Sunrise on Cedar Key

by Terri DuLong

  Aunt Maude remained silent for a few moments. “You may not want her, Grace, but you might come to see that you need her.”

  “Never,” I said, stomping off toward the bathroom. “And as a matter of fact, I’m taking a shower and I’m going to finally confront her. Once and for all. I’ll get this out in the open and that will be the end of it—and the end of having a sister.”

  An hour later I found myself stomping up my sister’s back stairs to her apartment. She didn’t seem surprised to see me when she opened the door. I had a feeling she’d received a call from Aunt Maude.

  “We need to talk,” I said, pushing past her into the living room. “And so,” I yelled, pacing her oak floorboards. “Perhaps you might tell me why—why—you saw fit to stick your nose into my private life ten years ago? Were you that miserable and jealous? How could you! How could you call Beau’s wife? You had no right to do that. None.” I only stopped long enough to catch a breath. “You’ve always been a bitch, Chloe, but even more than I ever realized. And where the hell did you see us anyway?”

  I forced myself to look across the room at my sister. It was easy to see that her anger level was matching mine.

  “Why? Because every wife has a right to know, that’s why. When I saw my sister coming out of a hotel in Jacksonville with a married man, I felt it was my duty to tell his wife.”

  I laughed. “Duty? No, it wasn’t your duty. You just wanted me to be as miserable as you were. But you didn’t succeed, because I’m not you and I never will be. I’m not a doormat like you always were for Parker. I took risks in my life—something you were always too fearful to do. I’ve made my own way without depending on a man to get me there. So what you did had nothing to do with duty.”

  The tears that flowed down my sister’s face matched my own.

  “You’re right,” she said, her voice rising. “Miss Perfect Gracie. Always right. That’s you. And yes—I wanted what you had. I always wanted that and never had it. Not ever.”

  There. She had said it—what I’d always felt but never admitted. And now, Chloe had confirmed it.

  “That’s because you had no clue how to go about getting it. None whatsoever! It was much easier for you to bitch and complain about what you didn’t have rather than putting forth the effort to get it yourself. You’re damn right I’m right—you’re consumed with jealousy for what I’ve accomplished. You haven’t changed at all, and I don’t ever want to see you again.”

  She didn’t try to stop me as I headed to the door and slammed it behind me.

  Over the next month I discovered that it wasn’t an easy task trying to avoid certain people in a town of only nine hundred residents.

  I had to plan my visits to the yarn shop when I knew Dora would be there rather than Chloe. I hadn’t returned to the coffee café and bookstore since Beau had showed up.

  I admit I felt pretty lonely most days, but I’d severed my ties with Chloe and the ball was in Lucas’s court. Which only left Suellen to commiserate with. I was grateful for the supper invitation she’d extended to me. I grabbed the bottle of Cabernet and my handbag.

  Annie looked up from the sofa. She’d been my constant companion through all the recent upheaval.

  “Be a good girl,” I told her. “I won’t be late, but mommy needs a little people company.”

  “Hey, come on in,” Suellen said, opening the door. “How’re ya doing?”

  “Fair to shitty would cover it.” I passed her the wine.

  “Thanks,” she said, heading to the kitchen for the corkscrew.

  She returned a minute later, two wineglasses in hand.

  “Here ya go, girlfriend. Better days ahead.”

  “Yeah, right,” I mumbled, and took a sip.

  We both curled up on the sofa.

  “Still no word from Lucas, huh?”

  I shook my head. “Nope. Maybe I’ll never hear from him again.”

  “Oh, Gracie. I seriously doubt that. He loves you. He really does.”

  I looked over at my oldest friend on the planet. “And you would know this how?”

  “I would know this because I am one of the biggest romantics in the world. We just know stuff like this. He’s just pissed. Give him time to cool off.”

  “Till when? When we’re in that nursing home together drooling?”

  Suellen laughed. “Glad to see you haven’t lost your sense of humor.”

  “That’s about all I have left.”

  Suellen took a sip of wine. “Well, you have to admit, Grace. I’m sure it was pretty surprising to him. He comes back from Brunswick a day early, is out walking his dog and finds you in the park necking with some other guy.”

  “Necking? Does anybody even use that term anymore? And we were not necking. Beau was simply giving me a good-bye hug.”

  “Yeah, but Lucas sure didn’t know that, did he? Just think what it must have looked like to him. And then think how you would have felt if you’d witnessed the same thing.”

  Suellen was right. Like always.

  “So ... things are really resolved between you and Beau?”

  “Yes. Totally. And it feels good. Like a weight has finally been lifted. It was sad, telling him about the baby, finding out that he truly did love me. But it also made me realize even more that what we shared wasn’t that forever kind of love.”

  “Like what you have with Lucas.”

  I didn’t answer. Because it hurt too much to think about it—and what I’d possibly lost.

  “Life can be a bitch, huh?” my friend said.

  I took a gulp of wine. “You think?”

  “And do I dare ask about Chloe?”

  “Hey, can you blame me for being pissed? My God, I still can hardly believe it was she who called Lila. It’s also crossed my mind how different my life may have been if she hadn’t interfered.”

  “Oh, don’t even go there. What-if’s get you nowhere. You know that. And no, I don’t blame you at all for being pissed at her. It was a really nasty thing to do. But ...”

  I sat up straighter on the sofa and turned to face Suellen. “But what?” I said, hearing the edge in my tone.

  “Well, I think you’re very right about the way Chloe was all those years. Hell, I knew her, too, don’t forget, and she was a bitch. Difficult. Demanding. Snooty. But I have to be honest here, Grace. I also think she did a one eighty when she moved here to the island. She was really sincere in wanting a relationship with you.”

  “So ... what? You’re saying I should just forgive her and everything will be honey and roses again? No. I’m afraid I can’t do that.” I finished off the last sip of wine. “Out of the question. I mean, come on, she finally came out and admitted the jealousy she’s always had for me. Saying that she wanted what I had.”

  Suellen was silent for a few moments. “Did ya ever think that was a compliment to you? She admired you. Yeah, she wished she could have what you did, but years ago she had no clue how to go about getting it. That doesn’t mean she’s a bad person, Gracie. Just like you and Beau weren’t bad people.”

  Damn. Why did Suellen have to make such logical sense?

  35

  When it reached six weeks since I’d heard from Lucas, I was convinced it was over. And I won’t lie, I was miserable without him in my life. I hadn’t even bumped into him anywhere on the island. Not once. I did think I caught a glimpse of him one morning when I was at the end of Second Street walking Annie, but it was only a glimpse.

  Since Chloe and Dora were now the official owners of Yarning Together, my sister worked there three days a week full-time. Therefore, she explained to Aunt Maude that she was going to back out of the knitting retreats. So this enabled me to partake of the gatherings once again, and I did wonder if Chloe had done this for that reason.

  I was up in my loft office working on bookings for upcoming retreats when I sensed a presence downstairs in the carriage house. I looked down to see Lucas standing in the doorway and felt my heart skip a beat. Damn, he was handsom
e. I saw his curly dark hair, his tanned skin, and I remembered the first time he’d walked into my coffee shop. Our eyes locked as he stared up at me.

  “Hi, Grace,” he said, as I stood up and made my way downstairs.

  I felt awkward and unsure of myself, but I walked toward him. “Hi, Lucas.”

  He shifted from one foot to the other, and I realized he was as nervous as I was.

  This is it, I thought. He’s come in person to let me know we’re finished.

  “I was wondering,” he said, clearing his voice. “I would ... ah ... like to cook dinner for you this evening. Is there any chance we could talk?”

  Beau had uttered those exact same words. And that had worked out well.

  “Over dinner,” he added.

  I felt like I was getting a reprieve. I felt giddy and like a teenager being asked out on her first date. And I felt a smile cross my face as I said, “Yes. Yes, I’d like that, Lucas.”

  His smile matched mine. “Good. Would six o’clock be okay?”

  “That would be great,” I said, as he turned to leave. “Oh, and Lucas ...” He paused to turn around. “Thank you.”

  That killer smile that I loved and had come to know so well covered his face.

  I showed up at Lucas’s door a few minutes before six and hoped my choice of black cropped pants, emerald green silk tank top, and black leather flip-flops would make me appealing in his eyes. I’d even added a spray or two of Magie Noire.

  Lucas opened the door with Duncan dancing in circles at his feet. I registered a quick look and knew he certainly appealed to my eyes before bending down to pat Duncan.

  “Come on in,” he said, gesturing toward the living room.

  Was it my imagination or did Lucas seem more reserved than usual?

  Two glasses of red wine along with a cheese platter were on the coffee table. Before I had a chance to say anything, Lucas passed one of the glasses to me.

  “Santé,” he said.

  I nodded and took a sip. “Very nice.”

  Lucas sat beside me on the sofa, and the close proximity of his body made me realize even more how much I’d missed him.

  “You’ve been well?” he asked as if having a conversation with one of his bookshop customers.

  “Yes, and you?” The formality between us was almost comical.

  “I have,” he said, placing his wineglass on the table to turn and face me. “But I’ve missed you, Grace. A lot.”

  My heart turned over. “I’ve missed you, too, Lucas.” I wasn’t sure what to say next.

  “But I’ve needed these weeks to think. I’ve had a lot of things to resolve in my mind.”

  When he didn’t go on, I questioned, “And have you resolved them?”

  “I think so, but there is a part of my life that I need to share with you. A part you know nothing about. And if we are to go forward together—you have to know.”

  The joy I’d been feeling since Lucas showed up earlier at the carriage house was now being replaced by fear. Was his wife not really dead? Was he still married? Did I not know this man at all?

  Lucas reached for my hand and let out a deep sigh.

  “I had told you that my wife was killed in an automobile accident. . .”

  I held my breath and nodded.

  “Yes, that is true.” He looked down at our clasped hands, and then his deep brown eyes focused on mine. “What I neglected to tell you ... is that my daughter was also killed in that accident.”

  A wave of dizziness and nausea hit me at the same time, and I felt myself gripping Lucas’s hand tighter. Daughter? Lucas had a daughter?

  “I know this is quite a surprise to you, and I understand if you’re upset because I never shared this with you. But ... it is very painful. Genevieve was six years old when I lost her—and she was the light of my life.”

  My God, I had no idea that Lucas had dealt with the tragic loss of a child. I gripped his other hand. “I’m so sorry. So terribly sorry.”

  He nodded in understanding. “Yes, it was difficult enough to lose Genevieve, but there’s more to the story, I’m afraid.” He took a deep breath and went on. “You see, when the accident occurred ... Danielle, my wife, she was on her way to meet her lover. She was leaving me—and taking our daughter with her.”

  Lucas was right—there was much more to his story that I had no knowledge of. He hadn’t been grieving the loss of a devoted and loving wife, as I’d been led to believe. It was the loss of his daughter that had torn his life apart.

  “Oh, dear God,” I said, feeling moisture fill my eyes. “Did you know? Did you know about her lover and that she was leaving you?”

  “I had suspicions about the lover but no proof, and no ... I had no idea that her plan was to leave, go to him, and take Genevieve.”

  Lucas released my hands, reached for his wineglass, and took a deep swallow. I did the same and waited.

  “I returned home to our apartment late that afternoon. The weather had been exceptionally bad. Heavy rain, high wind. I was surprised to find Danielle and Genevieve not home. When I walked into the kitchen I found Danielle’s note on the table. She told me she was very unhappy, had been for many years. She explained that she’d had a lover since the time Genevieve was three and the time had come to go to him permanently.”

  Lucas took another swallow of wine. “God help me, but my first thought was not for Danielle. In my heart, I had known for a long time that our marriage was over. As I stood there reading her note, it was Genevieve that my heart was breaking for. And within a few hours, the police called to tell me they were both dead. Danielle skidded on the wet highway just outside of Paris. Doing a high rate of speed—in her haste to be with that lover—and she took my daughter with her.”

  It was then that Lucas broke down, face in his hands, as his sobs filled the room.

  I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed such anguish in another person. I pulled Lucas to my chest, rocking back and forth as tears poured down my face. I felt his pain, his grief, his anger, and allowed all of it to connect with his.

  Sitting there, holding Lucas tightly in my arms, snippets of various incidents came into my mind—his reaction about me seeking out a sperm donor, his obvious fondness for Max but reluctance to have a child of his own, his hesitation in asking me out, his ability to trust. All of it was beginning to make more sense.

  “Seeing me with Beau brought back memories of an unfaithful wife, didn’t it?” I whispered.

  He nodded, leaned over, and touched his lips with mine before getting up and heading toward the bathroom.

  I took a sip of wine and realized at that very moment I was experiencing that same feeling of a weight being lifted as I had with Beau. I also realized that all along something deep inside of me knew there was more to Lucas Trudeau than he had chosen to share.

  When he returned to the living room, he was composed and had a hint of a smile on his face. Sitting beside me, he took both of my hands in his.

  “So ... now you have my story and you can see I’m not a perfect human being. But maybe now you have a better understanding of why I have acted in certain ways.”

  I smiled and leaned over to kiss him.

  “None of us are perfect, Lucas. Least of all, me. And yes, many things now make much more sense. I’m glad you told me about Genevieve. I love you, Lucas.” There, I’d finally said it. And I said it because I wanted to, not because I expected a return declaration. “I love you with my entire heart and soul, and I will always love you.”

  In that moment I saw all of the love I was feeling reflected in Lucas’s eyes. He squeezed my hands tighter as a serious expression crossed his face. “Grace, I’ve loved you from the first moment I laid eyes on you. I just had to be sure.”

  “I know that,” I told him. And I did.

  “I want to love you for the rest of our lives and spend all of our moments together.”

  I didn’t utter a word—scared that maybe I’d misunderstood him. And then I heard those words t
hat I realized I’d been longing to hear Lucas say.

  “Will you marry me?”

  As tears filled my eyes again, but this time from happiness, Lucas reached over to the drawer of the coffee table. He removed a small blue velvet box and looked into my eyes.

  “Will you be my wife?” he asked.

  I looked down at the most exquisite diamond ring I’d ever seen as tears continued to blur my vision.

  “This ring belonged to my grandmother,” he said. “And I would love for you to wear it.”

  “Yes. Oh, God, yes. I’ll marry you and I’ll wear the ring forever,” I told him, holding out my left hand as he slipped the ring onto my finger.

  I threw my arms around Lucas’s neck.

  “I love you, Grace,” I heard him say. “I love you with all that I am.”

  I pulled away to hold my hand out and catch the dazzling sparkle that winked back at me before Lucas took me into his arms and his lips met mine.

  Our love and desire rose to the surface as each kiss increased in passion.

  “I want you, Lucas,” I whispered in his ear. “I want you to make love to me.”

  “Are you sure?” he whispered back.

  I felt my desire rising and nodded. “I’m very sure.”

  Lucas stood up, looked down at me with a smile, and reached for my hand. As I walked with him to the bedroom, I knew without a doubt that love was the most powerful emotion of all.

  36

  When I awoke the next morning, I felt momentarily disoriented. I heard Lucas’s soft breathing beside me and smiled. Holding up my left hand, I felt my smile grow wider as all of the events from the night before came rushing back.

  Making love with Lucas was everything I knew it would be. Falling asleep in his arms was pure bliss.

  I shifted carefully so as not to wake him and stared at the handsome face of the man I had committed to marry. My heart constricted with sorrow as I recalled his loss of Genevieve, but I knew without a doubt that together we would always keep her memory alive.