Livin' the Life

by Lexi Ryals

  As soon as Zuri was out of sight, Jessie stood and opened the lid of the piano again. Ravi pulled himself up, rubbing his hand and looking slightly cross-eyed. “Not cool, Jessie,” he moaned. “Not cool.”

  The next day, Emma and Brett had another date, but this time Emma had planned it. She had plates of snacks and her favorite board game, Chick Chat, all spread out on the table in the living room for when Brett arrived. After he arrived—looking oh so cute—they sat on the couch to play.

  “Brett, are you sure you don’t mind playing a board game instead of watching football?” Emma asked him.

  “Nah. I mean, you went to all the trouble to learn about sports for me,” Brett said, smiling at her.

  Emma smiled back. “Well, that’s what couples do.” She just loved the idea of Brett being her new boyfriend.

  “Right. And I’m sure I’ll love playing…” Brett looked at the game box and read the name off the top. “Chick Chat.”

  “It’s my favorite!” Emma exclaimed. “You get to share secrets, earn good-hair-day points, and everybody wins! So really it’s a lot like football.”

  “Right,” Brett said slowly, his eyes looking a little glazed. “Only without the sports…or fun.”

  Just then, Brett’s phone beeped with a text message. He read it and laughed out loud, tilting back his head, before typing a quick reply.

  “Who’s that?” Emma asked.

  “Uh, no one,” Brett said quickly, putting down the phone. “Can I go first?”

  He rolled the dice and moved his game piece forward six spaces on the board.

  “Oh, no! You landed on a Nothing-to-Wear Square!” Emma told him. “Now you have to go back two spaces and buy a date outfit.”

  “You mean like…new sneakers?” Brett asked.

  Emma gasped. “Sneakers on a date? Ew. I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

  Brett cringed. “Sorry. I guess I’m better at games where I get to hit or tackle someone.”

  Emma thought for a moment and then said brightly, “Well, if you draw a Hissy Fit Card, you get to slap the person to your left!”

  Brett’s phone beeped again. It was another text. He read it, smiled, and then made an effort to look serious. “Hey, sorry, Emma, but I’ve actually gotta split. I have to, uh, study,” he told her.

  “But I thought we were going to go see that rom-com, The Really Attractive Woman Who’s Single for No Reason?” Emma protested.

  “I would love to, but my studies come first. You know how much athletes care about education,” Brett insisted. “Can’t you go see the movie with one of your friends?”

  “I guess so…” Emma began, but Brett stood and took his empty snack plate into the kitchen.

  Suspicious, Emma picked up his phone from the couch and scrolled through his texts. “He deleted his texts?” she muttered to herself. “Why would he do that? Something’s going on.” She reached over and checked Brett’s jacket pockets. Bingo! She found a slip of paper with a phone number written on it. Narrowing her eyes, she stuffed the paper into her own pocket just as he came back into the room, and she smiled at him.

  “Here’s your jacket, which has an unbelievable amount of pockets, by the way,” she said, holding it out for him. “Have fun studying!”

  “What?” Brett asked, looking confused as he slipped into his jacket. “Oh, right. Learning rocks! Have fun at your movie!” He smiled and then got on the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, Emma’s smile vanished.

  Jessie came rushing down the stairs, but she immediately stopped when she saw the sad look on Emma’s face.

  “What’s wrong?” Jessie asked gently. “Did you land on a Nothing-to-Wear Square?”

  “No! I think Brett might be cheating on me!” Emma explained. “Look. I found this phone number in his pocket. I bet it’s from a girl!” She showed the paper to Jessie.

  “Emma, do not jump to conclusions. I once thought my boyfriend was cheating on me because he always smelled like perfume and had lipstick on his collar,” Jessie told her.

  “And was he?” Emma asked.

  “Yes.” Jessie shook her head. “You know what, that was a bad example. Anyway, does it make you feel better?”

  “Well, it certainly makes me feel worse for you,” Emma admitted.

  “Don’t you move, you little rodent,” Jessie growled.

  “Whoa! Back off, old lady!” Emma countered, taking a step back.

  “Not you!” Jessie shushed her. “Look.” She pointed across the room, where Lucy was hopping through the screening room door. “I told you not to move! No one in this house listens to me!”

  Jessie ran toward the curtains and dove after Lucy, crashing to the floor. But when she lifted her hands, there was no Lucy beneath them. “One rabbit’s foot may be lucky, but four of them are kicking my butt!” Jessie groaned.

  Bertram had been in the kitchen for hours making his famous five-spice chili. As he stirred the pot, he sang loudly his own words to the tune of “The Ride of the Valkyries.”

  “My chili is perfect! Never is runny! Just needs red pepper!” Then he opened the cabinet and came face-to-face with Lucy. “Eek, it’s a bunny!”

  Lucy leapt from the cabinet right onto Bertram’s chest. “Aaaaaaarghhh!” Bertram screamed. He fell backward behind the island as he tried to get Lucy off him.

  Hearing his scream, Jessie ran in. “You found Lucy?” she asked.

  Bertram pulled himself up from behind the island, with no bunny in sight. “She attacked me!” he said breathlessly. “I managed to fight her off and she went up the back stairs. I think I was nibbled pretty bad.”

  Jessie patted him on the back reassuringly. “Bertram, I’d help you find a support group…but I’m pretty sure no one else on Earth has this problem.” Then she dashed up the back stairs to find Lucy.

  Bertram looked around nervously and then backed into the living room. The elevator dinged and Bertram, jumpy, spun around. Emma stepped off, looking downcast.

  “Emma?” Bertram put his hand to his chest, relieved she wasn’t Lucy. He walked over to her. “I thought you went to some chick flick.”

  “I did, but I left early,” Emma said sadly. “I don’t want to watch some girl get the guy when I’m losing mine.” Then she grabbed Bertram’s collar and shouted, “Brett’s cheating on me!”

  “Oh, that’s terrible! And after you gave him the best forty-eight hours of your life,” Bertram said with mock sympathy. “I think you should have a night on the town anyway.”

  Emma nodded. “Because I shouldn’t let some silly boy get me down?”

  Bertram snorted. “Because it means more chili for me.”

  “You’re right. I’m not going to just sit here and be upset. I’m going to call up this other woman and find out who she is.” Emma took out her phone and the slip of paper she’d found in Brett’s jacket. A determined expression crossed her face.

  “Again, only interested in your problem inasmuch as it pertains to chili,” Bertram reminded her.

  Emma punched in the number as Bertram walked hesitantly back toward the kitchen, his eyes watching the floor for any sign of the rogue bunny.

  A gurgling noise caught their attention. Then they heard it again and again.

  Bertram turned back to Emma, looking of-fended. “That’s rude. My chili happens to be delicious.”

  Emma put up her hand. “That wasn’t me. Wait a minute.…” She followed the noise into the screening room, where she found Luke and Brett watching football. Luke answered his phone, which was programmed with a gurgling ringtone.

  “Hey, Emma,” Luke said into his phone, motioning Brett to be quiet so Emma wouldn’t hear him. “How’s the movie?”

  “Well,” Emma said into her phone while standing in the doorway. “There’s a lot more heartbreak and betrayal than I was expecting!�
��

  Luke and Brett both froze at the sound of her voice and then turned toward the door. Emma was giving them both a look that could kill. Brett jumped up and rushed to her. “Emma, I swear, it’s not what it looks like.”

  “Good,” Emma said sarcastically. “Because it looks like my new boyfriend lied to me about having to study so he could watch football with my brother!”

  “Well, then I guess it is what it looks like,” Luke said, snickering.

  Brett turned to Luke. “Dude, FYI, awesome ringtone.”

  “Thanks, man. You get me,” Luke said, and they high-fived.

  Emma looked from Luke to Brett and then back to Luke, flabbergasted. “Luke, are you wearing Brett’s jersey?” she asked incredulously.

  “I got cold,” Luke said sheepishly.

  Emma was horrified. “Ew,” she said.

  Jessie was turning over the couch cushions for the fifth time, looking for Lucy.

  “Lucy! Lucy!?” Jessie called. “Where are you, you stupid rabbit?”

  She found a five-dollar bill wedged in the bottom of the couch and smiled to herself. She looked around and, seeing no one, slipped it into her pocket. “Lucy!”

  “Jessie!” Ravi called as he walked down the stairs.

  “Ahh! Ravi,” Jessie said nervously. “How long have you been standing there?”

  “Do not worry,” Ravi assured her. “I did not see you put that five-dollar bill in your pocket. But I have dire news.…”

  “It can wait,” Jessie said. “We have to find Lucy!”

  Ravi grimaced. “I am afraid Mrs. Kipling beat us to it. I found what was left of her in Mrs. Kipling’s cage.” He held out a piece of fluffy white fur.

  Jessie grabbed it from him and moaned. “Nooooooo!”

  Just then, Zuri walked off the elevator, home from her last playdate of the day. She rushed over to a distraught Jessie and Ravi.

  “Jessie, what’s the matter?” Zuri asked.

  “Um…” Jessie covered. “It just occurred to me that I…should’ve gone to college.”

  Zuri narrowed her eyes. “What’s that ball of fluff you’ve got in your hand?” she asked suspiciously.

  “Ravi’s belly button lint,” Jessie lied.

  “I have a very deep innie,” Ravi said, playing along.

  “Oh, okay.” Zuri shrugged and went up to her room.

  Ravi and Jessie exchanged looks.

  “I can’t believe she bought it,” Jessie said.

  “We were saved by the fact that only Mrs. Kipling has seen me topless,” Ravi replied.

  “I also can’t believe Mrs. Kipling ate Lucy for lunch!” Jessie added, studying the tuft of fur.

  “Technically, it was more teatime.”

  “Who cares what time it was?” Jessie snapped. “The point is Zuri’s class pet is halfway down a giant lizard’s colon!”

  “Technically, it would only be in her—” Ravi began, but Jessie interrupted.

  “Correct me again at your own risk!” she warned him.

  “Got it,” Ravi said. Then he added under his breath, “Stomach.”

  “What am I going to do?” Jessie wailed. “I gave Zuri this big speech about being responsible. And now, because of me, Lucy hippity-hopped into the light.”

  “Here is a wacky idea. You could tell Zuri the truth!” Ravi suggested.

  “I can’t do that!”

  “Because it will break her heart?”

  “Because she’ll break my legs!” Jessie countered. “Remember what Zuri did to that kid in the park who lost her doll?”

  Ravi winced. “Yes, I have never seen someone get picked up by their nostrils before.”

  “It was a snot-filled horror,” Jessie said, shaking her head. Then she perked up. “Wait! I have an idea.”

  “I cannot wait to hear your great idea,” Ravi said encouragingly.

  “All I need are some cotton balls, animal-safe dye, and a new rabbit!” Jessie beamed at him.

  Ravi sighed. “I continue to wait.”

  Back in the screening room, Emma was at her wit’s end. She just couldn’t believe that Brett would lie to her so he could hang out with her gross younger brother instead of enjoying a romantic afternoon with her. What was wrong with him?

  “Brett, if you wanted to watch the game with Luke, why didn’t you just tell me?” Emma asked him.

  “I didn’t want to hurt your feelings,” Brett explained.

  “Well, it’s too late for that!” Emma stomped her foot.

  Luke tried to butt in. “Emma, I really think—”

  “And you, Luke!” Emma cut him off. “I can’t believe you did this to me. We’re family!”

  “Don’t blame him,” Brett said. He took her hand. “I knew you wanted to see that movie, but I really wanted to watch the game with Luke. It’s my fault. I was weak! So weak…”

  Emma turned away dramatically. “I just can’t look at you right now.”

  “Enough! This is all my fault!” Luke interjected.

  Brett turned to Luke and put his hand on Luke’s shoulder. “No, Luke. Don’t blame yourself!”

  “Please, Brett, I feel cheap enough as it is.” Luke hung his head. “I’m sorry, Emma.”

  Emma threw a hand up in the air. She looked like she was going to cry.

  “There’s only one thing to do. Brett…” Luke continued. He couldn’t stand to see his sister so unhappy. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore. Have I cherished our time together? Yes. But it’s over.”

  “Luke, no!” Brett looked horrified.

  “We’ll always have the Jets games,” Luke said wistfully.

  “Luke, don’t be rash!” Brett pleaded.

  Luke took off Brett’s jersey and gave it back to him. “I said it’s over!”

  Brett nodded and started to walk out, but he stopped just shy of the door.

  “No! Don’t look back,” Luke begged him.

  Brett took a deep breath and walked out without turning around.

  Emma looked from the door to Luke and shook her head. “What the heck just happened here?”

  Luke cringed. “I made a mistake. I never should have come between you and your boyfriend. Can you forgive me?”

  Emma sighed. “I guess so. The truth is…Brett and I really don’t have that much in common. And I think he was only pretending to like Chick Chat.”

  “Emma…are you saying what I think you’re saying?” Luke asked hopefully.

  Emma nodded and grinned. “Yeah, I’m going to break up with him. He’s all yours.”

  “Yes!” Luke exclaimed, and then hugged his sister. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He hugged her again and then ran after Brett. “Brett! Come back! The Rangers game is on in twenty minutes!”

  Emma plopped down in a chair and grabbed the remote. “Ugh! I am done with boys.” Then she leaned forward to get a better look at the football players on TV and brightened. “Oooh. He’s cute!”

  Ravi looked skeptically at the wiggling imposter bunny he held. Jessie was dabbing at the rabbit with a cotton ball dipped in black dye. She was creating dark spots on the rabbit to make it look just like Lucy. Jessie hoped her plan was going to work.

  “Okay, this is going to work,” Jessie announced confidently.

  “How can you be sure?” Ravi asked.

  “’Cause I got nothing else.” She pulled out a picture of Lucy and compared it to the new rabbit. “There! They could be twins. Zuri will never know the difference.”

  Zuri walked out onto the terrace, looking excited when she thought she saw Lucy through the door. Jessie threw the bowl of dye and cotton balls into a planter nearby before Zuri could see them.

  After a quick glance at the bunny, Zuri turned to Jessie with a stern look on her face. “Hey, what happened to
Lucy?” Zuri asked.

  “Guard your nostrils,” Ravi hissed at Jessie.

  “Zuri, what do you mean? Nothing happened to good old Lucy! Which is this little gal right here…Lucy…the bunny…”

  Ravi passed the bunny to Zuri.

  Zuri took the rabbit and studied it for a moment. “She looks different. And her nose is twitching a lot slower.”

  “No, it’s not,” Jessie countered. She reached over and pushed the bunny’s nose up and down faster with her finger.

  “Jessie, why are you twitching her nose?” Zuri asked.

  “It’s a little game we play, see?” Jessie said, her voice getting more and more shrill with anxiety. Then she reached over and twitched Ravi’s nose for him.

  “Fun!” Ravi said nasally.

  “Okay,” Zuri said, looking skeptically at them both. “I think Lucy and I will just head upstairs. And not because you’re freaking me out at all,” she added sarcastically. She cuddled the bunny to her chest and carried it up to her room.

  “You can stop playing with my nose now,” Ravi suggested in the same nasal tone.

  “Oh, sorry!” Jessie let go. Then she smiled gleefully. “I told you she’d believe that’s her bunny!”

  Later that night, in the living room, Jessie and Ravi were stretched out on the couch, watching TV. Jessie was feeling inspired, by Emma, to watch a rom-com, and who better to watch it with than her partner in crime?

  “This is not my bunny!” Zuri announced from the staircase. Her shirt was covered in black dye and she was waving a streaky-coated Lucy 2.0 in Jessie’s and Ravi’s faces.

  “What makes you think that?” Jessie asked nervously.

  “Her spots are coming off, and she smells like Mom after a hair appointment,” Zuri told her.

  “Because…I gave Lucy some lowlights,” Jessie said, covering. “It really minimizes those ears.”

  “Not your best,” Ravi hissed at Jessie.

  Zuri glared at both of them. “Okay, truth time. Where is Lucy?”

  Jessie sighed. She knew that she had to come clean. “Okay…the truth is…I lost Lucy.”