Kiss & Sell

by Brittany Geragotelis

  I prayed that she wouldn’t say anything to embarrass me as I retrieved the tiny clutch off my dresser and took one last look at myself in the mirror. Every hair was in place, my makeup was impeccable and the dress looked even better on me than it had at the mall. But it still wasn’t enough to calm my nerves.

  I took my time walking down the stairs, partly for dramatic affect—I was hoping that Ryder would do that mouth-hanging-open, forget-to-breathe thing people sometimes did on TV—but also because I was secretly afraid of tripping over my three inch heels and tumbling all the way down to the bottom of the stairs, effectively breaking my neck before the date even started. So, I put one foot in front of the other and kept my focus on where I was stepping until I’d reached the bottom.

  Only then did I dare look up at my date.

  I was happy to see that I’d elicited the desired reaction from Ryder and flashed him a shy, but broad, smile. I almost swooned as I took in the sight of him standing just inside my living room, looking more like he belonged on the red carpet than at a small-town high school dance. His tux was a classic black style and fit him like a glove. In a glance, you could tell that it was made for him and not one that he rented from a local formal clothing shop like the other guys in my school would be doing. He looked sharp in a black skinny tie, which hung loosely around his neck in a slightly disheveled way.

  But what made the outfit was his dress shirt, which was a bold, dark pink.

  He caught me staring at his shirt and began to smooth out the material nervously. “I remembered that you said you were wearing pink,” he explained. “Isn’t this what people do for dances? They compliment the girl’s dress? Or is that lame and I’m going to make us the laughing stock of your school?”

  I put my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing. What he’d done was so sweet—and brave, because when the guys at school saw Ryder in a pink shirt, they were going to tease him mercilessly—that I actually wasn’t sure what to say. Up until a few months ago, guys hadn’t even realized I existed, so the fact that someone was taking my feelings into account for a change officially threw me off balance.

  And to my surprise, I liked it.

  “You look great,” I said sincerely, my cheeks turning a shade that probably resembled my dress.

  Ryder seemed relieved by this and immediately regained the confidence I was used to seeing him wear. Stepping forward, he handed me a purple box a little bit bigger than my fist, and urged me to open it.

  Oooh, presents!

  I opened the package and sucked in my breath at what was inside. Lying on a delicate satin pillow was the most elegant flower I’d ever seen. It was simple, white and had petals that were smooth and perfect. Its fragrance hit my senses like a sweet memory and I sighed with happiness.

  “It’s a Gardenia,” Ryder said proudly. He leaned forward and plucked the corsage from its box and placed it on my wrist. “My sister once told me that Gardenias smelled like ‘heaven on earth.’ she used to go crazy over them when she was in high school.”

  “I can see why,” I answered, bringing my wrist up to smell it again. “It’s better than perfume.”

  When I looked up from my flower arrangement, I saw that Ryder was standing there, staring at me. Oh, God. Was I supposed to have gotten him something, too? nobody had told me about this whole present exchange thing and now I was starting to look like the worst date ever. This was why you were supposed to get ready for dances with your friends…so they could make sure that you were prepared for Everything.

  I looked around frantically searching for something in the nearby vicinity that I could pass off as a present suitable for my Homecoming date. I was about to hand over either my mom’s iPod which was laying next to her purse or the framed picture of me at my eighth grade graduation party, when Mom cleared their throat behind me.

  “Arielle, here’s the boutonniere you asked me to get for Ryder,” she said, walking toward me with a small bag in her hand.

  I had no idea what a boutonniere was, but I was so grateful to have something to give to Ryder that I didn’t care if it turned out to be a fancy fanny pack. I took the bag from her and gingerly peeked inside.

  “I know you wanted a lily, but they were all out. I had to go with a classic,” she explained.

  I smiled as I reached inside and grabbed the fragrant pink rose and displayed it to the room. It was small, and barely had a stem, but it was pretty.

  Boys weren’t supposed to be into flowers anyway, so maybe Ryder wouldn’t care that he got a defected flower.

  Keeping the smile on my face, I held out the flower to him, unsure of how this sort of thing usually went.

  “Sweetie, it’ll be easier if you put it on him,” my mom interrupted. “Just make sure not to poke him with the pin as you secure it to his jacket.”

  I could tell Mom was saving me some serious embarrassment by discreetly explaining what I was supposed to do with the boutonniere.

  She is so getting cool mom points for this.

  I pulled the pin out of the stem of the flower, which I hadn’t noticed was even there until my mom had mentioned it, and walked slowly toward my date.

  “Be careful now,” Ryder warned softly. “It’s always been a big fear of mine to die at the hands of a needle-wielding crazy girl.”

  I tried to concentrate on pinning the flower to his lapel without drawing blood. It’s never a good idea to make a guy bleed on your first date.

  “Lucky for you, I’m not crazy, huh?”

  “I don’t know about that…”

  I stopped what I was doing to look up at him challengingly. “Do you Really think that’s a wise thing to say right now? I mean, hello? Girl with sharp object here. I hardly think you’re in a position to question anyone’s sanity.”

  Ryder abruptly zipped his lip and watched with amused curiosity as I finally secured the flower—without stabbing him, I might add. When I was finished, I took a step back and admired my work. And the guy who wore it.

  “Picture time!” my mom chimed in, reminding me that she was still in the room, witnessing our special moment.

  Embarrassment spread across my face and I looked over at her with questioning eyes.

  So much for the cool mom points.

  “We were just going to get pictures at the dance,” I said, attempting to keep my voice even. “Besides, I don’t think we have enough time. We’re supposed to be doing some stuff for the show before we go to the dance.”

  My mom’s face dropped.

  “Actually, Ms. Sawyer, we’d love to take a few pictures if you don’t mind,” Ryder piped up, looking at me and then back at my mom.

  He must’ve seen the confused look on my face, because he moved toward me and lowered his voice. “I think the station wants to tape the whole process. The entrance, the corsage, the pictures…they’re gonna want the whole deal. I told them I wanted to go in first. Alone. You know, so we could do this sans camera for a little privacy. But I think we’ll have to go back and do it again, for them, if that’s okay with you.”

  He looked at me hopefully and seemed to be slightly embarrassed at what he was asking me. I was guessing that for Ryder, the MTV crew was sort of like having parental units witnessing his first real high school experience. And no one Really wanted their folks around for that.

  “Yeah, sure. no problem!” I said enthusiastically to show him that he had no reason to feel self-conscious. As far as I was concerned, there was a huge difference between posing for your mom’s digital camera and smiling for a reality show taping.

  “You’re the best,” he answered, looking relieved.

  I watched as Ryder walked across the room, pressing buttons on his phone as he went. Assuming he was letting the crew know they were good to go, I turned and walked over to my mom.

  “Thanks for getting the booty-thing,” I said appreciatively. “How’d you know I’d need one?”

  “It’s that Jedi-mom-mind. I know all sorts of things. That’s what moms are for, you kn
ow.”

  I raised a skeptical brow.

  “Also, I was a teenager once, too. Which means I went to dances with hunky guys and gave away my fair share of boutonnieres.”

  “Is that what they called it back in the olden days?” I joked.

  She looked confused for a minute. When she finally realized what I was alluding to, her eyes grew wide and she shoved me lightly.

  “Arielle anne sawyer!”

  I held up my hands in defeat. “Kidding.”

  I was still laughing as the crew walked through our front door and began setting up lights and equipment around our living room. nothing could’ve prepared me for the sight of so much clutter in our house. I looked over at Mom, expecting to see the panic in her face because of all the people traipsing around. Instead, she was smiling warmly at the crew and asking if she could get anyone a drink.

  Shocked by her reaction, I made my way over to Ryder who was still texting on his phone. Once I reched him, he flipped his phone shut and turned his attention to me.

  “You sure you’re okay with this?”

  Was I ready to have my first Homecoming dance exploited by some crazy reality show?

  “Let’s get this show on the road,” I answered.

  “Okay people, let’s take it from the top of the stairs,” a crew member yelled out across the living room.

  “I’M SO SORRY about all of that,” Ryder apologized once we were inside the stretch limo that MTV had rented for us.

  After we’d finished filming at my house, and the crew had gotten the shots they needed for the show, Ryder and I had jumped into the car that was waiting outside, and headed to a restaurant two towns over for dinner before the dance. It was a good thing they’d gotten us a limo, because the cameras followed us inside and taped us as we made small talk and joked around.

  It was interesting being on this side of a reality show. I’d always been a fan of the programs in the past, mostly because I was dying to see what it was like to live a celebrity’s life. And I know everyone says it’s scripted or that reality TV isn’t really reality at all, but I didn’t buy it. What I was beginning to see is that it’s real—to a certain extent.

  Like, they’d have us start talking and if one of us said something that was funny, one of the producers would ask us to say it again to make sure they had it. Or if they felt like our conversation was getting a little stale, they’d “Suggest” topics for us to talk about. Some of these included celebrity breakdowns and comebacks, what we thought really went on at high school dances and whether the vampire thing was totally dead in its coffin.

  Now that we were finally in the car alone and on our way over to the school, we found ourselves falling into a comfortable banter. One that didn’t include any of the previously mentioned topics. Instead, our conversation turned to Ryder, his work and the many rumors that were flying around about him.

  “Did you really kiss your male co-star when you auditioned for A New Dawn?” I asked, unable to hide my desire for a little dirt. “I was looking for it on youtube, but couldn’t find it. Perez Hilton swears he’s seen it, though. So, what’s the real deal?”

  “You went all you-tubular on me?” Ryder teased. “If you must know, there was a lip-lock and it was between me and a co-star. But it wasn’t who you think it was.”

  “Who was it?” I practically shrieked with delight. “Come on, tell me. I promise I won’t say anything. I already kept this whole night a secret, which made my friends all pissed at me, by the way. I think I deserve something for keeping my lips zipped.”

  I crossed my arms and pouted jokingly, while giving him my best version of puppy dog eyes.

  “Aw, don’t look at me like that,” Ryder said, looking pained. “Fine. But it’s not in my nature to kiss and tell. Even if it was an acting thing.”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spill!”

  Ryder laughed and then looked around the empty limo dramatically before leaning over and whispering the name in my ear.

  “No freaking way!” I screeched, causing Ryder to throw his hands over his ears. My mouth dropped open as I tried to picture the scenario that was now in my head. “Was that….”

  “Awkward?” he finished for me. “A little, but that’s how it is when you’re doing kissing scenes. It’s just a job. And not nearly as romantic as it seems.”

  I shot him a disbelieving look. no way him and his co-star had stopped ca-noodling when the cameras had been put away. The scene was practically famous among people my age and even earned “Best Kiss” at the MTV Movie awards. Even I wasn’t stupid enough to think you could put on a performance like that and not enjoy it just a little bit.

  I totally loved Ryder, but even he wasn’t that good of an actor.

  “Seriously,” he insisted. “When you’re shooting stuff like that, it’s really clinical. You’re given directions on where to put your head, how soft or hard to kiss, and when to hit your marks. You’re concentrating so much on everything you have to do, that you forget you’re even kissing someone in the first place. It’s not as fun as people think it is.”

  “And what about you? What happens if someone buys your first kiss, and you think he’s kind of cool and cute—but you aren’t really sure if you like him? if you go through with the kiss, wouldn’t you question whether you only did it because he paid for it? Or what it would’ve been like if it had happened organically? Do you really want your first kiss to be like a business transition?”

  Huh. When Ryder put it in those terms, he sort of had a point. Did I really want my first kiss to be with someone who happened to have saved up enough of his allowance to buy my affections, instead of because he liked me?

  But the alternative was that I might never be kissed if I didn’t go through with it. And if I had to go through the rest of the year watching everyone couple up but me, I might have to claw my eyes out or bite the bullet and join a convent already.

  To be honest, I wasn’t sure which would be more painful.

  “Saved by the bell, I guess,” he said, interrupting my thoughts. Ryder was pointing outside the car, and I turned to see that we’d arrived at the school. The limo slowed to a stop about 100 feet from the gymnasium and I watched as my peers passed by in their dressiest duds. A group of kids chatted excitedly, making jokes and fooling around as they walked toward the front doors. I felt a pang of sadness and guilt as they stopped to take a group picture, capturing the moment with their phones.

  I suddenly realized how much I wished McCartney and Phin were there. If we’d shared a limo like we’d planned, we could’ve taken silly photos and giggled as we whispered secrets about how cute our dates were. But instead, they’d gone on without me, and my night hadn’t been the same without them.

  No wonder I haven’t been kissed yet. I’m sitting here in this ginormous car with a date who’s more famous than Kim Kardashian’s booty, and all I can think about is how I wished I wasn’t alone with him.

  “You okay?” Ryder asked, picking up on my silence.

  I forced a smile. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just wondering if my friends are inside.”

  Ryder looked through the back window at the MTV van that had parked behind us. “All we’ve got left to do, is tape our pre-dance thoughts, and then we can find your friends and get our groove on,” he said, flashing me a dazzling smile.

  “Pre-dance thoughts?” I asked, confused.

  “Like a confessional. It’s where we talk to the camera about our expectations, what we’re feeling, that sort of thing. Then, we’ll do a wrap-up session after the dance and that’ll be it,” he said. “Don’t worry, the producers will prompt you with questions and you won’t have to answer anything you don’t want to.”

  “Okay,” I agreed uneasily. “Where do we do this?”

  “You stay here and I’ll do mine in the van,” he said. He hesitated before reaching out and placing his hand on mine softly. “You’ve been really great through this whole thing. I know how hard it can be the first time you have cameras in yo
ur face 24/7. I’m impressed. You’re handling it like a pro.”

  “Good to know all those episodes of the Kardashians are coming in handy,” I answered jokingly. Even as I laughed, I was very much aware of the fact that Ryder was still holding my hand. And I would’ve done just about anything he asked as long as it meant I got to hold onto him longer. “Now I know how the celebs feel.”

  “You have no idea.”

  Ryder squeezed my hand and exited the limo with a lingering backward glance, leaving me with a tingly feeling inside. But before I could enjoy the feeling, a producer appeared at the door and motioned for a camera to be set up inside. Once again, the bright lights were directed at me and I put on my game face.

  “Okay, Arielle, why don’t you start by telling us how the night has been so far,” the guy behind the camera said.

  “Um, well, everything’s been great. Dinner was really nice and it’s been so much fun getting to know Ryder better. He’s a really nice guy and easy to talk to. And this limo is…well, it’s bigger than my room!”

  “That’s great. now, why don’t you talk a little about what you’re looking forward to tonight.”

  “Let’s see. I guess, just hanging out with my friends. You haven’t met them yet, but they’re really great. McCartney and Phin, those are their names. McCartney’s going with this guy, Zack? He’s a soccer player and I think she really likes him, even though she plays it off like it’s no big deal. And Phin’s going with,” I paused as I searched my brain for the info. “Actually, I’m not sure who he decided to go with. But it doesn’t even matter who he takes, he’ll be so goofy that he’ll be our comic relief for the night.”

  I couldn’t seem to stop my rambling, so I just continued, unloading everything I’d wanted to talk to my friends about all week. Before long, I’d even forgotten that everything was being caught on film.

  “You know, originally I was supposed to share one of these,” I motioned around the cabin. “We had it all planned out and everything, but then I had to back out because…well, because you guys were going to be taping everything, and I had to sign that paper saying I wouldn’t tell anyone, and you made it clear that I couldn’t even tell my two best friends. To be honest, they’re kind of a little ticked at me right now, on account of the broken plans and all. So, I guess I’m just hoping they’ll overlook everything and that we can all still have fun tonight. I want our threesome back. They’re the best friends I’ve ever had and nothing’s worth losing them.”