“The morning frost lingered until noon in the shadows of all the tall, multilayered huts, that city humans are so fond to build one nearly on top of the other. It’s as if
class=Section3> they build each one taller than the next, just so it can breathe. Anyway, not far from these huts was a rather large lake which had been frozen over for the better part of a moon’s cycle. Everyday, just before noon I would race back and forth, as fast as I could over that icy plane until my chill factor dropped well below zero. I knew that right at noon hoards of humans would soon come pouring out of those tall, warm huts and race across the icy ground and into another tall, warm hut. It was the oddest sight to see, a daily ritual - strictly a human phenomenon. I was...."
"River? Ice? Towering huts?” Keyshi didn't have the slightest idea what Tonc was jabbering about, so quickly became bored and began to look for something playful to do. Nonchalantly easing its way out of the shadows, it crept to the gully’s crest and looked out over the desert plain. Hundreds of miles of barren sand stretched out endlessly in every direction.
Finding nothing of interest, Keyshi continued to feign attention to the incessant rambling, while gliding slowly along with, but some distance from, Old Tonc, who, though dying, still retained sufficient cold to give the little summer breeze a devastating bite.
Tonc didn't seem to notice Keyshi's inattentiveness. Although it did follow Keyshi's lead partially up the gully slope, while taking care to stay out of the sun’s direct rays. Huffing and puffing with greater difficulty, Tonc's words began to slur together like the low, gentle hissing sound of an autumn wind blowing through the rustling leaves of a forest - a most pleasant sound to many. Keyshi, however, found it extremely annoying.
It is a natural phenomenon that when a discourse is raised to the level of a loud noise it can be readily ignored. But when a conversation is barely audible, one has an innate instinct to listen to it more closely. So it was that Keyshi found itself paying closer attention to Old Tonc’s tale.
"... as cold as ice, myself, when I returned to the city streets. I figured my chill factor was twenty degrees below zero - minimum. It was a perfect day for me to play one of my favorite meanies on a human."
"Chill factor? Is that what this old wind puffer said? Ha! I think it makes up every other word. Well, why not? It’s telling this tale like humans really existed. What will this old windsack make up next?"
Now, Keyshi had no idea what a chill factor was but it did know that the lowest temperature it had ever heard of was 65 degrees above zero: the temperature which will bring a sudden end to the life of a summer breeze.
Keyshi fell into the common snare of judging truth by the limitations of one's own personal experiences, and to disbelieve, out-of-hand, any evidence of which one is ignorant. So far, the only part of the story which interested Keyshi was the dire reality that the old puffer might not even make it to the end of the telling.
Tonc paused awhile, huffing and puffing to generate enough breath to continue. “As I was saying, it was just high noon and, as was their habit, the humans came pouring out of their huts, like water gushing through an opened dam, scurrying in all directions, rushing across crowded streets, just to dash into some other hut that another bunch of humans was rushing to escape. I'll tell you, little breeze, of all the life forms in the world, none have a behavior pattern as bewildering as humans. There they were all safe and warm protected from the likes of me and my companions, but were they content? No! All at once, they’d all get this urgent impulse to flee their comfortable environment and run to a different hut which was neither better nor worse than the one they were in such hurricane hurry to get out of. Heck, if I hated the cold as much as they do, I'd just stay put where I was, wouldn't you? Not them! Oh, no. But why they would engage in this ritual, day after day, week after week, year after year, all winter long, is still a puzzlement to me. Ah, well, they were, after all, only human, you know."
No Keyshi didn't know.
“Would you believe,” (puff, puff) Old Tonc grew excited by the memory, “while I was out there dancing across that frozen river water, bringing my temperature down below zero, there were also humans out there dancing on the ice? I tell you - Ha, ha, (huff puff) ha! - it was a real thrill for me to assist them along with an occasional blast to their backside, sending them sliding across that slippery surface, and watching them make all sorts of contorted efforts to stay upright. Few were successful. Ha, ha, what fun!” (Puff)
"Backsides, huh?” Keyshi pictured what it imagined a human’s backside might look like. “Okay, okay that’s funny, I guess,” it concluded.
"But, but wait, ha, ha, ha (huff, huff, puff, puff, snort). I digress from my confession. Let's see, uh, where was I? Oh yes. These humans would bundle themselves up in layers of heavy material in an effort to keep me from getting close to their tender, pale skins and giving them a good old fashioned, frosty nip. Some of them, I must admit, did a pretty good job of it, too. But, like all other bio-creatures, there are two kinds of humans, if you know what I mean."
No, again, Keyshi didn't know and wished the old wind would quit bringing to light just how little it really knew about the world in which it had been conceived. Before Old Tonc came along Keyshi had been quite satisfied it knew all it would ever need to know or care to know. Now, the little summer breeze was forced to face its own nescience, and it didn’t like it one iota.
"Yup, there were those who wore garments that fit like the bark of a tree. The material was wrapped protectively about each limb. In the early days these were mostly male humans. However, as the orbits went by, more and more of the female humans were wearing these, too. Still, many of the females, especially those who worked in the taller buildings, wore garments wrapped only about their hips, hanging down like open umbrellas. These barely covered half of their vulnerable limbs which poked downward like twin umbrella handles."
"Umbrellas handles?” Keyshi huffed under its breath. "If the old puffer must use similes, at least it could liken them to something familiar."
"My favorite meanie was to sneak up behind one of these unsuspecting, foolishly clad humans and shoot a blast of freezing air right up her umbrella, turning it inside out. Sometimes, if it was just one of those wraparound kind, I could steal it right out off her and carry it along for a half a block. You should have heard those female humans scream, ‘My umbrella, my umbrella, catch my. . .’ No, that’s not what they called them. Oh yes, I can hear those shrill voices as if it were yesterday. ‘My skirt, my skirt, someone catch my skirt!’ they’d scream as they came running after it right behind me, huffing and puffing until they were red in the face. (Huff, huff, puff - Chuckle)”
“Of course, I'd float their skirt along just high enough to keep it out of any human’s grasp, and just fast enough to give the poor panting human just the slightest glimmer of hope that at any moment it would fall within their grasp. Of course, it never did. Ha, ha, ha! (puff) Oh, what delightfully, devilish fun that was."
At last the old winter wind had Keyshi's full attention. Nobody enjoyed hearing the tale of a good mischievous prank more than a summer breeze, even if it were only make-believe. Of course, the pranks of big northern winds were too severe to merely be called pranks, or even meanies. What they were, in fact, were torments - nothing less.
"That's how what I am about to confess to you came about,” Old Tonc reflected, in words barely audible. The humor it had expressed moments earlier had dissipated quicker than a bio-creature’s sneeze. The sudden emotional shift caught Keyshi, who was still feeling mischievously gleeful, by surprise, flooding his being with a wide range of confused emotions. So much so, it might have shed moisture droplets, if it could.
Old Tonc slowly, silently drifted down among the darker shadows in the gully. Its breath strained for each huff and puff. The silence went on for longer than Keyshi felt comfortable. With each passing degree of the sun, the little summer breeze felt more and more anxious. Soon the noonday sun would be directly overh
ead and the old winter wind would have nowhere to hide.
"By the Great Blunderblow!" Keyshi cursed. “Just when your boring, long-winded, tale starts to get somewhat interesting, you go and fall silent. Now what? Are you just going to blow away without finishing what it was you set out to tell me in the first place? Well, fine! But I’ll tell you right here and now, I'm not going to be like that when I get old,” Keyshi vowed, as if it would actually remember the vow when its time came.
Old Tonc continued to drift along in silence, offering no response to the tirade. If it hadn’t been a winter wind, Keyshi could have given it a couple of puffs of its own. However, a summer breeze is a warm breeze and the warmer a winter wind gets, the nearer it comes to death. So there was nothing Keyshi could do, but wait silently for the inevitable.
It wasn’t an easy wait. For contrary to Keyshi’s innate predisposition to naturally have contempt for any winter blowhard, it wasn’t the non-continuation of the tale Keyshi dreaded, but the non-continuation of Old Tonc. For despite all the reasons it was illogical for a brutish winter wind and a prankish little summer breeze to be friends, Keyshi discovered it liked - truly liked - the old ice duster and would truly, truly miss it after it was gone.
They had just come to a desert plateau which fell sharply into a deep ravine, extending for about two miles. With every puff it could muster, Old Tonc eased its way to the edge of the plateau. Then, collecting itself into a tight mass, it started to go into a slow spiral as it plunged over the parapet. Down, down, down it went. Faster and faster it spun until it was clipping along at a good forty-five knots. Although Keyshi had anticipated the move, it could barely keep up.
Of course Keyshi could have fallen in directly behind Old Tonc and sailed along effortlessly in the vacuum created by the spinning motion, but just because it was young and foolish, it wasn't altogether stupid. Keyshi didn’t know how long Old Tonc could keep up this whirlwind effect, and, if it suddenly pooped out, it could collapse in around Keyshi, crushing the little summer breeze like a nut in the jaws of a hungry squirrel. Then, Keyshi's warm air would be mingled with Old Tonc’s relatively cooler air and the next thing you know there wouldn't be any Old Tonc nor a playful little summer breeze called Keyshi.
When Old Tonc finally did come to a halt, it felt somewhat rejuvenated - at least for awhile. Keyshi, on the other hand, was exhausted, and before it could even compose itself, Old Tonc had begun to speak with a noticeable sense of urgency.
"I got back to the heart of the city, where most of the multilevel dwellings called building are amassed, just before the daily high noon human exodus. As I circled about the many tall, stately buildings, I looked into one of the large shaded windows at the fiftieth level and saw one of those slender, female humans inside. She didn't look very different from the other female humans in the building except this one had green limbs poking down from a short piece of extremely thin protective wear. Well, I'll tell you nothing irks a winter wind more than something or someone not showing proper respect for the harshness of a good winter day. And there was this little bit of a life form dressed more for the likes of you, than me. Oh sure, she was comfortable enough swishing around in her flimsy covering in the warmth of that protected building, but if I could have found a way to get in there, I'd have shivered her timbers, I'll tell you that. (huff, puff, puff)
"Careful, old-timer. You’re getting yourself all worked up into a frenzy,” Keyshi said with genuine concern. It certainly didn't want to miss the end of the story now.
Eventually, Old Tonc got its breath under control and peered wearily at its companion, and wondered, again, why fate had played such a trick as to provide it with such an infantile confessor to receive its most grievous confession. With a deep sigh of acquiescence Tonc continued.
"As was the custom, whistles from the river docks and bells from the church steeples began to fill the air, signaling the advent of high noon. Immediately, hundreds of humans came pouring out of their protected buildings, and began darting and dashing everywhere, but mostly just to some other tall building. I, of course, dove amongst them and had a joyous time playing all kinds of meanies. To my good fortune, a few of the big, far-northern winds had just blown into the city and began to blanket the entire downtown area with a thin layer of snow. Immediately, the humans began opening their umbrellas and I knew my fun had only just begun. Then I spied her - the female I had seen through the window,” Old Tonc's voice became low and somber.
Keyshi shivered with a slight chill. Not desiring to miss even a word, it had moved dangerously close to the old winter wind whose voice had become a low roar like an ocean breeze exploring hidden caverns along a rocky reef at low tide.
"She stepped out into the bitter cold of the day wearing little more than she had been wearing when I saw her inside earlier. She had a hat on her head - more fit for Easter than Christmas. And wrapped about her upper torso was the hide of some other poor bio-creature having the misfortune of being adorned with such a beautiful outer covering that some humans, in a fit of jealous rage I suppose, confiscate it from its natural owner to cover their own otherwise drab exteriors. But, again, I digress."
Keyshi shivered again and moved away slightly.
"So, there she was at the top of the ten steps that formed the entrance, talking to some male human at the door who took something from her, then went jogging off down the street. As she looked after him she stepped toward the uppermost stair. She just stood there with her arms wrapped about her chest and her spindly exposed limbs rapping together in uncontrollable spasms. I tell you, I've never been treated with such disrespect in all my years. All I could think was, 'Who does this female human think she is, coming out here to face a winter wind, dressed in those skimpy coverings?'"
Old Tonc's voice now rose to a loud roar and Keyshi had no trouble hearing every nuance of its guttural uttering.
"It made me furious and I decided to teach her a lesson - to make an example of her. I swooped down to a side street, cut through a narrow, cluttered alley, then shot across a parking garage and came out onto the main street about three blocks from where the female was standing at the top of the stairs. Putting myself into high gear, I raced down the street toward her, absorbing every snow flake in my path, while keeping low enough to steal every degree of cold I could from the sheet of ice lining the street gutters. This extra cold allowed me to crystalized some of the gentle snowflakes into sleet for an extra cold blast. I must say, I was one rapidly moving, nearly frozen solid, son of a blizzard when I reached the bottom of those steps on which that human female was standing.” There was no lack of self-admiration in Old Tonc's voice.
Caught up in the telling and the listening of the tale, neither Keyshi nor Old Tonc were paying much attention to the encroaching sun overhead. The shadows in the deep ravine were slowly giving way to its golden rays. Keyshi, still clinging to every word of the story, again got too near Old Tonc, but this time barely shivered, being warmed by the generation of its own excitement.
"Without hesitation I dashed straight up those icy steps and right up under her flimsy umbrella covering. Swoosh! It shot up right over her head. There was a quick ripping sound, then I'm dashing up the side of the building carrying that flimsy get-up all covered with multicolored patterns of wild, spring flowers. About three stories up the building, was a seldom used metal pole which had once been adorned daily with its own bright, multicolored swatch of cloth. I snagged the female’s covering to the tip of the pole and made it flap about in my tail wind to draw attention to my glorious symbol of victorious outrage.”
“Meanwhile, that human female didn't know what hit her. She let out a scream then started dancing and flapped about trying to cover her exposed parts until she stepped right off the top step and went slipping and bouncing all the way down to the sidewalk, where she did a triple twirl on her bottom before coming to rest in a shallow puddle of wet ice, thawed by a human sewer vent.”
“Was she dead?” Keyshi burst into the telling
. “I hear humans are quite fragile.”
“No! I had covered the steps with soft snow as I raced up them earlier. I didn’t want to hurt her - physically. I just wanted to bruise her stubborn pride a little. Now, don’t interrupt again! So where was I? Oh yes, I did a loop-the-loop and gave her one more freezing blast as I passed by a second time and dashed across the street. I was howling all the way. It was the best meanie I had ever played on a human. Even the other humans thought so. Hardly a one who saw what happened didn't open their mouths and stretch their lips across their teeth, while making intermittent vocal sounds, which is, of course, a human expression of humor. Many, in fact, howled with resounding laughter.” (Puff! Puff!) Old Tonc gasped for air, then continued its tale.
"When I reached the other side of the street I ascended another building to about the ninth level where I engaged in several joyous victory loop-the-loops. When I finally stopped to rest, for it had been quite an exhilarating, though somewhat exhausting task even for a great northerner like myself; I saw below, my torment was not yet completed. Several other humans (mostly males) had gathered around the female and were apparently trying to help her get up, but (Ha! Ha! Ha! huff, puff, Ha!) when I made that second pass I inadvertently froze that little puddle of icy water in which she was sitting. As it turns out, her legs weren't really green after all. She was wearing some other kind of garment which fit as tightly as a snake’s skin. This covering had been frozen to the ice and the poor female was stuck fast. Luckily, the thin material insulated her own flesh just enough so it didn’t freeze as well. A half dozen humans were gathered around, holding her by all four appendages a few inches off the ground, just to make sure it didn’t happen.”
“Meanwhile, another half dozen humans were standing around giving all kinds of advice on what should be done next. The thin green material was still stuck to the ice, so they decided to slip her right out of them, right there on the side walk. This proved to be no easy task. That female was putting up an awful fuss and screaming to the top of her powerful, young lungs."
Pieces: Book One, The Rending Page 12