Clothesline

by Amanda Anderson

  “It will get better.” She heard him say from behind her and his warm hands ran up her arms.

  “I just want you better.” She turned and pressed close. He was so thin, but he was on his feet and that was costing him.

  “I will be. I swear it.”

  12

  Clothesline felt like shit. He was tired of being in bed and he was tired of everyone looking at him like he was a freak and he was tired of feeling like he didn’t know his own body.

  He shoved to his feet and gritted his teeth against the pain in his body and the dizziness that made his stomach lurch. He was damned tired of being told what to do and what to eat.

  It was time he got back to living and damn anyone who had a problem with it.

  He smelled Pie before he saw him and let out a string of curses.

  “What the hell are you doing in my house and where the fuck is Harmony?” He said in place of the normal pleasantries civilized people employed.

  “Good morning pussycat.” Pie said over the paper he was reading.

  Line hissed before he could stop himself and that alone made him even more pissed off.

  “Fuck you Pie. get the hell out of my house.” He roared

  “Can’t do it. River wants someone here to play nurse maid and make sure you don’t go apeshit. I volunteered.”

  “Of course, you did.” Line limped to the kitchen and jerked open the refrigerator. His mood lightened slightly at finding it stocked.

  He pulled out a half-eaten roast and crammed it in the microwave.

  “Where is Harmony?” He snarled.

  “Safe.” Pie grinned.

  “Safe where?” Line gripped the counter to keep from leaping at Pie and beating the shit out of him.

  “She’s at Lost Lakes. She’s safe there. It’s where you need to be, at least until you’re healed. Whatever they gave you screwed with your healing. The little lioness you rescued said lions don’t heal as fast as we do. So, you are fucked.”

  Line gripped his hips, finding them bony and bare since he’d neglected getting dressed before searching for food.

  He looked over to where Pie sat. his brother’s eyes were on the paper, but Line could feel his worry.

  “There’s more.” Line knew it.

  “You changed. Your lion is fucked up, we thought you’d kill your own mate. River sent her away to save her.” Pie ran his hands over his head.

  “There’s alot. The woman, lioness, said they will want you dead now, but will probably wait and see if you can breed so they can get your weird ass kid to study.”

  “Why are you here?” Line sighed.

  Pie slammed the paper down on the table.

  “Because you are my fucking brother, my friend and this shit has been rough, ok? Is that what you wanted to hear? Do you like knowing how I blame myself for not watching you? I could have helped. Why the fuck didn’t you trust me to help you?”

  Anger. It was written all over Pie, but there was more, shame, guilt, fear.

  “I don’t blame you for it.” Line exhaled the words. He didn’t, hadn’t even thought about it really.

  “I blame myself.” Pie said quietly.

  “Don’t.”

  “No. listen. If you never get your wolf back… I can’t live with that. I know it will cause me to snap. Right now, River is telling me you are fine, and your wolf is fine and all that shit, but I… I … I want to know. The truth. I can’t even smell him. All I smell is fucking lion and that’s fucked up.”

  Right then Clothesline felt very vulnerable. He walked into his room and tugged on a pair of old sweats. When he came back Pie had the roast on a plate and a tall glass of water sitting beside it on the table.

  “I don’t know.” He said. “That’s the truth. I don’t know where my wolf is or if he is still even there. I can shift into the lion, but the wolf is out of reach. I have to live with that. So, do you.”

  Pie shook his head and looked heartbroken. “How can you live with it? How can you sit there like nothing has changed and just live with it?”

  “Harmony.”

  He breathed her name like a prayer. She was the tether that held him to the world. She was his reason to keep breathing.

  Pie nodded grimly.

  “A mate. She’s a good mate.” Pie said in a toneless voice. “A mate you cannot be trusted to be with alone. That is fucked up even for you.” His brows furrowed. “Maybe it’s the new thing around here.”

  “I will get this under control.” He said firmly “A mate gives strength. You will see.”

  Pie’s eyes shot to him. “I don’t have a mate. I never will.”

  There was insanity behind Pie’s eyes. He was losing himself and it broke Line’s heart.

  “Until then, you have us.” He said it with a force that he didn’t know he had.

  “We are a pack, a family. You hang onto that.”

  “You don’t understand. I should have fucking stopped you.” Pie said.

  Line saw shadows pass over Pies eyes.

  “I didn’t want you with me. I wanted to do it alone. I have to live with this and so do you. I am still me. Do you hate me now that you know what I am? Is our bond that weak? Can I not trust you now?”

  Pie was shaking his head, but not in disagreement, he was shaking it hard as if to shake something loose.

  “I was balls deep. I knew you were ditching me, but I wanted that fuck more than I wanted to watch you kill a bunch of assholes. You are my brother. You are my family. I let you down and you suffered through hell, because I wanted pussy more. I can’t just live with that shit.”

  His eyes were flickering, he was fighting a change.

  “Get the fuck out of my house before you change.” Line insisted, but Pie wasn’t listening.

  Line threw open the back door and hauled Pie outside.

  “Get a grip man.” He said, but Pie’s eyes had shifted, and he was sweating.

  “Fuck.” Line cursed as Pie’s wolf burst from his body to stalk him.

  Line forced a change and it hurt. His massive lion ripped free and let out a roar that sent the birds from the trees. Pie didn’t stop.

  He leaped on Line’s golden back and bit down fiercely.

  Line fought him, but he was careful not to kill him.

  Line was present in his own head when the lion took control, but he didn’t have to restrain the beast. It was like the animal treasured Pie as much as Line did in human form.

  He refused to hurt him.

  Pie didn’t suffer with such sentiment. He ripped into Line again and again, but Line’s mind was churning. Pie wasn’t going for death blows, he was just trying to piss off the lion.

  I have always been here

  The words ran over his thoughts like butterfly wings.

  Line had been afraid of the lion, of what it would become, but it was telling him, showing him that it was part of him.

  He didn’t get to examine the thought for long. Pie tore into him again and again.

  They fought for what seemed like hours. Line’s body was shaking. He was still too weak for the fight but knew his what game Pie was playing. He pushed himself.

  Blood poured from his body, saliva dripped from his fangs and he fought, always halting his blows before they struck a death blow.

  “Change back now.”

  The command rippled in the air making it hard to breathe. Pie screamed as his body shifted and he lay panting in the dirt. Line too felt the ripping pain of a forced change, but it was followed quickly by his lion taking him again. River’s command shook the earth.

  Power ripped through Clothesline and this time he emerged human, but from his lips came the howl of his wolf.

  “You have lost nothing brother.” River said and still his voice pulsed. “Wake wolf.”

  The wolf howled and Line felt him writhe in his middle. He screamed as fire ran through his blood, but he could not change, and his wolf was in agony.

  He felt the wolf fading again, retreating from the b
linding pain, but River stood over him and pushed him to stay, fight.

  Line panted in pain, but River wouldn’t let him up. He demanded the wolf fight.

  “That’s enough.” Pie gritted, but River wasn’t giving up.

  “Why? What the fuck do you care?” The look he shot Pie was one that spoke of rage.

  “It’s enough. He’s gone through enough.” Pie said again. “Leave him the fuck alone.”

  “Shut up.” River commanded. “You thought he could fight, but you don’t think this is ok? I’m saving him you idiot.”

  Another howl ripped from Line’s throat. He felt like he was being torn in two.

  “You have peace to make brother. Peace inside. You have to accept yourself, all of it. They have to accept each other.”

  With these words River stepped back and Line felt the pain ease. His wolf was still there, pacing in the deep shadows of him mind, but he was there.

  Pie carried him into the house and dumped him in the shower.

  “I don’t know what to say.” He started.

  “Then don’t. What the fuck was that shit?” Line hissed when the water ran over his torn skin.

  “We all have shit to work through.”

  Line looked up and saw the haunted look in his brother’s eyes.

  “It’s fine. I could have killed you twenty-six times. I counted. You need more practice.”

  Pie let out a humorless laugh. “Cool then, I’ll come back tomorrow, and you can teach me a lesson.”

  “You mean I can kick your ass again? I’ll mark it on my calendar.”

  “Yeah fuck you.” Pie turned to leave and a grin split his face. “Don’t forget to wash your pussy.”

  His laughter followed him out the door.

  Line leaned his head against the shower wall and let the water wash away the blood.

  “We are one fucked up pack of idiots.” He sighed, but he felt steadier and he had alot to think about.

  13

  Harmony’s hand shook as she read the letter that had been left for her in her favorite spot, where she watched the sun set each night.

  There is no place we will not find you.

  There is no escape.

  The paper slipped from her numb fingers and fluttered to the ground.

  It was proof.

  Proof that even in Lost Lakes, she was not safe. Clothesline couldn’t control this new animal inside him, he couldn’t trust it.

  She wanted to run, to hide, but there was no place for her to go. She was trapped, and she didn’t know who to turn to.

  “They want a child.” Came a deep voice.

  Harmony looked up to see Lucian Everly. He was the most feared shifter in the world and the most powerful. It was a battle, she knew, there were those with more money, but he was smart. He knew how to handle rivals and he knew how to gain loyalties.

  She looked up into his green eyes and knew he understood and he knew the answers.

  “What can I do?” Tears were thick in her throat, but she wouldn’t let them fall.

  “You keep it from them. You have time. You aren’t pregnant, and it isn’t known if you can even become so. Why worry over something so unknown?”

  His words seemed so simple.

  “I know, but how. If they can reach me here… I will never be safe.”

  “They are trying to scare you.” He said as if she were an idiot.

  “It’s working.” She whispered and his gaze jerked to her.

  “I thought you’d have more spirit. It’s disappointing.” He frowned and shook his head. “Your brother speaks so highly of you, of your courage.”

  “What am I supposed to do? They killed Line’s wolf and not even he trusts his lion. They want my baby and they can obviously get in here to taunt me. I’m human! I am one woman against who knows how many lions. I…”

  He held up a hand to stop her. “Are you finished feeling sorry for yourself? It’s tedious.”

  Her anger rose.

  “Feeling sorry for myself? Are you really this heartless? How can I…”

  “Please…” He held his hand up again. “Your mate is in pain, more pain than you can imagine. He has lost a part of himself, or thinks he has. He has something inside him that he hates and can’t control. He has a mate that could bring him peace, but she is hiding with the coyotes instead of comforting him.” He looked disgusted. “Because she is afraid.”

  “I… River sent me…” She let out a huff. “What am I supposed to do? I’m safe here.”

  “Obviously.” He waved his hand toward the letter.

  She was deflated. She had told herself she was safe, but the letter proved that she wasn’t. There was no place she was safe.

  “What should I do?”

  He studied her face.

  “You are stronger than you let yourself believe. You have lived through hell. You handled a man that was more insane than sane, that is the case with most of his kind by the way, he wasn’t remarkable in that. You did what you had to do to survive. You did what you had to do to protect your brother. You are still staying close to him and he no longer needs you to. So, tell me now, why are you acting like such a coward? Why can you not love your mate as much as your brother? Why do you now refuse to protect the one who needs you most?”

  She had no words. She’d protected Reed for so long, but Lucian was right, Reed no longer needed her. Line did.

  “Perhaps this will help.” He handed her a large manila envelope. “I will be heading to Wolf Pack in an hour. If you want to accompany me, meet me here and I will suffer your company for the trip.”

  He walked away from her.

  She opened the envelope to find pictures. They were of Line and she knew it the moment she saw his dark eyes. There were pictures of all stages of his life, some of a pink cheeked boy and some of a more awkward boy trying to be a man. There was a woman too, one that loved him, his aunt, she assumed. The scar appeared when he looked no older than seven and it broke her heart. The look in his eyes changed then, there was a terror there, a hardness that no child should have, but there was also strength.

  She pulled a single sheet of paper from the envelope.

  Subject: Zane Imari

  Sex: Male

  Species: Mixed Lion/wolf

  Mother : murdered by Jelani Pride

  Father: murdered by Jelani Pride

  Born: June 2, 1973

  “Zane.” she whispered and ran her finger over the picture of him as a young boy.

  Warmth filled her heart and she laughed. She had been such a fool. They were stronger together than apart, together they could face anything.

  She walked back to the house, feeling lighter than air. She climbed the stairs to her room and packed her few belongings. She would go to him and she would stand with him and she would never leave him again.

  They would face the hell that threatened them and they would do it together.

  14

  He smelled her.

  Her scent was everywhere, it was part of him, it filled his lungs.

  He wanted to scream.

  He was so damned weak, too weak for his mate to trust him and it tormented him even in sleep.

  But he wasn’t asleep.

  Line sat up in his bed.

  It was early. The sun was just turning the morning gray with light, but he knew something had changed. The new day had brought new promise and his heart leapt.

  Then he heard her, a laugh, quiet, but there and he heard her hum happily.

  He slowly climbed from is bed. She wasn’t alone, He smelled Lucian and River too, but she was there.

  He crept to the hall, so he could look into the kitchen and he caught his first sight of her since she’d left him. How long had it been?

  She opened the oven and looked inside. He smelled biscuits and heard the familiar sizzle of bacon in a pan.

  The loneliness that had surrounded him like a heavy coat, now fell away. She was home.

  She looked up and smiled when she ca
ught sight of him.

  “Good morning.” She said and her voice unstuck his feet. He rushed to her and pulled her into his arms.

  “Stay.” He breathed when he tore his lips from hers.

  “Always.” She whispered back. She cupped his face and looked into his eyes and repeated her words. “Always.”

  “It isn’t safe. I can’t trust myself.” He said brokenly.

  “That’s ok. I trust you.” She soothed.

  “My lion…”

  “Is a stranger and he’s scared, and he’s pissed off, but he’s still part of you. He’s still my mate. We just need to get to know him. We can do that. We can do it with help. You can’t hide who you are. You have to accept it. We need to learn to love him too.”

  How had he ever found someone so strong? How had he ever been able to find her?

  “I don’t know what to do.” He admitted and felt like a fool.

  “First, we stop hiding. I have agreed to let Lucian follow the pregnancy and he can study us, but it will be observing, our lives will not be taken from us. In return, we have his protection. With him and the strength of our pack, we will be ok. We can’t live in fear.”

  She was right.

  He held her close and lifted the walls he’d built in his mind. He let his lion feel her, her love, her warmth, and his throat vibrated.

  Harmony giggled.

  Line remembered all the other times his throat had vibrated when she’d been near and he shook his head.

  “Well, I’ll be damned.” He chuckled and shook his head.

  There was no violence in him. She was his mate, lion, man, or wolf, his world revolved around this woman.

  “It is my opinion that your wolf will come back, he’s asleep and who knows what that drug has done. Give him time. In that time, get to know your cat. He isn’t new to you, he has always been there. Your wolf cannot beat the Pride. You need your cat for that.” Lucian said smoothly.

  It was hope.

  “I need you back on the road Line. we still got shit to do.” River was his normal charming self.

  Line met his alpha’s eyes. They told him more than he even asked. He was accepted. He still had a place. He was still family.