t think I could afford it even if I wanted to,” he laughed and a moment later, music resumed on the station.

  Thank God it was over, but now I was stuck in the car with Dan. In this awkward silence. As we both reflected on what had just happened. I couldn’t bear to look over at him—I was too horrified to think of the look that might be on his face. Luckily Dan took his cue from me and didn’t say anything else until we pulled into the movie theater parking lot.

  Turning off the engine, he looked over at me and asked, “You ready to go?”

  I nodded, still mortified over the radio incident.

  “Hey,” Dan said and placed his hand on mine. “You okay?”

  “You seriously still want to hang out with me after all that?” I asked, looking down at my lap.

  “Are you kidding? You’re unlike anyone I’ve ever met before, Arielle,” he said, a smile growing on his face. “Besides, it’s like I’m going out with a celebrity.”

  Just what a girl wants. To be a celebrity known for being kissably challen
ged.

  I laughed nervously as I got out of the car and followed him toward the theater.

  “I’ve been waiting to see this movie for like, ever,” Dan said once we were seated in the theater. He’d practically bought out the snack bar when we’d arrived. There was a giant tub of popcorn, nachos, M&Ms, Raisinettes and two extra large sodas resting on the seat beside us.

  “Uh, didn’t this movie just come out tonight?” I asked, as I watched Dan shove a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

  “Yeah, but I’ve wanted to see it since I saw the previews last Friday,” he said. A little bit of faux butter dripped down the side of his mouth and onto his chin.

  “I can see how that would seem like forever,” I said, jokingly.

  “I know, huh?” Dan answered sincerely. “Do you like scary movies?”

  I was surprised he was even asking me the question now, since he hadn’t bothered to bring it up before he’d bought our tickets. I’d still been in such a surreal fog at the thought of being out with him and all, that I hadn’t thought to mention my totally irrational fear of horror movies. I’d barely been able to make it through the first five minutes of The Ring and then had proceeded to sleep with my bedroom light on for nearly a month.

  “Not really,” I answered truthfully. “They kind of freak me out.”

  “That’s cool,” Dan answered, giving me one of his grins. “If you get scared, you can just grab onto me.”

  As tempting as that sounded—anyone with a pulse could notice how good Dan smelled—I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to make it through the movie without hiding my head in the hoodie of my jacket. And what kind of impression would that make on a guy like Dan? Hiding in a hoodie wasn’t exactly sexy.

  When the lights dimmed, I immediately tensed in my seat. Dan glanced over at me, excitement flashing in his eyes. “You ready for this?”

  “Ready as I’ll ever be,” I said honestly and forced a smile.

  “Here,” Dan said and held out his hand. “You can squeeze my hand whenever you get scared, okay?”