Tainted

by Cyndi Goodgame

  I couldn’t help but glance at the ground. The two of us were standing on a balcony like a symbolic ode to my ironic ridden life. And yet this type of conversation was my main reason for loving the book, not the death part. “I didn’t read it for the death part, but for the avid attention he gave her from the start.”

  Call me cheeky, but it got the reaction I wanted.

  “Alright! Dreamy-like though. And I’m catching your hint whether you think I am or not. Poe and his logic then if we’re analyzing literature. Always powerful in love and protection and grieving, but always ends in death. I see a theme sprouting.”

  We were no longer in a destroyed room amidst a problem I caused, but in our own little world of discussion with specified intentions to thwart the other into understanding the opposite sex. Arms crossed and gripping the bottoms of my sleeves, I wanted a sarcastic comeback but couldn’t think of one.

  “Human writers tend to exaggerate the drama of it all,” he said.

  “Yet both were men who wrote them.”

  “Still, not everything ends in death.”

  “Perhaps we humans like to dwell in the fantasies of those who we can’t fathom existing.” I enjoyed saying this.

  “Changing the subject? We are speaking of just humans. Right?”

  “Why are you telling me all this?”

  “Because I want to be sure you know that us…what we have must not end in death. I won’t lose you, Grace!”

  My heart stopped. Hadn’t we just been just so angry with one another and now the anger deflated and tears were leaking like a faucet down my face. The Ian tunnel vision effect was in full swing. He raced across the balcony to hold me. “Why would you say all that? Just to make me angry?” I choked.

  “Not to make you angry, to make you see what has to happen next. You can’t keep endangering yourself by throwing yourself into the fire. Coming here without me was just…well, not the right thing to do. Don’t make me poison myself because I lost you. You have to be more careful with my heart too.”

  I didn’t want to speak and say any blubbery girl like mushy stuff. He was mushy enough right now.

  “Puhlease?” He mocked my usual sassy voice. He even rolled his eyes and put his hand on his hip in a mocking attempt to make fun of me.

  “Okay!” I wiped my eyes and nose of flowing liquids. I thought of his perpetual obsession with my safety. I’ll try, but I will keep who I want safe too.

  He kept his eyes on mine. One eyebrow rose signaling my face or mind spoke for me.

  Rats! “I thought you couldn’t read my mind all the time.”

  “She speaks, yet says nothing. What of that?”

  “Stolen words! Quoting my favorites will not make the grade.”

  “I couldn’t read your mind just then, Grace! What were you thinking?”

  I furrowed my brow.

  “Ahh, her eye discourses; I will answer it. I can only read thy mind when high emotions are present.”

  “Stop the Shakespeare!” I smiled hoping he’d see I did not really want him too. “I will try my best to keep you safe too. Today I did. That’s what I can promise you. You are mine to protect also.” I expected his man pride to step in.

  He was not satisfied. “Then promise me you won’t hide anything from me because I might get hurt and you intend to damsel me into being saved. No, I don’t want to fail you, but more important to me is you stay unscathed and remain the perfect vision you are to me. Let me attain the scars of battle.”

  “Okay, together! First, I don’t know of any of your scars but one...so I am willing to investigate. Trade out..” I let that get a reaction I wanted. Score! “Second, fine with me on the not letting me in battle so long as you know that I can defend myself a little more now and getting better at my skills so I’m not some helpless throne warmer. And third, I will return the unfortunate favor of what I will not hide from you. Kin and I had a conversation today.”

  He stiffened.

  “He says not to let you or Pike hinder me anymore and that you’re holding me back from my full potential. Do you have any idea what he might mean?”

  His eyes said he did. He thought carefully by the way he hesitated, “Perhaps. But I still don’t feel you are ready for the challenge of what his big mouth expels. If you will hold out a little longer, I will give in to your ploys and teach you another one of your many talents.”

  “How do you know my talents and I not?”

  His eyes rose, “Son of the Seelie court queen knows what his queen can do. And you, my lady, are capable of double I am told.”

  “By who?” My eyes were wide with interest, his filled with fear. I’ve heard that monarch butterflies fly to South America for the winter. My stomach must have flown with them because I feel like I’m about to dry heave.

  “Altheon.”

  “Figures,” I sneered.

  “Why the malice?”

  “He knows much and tells nothing.”

  “As is his job as seer. And all the more trusted because he only reveals in due time. A seer who sets the court off course endangers us all.”

  This is understandable. “Okay.” But all three of these dudes have alluded to this great power that me, the almighty Grace, would have and I would know it one way or another.

  He kissed me gently on the cheek and looked down at the balcony railing that was holding us up. He stayed there long enough for me to hold my breath and curve into him. I sighed audibly.

  “Of thy tongue’s uttering, yet I know the sound.”

  “Stop that!” I tugged my arm on his jacket.

  “Never! It makes you swoon, my fair lady.”

  “Not any more, lover boy.”

  “Keep dreaming!”

  “I know you can’t.”

  “Ah, but you will.” He pointed to me putting a gentle finger out to poke my stomach in fun. I saw the scratch on his hand. My mark on him, Altheon said. I chuckled to myself and unnoticeably relaxed my legs dismayed he could sense the butterflies going ninety to nothing.

  He could make me do that. As much of a fool he was acting like, he could do that. He inched his mouth towards my ear in the quickness of his movement but I caught his seduction act and ran through the balcony door.

  “One more thing. Kin said something. He called you two, you and Pike, prince thieves. Why is that?”

  He shrugged, “Yet another way we have wronged him. I continue to steal you away, my queen. He sees you as his and his only. But that simply won’t do.”

  I sighed thinking I’m very thankful to be saved once again. How awful that would be to finally be caught by Kin. I shuddered at the thought remembering the promise I made.

  “Cold?” he turned his head sideways.

  I nodded a no, not wanting to share my worries with him. I’d vowed that I wouldn’t give any extra anxieties over to him concerning me and failed partly today.

  “Time to get you out of here, my queen,” he announced my title more than once today. I fathomed that was a claim on me in some way, but didn’t ask. He gestured towards the stairs but I turned and asked, “Do you mind if I get a few extra things from my room.”

  He nodded looking at the black bra.

  I had a thought. A scary one! “Did you come to my balcony all those years while I was…in here?”

  From across the room he looked at the balcony door, my bed, me. “I’ve never been in your room before today other than when Kin got in here. And I had Miss Dan draw the curtains tight, every night, so no one could disturb you. No telling what might be out lurking out there.” He shivered dramatically, but it didn’t go over well coming from a very masculine figure like himself.

  I smiled at his humor and blushed bright cherry red lip stick red while staring at my shoes. “So you never saw me…”

  “No, Grace. Give me more credit than that. And we better get downstairs before your mother starts to wonder if I really am stealing your virtue.”

  “Oh!” More blushing. I can’t believe I’m getting m
arried to this guy. And not just any guy. The one I’ve wanted my whole life. It was so weird to stand in my leftover teenage years bedroom and say that. Granted, it won’t be for a while, but still. I thought about what it meant to possibly be married so young, but I decided that finding out one was half human, a Seelie court fairy queen, and finally getting to be with the person I pictured spending the rest of my life with, it must be more than okay.

  He told me he’d meet me downstairs. I’d managed to find an old shoulder bag to store all the memorabilia clothes, treasures and memories stashed inside along with the black bra that kept seeping back into my mind. When I made it down with my packed bags, my mom was lying on the sofa, safe, caught up to what I did and why. My dad was asleep. He wouldn’t remember any of it. I walked up to my mom not sure of what to say. “I miss you still.” I wasn’t allowed to touch her. She had to stay away.

  My mom watched me with careful precision as if categorizing all of me before I left her again. She was woozy by my own damage to our home. “You look radiant.”

  I don’t feel radiant.

  “Yes, you do because you survived. Kin lost today.”

  My eyes went wide. “I forget you can hear my thoughts.” I looked at Ian who was sulking and surely jealous. He hated that everyone else could unless he could push the sudden emotional roller coaster with the only push button to turn them on.

  “I could all those years.”

  “Mom! That is truly a very embarrassing bit of information to keep being reminded of.”

  “What, I was a teenager once too. And I know that Ian is a gentleman. Your hormones were the ones I worried about!”

  She was a menace. “Thanks mom. Can we get back to saving you now? I’ve got places to go, people to save.” I wasn’t fooling my mom, though.

  “Grace, I’m proud of you.”

  I didn’t want to talk right now, but it still was nice to hear.

  “Thanks. I needed that. Will you let me come back one day soon and just talk again?” Not about my hormones though. Are you getting that loud and clear, mom?

  “Loud and clear sweetheart. And I’d love that.”

  “Will dad be okay?” I looked at him. He was lying back in the recliner like he would be on any other Saturday morning. He would never know that strange creatures roamed his house, firework residue was cleaned off the kitchen floor, and his daughter was whisked away from the “bad fairies” who were trying to kidnap and/or kill her too. I sighed.

  My mom looked over at my dad. She was now sitting and feeling better from the blast for the Fey healed fast. I hadn’t come to terms yet that my mother was Fey.

  “He’ll be fine. I’ve protected him always. He found your letter yesterday. Your father is far older and far wiser than you think and will come to terms with this.”

  I realized the irony of that whole statement. I looked over my shoulder at Ian and knew he realized what I was thinking without reading my mind.

  “Yes, you did, protect father well and I know that’s what I have to do to keep Ian protected as well. I will do my best to keep you both safe. Staying away helps that more than anything. I know that now.”

  “I love you!”

  “I love you too, mom.” I turned to go, but stopped. “Mom, would you do something for me?”

  “Anything?” she stood now all healed with one hand on her hip like she was ready for a battle again. Oh, mom!

  “Will you bake a pan of cookies for Ian and me just because, well, because I miss them, and you.” My mom’s smile was bigger than I’d seen it in years.

  “Already promised. How about Ian and you come by once and while and have cookies with mom, say at least once a month. Ian, is that okay?”

  I knew she was asking about the safety of it. He wasn’t sure, but it was worth a try in my eyes. He knew neither of us would give up trying, and I knew he really didn’t want us too.

  “Sure, for now. Let’s play it by ear.”

  “Come by later tonight and pick them up, Ian. She’ll wake up tomorrow with cookies for breakfast.”

  “Nutritious mom!”

  “But yummy!”

  “Didn’t lose your sarcasm or humor I see.”

  “Never will.”

  Ian stood beside me with a silence that said it was time to go.

  “Do I get an invite to the wedding?” my mom said.

  I dropped my mouth with a big round piehole announcing to myself only that I officially just received the biggest shock—ever!

  ”I heard you thinking upstairs and it was only natural since you stayed in the court and didn’t come back home that night. Assumptions were in order.”

  “Um, of course mom.” This is so weird.

  “For me too dear. You’re my daughter. Congratulations.” And Grace, trust Ian. He is the one who holds your heart and you, his. Please don’t lose sight of this.

  “Okay, mom. Agreed! Please don’t read my thoughts. I’m not sure I can handle the future events in my life and live with my mother being able read them.” I was embarrassed at what I was implying but felt I better be clear with her.

  “I understand dear. Point taken. But you’ll have to learn to shield them. They’re not easily blocked from the send-e, just the sender!”

  “Point taken.” Oh my. I will have to get control before I get married. I can’t have the whole court listening in.

  Ian was surely figuring out my thought patterns even without reading it. I talked too freely with my mom therefore allowing him access in some small way to my mind. To reassure him of what I was thinking and to embarrass me royally mom said, “There are safeguards for the queen and her own private quarters especially for your wedding night. You will be well guarded.”

  “MOM!” I glanced at Ian. He was grinning way to wide and chest puffed with machoism. Men!

  “Mom, I have to go.” I wanted to hug, kiss her cheek, something. But I couldn’t. “I love you,” she repeated hopelessly.

  “I love you too.”

  “Oh, mom,” and I ducked my head around looking at the kitchen, “do you have a bag of marshmallows?”

  She smiled and returned a minute later with a brand new bag of white puffy giant marshmallows. Despite the day’s events, I was ecstatic.

  “What will happen to my house?” I asked for my mom’s benefit. It was then that I remembered Pike stood in the corner. Ugh! He heard everything. Another man listening to details that might involve me and any said man on my wedding night was just cruelly mangled torture. He wasn’t smiling though but rather looked way down in the gutter dumps. I started to feel bad for him more than angry. And he no doubt was reading me now because he put on his game face and smiled. Grrr! Go rot somewhere else Pike.

  What is that for?

  Listening only gives you grief. You should stop punishing yourself.

  He shrugged off the wall and left slamming the door. Ian only watched him then looked my way with probably a good guess or reading Pike’s sweet thoughts.

  Ian walked up behind and slid his body against the back of me cradling my arms in his, “No worry. The menehune will repair the house as it was. They’re very good at what they do.” This was interesting behavior in front of my mom. PDA overdrive.

  “Remind me again who and what the me-ne-hoo-he are?”

  His smile twitched up on one side and then his gaze grew distant, “They are a people who live in the deep forests and hide from the Fey as much as the human eye. I have a friend of a friend who made an ally of the blacksmith and always owes a debt. They build. They’re counterparts are located around the world and take on many names as do our people. Time changes all. But once a faithful servant to another, all ties in time remain unless broken otherwise.”

  “Like the debt thing?”

  “Yes, Grace. Like the debt thing.” That same twitchy smile surfaced.

  Satisfied, I grabbed his hand in mine and walked away, happier. But the edge of my mind ignored the words on the wind reminding me of a debt to a darker prince repeating
over and over, “Spend a day with me…one day… twenty four hours.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  audacious- a. showing a willingness to take bold risks

  The next morning, a plate of cookies was lying beside my bed and I panicked that Ian came in here while I was sleeping.

  “No, my dear. Not on my watch. He is allowed only when properly needed. He gave them to me to put there for you.” Danella was cross with me for thinking she might have failed at her job. Since finding out that Danella was also Miss Dan from growing up, I had come to confide in the only real friend I had other than Ian. At least, one I could tell secrets too.

  “Up already. Eat your cookies if you will.” I heard her mumble, “Some breakfast!”

  I bit into one and put it back. “Will you put them up for me and save them for the trampoline tonight? I want to surprise Ian.”

  Danella smiled. She loved being sneaky unless it was me doing something dangerous in her eyes. “Yes, Miss Grace.”

  I shifted back into the bed. “No, Miss Grace. You are expected on the firing range, then breakfast, afterward a meeting with the guards and Master Ian, and…”

  “And what…” I folded my arms while lying down in defiance. I just wanted to lie down and close my eyes for, I don’t know, another twenty-four hours. I was so tired lately.

  “And a picnic at noon meal in the garden.” Danella probed the area like someone might actually hear her, leaned in, and said, “It’s a secret. No one but me knows. That’s why you have to come back here after the meeting so I can ready you, sneak you there, and the rest of it, I’ll get ready.”

  “You are such a sneak. Ian has you eating out of the palm of his hand.” Forget napping.

  “And you don’t?” Her implications were acknowledged with a nod by me.

  “For sure.”

  I went to the firing range. Bane, Ian’s right hand man, kept an eye on me I noticed after appearing too suddenly and only watching me. He was ever the boss man’s friend. I shot over fifty arrows just to release some tension of the three prince dilemma and no Ian to interfere. I kept looking back over my shoulder for Ian wondering why I was called and not met.