Sweet Contradiction

by Peggy Martinez

  “The town whore and the pure preacher’s son? You’ve got to be kidding me.” Beau cackled and then stepped forward within arm’s reach. “Did she already spread her luscious thighs for you, Rev?” he spat. Matt’s arm swung out before any of us saw it coming. Jen gasped just as Beau’s head snapped back and his body hit the pavement like the sack of manure he was. I couldn’t summon a single morsel of concern. Jen’s mouth was hanging open in a fish-out-of-water imitation and Matt was standing there looking three parts angry and one part shocked he’d just knocked a guy out cold.

  “I’ll call you later, Beth,” Matt said after a few moments of stunned silence. His eyes met mine and he waited until I nodded to walk quickly away from the crowd that was gathering around the spectacle we’d just put on. I didn’t blame him. I’d run like hell from anyone who’d put me through this much trouble too. I watched him as he headed toward the open produce market. I was already feeling the loss of his presence. This was exactly what I had been wanting all along, though, I reminded myself.

  “Let’s go home, Jen.” I sighed and rubbed a hand over the tender, already bruising spot on my upper arm. Jen nodded and stepped around Beau’s prone figure to get to my truck.

  My mind was a torrent of thoughts by the time we made it back to the house and I knew I would have to work out the over flow of emotions and feelings so my body would be able to relax by the evening. I helped Jen put away the groceries in silence before asking her the question that had been weighing most heavily on my mind since the scene in the grocery store parking lot.

  “Matt is the son of a Pastor?” I asked as I stacked the can goods in the pantry.

  “Yes. His dad is Pastor Wright of New Hope Community Church just outside of town.” Jen sighed heavily and sat down at the table once all the groceries were put away.

  “And I take it he isn’t like the rebellious, bad boy, cliché preacher kid type?” I knew the answer in my heart to the question, that Matt wasn’t, that he was probably the spittin’ image of his religious daddy. Jen gazed at me, her eyes saying she was sorry and how much she wished I’d had a normal upbringing, that I didn’t have issues with religion in general.

  “He’s a Sunday school teacher. The children in his class adore him. He never misses a Sunday and punching the crap out of Beau, though well deserved, was definitely out of the norm for him.” She let out a shaky breath and searched my face. I stood there for a few minutes, unable to think clearly. Jen had just confirmed everything I’d already figured out, but it was painful to hear said out loud. Matt was completely off my radar and I had to back the hell away from having anything to do with him.

  “Please say something.”

  I clenched my jaw and met her worried gaze. “It’s fine.” I waved a hand and walked over and opened the back door.

  “What are you doing?” she asked quietly.

  “I’m going to work in the garden. I need some time to process everything.” I smiled what I hoped was a convincing smile and shut the door behind me.

  I threw myself into my work in the back yard. I pulled weeds, pruned back the rose bushes and even built a pretty red brick border around the herb garden. I found myself relaxing, if just a little, as I put all my energy into one of the few things I’d missed when I left the country life. There was nothing quite like burying your hands in the earth, nurturing plants, watching them flourish and bloom all because of your hard work and tender care.

  A few hours later, Jen came outside with an ice cold glass of sweet tea and told me that Matt was on the phone for the third time. I shook my head and sat up on the steps of the back porch to enjoy my tea in the afternoon breeze. I couldn’t talk to him just yet. Jen didn’t say anything, just went inside and left me with my thoughts and the midday sun. When my tea was finished, I grabbed a bucket and filled it with cold, soapy water and began scrubbing the back porch on my hands and knees. My arms began to shake slightly in exhaustion, but I worked relentlessly on getting the back porch spotless.

  Everything I’d been concerned about getting involved with Matt had just quadrupled. It was more than the fact that he broke all my rules for dating … he was a freakin’ preacher’s son. He was so different from my normal dating pattern, that it was ridiculous. Not only that, but he was very involved in his church and religion. I just couldn’t go there. I couldn’t give him the kind of relationship he would be looking for. The perfect girlfriend who would hold his hand and attend services together and plan out their perfect, two-point-five kid family, who would be raised in a tiny town and taught to fear a god who would watch their every move. That they would have to fear committing that magical, elusive thing that could send them to a pit of fire for their transgressions. I clenched my teeth and scrubbed with renewed vigor.

  My mind traveled back to a particularly painful memory from my childhood. I was only twelve at the time, a vulnerable age, going through puberty, my body starting to undergo awkward changes. I’d never forget the day I started my menstrual cycle. Jen had already begun hers and assured me it was normal. Her mother talked with me and gave me a box of personal items, she even took me out for an ice cream to “celebrate”. I, of course, had to tell my mom that evening that I had started.

  I tried to just breeze past the topic, assure her I knew what was happening, and then quickly change the subject. Unfortunately, my mom and dad had to take the opportunity to remind me how my body was changing and that I would have to work extra hard to be more godly and curb my womanly nature to engage in sinful, carnal acts of the flesh. My father made sure I knew that as a woman it would come natural for me to act on my “instincts” and give in to my whorish impulses that could lead me onto a path that would surely lead me straight to the gates of Hell.

  Now that I thought back on that day and so many others like it, I could see why Beau Montgomery pissed me off as much as he did when he spread all those false rumors about me being loose in high school. Part of me was afraid that everything my dad said was true, part of me was scared shitless that I was just as broken and sinful as I was told I was and that I deserved whatever eternal hell I would find at the end of my life. Part of me wished I could have been the perfect, straight-and-narrow daughter my daddy always said he wished he’d had. Instead, he’d gotten me.

  “Wait, she doesn’t want to talk right now … give her a few days.” Jen’s voice sounded panicked from around the side of the house. Matt came striding around the house, his eyes glinting dangerously. A man on a mission. I was still on my hands and knees with suds all around me.

  “Why wouldn’t you take my calls?” Matt demanded. He spoke through clenched teeth and his eyes dared me to say I hadn’t been avoiding talking to him.

  “Tell me right now if you want him gone, Beth, and I’ll throw his country bumpkin behind right off my property!” Jen’s hands were on her hips, her hair was coming loose from her braid, and little wisps were flying all around her head, making her look like a crazed momma hen. She had to be at least six inches shorter than Matt and fifty pounds lighter, but she meant every word she said, even if it were technically impossible for her to follow through. Matt’s brow rose in surprise.

  “It’s okay, Jen. I’ll talk to him.” I sighed. “But, um, thanks for the offer.” She cast one last glare in Matt’s direction before turning to huff back to the front of the house.

  “She can be terrifying,” Matt murmured.

  “You have no idea,” I grumbled.

  “So, I’ll be coming here to pick you up in a few days for our date,” he announced, his eyes never wavering from mine. I shook my head and opened my mouth to reply. “That’s all I was calling about, to make sure you knew when to be ready for our date.”

  “Matt … I just don’t think that is a good idea.” I sat back on my heels, dropped the scrub brush I’d been holding, and wiped my hand on my jean shorts.

  “Why? Because of what happened this morning in town?” he asked, his eyes searching mine. “Because that wasn’t your fault, you know. And I woul
d have done the exact same thing if it had been you, my momma, or any other woman who needed my help.”

  “It’s not just that, Matt. It’s just not going to work between me and you, you have to see that.” I stood up and made my way over to stand in front of him. “You are a good man, I can tell that, but just not the man for me.” A sharp pain of doubt pierced my chest, but I continued on. “I can’t be the person you would need to me to be. I’m not good enough for you.” Matt sighed and lifted his hand to tuck a strand of hair gently behind my ear. I closed my eyes and sucked in a quick breath. Never before had I wanted something so badly.

  “So, let me get this straight,” he whispered hoarsely. “You know me better than I know myself and that means you know you are no good for me.” My eyes opened and I found Matt’s golden eyes glinting in the afternoon sunlight, his jaw clenched in restrained anger.

  “That’s not …” I began.

  “Also, I’m too good for you, meaning if I were a little more … what? A little more dangerous? Maybe unreliable? Selfish? I’d have a chance with you?” he growled.

  “No. You’re perfect,” I soothed. “It’s me. I have … issues. I can’t be the perfect woman you deserve.”

  “I’m not looking for perfect, I’m looking for real. I’m looking for passion and love, Babe.” He leaned forward until his lips grazed my ear lobe, freezing me in place. “Now get your pretty little behind in the house, get some rest and begin planning what you’ll wear on our date like normal women do,” he breathed against my neck. I shivered and stepped back quickly, shaking my head.

  “Matt, I’m not going and that’s final. I’m doing this for both of us.”

  “You’re doing this because you’re scared, Beth, and I understand that. But, I’m not going to let your fears keep us from exploring what we have between us. Besides, I won a bet and I plan on calling it in.” He smiled and pointed to the back door. I put my hand on my hips and arched a brow.

  “I’d hate to make a scene …” he began, his eyes turned towards the sky like he was consulting a higher power. He caught my eyes and I saw only a spark of danger before it was too late. “But … okay!”

  I squealed and tried to evade his arms when he launched himself in my direction. He had the element of surprise on his side, though, and before I knew it, I’d been thrown over his shoulder and popped soundly on the behind. “Stop wiggling, Babe.” He laughed.

  “Matthew Wright! You put me down this instant!” I shouted as he swung open the back door and marched me through the kitchen. Another pop on my behind and I was fuming.

  “This woulda been a whole lot easier if you’d just admit how much you want my bod,” he announced cheerfully as we passed Jen, who was standing in slack-jawed shock with a hand towel thrown over her shoulder.

  “Matt, stop acting like a caveman. Where are you taking me?” I screeched. We were now climbing the stairs to the second floor. My energy had begun to leak out from putting up a fight, all the gardening, and manic scrubbing I’d done.

  “Which one is her room?” Matt asked a now devilishly grinning Jen. I pushed my hair out of my eyes and watched as she pointed out my bedroom—the two timing hussy! Before launching me onto my bed, Matt slapped my behind a third time. I landed on my back, staring up at my ceiling, unable to even summon the strength to make a dignified bounce back.

  “So, you going to get a shower and then behave like a sane person? Or am I going to have to help you with that too?” he asked, his grin telling me how incredibly appealing he found the idea. I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to look as pious as I could, knowing I’d just been treated like a naughty child.

  “I’ll get a shower and I’ll go on your date,” I grumbled. He smiled wickedly and his eyes heated into liquid pools of amber.

  “I’m almost disappointed in that answer,” he murmured huskily. I could feel my cheeks flush from the desire burning from his gaze. “I’ll call you and let you know when I’ll be coming to get you.” I nodded my head and he turned to leave the room.

  “This will never work. We’ll only end up hurting each other,” I whispered softly. Matt stopped with his back to me and his hand on the door handle.

  “I’m willing to take that chance … you’re worth it,” he said without looking at me. I closed my eyes as he left the room. I sure hoped he was right.

  t had been a week since Jen had gone out with Hunter. She seemed so nervous and slightly excited when she left, but when she got back, she just flat out refused to talk about it. She grumbled around saying she was an idiot and that they were too different from each other. Matt had called me every day since he’d been a brute and man handled me into my bedroom. Four days after that incident a large bouquet of daisies showed up at our front door with a note attached. Have you named our purple snake yet? That’s all it said and yet I couldn’t wipe the stupid grin off of my face for the rest of the day.

  The day of reckoning had finally come though, and Matt was calling in his win. I was more nervous than I cared to admit and I only had to shoot Jen a dirty look half a dozen times to get her to stop poking fun at me.

  I stood in front of the mirror and groaned at my reflection. Matt said casual … but there were levels of casual and not knowing where we were going was making me crazed. My jean shorts were good enough for any “casual” situation … I yanked off my Lynyrd Skynyrd tee shirt with a huff and pulled on a lacy, vintage style, dusty rose and cream colored blouse. It had a wide, scooping neckline that would hang a little off one shoulder—making it sexy, but not trashy. I decided against my usual cowboy boots and instead wore a pair of slip on strappy sandals. I added a gold, dangly anklet, pulled my hair up in a soft twist and checked the mirror. I bit my lip and wondered if I should have gone with a skirt instead. I was just about to jerk off my shorts when I heard a knock on the front door down stairs. I took a deep breath and grabbed my boho bag off the bed before heading downstairs.

  Matt was wearing dark blue jeans, a pair of black cowboy boots, and a black and turquoise plaid shirt. His black cowboy hat made my mouth water. Matt was hot and I was suddenly surprised that no local girl had snagged him up yet. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, Matt was staring, his gaze hot and open and Jen was grinning like a proud parent on prom night. I walked over to Matt and smiled shyly.

  “We better go before Jen breaks out a digital camera,” I mock-whispered. Matt took my hand and tingles raced up my arm, causing a giddiness to rush over me.

  “Be good, children. Have her back before too late.” Jen giggled and I rolled my eyes as Matt pulled me through the front door.

  “You’re having too much fun with this.” I hissed over my shoulder. She stuck her tongue out at me and then winked before shutting the door.

  Matt held the door open to the passenger side of his truck for me. I slid in and was suddenly nervous. We drove in easy silence, listening to Matchbox Twenty play softly in the background. We chatted about normal things—light conversation topics, silly, little things. I relaxed after I realized Matt wasn’t going to launch into full out interrogation mode. When we had gone quite a ways out of town and Matt pulled down a dirt road off the main highway, I lifted my brow in question. Matt just beamed over at me. We didn’t go very far before Matt pulled his truck off the side of the road and parked next to an old wooden fence. Matt jumped out of the truck and jogged around to hold my door open for me.

  “What are we doing here?” I asked, perplexed. I glanced around at the miles of country in either direction. Matt shut the door to his truck before going to the back and lifting out a large, old blanket and a huge picnic basket from truck bed. He smiled shyly at me when I stood there speechless. He shrugged and reached for my hand.

  “I thought you’d rather stay out of town and do something outdoors,” he said. I smiled widely and placed my hand in his. His eyes shifted instantly, going from shy and questioning to dark and determined. I swallowed nervously as he led me over to the wooden fence.

  “Up and ove
r, Babe.” He sat the picnic basket down and came over to stand behind me, his hands resting softly on my waist. “Let me give you a boost.” His voice deepened as he whispered in my ear. I grasped the board of the fence with a shaking hand, put a foot on the bottom plank, and then throw my leg over just as Matt gave me a heave-ho up. I made it over with my pride still intact. You can take the girl out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the girl. I beamed over the fence at Matt like I’d just braved bungee jumping. He smiled warmly at me and then handed over the basket and blanket. His long legs swung over the fence gracefully, landing right next to me without any effort. He took the basket in his hand and then twined the fingers of his free hand through mine. The gesture felt so very right just then.

  “Aren’t you worried we’ll get in trouble for trespassing?” I asked as we traipsed across a field and up a pretty steep hill.

  “Nah. I’m allowed on all this land since my family owns it,” he said with a shrug. My jaw dropped and my mouth made a little “o” in surprise. The land was acres upon acres of sprawling, gorgeous fields and tree lined hills. When we crested the hill we’d been climbing, I sucked in a breath through my teeth. A small lake, surrounded by dogwood trees in full bloom, made the view a spectacular sight to behold. I sighed and closed my eyes just as a breeze wafted the scent of the blossoms to my nostrils. It was heavenly. Matt’s eyes were shining as he watched my reaction.

  “Come on, I’m starving.” He pulled me down the hill and over to a lovely spot right next to the lake. We spread out our picnic blanket directly under one of the larger dogwood trees. I felt like a kid on Christmas morning when I shooed Matt’s hands away to unpack the basket he’d brought for us. A bottle of blush colored wine and two wine glasses, A loaf of freshly baked bread, cold cuts and several cheeses, strawberries, blackberries, and a bowl of crisp veggies and ranch dressing. Finally, a beautiful berry parfait packaged in two lovely glass containers. I smiled over at Matt and began making us both a plate. I was enjoying my strawberries after eating more than a girl should on a first date, and watching a flower petal float down from the tree above us when I sensed Matt’s eyes on me.