Crave (Splendor Book 2)

by Janet Nissenson

  “Maybe,” she replied noncommittally. “I’ve tried the pill before and had some awful reactions, but maybe there’s another choice we can explore.”

  “We’ll discuss this at greater length when I get home,” declared Ian. “Now, I want you to promise me you’re not going to mope about the rest of the weekend, hmm?”

  “I promise. I might go out for a walk after I eat something and get dressed. And I’m hoping to feel well enough to go to yoga tomorrow. Julia called me yesterday and said to call her if I decide to go. She’ll pick me up and we’ll meet Nathan for breakfast after class.”

  “I think that’s a marvelous idea, love,” he told her encouragingly. “Provided you’re feeling up to it, of course. You’ve been alone too much in your life, Tessa. It’s good for you to get out, make friends, have fun. Just as long,” he added sternly “as you’re not having this fun with other men.”

  Tessa’s voice was filled with emotion as she replied, “You know that could never happen. You’re the only man I’m interested in being with, Ian. Besides, you’ve totally spoiled me now for other men. No one else could even try to compare.”

  He chuckled, but couldn’t help feeling immensely pleased at her words. “I’m glad to hear it, love. Needless to say, it’s exactly the same for me.”

  They talked for more than half an hour, Ian being determined to make it up to her for the brief, rushed conversations they’d had up until now. He felt horrid that he hadn’t paid enough attention to her this past week, hadn’t realized how sad and depressed she’d sounded, and he vowed to make it all up to her. Perhaps another very romantic weekend getaway at one of his hotels - somewhere warm and sunny this time, like Palm Springs or Laguna Niguel. He would devote himself exclusively to her pleasure, pampering her even more than he’d done in Lake Tahoe last weekend, and make very, very sure she knew exactly how much she was loved. She was everything to him, and he wouldn’t ever let another day go by when she wasn’t fully, thoroughly aware of that fact.

  ***

  San Francisco

  Tessa slid beneath the covers of her lumpy double bed reluctantly, even while knowing that her alarm would go off far too early for her liking in the morning, and that she shouldn’t stay awake even five minutes longer. And she was being silly, she scolded herself, by thinking that the longer she delayed her bedtime the closer it would bring her to the hour of Ian’s arrival. His flight from London was due in less than twenty four hours from now, and she’d literally been checking off the days on her calendar for the past week. She missed him desperately, the twice daily phone calls they had shared - along with a barrage of texts and emails - no real substitute for seeing him in the flesh. But the long, lonely days without him would finally be coming to an end tomorrow evening, and Tessa was determined to never endure another lengthy separation like this again.

  She’d finished her letter of resignation a few days ago, but was waiting for Ian’s return before handing it over to Andrew. Tessa knew that her supervisor would try to talk her out of it, would even do his best to make her feel guilty about resigning, and that she would have to strengthen her resolve and not give in to him. However, if Ian was correct in his assumptions, then perhaps Andrew would surmise the real reason behind her resignation and leave well enough alone. She was keeping her fingers crossed that it would be the latter, for she wasn’t at all sure she could hold her own against her very formidable supervisor.

  She burrowed her face into the pillow, thankful that she wouldn’t be sleeping on this uncomfortable mattress too much longer. During Ian’s two week absence, she’d made good progress on cleaning up the apartment, getting rid of things that were bordering on junk, and setting aside some others that she intended to donate to charity. One advantage of living in a tiny apartment meant that you didn’t have a whole lot of stuff, so that moving wouldn’t be much of an effort. When she officially moved into Ian’s house at the end of the month, she would only be bringing along her clothes, toiletries, laptop, and a few personal items like books, CD’s, and photos.

  Tessa smiled sleepily as she imagined Ian looking disdainfully through her belongings, probably insisting that she toss out some of her older articles of clothing – especially the despised raincoat. He had already made some comment about the age and condition of her laptop, and she knew without being told that he was making plans to replace it with a brand new, top of the line model - just as he’d done with her cell phone. And she also knew that no matter how much she might protest about not needing more clothing or jewelry or things, that it would all fall on deaf ears so far as Ian was concerned. He wasn’t a man used to being told no, and once he made up his mind about something - well, that was simply the way it was going to be.

  She fell asleep very quickly after that, though her slumber was short-lived. It was a combination of sounds and smells that woke her abruptly – the piercing beep of all three of the apartment’s smoke detectors; the frantic pounding at her front door; and, most terrifying of all, the unmistakable, acrid scent of smoke.

  Tessa flung back the bedcovers and raced frantically for the front door, far too panic stricken to even think about grabbing her purse or phone or a pair of shoes. Smoke was already beginning to fill the apartment, and she had barely opened the door when a burly firefighter grabbed her none too gently by the arm and hustled her down the stairs to the street below. Once there another firefighter shooed her across the street where other tenants were beginning to gather, all of them watching in horrified shock as the flames seemed to move at an accelerated speed to engulf more and more of the apartment building.

  She was in total shock, still half-asleep, and she wondered wildly if this was some awful nightmare she had yet to wake from. But it was too real, too vivid, to be a dream, she realized in dismay. Her apartment, along with all of her belongings, was going up in flames before her very eyes, and she was powerless – utterly powerless – to do anything about it. Even the fact that she was barefoot and clothed only in a rather skimpy pair of sleep shorts and an equally insubstantial tank top didn’t phase her. And despite the heat being given off by the wicked flames, Tessa felt frozen, in both body and mind.

  She lost all sense of time, of awareness, too immersed in shock to notice the sobs and shrieks of the other tenants, or to pay much attention to what the emergency personnel were saying. After a time, someone arrived to lead all of the displaced tenants down the street a couple of blocks to a Chinese restaurant that she’d eaten at a few times. From what she was able to surmise through the fog that had enveloped her brain, the owners had agreed to let the Red Cross use their place as a command center of sorts, handing out food and water and blankets as they tried to calm everyone down and begin making temporary housing arrangements for them.

  Tessa refused soup or hot tea or a bottle of water, but did accept a folded-up space blanket to wrap around her inadequately clothed body. The chaos all around only served to pull her even deeper into a near-catatonic state of shock, and she padded on bare feet to the farthest corner of the restaurant to try and get away from all theconfusion. She huddled into a chair, wrapping the blanket around herself, and tried desperately to stop her uncontrollable shaking. She felt like crying, or screaming, like some of the others were doing, but was too numb to summon up the effort it would take.

  And as she continued to sit there - miserable, terrified, and frozen - she wished with all her might that Ian was beside her at this very moment. He would make it all go away, she consoled herself, would make everything better. But he was still in London, half a world away, and until he returned she had only herself to depend on.

  ‘Just like old times,’ she thought tiredly.

  ***

  By his calculations, he’d been awake for more than twenty-four hours, given the time zone difference and the number of hours he’d been either waiting in airports or actually in flight. Ian was exhausted, especially since he’d had precious little sleep on the very long flight home from London. Since he had changed his fl
ight at practically the last minute, there hadn’t been any seats available in either first or business class, and he’d been forced to fly coach. For a man of his height and bulk, falling asleep in the restricted space had been all but impossible, especially when coupled with the crying child in the seat behind him, and the very chatty couple in front of him. He’d considered the wisdom of taking this last minute flight a dozen times over during the rather hellish journey, but each time he questioned his decision he didn’t regret it. How could he, when it meant he would see his beloved Tessa that much sooner than planned?

  Wanting to surprise her with his early arrival, he hadn’t told her about his change in plans. He’d made up some excuse for why he wouldn’t be able to call her as usual this evening, and she sweetly hadn’t questioned him further. But now that his flight - the departure having been delayed by more than two bloody hours due to heavy fog at Heathrow - had finally landed, he was making a beeline to her apartment, so that he could sweep her up and take her home with him. He knew she wouldn’t mind being woken at this late hour, even though she would have to get up early for work in the morning. And he’d already written off the possibility of actually having sex with her, since his own exhaustion would probably impair his ability to perform, even given their long separation and how damned much he’d missed her.

  A quick glance at his phone showed that it was actually already morning, half past midnight to be exact. As he exited the plane and walked towards baggage claim, he hit the speed dial for Tessa’s cell phone. He knew she kept it by her bedside to use as an alarm, and was therefore concerned when it went to voicemail after several rings. Frowning, he tried it three more times in quick succession with the same result.

  As he located the number for her landline, he tried not to panic, telling himself that perhaps she’d simply forgotten to charge her cell phone. But when the landline also went to voicemail repeated times, he couldn’t control his agitation, and the dreadful feeling that something was wrong. After all, didn’t Tessa always claim that bad things happened to her on Wednesdays? And though it was barely the next day, it was in fact a Wednesday.

  Ian was relieved and grateful to find Simon waiting just outside of the terminal, and left the luggage for his chauffeur to handle as he got inside the car. He tried both of Tessa’s numbers again, and this time didn’t even attempt to control his panic.

  “Something’s very wrong,” he told Simon as the older man slid behind the wheel. “Tessa isn’t answering either of her phones. She hasn’t been in touch with you, has she?”

  Simon shook his head as he pulled away from the terminal. “No, sir. Haven’t seen or heard from the young lady since the day you left town. When did you speak with her last?”

  “Last night. A text or two earlier today. Or was it yesterday? I’m so bloody mixed up with these damned time zones that I don’t even know what day it is. Christ, Simon, where is she? Why isn’t she answering the phone?” Ian raked a hand through his already rumpled hair.

  “I’m headed directly to Miss Lockwood’s place now, sir,” assured Simon calmly. “Would you like me to call my contact at the police department during the drive to see if they’re aware of anything, ah, amiss in her area?”

  Ian closed his eyes, not wanting to imagine any one of a dozen horrible things that could have happened to Tessa - being robbed, raped, stabbed, God knew what else in that questionable neighborhood she lived in. “Yes, please, Simon. And thanks, mate.”

  While Simon made his call, Ian tried like hell not to overreact. There could be a perfectly logical explanation as to why Tessa wasn’t answering either of her phone lines. There could be a power failure in the area, which would account for why her landline wasn’t working, and why she hadn’t been able to charge her cell phone. Or maybe there had been some sort of gas or water main leak in the neighborhood, and all of the residents had had to be evacuated temporarily. Or just perhaps -

  “Sir.” Simon’s voice intruded on his thoughts and then Ian was listening in horror at what his chauffeur was very reluctantly telling him. “I’m afraid Miss Lockwood’s apartment building - well, there’s been a fire, Mr. Gregson.”

  ***

  The scene surrounding the two block radius near Tessa’s apartment building was utter and complete chaos. Ian pushed his way past barricades, completely ignoring the shouts of the police officers who had undoubtedly been told to keep all but essential personnel out of the area. He didn’t give a flying fuck if a dozen strong men tried to make him leave - no one was going to prevent him from finding Tessa.

  He and Simon had smelled the thick, acrid smoke in the air blocks away, could see the flashing lights and beacons of all the emergency vehicles. Simon had been able to obtain some additional information from his contact at the police department - the man evidently was both a neighbor and a fishing crony - but the data hadn’t helped ease Ian’s fears in the least. There were no casualties reported, at least not yet, but several residents of the building had been taken to the hospital. Initial reports indicated that the fire had started on the uppermost floor of the building - the fifth - while Tessa’s unit was on the second. It was that bit of news that gave Ian the most hope that she’d found her way out of the building unharmed, but nothing was going to fully appease him until he found her.

  A task which was going to be a near impossibility from the looks of it. There were emergency vehicles parked haphazardly all along the street - fire trucks, police cars, ambulances - and dozens of people running to and fro, shouting at each other, with no one person seemingly in charge of controlling the scene. The fire was still burning, filling the air with thick black smoke, and the heat from the flames was stifling.

  A young Asian policewoman made a rather feeble attempt to get Ian to vacate the area. “Sir, you really can’t be here, I’m afraid,” she told him, trying to sound authoritative. “Emergency personnel only. You’ll have to leave this area at once.”

  He shook his head. “Not until I find someone. I’m looking for a young woman, mid-twenties, tall, blonde hair. Have you seen anyone fitting that description?”

  “Sir, I really have to insist -”

  “Please.” He turned the full measure of his charm on the pretty young policewoman. “Please, officer, I’m desperate to find her. Do you have any idea where they took the people who had to be evacuated?”

  The policewoman hesitated before giving a slight nod. “I’m not positive, but I thought I overheard someone saying they were taking the residents into the Chinese restaurant down the street. You can check there, but then you’ve really got to leave.”

  Ian gave her a dazzling smile. “Thank you, officer. I truly appreciate it.”

  And then he was off, running as fast as his weary, jet-lagged body would move, trying to stay out of sight before another emergency responder noticed him and tried to get him to leave.

  Ian was not an especially spiritual man, but he offered up every prayer he could remember from his youth as he hurried along. The very thought that Tessa could be injured, or worse, was not something he could bear to think about. If he were to lose her now, when they’d really just found each other, he wasn’t sure he’d want to go on living either.

  The Chinese restaurant in question was closer to two blocks away than one, he realized as he walked inside the dimly lit establishment. Inside, the chaos continued, as the victims of the fire seemed to be either shouting or crying, and speaking in at least half a dozen different languages. A couple of individuals carrying clipboards with Red Cross badges clipped to their collars were bustling about, attempting to calm as many people as they could. Ian considered approaching one of them to see if they knew if Tessa was here, then gave up and went to look for her himself.

  He’d very nearly given up, the despair he felt sapping the little energy he had left, when he finally spotted her.

  She was sitting by herself at a little corner table, her hair wildly tangled, and her face streaked with tears and soot. Someone, presumably the Red Cro
ss, had given her one of those ultra-light space blankets, which she was huddled inside of, her body shivering with cold or more likely fear. Beneath the unsubstantial blanket, she wore only a pair of sleep shorts and a flimsy tank top, and her feet - Jesus - her feet were bare and dirty. She looked so forlorn and terrified that he wanted to weep. Instead, he pushed past all the other people milling aimlessly about until he was kneeling in front of her.

  “Thank Christ,” he muttered hoarsely, taking her face between his hands. “God almighty, Tessa, tell me you’re all right.”

  She gasped, her hands drifting up to cover his as the ridiculous excuse for a blanket fell away from her body. “Ian. Oh, my, God, how are you here? How did you find me?” Her voice was hoarse, either from crying or smoke inhalation.

  He stood and lifted her into his arms, letting the blanket fall to the floor as he cradled her against his chest. “I’ll always find you, my love. Now, let’s get you out of this place and take you home.”

  He carried her out of the restaurant, managing somehow to dig his phone out and pressthe speed dial for Simon’s number. The chauffeur answered on the first ring.

  “I’ve got her, mate. Yes, unharmed so far as I can tell. Meet us on the southwest corner of the block, past the barricades. Be there shortly.”

  He stuck the phone back in his pocket and hefted her a bit higher in his arms, scarcely noticing her weight. He would have gladly carried her for miles, crawled through the actual fire, or walked over broken glass, just as long as she was safe.

  “Ian,” she murmured huskily. “Put me down. I’m too heavy for you to carry.”

  “Hush, darling. It’s no bother at all, and you are not walking a step on these filthy sidewalks in bare feet. Ah, there’s Simon.”

  Faithful, devoted Simon was standing anxiously by the side of the car as they arrived, holding the back door open.

  “Give Miss Lockwood to me, sir, while you get inside,” offered Simon. “I’ve left a blanket on the back seat.”