Shadow Shifters: Damaged Hearts, The Complete Series: Mine to Claim, Part of Me, and Hunger for You

by A. C. Arthur

  The cat, the jaguar, that lingered just beneath the surface of my skin had made it known that she was the one, she was our other half, our companheiro. As if that had not been confirmation enough, her scent had sealed the deal. As it permeated through my body last night, the cat inside had purred, writhing in pleasure in the obvious connection. It didn’t seem to care that she was a human and not a Shadow Shifter. I, on the other hand, had to care about that. I had to care that the laws of the Ètica dictated that no Shadow Shifter should expose him- or herself to a human, that we should remain separate and apart from this species, while living right beneath their noses.

  It was a ridiculous law, but binding nonetheless even though we’d long since migrated from our home in the Gungi Rainforest in Brazil. We were still bound by them. Shackled and held captive by them was more like it. This was why we were trained so efficiently, why we studied so long and so hard before being allowed to live freely around the world. We had to learn how to blend in seamlessly, to look and act like a human, knowing full well we would never be like them. It was for their protection, we were taught. They needed us here to protect them from the ones like us that had their own rules and agendas. It was such bullshit I wanted to punch something. I wanted to yell at how stupid and unfair the entire setup was. But what would that prove, who would it help?

  Instead, I grit my teeth and kicked up my bike’s engine. I knew what I had to do, and no matter how much I detested the idea. I knew there was no other choice.

  About fifteen minutes later I rode around my apartment building. I’d pulled my helmet down so that my face couldn’t be seen. Nothing of me could be seen actually, as my jacket reached all the way down to the gloves I’d slipped on my hands. My pants hung over my boots and the chill in the air had prompted me to slip on a turtleneck when I’d awakened beside Grace.

  Grace.

  No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get her out of my mind. I wanted nothing more than to stay in that warm bed, entwined in her, listening to her breathe, smelling the sweet scent of her hair. Yes, my body had remained hard for her all night, yet there had been something more than physical reaction. There had always been something more.

  After the third ride around the block and not seeing any police cars I opted for a more subtle encounter. The officers could already be inside or on their way out after checking the place again. I didn’t really know and a part of me didn’t give a damn. I knew I could handle those officers if need be, I was a trained killer after all.

  Still, I drove around to the back parking lot, riding my bike right through the cement parking space blockers into the grassy area just beyond. About ten feet farther back was a line of trees. It wasn’t a dense forested area, just a patch of wooded land that the apartment construction apparently hadn’t needed to mow down. I came back here sometimes when I needed to think, to feel just a little of what I’d left behind. There were bigger areas like the national parks, which were a couple hours away, where I would go to run, to stretch, and let my cat be free. But when I needed a quick fix, a second to simply be who and what I was born to be, I came here.

  Cutting the engine, I parked my bike in the deepest part of the brush, pulling off my helmet and inhaling deeply. Then I walked back to the edge of the trees, sat down, and waited for night to fall, for the cover of darkness to assist what would be my last act in this place.

  While I waited I thought of Grace, of what might have been and my chest ached. My temples throbbed, nostrils flared, and I roared, loud and long, sharp teeth pricking my lips. She was mine, I knew without a doubt, mine to love, to claim, to mate. And I couldn’t have her.

  Whoever made the popular revelation that love sucked, must have had a snapshot of my life.

  * * *

  Hours later my muscles ached from sitting in the same spot for so long. But I hadn’t moved, had barely blinked. The cat inside had dictated it be so, as if we were waiting on prey. It was a little past nine now and I moved slowly, the collar of my jacket pulled up high around my neck. Leaving the helmet behind, I’d slipped on my shades and headed across the parking lot. Most of the tenants in the building were students and as finals had already begun they were either inside studying or at someone else’s house studying. Still I walked fast until I came to the maintenance entrance. The door was locked, of course. I gripped the knob and pulled. The door wrenched open easily enough and I slipped inside, pulling the broken door closed behind me.

  I took the stairs slowly, quietly, more than familiar with these hallways. When I arrived on the fourth floor I slipped through that door until I was standing just beneath the EXIT sign at the end of the hallway. My apartment was about twenty feet down. With a deep breath I moved forward, vowing to put down anybody who happened to be in there when I arrived. My patience was wearing thin despite everything I’d learned.

  Once inside my cat immediately began to hiss. Shadow Shifters had nocturnal vision, their eyes easily adapting to light and dark, whether in human or cat form. Right now my cat was so close to the surface I could feel the muscles in my shoulders bunching in preparation of a shift. With practiced restraint I kept it at bay, even though the state of my apartment was pissing even the human part of me off to no end.

  Everything I owned was either sliced to pieces or smashed. My feet crunched on broken glass and there was a faint scent of gasoline, or what I thought was gasoline. I moved slowly, not touching a thing but seeing everything. I went from the bathroom to the bedroom, back into the living room and into the kitchen. Then I stood at the window where I’d looked out a couple of nights ago and watched Grace climb into her friend’s car, leaving me again. My fists clenched at my sides both at that thought and the new scent I’d picked up.

  I was just about to do something I knew I’d probably regret, just let the first loud hiss of the cat be released inside the building when at my hip my cell phone vibrated.

  Yanking it from its clip so hard I thought I might actually break it, I answered. “Yeah?”

  “Where are you?”

  “I came back to pack my stuff,” was my response and it was mostly true.

  “You need to get out of there now. No bullshitting this time,” the deep male voice insisted.

  “What’s happened?” I asked because I knew there was more. I sensed it, I scented it, and I was almost anticipating it.

  There was a slight hesitation, then the candid nature of the Faction Leader pushed through. “Xavier came across some transmissions. The police are running your name and your school records through the FBI database. They’re trying to track you and whoever knows you down.”

  “For some half-assed gas station robbery that I didn’t even commit?” I asked incredulously. When Rome had first told me about the warrant for my arrest I’d laughed it off. I wasn’t anywhere near that gas station that night. In fact, I’d stayed right here in my apartment the entire time, not wanting to even go to the bar to have a drink after the episode with Grace.

  Of course that alibi sucked big monkey balls, hence the reason I’d chosen to run instead.

  “They found your bracelet at the scene,” Rome continued.

  I lifted my right arm, pushing back the jacket sleeve and cursed. It was gone. Topètenia males received a leather bracelet with the Topètenia insignia branded along its length, after their first completed shift which was usually around the age of sixteen. Once they completed their full training and passed the final trials, the insignia was tattooed on them to signify their lifelong loyalty to the tribe and everything it believed in. The trials were to take place this spring and I, along with my brothers Brayden and Caleb, were to receive our tattoos together—as we’d always planned. Or rather, as had always been planned for us.

  “I was in a fight that night, it must have fallen off then. I didn’t even notice it was gone,” I admitted reluctantly before a fluent line of curses came over the line.

  “I’m coming to get you,” Rome said solemnly.

  I shook my head. “No. I’ll l
eave tonight and come to you.”

  Because there was nothing else for me here, nothing but more mistakes, more disgrace to my family and my tribe. Try as I might to take a stand, it had never been my intention to disgrace the Shadow Shifters. I’d only wanted the freedom to live my life the way I wanted, not have it dictated to me through ancient scrolls and traditions. I should have known better, should have been stronger, more mature about the matter.

  All that had gotten me was almost captured by the police. A Shadow Shifter in captivity was not a pretty sight, it was a prelude to exposure and I could not allow that to happen.

  “I’ll be there in a couple of hours.”

  “I’ll be waiting,” Rome said before disconnecting.

  CHAPTER 9

  Aidan

  I was going to leave, had every intention of getting on my bike and riding right out of this backward judgmental town forever. But I couldn’t. Not without seeing her again.

  Everything inside me was close to exploding. My fingers hurt as I tried to grip the handles of the bike. Lowering my head as I sat there, I tried to breathe my way through the internal turmoil, but it wasn’t working this time. My temples didn’t throb any longer, they vibrated until I felt like my head must surely be disfigured by now. My teeth ached, my chest heaved, and my entire body shook. I climbed off the bike, placing it on its side as gingerly as my shaking hands could manage.

  When my knees buckled, my face coming closer to the ground, I knew it was pointless. It would no longer be contained and I no longer had the strength to try. I did, however, have the good sense to strip off my boots and clothes before the shift happened.

  It happened the way it always did, in a blur of cracking bones and tensing muscles. The difference this time was that the cat was ready to pounce. It was hungry and in pain, a dangerous combination to any human, deadly to a jaguar shifter. With a shiver, black fur covered the length of the cat, its tail adding another two feet to its total adult size. Brown rosettes spread throughout the rich coat but were hidden in the darkness as its mouth opened in a wide yawn, tongue extending about two seconds before it took off into the night.

  It ran long and hard, keeping cover behind buildings in the darkest shadows, moving with strength and agility throughout the night streets of Victory until it reached its destination.

  Across the street from Marsden Hall was lush grassland that would be covered with a light frost by dawn, the temperatures had dropped so significantly. There were picturesque trees with thankfully large trunks that hid the cat perfectly. It settled behind one, resting on its haunches as it looked up to a particular window, waiting for a glimpse of its companheiro.

  It didn’t have long to wait as about fifteen minutes later the front door to the dorm swung open and she came running through, pulling her jacket around her shoulders, wearing nothing but pajama pants and a tank top.

  Her unbound breasts were delectable, pert nipples peeking through the cotton of her top. Her feet were bare except for some sort of flip-flop. Her hair was mussed, lips slightly parted. The cat’s flanks heaved, desire coursing through its animal body, the human inside aching to get closer, to reach out and touch Grace one more time.

  She stopped then and seemed to look directly at the cat. It hunched back farther into the shadows, but Grace continued forward. She took each step slowly, purposefully, staring in its direction like she knew he was there, knew it was there, for her.

  Before either could react a car pulled up, screeching to a halt just as Grace was about to step from the curb. She jerked back and the driver’s side and passenger’s side doors opened, people jumping out quickly.

  The scent I’d picked up earlier in my apartment moved through the air and the cat hissed. It kept back, but it was ready to strike. It couldn’t be, I thought dismally. They couldn’t be.

  * * *

  Grace

  It seemed like forever even though I knew it had only been twelve hours since I’d seen or heard from Aidan. We hadn’t made plans to meet up but I’d thought after last night, the idea of us spending more time together was a given.

  I’d looked up the words he’d said last night, well, some of them since it took a few tries before I figured out they weren’t Spanish, but Portuguese. Anyway, he’d said “mate,” which seemed a little primitive and not necessarily what would have immediately come to my mind when thinking of a relationship. Still, the word gave me hope for a future. When he’d dropped me off he’d held me against his side, remaining steady on his bike as he touched his forehead to mine once again. He did that a lot and I wondered what was going through his mind at those times. Of course, I’d stood there like an idiot, my arms wrapped around him, waiting patiently for something, anything. That “anything” came in the form of the slowest sweetest kiss I could have ever imagined. And now, twelve hours later, I was craving more.

  I’d held off until a little after noon to try calling him and after receiving no answer twice, I’d switched to texting. I was ashamed at how many texts I’d sent and refused to let the number replay itself in my mind. To say that now, at a little before nine o’clock at night that I was worried about him, would be a serious understatement. I was more than worried but afraid to call the police precinct to see if they had him in custody for fear they’d show up at my door looking for him or some clues as to where he might be.

  Scarlett and I still weren’t speaking. She hadn’t even asked where I was last night, which kind of shocked me since all the time that I’d been in Victory Scarlett had sort of been like my big sister. Guess she figured why keep tabs on me if I wasn’t going to heed her advice—and for the record, I wasn’t. Staying away from Aidan was not an option, unless the stay away order came from him. Then I’d have no choice but to slink my mildly clingy self into a corner and lick my wounds alone. But until that moment …

  My cell phone vibrating on the bed jerked me from that thought and I tripped over the chair at the desk trying to hurry and get from where I’d been standing at the window to the phone. When I finally picked it up, I didn’t even check to see who was calling, just pushed the talk button and said, “Hello?”

  I’d almost said his name and luckily had caught myself before making that huge mistake.

  “Grace?” My mother’s shrill voice sounded through the phone. I hadn’t spoken to her in weeks, since the last time she called to see why the balance on that credit card and checking account still remained the same. She probably wanted to ask me the same asinine question, even though I’d told her in no uncertain terms the last time that I didn’t plan to use any of her money.

  “Hi, Mother,” I replied finally, dropping onto the bed with all the disappointment I felt tearing through my chest.

  “Why are you so out of breath? Were you running? You shouldn’t do that, you might fall and hurt yourself,” Sylvie Kincaid chided her only child.

  “I wasn’t running, Mother, and if I was I think I’m old enough to not fall on my face.” Now, that could only be partially true since just two nights ago I’d almost fallen in Aidan’s apartment—or rather I had stumbled and he’d caught me. That had turned out rather nice but I didn’t think my mother would want to hear that.

  “Well, the last thing I need is doctor’s bills and to have to come all the way across the country to see about you.”

  Because that would be way too much work for the precious Sylvie to endure. My mother was a professional stay-at-home mom, which would have been just fine if she’d ever done any of the “mom” things she was supposed to. I never understood the reason why she stayed at home if Eunice, the nanny, spent more time with me than any other adult in that big old house. For all the effort it took for her to boss around the cleaning staff and the cooking staff and on the rare occasions she even bothered herself with her child, Sylvie could have gotten a corporate job and used that degree in marketing she’d obtained. But no, Fred Ashburton Kincaid would not have his wife in the working world. As far as he was concerned he was the one and only provider
for his family. Unfortunately, the only thing he actually provided was money.

  “You don’t have to come see about me. I’m fine,” I said even though I was anything but.

  I pounded my fist into one of my pillows to keep from groaning at that thought. What if Aidan was in jail? What if he was going to get some serious time for a crime he didn’t commit? And how did I know he really didn’t commit the crime? I’d been doing this all day too, going back and forth about Aidan’s innocence and my possibly biased opinion of him.

  “Your father and I will expect you for the winter break. We can work on your transfer to Smith then. You may miss the spring semester but you can take summer courses to catch up. I told your father not to worry, that we would work everything out. He’s been so out of sorts since you derailed the college plans he had for you. But there’s still time for us to get back on track.”

  “What?” I asked when I’d finally decided to tune back in to her conversation. “What are you talking about? I’m not transferring schools,” I said vehemently.

  “Haven’t I been patient with you, Grace? Didn’t I allow you this bit of space to get over the little disagreement you and your friends had last year? Really, you should be thankful that I was able to keep your father from coming out there to drag you back kicking and screaming.”

  Oh, if she thought kicking and screaming was the most of what I’d do if either of them showed up on this campus with the thought of dragging me back, she had absolutely no idea who she was dealing with. Actually, she and my father had never had a clue about the person I really was. All they ever saw was the child they wanted me to be, the pawn in this elaborate game of life they played.

  “I am not going to Smith or to any other college you or Dad have selected for me. I’m happy where I am, Mom, which is a lot better than what I ever felt in Seattle. And that ‘little disagreement’ you’re referring to, it was sexual assault and if I wasn’t such a coward back then I would have pressed charges and watched Rory go to jail.”