A Death Displaced

by Andrew Butcher

  Juliet got up from her chair and hugged her grandmother. She had to bend slightly to accommodate the height difference. Her shoulder still ached from the portal exploding, but that didn’t matter right now.

  When Lillian stepped back, Juliet wanted to test something. She wasn’t aiming to be manipulative, but it was important to her.

  ‘Gran,’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘I was almost hit by a car a couple of weeks ago. It would have killed me. I was stood next to a drop, and I think it would have thrown me over.’

  Lillian’s face screwed up indignantly. ‘That must have been terrifying. Oh, Juliet, come here, sweetheart.’ She motioned her arms and pulled Juliet in for another embrace.

  In their tight hold, Lillian rubbed Juliet’s back reassuringly. Juliet struggled to remember when her mum last hugged her.

  ‘I don’t think my mum has ever hugged me.’ she said. Her voice gave way to candid sobbing.

  Lillian only held her tighter, then came away to look her granddaughter in the face.

  Simply, Lillian came out with, ‘I’m here now.’

  At Juliet’s cheeks, she planted loving kisses.

  Chapter 23

  Wednesday at work, Nick observed Mora’s behaviour; she seemed contrary. She would plod around, being her usual cheery self, and then she’d stop and look sullen every now and then. She’d put her lunch break at the same time as Nick’s and told him that they needed to talk.

  When it was time for their break, Nick and Mora went to Deirdre’s to eat. Nick liked the place less when it wasn’t decorated for a holiday. The tablecloths were a clinical white. Everything else was in plain, blocked colours. He was fond of Deirdre’s, but he missed Halloween already.

  ‘Alan’s quit work.’ Mora blurted, without warning.

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘Nicolas, I don’t know what’s came over him. I finally got through to his mobile yesterday and he said he wasn’t coming back to work again, he was sorry but he couldn’t face it. What’s that all about? He’d been asking for overtime a while ago. He’d never expressed any other grief at work before.’ her face scrunched up, and her green eyes had a sad glisten to them.

  ‘Odd.’ Nick replied. He fiddled with his fingers under the table, and his legs bounced up and down nervously. Telling Mora the facts about Alan was tempting, but she didn’t deserve the hurt. Juliet had said it was always better for people to know the truth; he shouldn’t coddle people.

  I don’t care what Juliet thinks. He decided that it was simply cold-hearted to tell some truths. I wouldn’t tell one of my friends that they’d gotten fatter if they’d put on the slightest extra bit of weight! He realised that that wasn’t the most relevant example, but his point was that the outcome was the same: The truth would hurt the other person, and it wasn’t necessary for them to know.

  ‘I’ve known him for years.’ Mora trailed off in thought.

  ‘Maybe he’s just having a hard time. He might come around.’

  With a shake of her head, she replied, ‘No. I don’t think he will. He was very clear that he would not come back. He said nothing could change his mind. Stubborn man.’

  ‘I’m sorry to hear that.’ he still twiddled his fingers under the table, but his legs had stopped bobbing up and down. Alan wasn’t returning to work, which hopefully meant he would leave Nick alone, and no one would ever know what happened between them.

  ‘Something’s different about you, Nicolas.’ Mora squinted as if her green eyes could dig out the difference in his face, ‘You seem more grown up all of a sudden. Or maybe fed up!’ she went into one of her giggle-fits. Some other customers in Deirdre’s looked across at her cackling, though not in a judgmental way. She had one of those laughs that made heads turn to locate the source.

  When her laugh subdued, Nick said, ‘I’m okay, Mora. Still the same old me. I think, I… I just feel better about my past. Better about Mum’s disappearance. I hadn’t realised how I’d let it hang over me for so long. I thought I was more over it than I was. But now I think I can actually move past it.’

  Mora smiled compassionately. ‘You have grown up.’ she laughed gentler this time. ‘If you ever want to talk, you know I’m all ears.’

  ‘Thank you, Mora.’

  ‘Anyway,’ she jiggled suddenly, like she’d remembered something that would have been fatal to forget, ‘I put our lunch at the same time for a reason, Nicolas. If you can and if you’d like to, I’d love it if you could work full-time at Creaky Crystals. Now that Alan’s done a one-eighty, you can have his hours. What do you say?’

  ‘Yes, please!’ the answer popped out.

  Perfect.

  Now he might actually earn enough money to have a bit to spare each month. This gain made getting beat up worth it. The attack was horrible at the time, naturally, but the bruises were in the process of healing now. He could hide away the traumatic memory. Essentially, he’d traded a week or so of physical pain for what would hopefully be a long time of mental relief. When it came to money, at least.

  When Nick returned to work with Mora, he smiled so wide that he couldn’t hide it. Mora let Janet and Michael know about Alan and that Nick was going full-time.

  ‘Congratulations!’ Janet scurried over to him. ‘I think that today is your lucky day.’

  ‘It’s been pretty good so far.’

  Janet walked side to side and smiled at him with mock guilt, ‘I have a confession to make.’

  ‘That doesn’t sound good.’

  ‘Mmm, it could be good if you let it be.’ she bounced her head left to right.

  ‘Okay… Go on.’

  ‘You know I said I’d set you up with the perfect woman? Well, she wants to meet you, and I think she is perfect for you. The thing is... you already know her. But don’t judge too fast! She’s changed so much these past couple of years. Even I can see that.’

  Who on earth are you setting me up with?!

  He rapidly said, ‘Just tell me who it is already.’

  ‘It’s Kerra Evans.’

  It was like his brain dislodged itself suddenly. His mind took a leap back into memories he’d locked away somewhere. He wasn’t sure if the shock on his face showed or not. Janet widened her eyes, waiting for a response.

  ‘My ex?’ he asked.

  ‘Yep. But honestly, she’s grown up so much, and she regrets the way she treated you before. She’s been asking after you for a while now. She wanted to know that you were doing well. I told her you’re doing fine and that you’re single and I’d see what I could do.’

  Nick had known that Janet was friends with Kerra’s mum, because they’d discussed his past before. Though, he hadn’t realised that Janet had been discussing his present life with the Evans family.

  ‘You know she cheated on me repeatedly?’ he asked, incredulity in his voice. But, even as he said it, he knew that he could forgive Kerra if she’d really changed. She was his first and only long relationship so far. The only woman he’d ever fallen in love with.

  ‘I know, I know. But she really wants to see you again. People can change, Nick.’ Janet said in a whiney tone.

  He believed that people could change. Sometimes, (usually when he felt low) he wondered if Kerra had been his ‘soul-mate’ and if he’d blew his chances somehow, and then he’d never meet the perfect woman because he’d already had his shot with her.

  That’ stupid. But after all the good and bad times that he’d been through with Kerra, he was certain that he could love her again. He knew he’d never forget her. But she’s not Juliet. Stop! I fancy Juliet, that’s all. I don’t love her. She’s just a good-looking woman that I’ll never see again. Full stop.

  ‘Alright, tell Kerra I’d like to see her. Maybe go to the pub for a drink first and see how it goes?’

  ‘I knew you’d come around. Oh, Nick! You won’t regret it.’

  Janet spoke with him for a while longer and he told her a day that was good for him to see Kerra. Towards the end of the conversation
, he was surprised at how anxious and excited he felt about seeing his ex. Maybe she really had changed.

  Before the end of his shift, Michael came over to congratulate him on getting a full-time position. Michael then expressed how much he’d miss Tom at college because Tom had decided to drop out.

  When Nick arrived home, he checked his bruises in the mirror. They were less swollen already, but still vivid in colour.

  He rang Tom to let him know that he would come over tomorrow evening. They could tell their dad everything then. Tom said that he and Tommy were free then, so that was fine.

  In bed, as he tried to doze off, he made an effort to recall the good experiences he’d shared with Kerra. He managed to fall asleep with a positive mood and a calm smile on his face.

  Thursday was a day that he always had off of work so that he could see his counsellor, Caroline. That might have to change now, as he was going full-time. He’d probably be working more of a Monday-to-Friday and nine-to-five pattern.

  He made a decision.

  In his black Vauxhall Corsa, he drove to the nearest corner-shop and bought a ‘Thank You’ card, a box of chocolates, and one of those gift-vouchers that could be used in multiple stores. He put ten pounds on the voucher; he didn’t even grumble at handing over the note.

  After returning home, it took a good while to find a pen. Then he wrote in the card:

  Caroline,

  I know you’re not supposed to accept gifts from clients, but I won’t tell anyone if you don’t! And anyway, I’ve decided that I’m not going to attend our sessions anymore. You’ve helped me to understand myself better than I used to, and I think things with my dad are going to improve from now on.

  I’m not upset as often as I used to be and I think it’s time that I try to face my problems alone.

  Thank you for everything. I wish you the best luck in the future.

  Nicolas Crystan.

  He slid the voucher inside the card, then the card into its envelope, and scribbled ‘Caroline’ on the front.

  At the surgery, he arrived for the session at the usual time and handed over the card and chocolates. He let her know that it would be his last session.

  ‘I trust your decision, Nicolas.’ she said, sat across from him. She nodded approvingly. ‘I’m going to have to sneak these chocolates out of here, or they won’t let me keep them.’ she tittered. ‘If you feel like you want to see me again in the future, then call the reception and we’ll sort out an appointment. There may be a waiting list though.’

  ‘Thank you, Caroline.’ he said.

  Caroline had the rest of the hour before the next client would arrive, so Nick updated her on his full-time position, and about his set date with Kerra. They chatted like friends until the hour was over. Caroline wished him good luck with Kerra and with his job, and then they parted with a handshake and warm smiles.

  He left the surgery hoping that he wouldn’t regret his decision. He could see that he’d been living as a stunted adult since he moved out of his dad’s house. So now it was time to sort his life out: Full-time work, a girlfriend, stable family relationships, start saving up if he could, and he might finally have the money to decorate the bungalow.

  I’m having a fantasy moment. Getting carried away again. But what’s the harm in dreaming?

  The afternoon passed by in his happy state and he did some food shopping. He spent a little more than usual. When evening arrived, he realised something: I’m not bothered about my ability to see the future. At least not now.

  It had occurred to him that he could try to use it will as he did before. Maybe even direct it to see if he’d ever meet Juliet again or find out if things with Kerra would work, or to discover if and how Ryan would cover up the death of Aldrich.

  No. Just let things unfold as they should for the time being.

  He was certain that he would use it at some point in the future. He wanted to. Just not now though. Plus, the premonitions seemed to have consequences, and he didn’t want the hassle. Maybe a vision would force itself upon him again, but he hoped not. Not until he was ready again.

  It was time.

  He’d figured out the best way to present the matter to his dad. He mulled it over as he drove away from Maw Street and around the corner.

  He would tell his dad about Aldrich’s ability but not about Juliet’s or his own. He’d lie and say to his dad that Juliet searched him out and told him she’d remembered seeing Samantha Crystan drive past her on the day that she disappeared. And also that Samantha stopped to ask Juliet which direction Grendel Manor was in.

  If his dad asked why Juliet never went to the police at the time, then he would say that she was young, only seventeen then, and didn’t know what to do. Also, he’d point out that it wouldn’t have made a difference anyway, as Samantha would have been dead by the time Juliet said anything.

  The only difference would have been that the police would have visited Grendel Manor, and Aldrich would have killed them, wiped their memories or brainwashed them into thinking he was innocent. So it turned out best that Juliet didn’t alert the police, or they’d never have found out the truth.

  It would be best to omit what he found out about the missing children. His dad and brothers didn’t need to know.

  Then the rest of the story was the same as the twins had witnessed. Aldrich’s ability didn’t work on the boys completely, and they managed to get him to tell them what happened to their mum. But maybe Nick would alter one more part: he’d tell his dad that Tommy killed Aldrich in self-defence, not in anger.

  When he arrived, he remained in his car for a moment. How could he go from having next to zero heart-to-hearts with his dad in the past eight years to jumping in the deep end and talking about the event that created the distance between them in the first place?

  With the fingers of his right hand together, he began tapping the centre of his left palm. I’m calm, I’m focused, I’m calm, I’m... SCREW IT. He flung his arms in the air and laughed at himself. It was a low chortle of resignation. He’d already thrown in the towel with counselling. If he was going to be his own therapist from now on, then he didn’t want to be doing relaxation techniques every time he got nervous.

  He tilted the rear-view mirror to face his own reflection. The hazel green-brown eyes looked back at him. He pointed at his duplicate and said, ‘It’s normal to get nervous sometimes.’

  After nodding at himself in agreement, he got out the car and approached the door, admittedly anxious, and then knocked.

  Tom let him in, and the two of them hustled up the stairs to discuss the conversation plan with Tommy. Nick explained how he intended to tell their dad. Tommy protested on some terms and expressed that he felt a bit ‘in the dark’ about some matters. Not everything matched up. Tommy agreed after some persuasion, and Nick led the way downstairs.

  His shaky hands pulled out a dining-table chair, and then he sat down. Tom and Tommy plonked down on the same side, with Nick in the middle. Tom had asked their dad to join them. He made clear that it was important.

  Sat across from them, John had a slumped posture. He faced his sons. His grey hair looked matted from a long day’s work, and his mouth was set in a subtle frown. His heavy green eyes waited, curious.

  Everything’s okay.

  He’ll be able to move on now.

  Finally.

  He can stop waiting.

  The dining-room clock ticked, highlighting the silence that waited to be filled.

  ‘Dad,’ Nick said with nervous dry lips.

  John seemed to sense the weight in Nick’s tone, ‘Yes, Nicolas.’

  ‘We, uhhh, we have something to tell you.’ He stuttered, ‘It’s about Mum.’

  Chapter 24

  Lillian didn’t stay on Monday night. She’d booked herself in at Tilly House, a hotel lucky enough to have a great view of the hills and the sea together. Juliet thought about letting her gran stay at her home. In the end, she didn’t say anything, but she did walk with Lillia
n to the hotel.

  On the way back, she regretted offering to walk her gran to the hotel. When someone came around a dark corner, she jumped with fright. Her mind wondered if she was safe knowing that people existed with abilities like Aldrich’s. Could someone make her disappear the way that Aldrich made Harry Cracknel vanish from Kim’s life?

  That night, she made an attempt to process the day’s events. Her mind shielded most of it out. Before going upstairs to her bedroom, she made certain that every window and door was locked tight. She drew every blind shut. Although she was terrified to be home alone, and worried that the police would come knocking or that Aldrich would appear as a spirit, she fell asleep in exhaustion.

  She woke in the night; her body soaked in cold sweat. Did she have a nightmare? She couldn’t recall, but was too fatigued to think. She rolled over to the other side of the bed and let sleep take her again.

  *

  On Tuesday, she met with her gran, and they reminisced over when Juliet was very young. They stayed in Juliet’s home to talk at first, but later went for lunch, then for a walk along the cliff edge and up to the hills.

  Juliet noticed that Lillian didn’t lack in energy. She had a cautious, elderly walk about her, but she kept up her pace and performed each action with vigour. With her mind on the subject of good health, she began to move her injured shoulder in circles. It didn’t hurt half as much as it did the day before. Had it healed already? She decided that she would check that evening.

  On their walk back along the cliff edge, Juliet felt certain for a moment that she would go to the police. She would turn Tommy in. Even though she felt awful for the Crystan family, because of what Aldrich did was wrong, the law was in place for a reason. Two wrongs didn’t make a right.

  I can’t though.

  She shook her head. Because of all the weird circumstances, she couldn’t go to the police. Also, she hated the idea of herself being linked to a murder case.

  ‘What’s on your mind, sweetheart?’ Lillian looked quizzically at Juliet. The wind flicked Lillian’s silvery-grey hair about. It was a good time to be heading back; as the sky steadily darkened.