There was a time in my life Teffy would have made me see red and cry my eyes out at that comment. How little my own mother cared about my wellbeing. About her own safety. Things had changed though. I cared a lot less about her than I had ten years ago. The fact that I still sent money tried to prove otherwise.
The syringes in the sink said I was just an enabler to her drugs. But if she used my money to kill herself, then so be it.
“I’ll send somebody after the holidays for some repair work.”
‘You could just cut me a check,” she puffed on her cigarette.
I narrowed my eyes at her. “I’ll send someone.”
Teffy excused herself to her rooms to change. I took the time to wander down to my old bedroom. Not much had changed. Walls were bare. Bed still in the corner with mismatching blankets. Everything I had wanted I took when I left or was stored in the Hollis basement until I went to New York.
I didn’t know what memories I expected to wash over me. Very few were worth remembering. That’s just not life with Teffy.
I left my mom’s after another hour of very forced mother and daughter conversation. Gloria needed a few more supplies so I ran to Walmart on Christmas Eve for them. It had been so long I thought there would be very few people I would recognize and even fewer who would remember me.
Turning my cart down the baking isle I crashed into another cart. Both myself and the other shopper started to apologize then we both stopped mid-sentence. I was face to face with Janice Delore.
“Krystina.”
“Janice,” I bumbled out. My relationship with my in-laws had always been awkward and a bit uneasy however, my relationship with my mother-in-law had been the best.
“I heard you left the city but I didn’t expect you to move back home.”
“I’m not home. Just a holiday visit. Christmas with Gloria and the Hollis’.”
“James said you went back to Gentry.”
Ah, so she did know about her sons little unexpected visit. “I was visiting the ranch. Working as a horse handler for awhile until I figured out where to go next.”
“Did you decide?”
I laughed. “Not really. Aside from taking the bar I have nothing figured out. So, Christmas at your moms? Did the whole family come?”
“Just me. The boys are on call so it was going to be an empty holiday. I can let James know you say hello if you wish,” Janice was always the optimistic.
“I doubt James cares to hear from me. Our last run ins haven’t been what you would call friendly,” I said starting to creep away.
“I know. What James did, it was extremely wrong, embarrassing as a mother. The doorman at your apartment, he called out of concern once. Out of place of course, should have had him fired for it. I never thought, not my James. Not that he could raise a hand to lady… to his wife. I’m sure whatever it is you’re holding over him now isn’t pleasant and for a mother to know. But I always thought you were the best for him. Even though it was clear to everyone your heart wasn’t there. He always knew I think, knew that you were still in love with Gentry.”
I couldn’t find the words to reply. Instead I hastily grabbed the sugar from next to me, mutter a “Merry Christmas,” and scurried away.
Chapter Forty-Two
Gentry
I drove all night and day. Stopping only late on the 23rd for a few hours at a pet friendly motel. Long enough for a nap and a shower and to like Duke run off a bit of his puppy energy.
It was Christmas Eve and if I kept my time I would make my folks house by late afternoon. None of my family knew I was coming. My mother at least should be happy about my arrival.
Throughout my drive I had thought a lot about what I would say to Krys. She was a lawyer she would expect a strong case as to why she should return to Mirror Lake with me. But I had no fuckin’ clue what I would say.
As my childhood town came into view I thought about turning around. If she turned me down…
I saw Gloria’s SUV outside my parents. I put my truck in park, felt my pockets for all my necessary items and picked up Duke. “Here goes nothing my boy.”
I walked to the front door and knocked once before opening it. The shriek of “Uncle Gent! Uncle Gent!” and the rush of my nephew greeted me.
“Trenton!” I scoped him up in my puppyless arm. “Merry Christmas!”
“We got your presents under the tree. Mom wouldn’t let me open it until Christmas.”
“What a fuddy duddy,” I said sitting him back down. My sad and brother-in-law Damion sat on the couch in front of the TV. Gloria stepped through from the dining room with Mila on her hips.
“Come on Uncle Gent. Aunt Krys is helping bake the cookies!”
The warmth and smell of fresh baked cookies in my mom’s house on Christmas Eve was an all real scent. No candle warmer fakeness here. So many Christmas holidays of the same picture when I was a child. Mom, Gloria and Krystina in the kitchen baking up a storm. I followed Trenton who had now noticed and became infatuated with Duke, into the kitchen.
Krys looked up from where she was decorating sugar cookies. “Look at the puppy Aunt Krys!”
Duke wiggled and yipped at the sight of his mom. “Hi-ya Duke,” she said as she petted him and kissed his head.
“Krys,” I started.
“Not now Gentry,” she said quietly, going back to the reindeer cookie she was making.
“No, now.”
“It’s Christmas Gentry,” Gloria warned in her perfected mother tone.
“Exactly. I have spent days on the road with a non-potty trained puppy to ensure that Krys got everything she left behind.”
“I left a note. I told you I would send for Duke once I was settled.”
“Yeah. What about your paychecks,” I pulled them from my pocket and tossed them on the counter next to her. “And this?” I asked setting her locket on top of them. “Near thirteen years. You had no right to leave it behind.”
“It symbolized something that could no longer be a reality.”
“Then you should have sent it to me when you got married! But you held on to it. On to us!” Krys was fighting back the tears. I could see them cloud her eyes. “And you left me behind.”
“Gentry,” I could hear the protest in her voice.
“No. I spent to many Christmases in this house. Needing you but having to follow your stupid rules. Not this year. I was wrong. I said things I didn’t mean because I was upset but that’s no excuse Krystina. I know you love me and that’s all that matters.”
“No, it’s not,” she shook her head defiantly.
“I forgive you Krys! I was wrong there was nothing to forgive! When you didn’t join me after graduation I was devastated. So broken, everyone knew that but I couldn’t admit it. But I am now. I believe in love and I believe in us. I waited too damn long to lose it all now.”
I pulled the ring from my pocket and got down on one knee. Krys’ tears were falling freely now.
“My Grandpa Sutton gave this to my Grandma almost sixty years ago. Twice before I have come to give it to you. When you graduated and when you were in Boston. Third times a charm. Please Krystina Delouch, please, marry me.”
I could barely breath. I shook visibly. I was in my mothers kitchen proposing to a woman who left me four days before. My family all gathered around, staring at me making a fool of myself.
Krys still clutched her hand over her mouth. I closed my eyes praying she’d say yes. I felt her kneel before me and place her hand on my cheek. I slowly pried my eyes back open.
“Think it will fit?” she asked with a small smile. The pressure lifted from my chest and I started to breathe again.
“Is that a yes?”
Her smile took over her face as she nodded. “Yes. Yes, I’ll marry you.”
I took her hand and slid the ring on her finger. “Perfect fit?”
“Perfect fit.”
Epilogue – Krystina
I couldn’t believe the turn of events my life had t
aken. I stared down at my ring. I took my gloves off frequently to check on it as I worked in the barn. I worried about it constantly and didn’t want to wear it at first. But Gentry was persistent and I was adjusting.
We had been back at the ranch for a week now. Staying at my future in laws through the New Years and making the trek back to the ranch. Back home.
We had fun. Making love in Gentry’s old room. Laughing about how we snuck around as children. We even found time to catch up with some of Gentry’s old ‘cool kid’ crowd while we were in town. It was actually good to be there.
With Mrs. Hollis, or Liz as I was to call her now, there was a lot of filling in on the younger years of our relationship. She stated she had always assumed and was sorry she hadn’t encouraged us. No matter what I would have been welcomed in their home. I guess hind sight always is twenty – twenty.
But still, I was happy to think of what used to be and the love we had and the relationship we nurtured in secrete. We both had come along ways since those two children I looked back on with a smile.
Gloria had pulled out her old wedding plans. Excited to help me plan my real dream wedding to my real Prince Charming.
A truck pulled into the driveway and I looked up and waved at Ed. He was in the process of moving to Carla’s. His idea and something he started before we had made it back.
I had spent the morning making arrangements for the shipping of my New York things. That would be a fight when they arrived. Arranging and combining our two lives. Lucky for Gentry I wasn’t brining it all with me.
“Hello fiancée,” Gentry growled sweetly coming up from behind me and wrapping his arms around me tightly.
“Words still sounding foreign to you?”
“I think they’re growing on me.”
I spun around, stood on my tip toes and kissed him. “Got a lot of work to do. Some crazy ass girl bought a bunch of land,” he said breaking the kiss with a groan.
I punched him in the arm. “I need to be studying tonight. I have some refreshers to do.”
“Brandon’s making a list of people he wants you to sue.”
I rolled my eyes. “So, I have been told.”
“So, no play time tonight?” he pouted
I slid the barn door closed and grinned wickedly. “I’ve got a break coming up. My boss is a real hard ass though, so we better make it quick and quiet.”
Mirror Lake Ranch: Once in a Memory Page 15