Royal Rebel

by Jenny Frame

  “Of course I wanted to come. It’s not that.” Lex nervously drummed her steering wheel. “It’s…well this isn’t my first time at one of these charity polo events.”

  “No?” Lex was full of surprises.

  “Yes, my bank hosted a VIP tent at two of the big dates on the polo calendar. This was one of them. I was never near the royal tent of course, but the one my bank organized was flowing with champagne, money, and, for a few of us, cocaine. It makes me nervous coming back here.”

  Roza put a hand on Lex’s thigh and grasped it gently. “I wish you would have told me. I’d never want you to come somewhere that makes you feel uncomfortable.”

  Lex grasped her hand and squeezed. “No, it’s fine. I don’t want you to think I don’t want to be here with you. I do. But it still gives me a sense of fear, facing my past. There were so many people like me there then. Alcoholics, drug addicts, sex addicts, or all three.”

  She understood Lex’s fear. She had been around those types of people ever since she was old enough to drink and party. Rich people who had money and no responsibilities. The excess of that life could eat you up.

  “Listen to me, all you have to be nervous about is meeting my family. The royal tent is what I described to my brother as domestic, from Dowager Queen Adrianna and my aunt, Queen Sofia, down to all the children of the family, plus dogs running and barking all over the place. It might give you a headache, and there will be champagne, but nothing is done to excess there. If anyone gets out of hand, Queen Adrianna gives you a swift smack in the behind with her walking stick.”

  Lex laughed. “Thank you, Princess. You’ve made me feel so much better.”

  “While we’re waiting, could I tell you about the project I’ve been working on?” Roza asked.

  “Your super-secret project?” Lex said in a stage whisper.

  She play-hit Lex in the arm. “Hey, be serious, or I’ll tell Ravn on you.”

  Lex chuckled. “Okay, okay. Go ahead.”

  “I was thinking about Summer and what was important in her little life. To her being a fairy-tale princess is a dream that she loves to play out, whereas other children might want to play at being the warrior king, a footballer, a movie star, things like that. You know?”

  “Uh-huh, go on.”

  Roza turned around in her seat, and became animated. “Well why don’t we give them their dreams? Someone like Summer could have a day of being a princess at Windsor Castle, little James, her friend who talks nonstop about football, we can get him involved in playing with his favourite team in a friendly match, things like that. I’ve made the phone calls, I’ve costed the days, the food, the drink, everything. What do you think?”

  Lex’s impassive look soon changed to a broad smile. “Well done, you’ve really listened to what I’ve tried to teach you. It’s a wonderful idea.”

  “So is it something we can make happen?” Roza asked.

  “If I check out the financials on your report and they all work out like you say, you can have the budget and set this up as a part of Timmy’s charity, and you can be its patron.”

  Roza was so happy she squealed and just about threw herself onto Lex’s lap. “Thank you, Lex. It’s going to be so much fun. Something that’s my own, something I can be proud of.” Roza placed kisses all over her face, just as the line of cars started to move.

  “Hey, you’re going to shock the security guards.”

  Roza sat back in her own seat, and giggled. “I don’t care. I’m happy.”

  Lex took her hand and said seriously, “You’ve done well, Princess. I’m proud of you, and your family will be proud of you.”

  “That would make a first,” Roza joked.

  “Well they’re going to know all about it. First thing Monday, we’ll make plans for a launch for…What do you want to call this programme?”

  Roza had come up with this name almost as soon as the idea. “The Dreams and Wishes Foundation. What do you think?”

  “It’s perfect.”

  *

  Bea felt a wave of dizziness and clutched the chair beside her. The royal tent was hot and stuffy inside, and she hadn’t been feeling her best today.

  “Are you all right, sweetheart?” Sarah, her mother, was sitting beside her and clearly noticed her swoon.

  “I’m fine, Mum. Just a little bit out of sorts. I think I need to cool down.”

  Sarah took her hand, and looked concerned. “You’re working so hard, Bea. You need to slow down a bit.”

  “I’ve got to, Mum. It’s my job. I’ll go and get a drink and ask them to turn down the temperature.”

  She walked to the back of the tent where staff manned the food and drinks tables. A young footman bowed and asked, “What can I get you, Your Majesty?”

  “Could I get a glass of iced water, please, Sam?”

  “Of course, ma’am.”

  While Bea waited, she gazed around the massive tent which was much more of a grand enclosure. This was a big family affair. Everyone was either a relative or friend and the atmosphere was relaxed. Royal nephews, nieces, and grandchildren ran around playing. Lali, Greta, Riley, and Holly had joined them for the day.

  The dogs yapped and ran around playing, all except Shadow, Baxter, and Rex, who were standing by her dad, Reg, who was a bit of a Pied Piper when it came to dogs. Reg was chatting with George’s uncle, the Duke of Bransford. They had struck up a friendship soon after they had met. Uncle Bran was an enthusiastic horticulturalist and farmer, and Reg had visited his estate many times to help him with planning improvements. Now that Reg was retired, it was wonderful for Bea to see him keep an interest in his first love.

  “Here’s your drink, ma’am.”

  “Sam, could you get them to make the temperature cooler?” Bea asked.

  “Right away, ma’am.”

  She took a drink, and the cool liquid instantly made her feel less wobbly on her feet, but she still felt queasy. Maybe I need to eat.

  Thoughts of her own ailments fell away as George strode confidently into the tent. She had been taking some of the children to see the horses. She had one of Viscount Anglesey’s little girls up on her shoulders, and Greta and Riley’s little boy, Charlie, by the hand.

  Since her cousin Julian’s betrayal, George had made a concerted effort to heal the family and bring his wife and children back into the fold, and separate them from their father’s dishonour, while he spent his days in a secure facility.

  Luckily, unlike their father, they loved their cousin George, as did Greta’s children. It meant so much to Bea that the whole royal family were bringing her friends and family close. She watched George lift little Elizabeth from her shoulders and give her a kiss before the girl ran off with Charlie.

  Bea felt like she would melt on the spot. George looked both so attractive and adorable at the same time. Something about her polo team uniform of white jeans and thick brown belt, brown leather riding boots, and the Windsor team jersey emphasized her tall, powerful form. But that powerful form was softened by the gentle way she interacting with the children.

  God, I want to have your children. She looked down and realized she had been rubbing her stomach as she thought that.

  “It can’t be. It’s too soon,” she muttered to herself. Bea shook her thought away and watched George stop to say a word to Cammy, who was standing with Lali. Then George stopped for a word with Bea’s mum, but something Sarah said made George frown. She immediately set off toward Bea at a fast pace.

  George took Bea into her arms. “Are you okay? Your mother said you were dizzy.”

  Bea laid her head on George’s chest, allowing her to hug her. “I’m fine.”

  George sighed. Bea had been working so hard lately, and she never complained but George had seen the tiredness in her eyes. Her wife had always had an uncompromising work ethic, but since becoming Consort, she had worked relentlessly.

  It would have been hard enough to get used to the pace of royal engagements, but Bea had taken on the p
atronage of an enormous number of new charities. Deep down George believed that Bea felt a slight sense of guilt about the great privilege she now enjoyed. She needed a rest, and fortunately they would be going to Balmoral for their holidays in a month’s time, and she would make sure Bea rested and was well taken care of.

  George tightened her hold on Bea and kissed her sweet-smelling hair. “You said you were fine this morning when you felt sick.”

  “It’s just too hot in here, and I probably need to eat. Sam is going to make sure the climate control is made cooler.”

  “But—”

  Bea pushed away slightly and gave her the mischievous, sexy look that made her skin hot. “Do you know how delicious you look in this uniform?”

  “You’re just trying to change the subject…oh God.” She groaned as her wife’s hand slid under her polo shirt and her nails scratched across her stomach, and the fire was lit inside her. “God, don’t do that, when I can’t do anything about it,” George said.

  Bea chuckled and whispered, “I want you in this uniform. I want to go down on my knees, open up your belt, and—”

  “Oh no, no, no. I’m not listening. No more, or I’m going to explode.” George could see the entire scene play out in her head and she simply couldn’t let Bea finish that thought.

  “Okay. I’ll stop, as long as you promise to wear this for me tonight,” Bea said, looking far too pleased with herself.

  “Anything you want, my darling. I am yours to do with as you please, Your Majesty.” George took her wife’s glass of ice water from the table and took a large gulp. “You’re right, it is too hot in here.”

  Bea looked over her shoulder and smiled. “Oh, look, Roza’s arrived. Remember, don’t be all intimidating to Lex. Be good.”

  George watched Bea walk off with a gentle sway to her hips, which mesmerized her. She winds me up so tightly and expects me to be good?

  *

  Lex felt the collar of her shirt grow ever tighter as the cool gaze of Queen Georgina fell on her. Roza was currently receiving a hug of welcome from the Queen Consort, while she stood awkwardly behind.

  She could feel many pairs of eyes on her as she waited. Perri was sitting beside the elder ladies of the Buckingham family, and she was sure she was the topic of conversation as Perri gazed over at her. Everyone here was very protective of Roza, and that was a good thing, but nerve-racking if you were the one walking into the lion’s den.

  Bea greeted Lex like an old friend and introduced her to George, who gave her an overly firm handshake.

  “Pleased to meet you, Your Majesty,” Lex said.

  “Likewise, Lex. I understand from my wife that you and Roza are doing great things at Timmy’s.”

  “I’m only doing my job, ma’am, but Roza is doing wonderful things. She’s keen to learn and has come up with her own charity programme.”

  “We make a good team,” Roza added.

  Lex saw the Queen’s gaze fall on their clasped hands. It would have been obvious to anyone there was more than just friendship going on.

  George was just about to say something more when Theo popped his head into the tent and shouted, “George, we’re up.”

  “Coming,” George replied to him, then looked Lex in the eye. “I’ll find some time to talk to you later, I hope.”

  “I’m at your service, ma’am,” Lex replied.

  George shook her hand again and pulled her in close. “Be very careful with my cousin, Lex. I am extremely protective of her.”

  “Of course, ma’am,” Lex said.

  George kissed her wife goodbye and left the tent, and Lex let out a breath.

  Bea giggled and joked, “Don’t worry, Lex, I won’t let her chop off your head.”

  Great. She could imagine how much more protective they’d be if they knew about her past. She wondered if Bea had already told the Queen.

  *

  George and Theo cantered around the playing field, while Lex, Roza, the Consort, and her friends sat on lounge chairs at the side, enjoying a picnic.

  Lex topped up Roza’s fizzy apple juice from the bottle in the picnic basket and said, “Are you sure you don’t want champagne, Princess? I don’t mind if you drink around me. I’m okay with it.”

  Roza leaned over and kissed her cheek. “No, I don’t want to bring those things around you, and I don’t need them when I’m with you.”

  Lex’s heart gave a happy sigh. Roza was everything she’d ever dreamed about. “Okay. Whatever you want.”

  All the friends started to cheer when George passed the ball to a teammate who then went on to score a goal.

  “Oh God,” Holly said to her friends. “If only I had known how gorgeous these polo players were, I’d have come a lot sooner. Who was that Adonis who scored? Number four? He fills out his uniform so well.”

  “Holls, you find so many nice men and never give them a second date. You’re breaking hearts all over London,” Bea joked.

  Holly pointed at herself and feigned innocence. “No way. I’m just choosy. I want to find my perfect Mr. Right.”

  Bea rolled her eyes. “Of course you are. Cammy, do we know who number four is?”

  Cammy had the biggest smile on her face. “I do indeed. That is Captain Quincy. She served with Her Majesty and me in the Royal Navy.”

  Everyone burst out laughing and Holly looked perplexed.

  “Maybe that’s where you’ve gone wrong—maybe you need to look for Ms. Right,” Bea joked.

  Holly stuck her tongue out and said, “Very funny.”

  Lex felt Roza shiver. “Are you cold?”

  “It’s a bit chilly, but I don’t want to miss George and Theo,” Roza said.

  Lex got up and brushed her suit down from the blades of grass on it. “I’ll go and get your shrug from the car. I’ll just be five minutes.”

  As Lex walked out of the Royal Enclosure area, she heard someone shout her name. She turned around and her heart sank. Lula Ambrose. Someone from her days as an addict, who had worked as a PA at her investment bank,

  “Lex! It’s you.” By the level of her voice, the sway of her walk, and the drink in her hand, she clearly hadn’t given up any of the addictions they had shared.

  Lex looked around nervously as everyone around them stared. “Lula, how are you?”

  When Lula got close she threw her arms around Lex, spilling the champagne down Lex’s jacket.

  “Shit, be careful, Lula.”

  “Is that all you have to say to me? I haven’t seen you in so long, Lex. Remember how much fun we used to have?”

  Everyone was really looking at them now. All she needed was for Roza to see Lula hanging all over her. “What are you doing all the way over here? The bank’s VIP tent is on the other side.”

  Lula pointed to her nose and sniffed. “I had to meet someone to make a little purchase, you know what I mean?”

  Lex knew exactly what she meant. They had done cocaine together here, often enough. Now she cursed her luck that she would meet Lula of all people here.

  “I’m lost now, Lex. I can’t find my way back.”

  Lex weighed up her options. She didn’t want anyone who could report back to Roza to see her like this, so she took Lula by the hand and set off to take her back herself.

  “Where are we going, Lex?”

  “I’m taking you back.” Lex led her through the lines of horseboxes to the other side of the grounds.

  Lula went from giggling to whining the whole way. At one point she stopped dead. “Lex, let’s have some fun like we used to.”

  The memories of doing drugs and having sex in a semipublic place flooded back to her. The memory was horrible, and yet in her weakest moments she still craved that darkness.

  Lex’s moment of hesitation allowed Lula to push her up against one of the trailers, and she kissed her.

  Lex pushed her off, but that just made Lula more determined. She looped her arms around her neck. “Come on, Lex. You know you want it.” Lula pulled out a bag of whit
e powder and waved it in front of her. “Let’s have some fun.”

  “I don’t do drugs any more, Lula. I’ve been clean for six years.”

  Lula just laughed at her and said, “You know that’ll never last. I’ve tried too, but you and I are the same. We always want that instant thrill.”

  Lex felt paralysed with fear. Fear that she wasn’t strong enough, not good enough. When she thought back to everyone in the royal tent looking at her questioningly, inside her demons were telling her she’d never be good enough, she would never be good enough for Roza.

  Lula pressed the bag against her lips. “You can almost taste it, can’t you? Almost feel the rush? Nothing feels better.”

  Lex groaned and she closed her eyes. She could feel it, taste it. Nothing felt better…Then she saw Roza in her mind saying, I’m so proud of you.

  She remembered the feel of her lips as she kissed her, and found her control. She grabbed Lula, turned her back against the trailer. “No, I don’t want this. I’m clean and that’s the way I’m going to stay. I know something that feels better, and she’s waiting for me back over there.”

  When she turned to point back over to the playing field she saw Roza standing at the end of the line of horseboxes, looking shocked, and with tears rolling down her cheeks. She looked back at the way she was standing with Lula pushed up against the trailer, and her stomach sank.

  I’ve fucked up everything.

  She let go of Lula and started towards Roza, but Roza turned on her heel and ran off.

  “Roza! I didn’t…” She let the sentence die on her lips. What was the point? She was never going to be more than a drug addict.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Lex chased after her, but all hope deserted her when she saw Ravn escorting a distraught looking Roza into the state car. Once she was in safely, Ravn stared back at Lex with a look of disgust and disappointment.

  Once they left, Lex wandered slowly back to her car, craving everything that was toxic to her. Her mind kept saying, One drink won’t hurt, just one.

  Lex got into the driver’s seat and held her head in her hands. This was why she told Vic she shouldn’t fall in love, or become involved with anyone. She was always one stressful situation away from a drink or a hit.