Starshine

by Melody Winter

“Please?” he said, drawing out the word.

  I narrowed my eyes before slowly standing. “What do you want?” I asked as I moved toward him.

  “Not here,” he whispered. “Over there, away from everyone.” The warmth of his hand rested on the small of my back as he urged me to move across the room. My mouth was suddenly dry, and my skin alight where he touched me. And I could smell him. His cologne wrapped around my senses as I breathed deeply. I had only ever dreamed about being this close to him.

  He stopped our walk when we reached the corner of the room. Bending his head to my ear, he whispered. “I don’t want everyone listening.”

  He was so, so close, and to have the heat of the full length of his body next to mine was causing me to overheat in a most ridiculous way. I fought how I was reacting, willing myself to calm. I didn’t want him to see how he affected me.

  He took a step backward, and scanned the room with narrowed eyes. One of the sound engineers happened to be looking in our direction.

  “What are you looking at buddy? Get back to work, or I’ll make sure you never work on a film of mine again!”

  I tutted at his outburst, and crossed my arms in front of my chest. “He probably won’t want to ever work with you again after all this anyway,” I informed him. “I know I’d pay money to not see you again when filming finishes.”

  His bright eyes turned to me, flashing wildly as he observed my protective stance. His hands travelled to his hair and rubbed the back of his head before looking directly into my eyes. “I wanted to apologise.” His voice was quiet, unsure.

  “What?” I exclaimed, completely surprised.

  “Shhh . . .” He moved closer again. “I don’t want everybody to hear.”

  “But . . . but you just apologised.”

  “Exactly. Believe me, I don’t make a habit out of it.”

  I managed a smile at his admittance. “No, I don’t suppose you do. But what exactly are you apologising for?” I was curious as to what had sparked his words.

  “Well, last night for starters. I shouldn’t have left you there like I did. It wasn’t nice.”

  “No, it wasn’t.”

  “Hmmm . . . as I said, sorry.” He paused, frowning even more. “I also want to apologise for the way I’ve been speaking to you.”

  I breathed deeply, wondering where this Alex Denton was coming from. I contemplated whether he was playing with me, and any second now he would revert to how he had been yesterday. But as I concentrated on his serious face, there was no sign of the precocious and arrogant man I had witnessed yesterday. I now saw the Alex Denton that I’d seen in interviews; the man who I had believed in before all this.

  “Okay. I accept your apology.” I hoped that he wouldn’t make me regret it.

  “Good. Thank you.” His lips curled into a smile.

  “But that doesn’t mean you can start being nasty again,” I said, closely watching his reaction.

  He swallowed, his jaw flexing tightly. “Agreed,” he said seriously. “Well, I’ll try.” His smugness returned as he smirked. His eyes fixed on mine, and for a split-second I caught an intensity in his gaze that was un-nerving. It was a burning look, one that caused a lightness in my chest, and made my heart beat incredibly fast.

  It was the look that Erin had mentioned earlier.

  “Ella!” Rowan called from across the studio. I turned in his direction.

  “Seems Mr Crisp Muncher wants you.” Alex grinned as his eyes followed mine toward Rowan.

  I couldn’t help but laugh at Alex’s nickname for him. “Crisp Muncher?”

  “Yeah. You’ve seen how many packets of crisps he eats. Just don’t let him munch on anything of yours.”

  I dipped my head and stared at the floor. I fiddled with the sleeves of my cardigan as I recognised the heat of a flush creeping across my cheeks.

  “Oh fuck. He’s already made a move on you, hasn’t he?” Alex said.

  “I . . . he asked me out just a few minutes ago, before you came in,” I admitted.

  “What did you say? Don’t tell me you agreed.” His voice had risen in pitch.

  “I turned him down. I’m too busy with college. By the time I get home in an evening I don’t fancy doing anything other than curling up with a book and a bottle of wine.”

  “A bottle of wine? Do you have a drink problem, Ella?” He raised his eyebrow, and the humour in his expression caught me off-guard. Was Alex Denton flirting with me? Seriously?

  “Ella!” Rowan shouted, this time I noted the more than slight agitation in his voice.

  “I need to go” I said. “Sorry.”

  Alex nodded, but reached for my arm. His fingers wrapped around my wrist. “Ella, if he pesters you, let me know. I’ll have a word with him.”

  “There’s no need,” I replied.

  I was puzzled as to where all his concern was coming from. This wasn’t how I had expected him to behave after yesterday’s display. This Alex Denton was the one I had fantasied over for years.

  “Even so, please tell me if he becomes overbearing. Oh, and I’ll give you a lift home tonight. It’s not a problem. And it’ll stop him forcing you to accept a lift with him. Just tell him you’re with me if he starts asking questions.”

  “What? What do you mean—with you?” It sounded strange, probably because I’d zoned out of the conversation and lost myself in my fantasies.

  “For the drive home,” he said. “I feel it’s the least I can do after my behaviour yesterday.”

  I forced myself to focus. “Okay. That would be . . . errr, very kind.”

  He nodded at Rowan. “Run along then Ella. Don’t keep Crisp Muncher waiting.”

  I chuckled quietly at the use of Rowan’s nickname.

  “Thank you,” I said.

  In the last few minutes, Alex had renewed my faith in him. Seeing him like this had also strengthened my belief that it was Amy who caused him to be the vile human he had been yesterday.

  I ambled across the room toward Rowan just as Amy burst through the studio doors. Turning back to look at Alex, I caught the change in him. His back was straight and his mouth already set in a mocking sneer. He was scowling, looking just like he had yesterday.

  I was so busy contemplating the changed appearance of Alex that I didn’t look where I was going.

  I crashed straight into Amy.

  Her loud shriek pierced the quietness of the studio as she fell to the floor.

  “You stupid cow!” she screamed.

  “I’m so sorry,” I said as I bent down and offered her my hand.

  “Sorry?” she hissed. “You will be. If I’ve broken anything you can kiss goodbye any career you ever wanted in films!”

  I wanted to run from the room, free myself from the staring eyes of all the people. Not only did my face heat, but my neck and ears burnt impossibly hot. I swallowed quickly, trying to fight through my embarrassment and upset, and reached for her elbow, ready to help her to her feet. “Please, let me help,”

  “Get your grubby, slutty hands off me!” she yelled.

  I froze.

  My upset halted its march upon my senses.

  That was twice, in less than twenty-four hours, that I had been referred to as slutty. My anger at the way I was being spoken to pushed ahead of the tears that had fallen. I jerked my hand away from her.

  My upset was replaced by anger.

  Slutty.

  Me?

  When she behaved as she did?

  She remained on the floor, clutching at her knee, and staring at me in disbelief. But all I saw was Amy’s nasty side. A side she never, ever, let the public see. And what had she just called me?

  “Grubby, slutty hands?” I growled at her. “Slutty hands?”

  “Ella.” Alex’s soft voice caressed my ear. His hand rested on my shoulder.

  “No!” I snapped. “How dare she call me slutty? Her of all people? When she behaved how she did? When she did what she did to you? How dare she?” My anger pushed through me a
t an alarming rate. Even though she was still on the floor, I wanted to step forward and slap her face.

  Amy’s wide eyes caught my own before she glared at Alex.

  “You told her?”

  “I never said a word. But I’m beginning to wish I had. I quite like seeing Ella fired up.”

  Alex’s hand still held my shoulder, but now I was aware of the comforting way his thumb was moving in small circular movements.

  “You . . . you promised you’d never say anything.” Amy’s words were angry, but I also detected a real sense of fear in her tone.

  “I haven’t. I have no idea how Ella knows. Perhaps Simon has blabbed about everything. He never could keep his fucking mouth shut,” Alex snapped.

  “He would never say anything,” she retorted angrily.

  “Hmm, I guess you’re right. You two have your reasons for keeping it all quiet, don’t you? Doesn’t do your public image any good to know the truth, does it? Whereas mine. Holy shit. Yeah, I’m fair game for all the mud-slinging that comes my way!”

  “It’s because you’re an ass. I hate the day I ever met you!”

  The room fell silent, even Alex didn’t reply. But his thumb pressed even harder into my shoulder.

  “Now,” Amy said. “Are you going to help me up?”

  Alex gave his reply, loud and clear. “No way, Amy. You pick your fucking self up. I’m taking Ella away from your madness. Give her some time to compose herself.” His arm tightened on my shoulder as he whispered. “Let’s get you away from all these watching eyes. We need to talk.”

  I nodded. A sudden coldness hit me and I began to shake.

  What had I done?

  “C’mon,” he said, guiding me to the studio doors.

  My tears took a hold again. I had knocked a film star to the ground, and she was currently threatening to ruin my dream of working in film production. But more to the point, Alex Denton currently had his arm around me, and was hugging me to his side.

  Was this real?

  Was this actually happening?

  “Alex, I need to speak to Ella.” Rowan rushed toward us as we approached the doors.

  “Fuck off, Rowan. Pick Amy up and sort her out. I’ll be back soon. Then we can start filming.”

  It was only when the doors to the studio swung shut, and we were away from the stifling atmosphere in the studio that I snapped free from my dazed reverie.

  “Oh shit, I’m sorry,” I apologised as I pulled at my cardigan sleeve to wipe my tears.

  “Hey, don’t worry about it. I find girls crying quite a turn on.” He chuckled quietly. “Look, I can take you to the canteen if you want, get you a drink and a cookie, or we can pop in here.” He stopped outside his dressing room door. “It’s a bit more private than the canteen, but I understand if you’d rather go there.” He inclined his head toward the doors at the end of the corridor.

  “In here’s fine.” I sniffed. I didn’t think I’d cope very well with even more people watching us—not at the moment.

  Alex released his arm from my shoulder as he ushered me into his room.

  “Here, take a seat.” He patted the chair he’d been sitting on earlier, and then strode across the small room. Seconds later he perched himself on the counter in front of the mirror, two glasses and a bottle of whiskey in his hands. It was a welcome sight to look at him as he faced me, rather than my own dreadful reflection.

  “Drink?” he offered, holding the bottle up.

  “I’ve never tried whiskey,” I admitted.

  He put the glasses down on the counter top, and unscrewed the top of the whiskey bottle.

  “First time for everything, Ella. And it’s good for shock.”

  “I’m not in shock.”

  “I say you are. Don’t argue with me.”

  I was unable to respond. This whole situation was more than surreal. A couple of tears trickled free from my eyes.

  “Hey. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you again. Here. I’ve got some tissues somewhere.” He fumbled along the counter top trying to locate them.

  Swinging back into his position in front of me, he tenderly dabbed at my cheeks with the newly located tissues.

  “I’m not close enough,” he said, and slid from the counter, stepping near, so near.

  “I’m not crying anymore,” I breathed, unsure of how my voice would sound. His face was so close to mine, that I could feel his breath on my lips. What was he doing?

  “I know,” he whispered.

  “Then why are—”

  His lips lightly brushed against mine.

  I didn’t move. I didn’t dare to even breathe.

  Alex didn’t move either.

  It was as if an eternity past whilst we remained frozen in place, but eventually he slowly moved away. His eyes never left mine and he pushed himself back into his seated position on the counter.

  I stared at him, still feeling the softness of his lips against mine.

  “Sorry,” he said.

  I couldn’t take my eyes off him. Had Alex Denton just kissed me?

  “You definitely need whiskey now.” He picked the bottle up and proceeded to half fill the two glasses.

  “Trying to get me drunk?” I questioned.

  He handed me one of the glasses.

  “It’s all part of my interrogation technique I’m afraid.”

  He placed the glass against his lips and tipped his head back, downing the liquid in one go.

  Banging the empty glass on the counter, he turned his attention to me. “Down in one, Ella. Then wait for the burn.”

  I stared at the dark amber liquid in my glass. I wasn’t convinced that drinking whiskey would cure my shock, but then again, what would? I lifted the glass to my nose, and coughed as the strong fumes hit me. I’d never tasted whiskey before and, from the smell of it, I didn’t think this would be something I’d ever repeat.

  Alex was watching me, a smirk pulling at his mouth as he waited. Doing as he’d done, I rested the glass against my lips, tipped my head back, and swallowed the amber liquid.

  My throat started to burn, and I coughed. Alex laughed.

  “Shit. That’s vile!” I complained as he took the glass from me.

  “The next one will taste better,” he promised.

  “No, no more!” I continued coughing as the liquid continued to burn my throat.

  “I didn’t mean today. Good grief, you’ll be fired if you’re drunk on set.”

  He poured another glass of the amber liquid for himself. “I, on the other hand, cannot be fired. Cheers!” He raised his glass.

  He swallowed the whiskey, reached for the bottle again, and then looked at me.

  “Better not have any more if I’m driving you home tonight.”

  “You could always get the bus with me,” I suggested, conjuring up the image of him sitting next to piss lady.

  “Fuck, no way. I can’t use public transport. It’d be a nightmare.”

  I grinned at his expression. “Well then, you could let me drive your car.”

  “Oh no, never in a million years. She’s my pride and joy. No-one’s allowed to drive her apart from me.”

  I shook my head at his typical reaction. All men were the same. They never trusted a woman driving their cars.

  We both sat looking at each other as our laughing subsided. I was puzzled by the changes I’d seen in him this morning, and had to remind myself about why I was allowing myself to even talk to him after yesterday. He’d apologised, and that meant a lot. But something else was bugging me now.

  “Alex?” I asked, pushing myself out of my comfort zone. “Why did you just kiss me?”

  “I told you. It’s part of my interrogation technique. I was softening you up for my questions.” He grinned at my confusion. “I suspect I know the answer to this, and believe me, I don’t want to put you in any awkward positions.” He paused. “Well, maybe I do, but not in this sense anyway.”

  I frowned, God this man was a huge and difficult puzzle to w
ork out.

  “What do you know about Amy and me, and how did you find out about it?” he asked. There was no sign of hostility coming from him, and considering how easily he fired up, I was reassured by his calmness. But I remained silent. I couldn’t tell him that Rowan had spilled the beans about everything. He’d fire me on the spot, and I didn’t want to be thrown off my work experience on my second day.

  Alex cocked his head and tapped his lips with his finger. “Crisp Muncher told you, didn’t he?”

  I didn’t respond.

  “Ella, I think that because you’re not denying it, it means that it was him that spilled the beans. Did he tell you everything, the full story?”

  I couldn’t pretend any longer. “Yes, but only because I asked him.”

  “You asked him? What on earth did you ask him?”

  “I asked him why you and Amy behaved the way you do. I couldn’t understand how you two could have ever had a relationship together. And you . . . well, you were both horrible to me.”

  Alex leaned forward. “So, what did he tell you?”

  “That you were in love with Amy,” I said, growing increasingly uncomfortable with what I was saying.

  He sighed. “Go on.”

  “And that she started seeing Simon behind your back. It was quite a while before you found out about it. Then you had to pretend to be together for the sake of the second film. It’s all so unfair Alex. You got all the shit from the media about your behaviour when it was her who should have been picked on.”

  I glanced at his expression, concerned about how he would react to what I had said. To my surprise, he chuckled.

  “Oh, Ella. You have a lot to learn about the media and the way it works. Unfair was the least of my worries.”

  I frowned, but he didn’t expand.

  “She’s the reason you behave how you do, isn’t she?”

  “Who? Amy? Well yes, to some degree. I can’t stand her, but it’s more to do with what she did, rather than the person she’s become. We were both young when we starred in the first film. I thought I was in love with her, but I wasn’t. She was a cow doing what she did behind my back, but you know what? I got over it. I had to.”

  I took a deep breath, stood up and stepped toward him.

  “I don’t believe any of what you’ve just said. And I don’t think you do either. She hurt you, she broke your heart. And all this anger is your way of not letting anyone get close to you. I hate to see you like this, you deserve so much more.”