P is for PERIL

by Sue Grafton

  I spoke loudly, hoping she could hear me through the glass. “I’m a friend of Fiona’s. She’s out and I need to use your phone.”

  I saw her eyes stray toward Fiona’s house while she assimilated the request. She made sure the burglar chain was secure, and then she opened the door a crack. I don’t remember now how I explained the situation, but I must have been persuasive because she let me in without argument and showed me to the phone.

  Seven minutes later, the first black-and-white patrol car had come careening up the road.

  Nearly two hours had passed and neighbors from many of the surrounding houses had straggled out to the road. They stood in clusters under the meager shelter of their umbrellas, conversing in subdued and fragmentary bursts while the rain pattered on. Word had apparently spread that the doctor’s car had been found. Under ordinary circumstances, they probably didn’t have much occasion to meet. None of the houses up here was built close together and with many residents holding day jobs, my guess was their paths seldom crossed. A rag-tag crew, they looked like they’d pulled on their coats and their rain boots in haste. They waited with patience, their vigil ritualistic, a community of the concerned conferring at this unprecedented gathering. A temporary fence of plastic pylons and tape prevented their approach. Not that there was much to see from where they stood. Looking toward the city, the roadway itself was cloaked in darkness, no streetlights within range. In the opposite direction, the asphalt petered out. Beyond the last cul-de-sac, there were only black and looming foothills, raw land knit together with sage and chaparral.

  I sat in my car, feeling tense with the cold. At intervals, I fired up the engine so I could keep the heater running and the windshield wipers on, though the steady thunk-thunk-thunk-thunk nearly put me to sleep. To my right, the hill rose at a thirty-degree angle for a hundred yards or so before it crested and curved down to the lake. From the water’s edge, the floodlights glowed eerily, silhouetting the few scrub trees stretched out along the crest. At intervals, the light was broken by shadows as the police went about their business. I’d spoken briefly with Odessa when he’d first reached the scene. He’d asked me to stay and said they were putting a diver in the water to check the car’s interior before they hauled it out of the lake. He’d set off up the long slope and I settled in for the wait.

  At some point, Leila had appeared, accompanied by her stepfather, Lloyd, who’d come home while I was in the process of discovering Dow’s car. They stood to one side under a black umbrella, maintaining a distance from the neighbors. I was guessing the two had been attracted by the lights and had hopped in Lloyd’s car. For once, Leila seemed to be experiencing an emotion other than boredom or contempt. With her thick black mascara and heavily shadowed lids, she looked like a waif, big-eyed and solemn, shivering uncontrollably. I knew I should go over and introduce myself to Lloyd, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Down the road, I spotted two minicam crews, one from KWST-TV, the other from KEST-TV. The blond reporter from KEST was already picking up film clips and interviews for the eleven o’clock news. She stood under a big black umbrella, talking to one of the neighbors. I didn’t see any other reporters, but they were doubtless around somewhere.

  I adjusted my rearview mirror and watched as a pair of headlights swept into view around the curve in the road. I was hoping to see Fiona, but the vehicle turned out to be Crystal’s white Volvo. She slowed as she approached. She waited while a smattering of people ambled out of the roadway and passed in front of her, and then pulled in and parked on the berm just ahead of me.

  I grabbed my slicker from the backseat and held it over my head as I left the comfort of my VW and moved gingerly along the road to her car. She turned and caught sight of me and rolled down her window. Her face was drawn, her hair pulled back in an untidy knot at the nape of her neck. Gone were the black slacks and sweater she’d worn earlier. She looked like she’d dressed in haste, pulling on jeans and a gray utilitarian sweatshirt bearing the name of our gym. She said, “I was already in my robe and slippers when the officer came to the door. He wanted to bring me over in his patrol car, but I wanted my own wheels. What’s happening?”

  “Nothing much. This is worse than a movie set, with all the people standing around. Where’s Anica?”

  “She had to get back to school. Hop in.”

  I said, “Thanks.” I opened the door and slid into the front seat. Behind me, Griffith’s car seat was buckled into place, the surrounding area decorated with an assortment of cookie crumbs and broken pretzels. A plastic baby bottle filled with apple juice had left a sticky residue in the spot where I rested my hand. There was a pink plush squirrel on the floor by my feet. I pictured him flinging his binky, his bottle, his snacks, and stuffed animals, a hurricane of objects announcing his presence. The interior air smelled of flowers and spice, Crystal’s cologne.

  I said, “How are you?”

  “Numb.”

  I said, apropos of nothing, “The car might have been abandoned.”

  “Let’s hope that’s all it is.” She angled the rearview mirror in her direction and ran a knuckle under her lower lashes where her eyeliner had smeared. She pushed the mirror back and slouched down on her spine. She leaned her head back on the seat and closed her eyes. In profile, I could see the irregularities of her features. Her nose was too sharp, her lower jaw too narrow for the width of her brow. Properly done up, she seemed more intimidating than she was in the moment. “When did you get here?” she asked, as though talking in her sleep.

  “Hours ago. At six.”

  “They said not to hurry. I was watching TV when the officer arrived at the door.”

  “You’re lucky. I’m starving. I missed dinner. I’m about to eat my arm.”

  Crystal reached over to the glove compartment and flipped the door down. “Try this.” She removed a battered Hershey’s bar and passed it over to me. “How’d they find the car?”

  “I was the one who spotted it and called 9-1-1. The cops are over there now doing god knows what.” I removed the outer wrapper and opened the white inner paper liner. The scent of chocolate rose like a vapor. I broke the candy bar into perfect sections and placed one on my tongue. I could almost read the engraved letter H as I pressed one softening chocolate square against the roof of my mouth.

  “How’d you know the car was his?”

  “The vanity license plate.”

  We were silent. Crystal turned on the radio and then thought better of it and turned it off again. The rain on the roof was a soft percussion, a drummer’s brushes on cymbals. The atmosphere was oddly intimate. We were both out of our natural habitats, constrained by the unfamiliar setting, bound by the wait. “I take it they haven’t pulled the car out of the water yet,” she said at length.

  “They’re waiting for the tow truck. Odessa said he’d let us know as soon as there’s something to report.” I ate an E and stuck the rest of the Hershey’s in my shoulder bag. I crossed my arms in a vain attempt to get warm.

  Crystal made a sound that was half sigh and half something else: tension, impatience, simple weariness. “I knew he was dead. That’s the only explanation that made any sense. I told you he wouldn’t walk off and leave Griff.”

  “Crystal, they haven’t even brought the car up. We don’t know he’s in there.”

  “He’s there. Leila’s going to freak.”

  “How so? She doesn’t like him.”

  “Of course not. She treated him like dirt. How’s she going to make her peace with that?”

  I hesitated, wanting to press. She was more vulnerable than I’d seen her. This might be my only opportunity. “What’s her anger about?”

  “It’s too complicated to go into.”

  “Nothing’s too complicated if he’s dead.”

  Crystal roused herself and turned. “Why should I tell you? You’re not working for me.”

  “I’m not working against you, either. What’s her problem?”

  “Why is that any concern of yours?�
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  “It isn’t, if you put it that way, but it’s going to get worse.”

  “I don’t doubt that,” she said. And after a long pause, “There’s been a certain amount of trauma in Leila’s life. She needs help sorting it out.”

  “She’s seeing a shrink?”

  “She’s been seeing one for years. At first, three times a week. Now it’s down to twice a month on weekends when she’s up from school.”

  “He has appointments on weekends?”

  “It’s a she.”

  “Sorry. I didn’t think psychiatrists were that obliging.”

  “This one is. She’s truly fabulous with kids. This is the fifth shrink Leila’s seen and I was at my wit’s end.”

  “How’d you find her?”

  “We were lucky for once. Charlotte Friedman’s a woman Anica went to school with. Her husband retired and they moved here from Boston.”

  “What sort of trauma? I’m still not getting it.”

  Crystal seemed to debate with herself. She stared straight ahead and when she spoke her tone was as flat and distant as an old phonograph record. “I had a little boy who drowned. Of course, it affected us all. That was the beginning of the end where Lloyd and I were concerned. Some things you never recover from. A child’s death is one.”

  “What happened?”

  “That was Jordie. My sweet one. He was eighteen months old. I was working one night and left him with the woman next door. She was talking on the phone when Jordie toddled out the screen door and fell in the pool. By the time she found him and called the paramedics, he couldn’t be revived.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I thought I’d die, but it was worse for Leila. Children aren’t prepared for loss. They don’t understand and it’s hard to explain death in terms that they comprehend. I’ve never been religious. I didn’t want to sell her a fairy tale, especially one I wasn’t buying myself. Dr. Friedman says when faced with the death of a sibling, some children disconnect. They act like nothing’s happened. Others, like Leila, start acting out. She’s difficult. You’ve seen it yourself. Rebellious. Emotional. I’ve talked to Charlotte – with Leila’s permission of course. Charlotte feels Leila’s behavior is her way of distancing herself, creating a barrier between herself and a world that she finds treacherous. If she doesn’t care about anyone, she can’t be hurt. At any rate, I know I’m protective. I’m not even sure how I’m going to tell her about all this.”

  “She’s here. Didn’t you see her back there with Lloyd?”

  Crystal sat up abruptly. “I had no idea. Where?”

  “Far side of the road, about three cars back. At least they were a while ago.”

  “I better see how she’s doing.” Crystal reached around the seat for a big black umbrella that was stashed on the floor. She opened the car door a crack and stuck the umbrella out, popping the automatic latch that caused it to thwop into full sail.

  “Thanks for the Hershey’s. You saved my life.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  The tow truck appeared, its headlights illuminating the roadway as far as the next curve. I opened the door on my side, tented my slicker over my head, and got out, closing the door behind me. I turned, watching as the tow truck driver’s assistant hopped out of the cab. Crystal passed him, trekking back along the road while the driver did a three-point turn and started backing up the slope. The heavy tires slipped, chewing two channels in the grass. The driver craned a look over his shoulder, one hand on the wheel. His assistant whistled sharply and gave rolling-arm instructions about the angle of ascent. The blond reporter caught sight of Crystal and moved to intercept her. Crystal shook her head, waving her off.

  I retreated to my car and turned the key in the ignition. The rain was reduced by now to an icy mist, soaking the unwary onlookers by slow degrees. The interior temperature had dropped while I was gone and the tepid breeze generated by the heater wasn’t even as effective as my own breath. I watched the tow truck slip sideways and then lumber backward up the hill to the top. I couldn’t imagine how they’d manage to haul the Mercedes out of the water and up the sodden hill.

  I turned, looking over the backseat to check Crystal’s progress. She’d reached Leila, who was standing by the side of the road with Lloyd. Lloyd had his arm around her, but the minute Leila saw Crystal she fled to her mother’s embrace. Crystal held her and rocked her where they stood, resting her face in Leila’s hair. After a moment, the three conferred; Leila looking miserable, Lloyd withdrawn. Whatever the debate, it was evident that Crystal prevailed. Mother and daughter passed my car in their return to the station wagon. Crystal was talking earnestly while Leila wept without sound. I watched as she settled her daughter in the front seat and then went around the rear of the car and slid in under the wheel.

  I adjusted my rearview mirror, keeping a watchful eye on Lloyd, who’d started toward his car, his head bent, hands in his jacket pockets. Maybe the two were in competition, playing good parent. Leila was the prize and Lloyd had been forced to forfeit this round. In mirror-reverse, I saw him light up a cigarette and belatedly I smelled smoke drifting through the damp night air. Idly, I wondered how far out into dark I’d have to go so I could pee without being arrested for indecent exposure.

  Detective Odessa, in a hooded water-repellent jacket, appeared at the crest of the hill and began his descent, his footing as tenuous as mine had been. He spotted my VW and began to tack in my direction. I leaned over and cranked down the window a couple of inches. He reached the car and peered in. Drizzle had collected on the shiny surface of his jacket and the water slid in runnels along the stitching in the seams. His nose was slightly too prominent and something in the shape of it left him just short of handsome. He gestured toward the work lights on the far side of the hill. “I want you to meet Detective Paglia.”

  I said, “Sure.” I rolled up the window and killed the engine. I got out, taking a moment to shrug into my slicker before I followed him up the hill. The two of us struggled together, Odessa holding on to my arm as much for stability as for support.

  I said, “How’s it going?”

  “It’s a bitch,” he said. “I see Crystal’s here. I sent an officer to the house. I thought she should know what was happening.”

  “What about Fiona? Anybody heard from her?”

  “Nope. We notified the daughter, but she can’t make it over here until the nanny gets back from dinner.”

  “Does she know where her mother is?”

  “Not offhand. She says she’ll put in a few calls and see if she can track her down. Otherwise we wait and hope she comes home.”

  We scrambled the last few yards to the top of the hill and stood there together staring down at the lake. The light from the flood lamps had washed the color from the scene. Steam rose like smoke where the rain came in contact with the hot metal flanges. An assortment of people stood in clusters, apparently waiting for additional technicians or equipment. I could see an eerie green glow moving under the surface of the water as a search went on in the depths. With the angle of the floodlights, the butt end of the Mercedes glimmered incongruously. “Is he in there?”

  “Don’t know yet. We’ve got a diver in the water. The shelf drops off sharply to a depth of twenty feet… this is five or six yards out. Car got hung up against a boulder or it’d be down on the bottom and we’d be out of luck.”

  The diver surfaced in a dark blue wet suit and hood, a compressed-air cylinder strapped to his back. He removed his mouthpiece and let it dangle as he waded ashore, algae clinging to his fins. He lifted off his face mask and left it resting on the top of his head like a hat. Once on shore, he was intercepted by the coroner and another man, both in raincoats, who listened while he reported, complete with gestures.

  Meanwhile, the tow truck had backed down within range of the shore. Two men in hip boots and yellow slickers had entered the water in preparation for the salvage operation. One was already attaching a chain to the Mercedes’s axle. As I loo
ked on, one of the two men miscalculated and slipped into deeper water, his slicker billowing out around him like a deflated life raft. He flailed, cursing, while his partner snorted with suppressed laughter and pushed forward through the water to lend him a hand.

  Odessa nodded in the diver’s direction. “That’s Paglia with the coroner.”

  “I gathered as much.”

  As if on cue, the other detective turned and caught sight of Odessa and me. He excused himself and headed in our direction across soft ground already trampled with footprints. Days of rain had obliterated any trace of tread marks, but the projected path of the car had been secured and searched. Evidence was doubtless in very short supply after so much time had passed. When he reached us, Detective Paglia held out his hand. “Ms. Millhone. Jim Paglia. Con Dolan’s spoken to me about you.” His voice was deep and uninflected. I placed him in his fifties. His head was shaved, his freckled forehead etched with a trellis of vertical and horizontal lines.

  We shook hands and said hi-how-are-you-type things. Lieutenant Dolan had been in charge of the homicide unit until a heart attack dictated his early retirement. “How’s Dolan doing these days?”

  “So-so. Good, but not great. He misses the job.” Paglia’s eyebrows were black twists that tipped up at the outer corners like a pair of wings. He wore small oval glasses with thin metal frames. If the raindrops falling on the lenses annoyed him, he gave no sign of it. He’d been smoking a cigarillo with a white plastic tip, dead by the look of it, extinguished by the rain. He removed it from his mouth and glanced at the tip. “We owe you a big one. How’d you happen to come down?”