The Pledge

by Chandra Sparks Taylor

  “Okay,” I said slowly.

  “I told you there was one girl trying to get with me, but really there were two, and, well, the truth is, I slept with them both.”

  I sat there stunned.

  “The one I didn’t tell you about told me she was eighteen, but I just found out today she’s fifteen.”

  “And how did you find this out?” I asked quietly.

  He took a deep breath. “Her family is pressing charges. I’m being accused of assault and statutory rape.”

  If I hadn’t been sitting down, I would have passed out. “What did you just say?” I asked, trying to take it all in.

  He held my hand. “Baby, I promise you I thought that girl was eighteen.”

  I snatched my hand back and walked away. “Would you have told me if she wasn’t filing a lawsuit?”

  He shook his head. “Courtland, don’t do this. We’ve been through it before. We were broken up. It’s not like I cheated on you.”

  I didn’t know what to say, so I just walked away. I thought about going to cheerleading practice, but I really didn’t feel like it, so I packed up my stuff and caught the bus home. When I walked through the door, Momma was there watching the news and I saw Allen’s face flash across the screen.

  She just looked at me with tears streaming down her face. “Please tell me he didn’t do it,” she said.

  I just sat down and joined her, and we watched the news story about Allen’s accuser filing a lawsuit and watched footage of him being arrested at school. It must have happened right after I left. The girl and her family were holding a press conference. Allen sleeping with her was bad enough, but it hurt even worse when I saw she was white—or at least I thought she was white. Her face had been blurred out because she was underage, but they showed close-ups of the bruises on her arms.

  After it was done, Momma just shook her head. “I don’t believe a word of it. That girl knows Allen is about to be a star, and she’s trying to get a piece of his money. Look at her. Why would he be with her when he’s got you? There’s no comparison.”

  “You’re just saying that because you’re my momma. You have to say that,” I said. “My own daddy doesn’t even want to hang around me.”

  “Oh, baby, it’s okay,” Momma said, hugging me. “Your daddy loves you. He just has a hard time showing it. Allen loves you, too. I know he didn’t do this.”

  “Momma, he slept with her,” I said. “He told me this afternoon.”

  Momma didn’t know what to say, so she just held me while I cried. When I was finally done, she said, “We need to pray.” She didn’t wait for my response as she grabbed my hands and offered a heartfelt prayer. Once she was done, she squeezed my hands. “Everything’s going to be just fine,” she said.

  I nodded, but I didn’t really believe her.

  Later that night, Aunt Dani came over. It felt like I hadn’t seen her in months because she said she had been spending a lot of time with Miles, the basketball coach Allen had introduced her to, and she had gotten an apartment near Ross Bridge in Hoover. Whenever I talked to her, she sounded really happy, and she said things were getting really serious with them.

  She looked different, too. She had on low-rider jeans and a simple top—as simple as a top could be for Aunt Dani—and some really nice boots. Her hair was done in a stylish bob. From what I could tell, there was no weave in it.

  She walked over to me and gave me a hug. “How are you, Corky?” she asked.

  Her words just made me cry, and when I pulled back, she looked angry. “I can’t believe what this boy has done. Have you talked to him?”

  I nodded.

  “Well, what did he say?”

  I told her about my conversation with Allen, and she just seemed to get madder. “I’ll call him and talk to him. This is ridiculous,” she said.

  I shook my head. “Just leave it alone, Aunt Dani,” I said.

  “I won’t leave it alone. He hurt you. He’s not going to get away with it.”

  “I’m not going to give you his number,” I said. I saw the old Loretta Danielle Dennis emerging, the one who could be extremely ghetto, and it wasn’t going to be pretty.

  “Girl, I still have his number from when he hooked me up with Miles.” She must have seen the look of terror on my face. “If it makes you feel any better, I’ll take Miles along with me. Allen needs to know he can’t hurt you.”

  I thought about skipping school the next day, but Momma wouldn’t let me. She told me I had done nothing wrong, and that I had nothing to be ashamed of.

  After Momma dropped me off, I seriously thought about waiting until she drove off and ducking around the back of the school, but Bree spotted me.

  Before I could say anything, she wrapped me in a tight hug. “Everything’s going to be fine,” she said. “I’ve got your back. I was at that party, and I’ll testify for Allen. She didn’t come until right before I left, but that girl was all over him and a few of the other basketball players.”

  I just nodded. When I looked up, Nathaniel was staring at me. He walked over and gave me a hug, too.

  “How are you?” he asked.

  I felt like I was about to cry again, so I just nodded.

  “Good,” he said. “You’re going to be fine.”

  My friends surrounded me on either side, and we headed into the school. It was like all conversations stopped as I walked down the hall. I knew everybody was talking about me, but that didn’t make me feel as bad as thinking that everyone was feeling sorry for me.

  “You’re here today,” my teammate Rene White said the moment she spotted me.

  I wasn’t in the mood for her negativity, so I ignored her.

  When Candy came up and asked me if I was okay, I started crying. Although part of me believed she was sincere, another part of me wanted to believe she was laughing at me in my face because she had warned me about Allen. When she tried to touch my hand, I moved back.

  “Leave me alone,” I said, glaring at her. “You’re probably happy this happened.”

  She nodded slowly. “I understand if you don’t want to talk to me,” she said. “Believe me when I tell you that I wouldn’t wish what you’re going through on my worst enemy. I’ll keep you and Allen in my prayers.” Even though I didn’t want her to, she reached over and hugged me.

  The day didn’t get much better. People just kept staring at me. It was all so weird. I was used to attention, but I hadn’t experienced the negative kind since middle school. Finally I decided to skip cheerleading practice and went home and got in the bed.

  A week later, not much had changed. I was thankful we were out for Christmas break so I didn’t have to deal with all the kids at school.

  I woke up on my birthday, which happened to also be Christmas Day, and tried to get excited. I was finally seventeen. I had been waiting for this day my whole life, yet I couldn’t be with the one I wanted to share it with. I tried to pretend I didn’t feel anything for Allen, but I couldn’t just turn off my feelings like a faucet.

  I went through the routine of opening my Christmas presents, and as my parents always did, they gave me my birthday present separately. A lot of people born on or near Christmas have to share their gifts, but my momma always made sure that I felt as though Christmas was my day.

  I hadn’t really asked for anything special for my birthday, since the only thing I really wanted to do was date, so I didn’t know what to expect.

  When I opened the small box, it took a second for it to register that I was staring at a car key. My momma smiled at me from behind the video camera she was holding, and I jumped up and screamed.

  “Is this what I think it is?” I yelled.

  “Why don’t you go look in the driveway and find out?” Momma said.

  I tore out of the house with Cory close behind me and stopped when I spotted the Toyota Tercel in the driveway. It looked like it was about ten years old, and it definitely wasn’t what I pictured myself driving, but once I laid my eyes on it, I fel
l in love. I had my own car!

  Momma, Cory and I climbed in. Daddy just stood there looking at his watch, so I decided to ignore him.

  We drove around the block, and when we got back, Daddy’s car was gone.

  “Thank you, Momma,” I said, throwing my arms around her.

  She gave me a huge smile. I don’t remember ever seeing her look that happy. “You’re welcome, baby.” She looked at me. “Do you really like it?”

  “I love it,” I said, really meaning it.

  We spent the rest of the day just kind of chilling. Bree called and asked if I wanted to go to the movies later that afternoon. It was starting to get dark, and Momma wouldn’t let me drive. Bree’s mom came and picked me up, and we all stood around admiring my car so long that we were almost late to the movie.

  Bree and I gorged ourselves on popcorn and other junk food, and as we sat watching the movie, I wondered why I had stopped hanging out with my best friend.

  “That was fun,” Bree said as we were leaving the theater.

  “Yeah. We have to start hanging out again,” I said.

  She nodded.

  “So tell me about this guy you’ve been seeing,” I said as we stood waiting on my mother.

  “I really like him,” Bree said, getting this look in her eyes I had never seen before.

  “Really? I couldn’t tell,” I said sarcastically.

  We both started laughing.

  “So have you heard from Allen?” she asked me.

  “No,” I said, kicking a rock on the ground. “He’s out of jail, but I heard he’s getting homeschooled for a while.”

  “Don’t take this the wrong way, but do you think it’s true what they’re saying about him assaulting and raping that girl?”

  I hesitated, and Bree quickly said, “I’m sorry I asked that. I know I told you I’d testify for him, but the more I’ve been thinking about it, maybe he did do it. I didn’t want to upset you, but he was trying to hook up with that girl.”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s okay. You’re my girl, so you’re probably the only one who could ask me that.” I took a deep breath. “Do you promise you won’t tell anyone what I’m about to say?”

  Bree nodded. “You know I would never tell anyone what we talk about.”

  “He said they slept together, but he denied putting his hands on her.” I hesitated. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I actually wouldn’t be surprised if he did assault her. I’m not saying that he did,” I rushed to say, “but a couple of times I’ve seen this side of him that I didn’t like.”

  “What do you mean?” Bree asked.

  I hesitated again, and Bree grabbed my hand and squeezed. “It’s okay. You can tell me,” she said.

  I felt myself welling up. “He put his hands on me—twice,” I said softly, and Bree tightened her grip.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked.

  I couldn’t even look at her I was so embarrassed. “Because I was afraid. I kept telling myself that he was sorry and didn’t mean it, but…”

  Bree reached over and gave me a hug. “So what are you going to do about it?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Really?” Bree asked. Her question made me look at her. “Physical pains heal, Courtland, but what has this done to you emotionally? I didn’t want to say anything, but since you’ve started dating Allen, you’ve changed. We don’t hang out anymore, you dress differently…It’s like he’s got this hold over you. I think it might help if you talked to someone. Have you thought about saying something to your mom?”

  I nodded. “I have,” I said, “but…”

  “But what?” Bree asked.

  “She really likes Allen. I don’t know if she’ll believe me.”

  “Of course she’ll believe you,” she said.

  “If you say so.”

  We sat there in silence for a few minutes. I guess we were both absorbing what I had said. I looked at my watch and realized my mom was about thirty minutes late, which wasn’t like her at all, especially when she had to pick me up at night.

  I pulled out my phone and called her on her cell, but it went straight to voice mail, which meant she didn’t have it on. I called the house, but the phone just rang and rang until finally voice mail picked up.

  We waited a little while longer, and when she still hadn’t shown up, Bree called her mom, who came and got us. I was starting to get a little worried, but I tried not to let it show. When we got to our block, police cars and ambulances were everywhere, and we couldn’t get through. That’s when I really started to get scared.

  Before Bree’s mother could stop me, I jumped out of the car and ran down the street, praying that the flashing lights were at one of my neighbors’ houses. I made it to my front yard just as EMT workers were rolling a stretcher with a body bag from the house. When I saw it, I lost it. I had seen enough movies and TV shows to know someone was dead, but I wasn’t sure who.

  I felt someone grab me, and I looked up to see my mother. She looked really scared, which scared me even more.

  “Momma,” I said, running into her arms.

  She grabbed me and squeezed me so tight I thought she was going to crush my ribs. “I’m okay,” she said, rubbing my hair.

  I realized if she was standing there that only left two other possibilities. I searched her face. “Where’s Cory?” I asked.

  Her face crumbled, and I started crying even harder. “She’s—”

  I couldn’t even make myself say the word.

  She shook her head. “No, baby. She’s okay.” She pointed to a police car, and Cory was sitting in the back. I ran over to the car and threw open the door, then grabbed my little sister in a hug. When Cory saw me, she burst into tears.

  “It was awful, Courtland,” she said.

  “What happened?” I asked, trying to make sense of all that was going on.

  I held her to me, like I had done so many times before. “It’s okay,” I said softly, rubbing her hair.

  I watched as the EMT workers rolled out a stretcher with my daddy on it. His shoulder was wrapped up, and there was blood on the sheets. I felt sorry for him, and I wondered if he was going to be okay.

  “What happened?” I whispered to my sister.

  She just shook her head and cried harder, then started talking so fast I could barely understand her. “It was horrible,” she said. “I had just fallen asleep when I heard voices outside. I thought it was Momma and Daddy at first, but then there was this strange sound downstairs, so I went to see what it was and someone was walking out the back door. I started screaming, and Mommy and Daddy came running. The guy pulled a gun on Daddy, and Momma jumped in and tried to help. The guy shot at Daddy, but he missed. When he tried to shoot again, I knocked the gun out of his hand, then Daddy grabbed it and shot him.” Cory broke down and started crying.

  I stood there holding my sister, watching as Daddy sat up on the stretcher, refusing medical help. He walked over to a few of his friends who I recognized from the police force. He said something to them, then shook their hands. Most of them got in their patrol cars and left, but a few stayed around checking our house and looking around the neighborhood for evidence. Daddy came over to Momma, who had walked over to check on us. He hugged Momma, and for the first time in a while, I saw that he really cared about her.

  He walked over to us. “You kids okay?”

  I just nodded, then I turned to look at my sister, who was still upset.

  “Am I going to jail?” she asked.

  Daddy walked over to her and smoothed her hair. “No,” he said. “We’ll have to go down to the station and answer some questions, but me killing him was self-defense. You saved my life. You okay?”

  There was something different about the way he was talking and looking at Cory. Normally he never really looked at either of us. I guess almost losing Momma and Cory was a wake-up call. I hoped it would last.

  nine

  The next couple of days were crazy as we tried
to piece together all that had happened at our home. It turned out the guy who had broken in was someone Daddy had arrested a few years earlier, and the officers weren’t sure if he was trying to get revenge or if it was a random break-in. He had brought someone else with him, but the other person had gotten away with some of our stuff, including some of our Christmas gifts, my purity necklace, which I’d forgotten to wear, some money Momma kept in the house for emergencies and Cory’s beloved Sony PSP, although I didn’t know why anyone besides us would want those things. I shuddered every time I thought about what would have happened if Cory hadn’t woken up.

  My little sister was still pretty traumatized by the whole thing. We were out of school for another week for Christmas break, and I was glad. Between what had happened at our house, which had made the news, and all that was going on with Allen, I didn’t want to be bothered.

  Cory and I spent most of our time playing video games. She had gotten a Nintendo Wii for Christmas, which hadn’t been taken since it was in her room, and we would spend hours playing. I wanted to get more details of what had happened that night, but Momma told me not to force Cory to talk about it. She felt Cory would open up to the counselor Momma had gotten for her when she was ready.

  The one good thing to come from the situation was that Daddy was home more, and he was actually interacting with us. The Sunday after the break-in he was dressed before we were and he went to church with us. Usually he was what Momma called a CME saint—the only time he went to church was Christmas, Mother’s Day and Easter. I still didn’t really trust him, but I admitted to myself it was nice having him around and taking an interest in us.

  Aunt Dani talked Momma into a girls-only day with me and Cory, so the four of us went out to lunch at Johnny Rockets, a hamburger place near the Galleria. I was probably more excited than I should be. I figured the change of scenery would do us all good.

  When Aunt Dani pulled up at our house, I didn’t realize it was her at first. She was driving a Honda Accord, and although it was nice, it just didn’t seem like something she would drive.

  “Where’s your car?” I asked the minute she walked over. Cory and I had been shooting hoops while we waited for her, despite the cold.