by B. B. Hamel
I want to reach for her hand, but I hesitate. “It doesn’t have to be.”
“But it is.” She looks at me, frowning, and I can tell there’s something unspoken in her expression. “Last night scared me.”
“I know. That fucking asshole had it coming though.”
“He did. But he has a lot of power in this town.”
“Fuck his power,” I say, feeling my anger rising. “He doesn’t get to do whatever he wants just because he has money.”
“But he does,” she says. “It’s not right, but he does.”
“I won’t live like that.” I stare at her, not looking away.
“Lucas…”
“No, listen to me. I won’t live that way. I won’t be afraid of some rich assholes just because they have money and think they’re better than everyone else. I won’t do it.”
“I don’t know if we can keep doing this.” She stares right at me, but I can sense the pain in her.
That sentence strikes me right in the chest. It feels like that boot when I was done on the ground last night. I meet her gaze but have to look away for a second.
“If that’s how you feel,” I say, standing.
“Lucas—“
“You don’t have to say anything else.”
“You don’t understand.” She’s on the verge of crying, but I’m angry.
“I’m not like the Carters,” I say to her. “And I won’t let them push us around. You don’t have to be afraid.”
“But I do,” she says simply. She’s holding her tears back now, but I can see them.
“I’ll see you later,” I say to her, and start walking away.
“Lucas!” she says, but I don’t turn back. I know there’s more she wants to say, but I can’t hear it. I feel too angry and torn to have this conversation with her. I know that if I stay there, I might say something I’ll regret. I might admit how I feel and get my heart broken completely.
I hurry to my truck, get in, and start the engine. Mia is still on her porch, watching as I pull away.
I don’t know what the hell that was back there. But I do know that the Carters are behind it somehow. She wants me and I know she’s feeling the same way that I am, even if she keeps backing off.
It’s those fucking Carters. Anger rolls through me again in waves, but I don’t know what I’m going to do.
I’m going to have Mia. That’s all there is to it. Right now she’s afraid, but she can’t deny her feelings forever. I don’t know when or how, but she’ll see this is right. I’ll have her, make her feel things she never imagined.
I’ll break those fucking Carters, and I’ll take the woman that I need.
12
Mia
I don’t know why this can’t be easy.
It’s supposed to be, isn’t it? I meet a hot guy that wants me, is really good with my family, and he seems to want me, too. But of course, since I have the worst luck in the entire world, it’s not that simple at all.
I really felt it last night when Lucas came over to eat dinner with me and my dad. I felt something I never imagined I’d feel, especially not right now when I clearly don’t have time for it.
He was so good with Dad, so, so good. I couldn’t believe it. He didn’t seem uncomfortable at all, didn’t shy away from the reality of the situation. He was helpful, honest, and open, and treated my father like a regular human being instead of like a sick old man.
Sitting on that couch with him, watching television with him and my father felt so incredibly normal and real that it almost overwhelmed me. I couldn’t believe I felt that way just watching TV, but as I sat there I realized that I could see that happening so much more often. I could see him coming into my life and being a real part of it.
That’s the terrifying part. I still can see it, but at soon as we left the living room, it felt like the spell was broken. The reality of our situation came creeping back in and I just kept thinking about Caleb blackmailing me or any number of other things that could destroy our relationship.
Another early morning on the preserve. The sun is rising and it’s getting warm as I finish up my morning hike. Laura is in her office and was in there when I came in this morning, which is unusual. There are a few cars in the lot, some of them pretty nice, and I have to assume that this has to do with the Carters buying the preserve. I hope she’s being strong in there. I want to kick down her door and poke my head in, but I know better than that.
I need to keep my distance as much as possible. Right now, I’m a liability to Laura, at least if I don’t start dating Caleb Carter. The mere thought sends chills of disgust down my spine.
I send Jordan a text, just trying to see how she’s doing and what she’s up to, but I don’t hear back right away. That’s a little unusual, because I know the girl is like always on her phone, but I don’t push it. She works at a Banana Republic as a manager in the mall and she can get pretty busy sometimes, too busy to stare at her phone and respond instantly to every single one of my messages.
I wish I could tell her what’s happening. As I get close to the preserve’s office, I realize that I can’t really talk to anyone about this.
Jordan is friends with the Carters. I don’t think she’ll believe me if I tell her what Caleb said, and even if she does, I can’t be sure she won’t take their side. That thought terrifies me, since I always assumed I was really close with her, but I’m not so sure anymore. I haven’t heard much from her since the night that I left the bar. I apologized to her via text and tried to call, but she never answered her phone, and her text replies were pretty terse.
I’m totally isolated. I can’t tell my family about this, because my father is sick and my sister would flip out. She’d only make it worse. I can’t tell Laura, she’d try and make it worse, too, and I definitely can’t tell Lucas.
I don’t know what he’d do. I’m actually a little afraid of how he’d react if he found out that Caleb is blackmailing me. I got a taste of his temper that night, and I didn’t like what I saw. Even though he had every reason to be angry, and was only doing it to defend me from some pretty awful people, it was still reckless and scary. Even if I did like it a little bit, felt aroused by it, it still scared me.
As I approach the office building, I see a group of men exit from the front entrance. There are four of them, all wearing expensive suits, and I stop dead in my tracks.
The man walking in the center is Caleb’s father. I recognize him instantly. He ran for city council a few years back and sent out hundreds of flyers with his face on them, so he’s basically the most recognizable man in the city now. I think there are still some park benches with his advertisement painted on them.
I watch as the men approach the parking lot. Three of the men get into one car, and Caleb’s father pauses next to the other car. He looks back toward me, and I feel like a deer in headlights as his gaze falls directly on me.
I want to run away, but I can’t move. This is evil, pure evil. This is the guy that wants to destroy everything I care about. This is the man that raised Caleb and Dylan, two of the most disgusting people I’ve ever met.
This is the devil incarnate, and he’s smiling at me.
I take a step backwards, but he’s already coming toward me. The first carload of men starts pulling out, and he waves them on, saying something. They head out and he continues toward me, smiling, and he waves at me.
“Mia Hayes?” he calls out. “Is that you?”
I force myself to smile. My feet feel like lead. My gut turns circles and I want to scream.
“Hi, uh, yes, Mr. Carter. I’m Mia Hayes.”
“Very good. Very nice to meet you.” He stops in front of me and holds his hand out to shake.
I take it, looking him over. He’s tall, about six foot or something like that, with thinning gray hair, sharp brown eyes, and tan skin. His suit looks expensive, and his watch is enormous and probably costs more than my car. His handshake is firm and when I pull my hand back, I feel like I st
ill have slime on my palm.
“This is a beautiful property,” he says to me. “You’re lucky to work here.”
“Everyone in this town is lucky,” I say to him pointedly.
“Well, maybe. Not many people come here though, do they?”
“We get a lot of visitors.” I feel so uncomfortable but Mr. Carter just smiles huge.
“Mia. I can call you that, right?”
“Sure,” I say.
“Good. Mia, call me Dan. I hear that my son is very taken with you.” His eyes light up a little bit, and while his tone seems friendly, I’m absolutely terrified of the man.
“Uh, I don’t know about that,” I say to him, wanting to back away.
He watches me carefully. “Oh, I think you know. You’re a very pretty girl.”
I can’t believe this conversation is happening. It’s horrifying and fucked up on so many levels. Does he actually know about his son blackmailing me?
“Well, it was nice meeting you,” I say, turning to leave.
“Mia.” Dan steps closer to me. “I want you to know that I support my son, no matter what. He can be a little… unusual in his methods, but he gets what he wants, and he’s a winner. Do you understand me?”
I gape at him, at a total loss for words. “Okay,” I manage to sputter at him, in total shock.
“He wants me to buy this place, you know. He’s pushing it hard, and I agree with him. So make this easy on everyone, okay?” He smiles at me. “Have a good day.”
I watch totally dumbfounded as Dan Carter, the most powerful man in the town, turns and walks away.
He knows. Or at least I’m pretty sure he knows. This man, this adult human man, knows that his young son is blackmailing me into being with him. And he’s going along with it.
I’ve never heard of something so fucked up and wrong in my entire life. But it also terrifies me beyond belief. If Caleb has the support of his father, I’m totally screwed.
Numb, I pull out my phone and I call Caleb. I don’t know what I’m going to say to him. Dan Carter’s car pulls out and heads down the road just as Caleb answers.
“I knew I’d hear from you today,” he says.
“Your father was here. I just talked to him.”
“Oh, really?” I can practically hear the glee in his voice and see his stupid smile. I stare up at the trees, at the light through the branches, and I know that I’m at a turning point.
I’m supposed to roll over and take it. Sending his father here and having him talk to me was designed to break me, to make me give in and do what he wants me to do. I’m supposed to be a good little girl and let him have me. I’m supposed to shut up and let him blackmail me.
Instead of that, I feel anger, overwhelming anger.
“I can’t believe your father knows about this,” I say to him. “What kind of messed up family are you?”
He laughs at that. “He doesn’t know the details. But he knows that we’ll destroy you if you don’t do what I want.”
“Caleb. How can you think this is okay? How can an adult do this? I don’t want you.”
I can’t believe I said that. I’m just so angry that I can barely think. I know I should be saying something else, telling him that I’ll roll over and do what he wants, but I can’t. I’m blinded by so much anger right now that I can barely think.
“Maybe,” he says to me. “But that doesn’t really matter to me right now. I’ll grow on you, I just need you to do the right thing.”
“The right thing would be for you to leave me alone. This is insane. You can’t just destroy this place because I won’t date you.”
“I can’t?” He chuckles softly. “I think you’re wrong about that, actually. I’m better than normal people, Mia. If you’re with me, I can take care of everything you’d ever need.”
“I’d rather puke in my own mouth,” I say to him then hang up the phone.
I’m sweating, shaking, my heart hammering. I feel like I might throw up. The world goes a little fuzzy around me as tears spring into my eyes, but I ball my fists and refuse to freaking cry.
I can’t believe I just told him off like that. I feel so freaking stupid. Even if I’m going to refuse him, I can’t do it like that. I have to be smart about this, because he really is dangerous. I can’t call him up, yell at him, and then hang up on him. That’s just stupid and not tactful at all.
But I’m so angry and disgusted by these people. I can’t believe a grown man would stoop to these games and actually help his son in blackmailing a woman. That’s the lowest, most despicable thing I can imagine, and it truly makes me sick.
The whole situation is fucked beyond belief, and now I’m terrified that I’ve made it worse. I lean up against a tree and wonder what Lucas would do if he were in my position. He’d probably just hunt down Caleb and beat him up until Caleb left him alone. He’d probably approve of that stupid phone call too, actually, now that I think about it.
That brings a little smile to my face. Lucas would have loved hearing me give Caleb shit like that. Even if it’s stupid and reckless, at least I was being honest and standing up for myself.
I stand up and take a deep breath. I get myself under control after a couple minutes and head back down to the office.
I don’t know what’s going to happen, and it was probably dumb to call Caleb like that, but at least it felt good to tell him off. At least I stood up for myself.
Lucas would be proud. And it’s scary how good that thought makes me feel.
13
Lucas
I don’t hear from Mia at all the next day, and that doesn’t surprise me.
There’s something that I don’t know. That has to be the case. She wouldn’t just cast me off like that, not after we had such a good time with her dad, and especially not after we kissed. I know she feels the same way that I do, but what I don’t understand is why she’s trying to deny it.
It was like she was a different person out on the porch. I can’t stop thinking about it all day at work. It’s not like me to obsess about a woman like this, not at all. I’m normally the one that fucks them and leaves them, rarely giving women more than a night. Aside from my ex, I never got into serious relationships, because I never needed to.
I hate feeling like this. I hate wondering what she’s thinking and being unable to find out. I know I can’t call or text her or show up at her work, not at this point. Maybe I can try again in a few days, but I need to give her some space, let her breathe a little bit, let her start to realize that I’m a fucking damn good man and that she needs me.
Because she’ll realize it. Sooner or later, she’ll think back to the way I made her feel when I kissed her and she’ll know that she made a mistake. It’s just a matter of time.
I close up the flower shop at the end of the day and meet Alice back at home. Noah is in a good mood and I scoop him up into my arms, holding him and making him laugh. For a few minutes, I can forget about my troubles with Mia.
Even Alice hasn’t mentioned it all day, which is amazing to me. She’s been bugging me about Mia Hayes, excited out of her mind that I might be seeing someone. But today it’s like she senses what happened between me and Mia yesterday, and she hasn’t said a word.
I put Noah down and let him scoot over to his toys. He smashes them together, laughing and playing, and I watch him, losing myself in the moment. I don’t let myself dwell too much on Mia or the Carters or anything else.
A knock at the door pulls me from my good mood.
“You expecting something?” Alice asks from the kitchen.
“Nope,” I say.
“Can you get it? I’m cooking.”
“Sure.” I stand up and scoop Noah into my arms. “Come on, little man. Did you order something from Amazon?”
I walk over to the front door and pull it open. I stop dead in my tracks, surprised as hell to see Mia standing there, looking a little sheepish.
“Hey,” I say to her.
“Hey,” she says
. “I, uh, I brought some dinner.” She holds up a takeout bag. “Hope you like Chinese.”
I grin at her. “Love it.”
“I just wanted to say sorry. For yesterday, on the porch. I’m just…” She trails off, looking at the ground.
“It’s okay,” I say. “Forget it.”
She looks up and smiles. “Is this Noah?”
“It sure is. Noah, say hi.”
He makes a little baby noise and Mia laughs. “You are so cute,” she says. “Can I hold him?”
“Sure,” I say, taking the bag of Chinese takeout and handing him off.
Mia takes him like a pro and laughs a little bit. Noah seems totally comfortable, which is a little unusual. Normally he’s crying for either me or Alice as soon as someone else takes him, but for some reason he doesn’t seem to mind Mia one bit.
“Come inside,” I say. She steps in past me and I shut the door.
“Oooh, Noah, are these your toys?” She coos at him a little bit and he laughs. “Want to play?”
She carries him over into the living room and puts him down. He scoots over to his vacuum and he starts to drag it a little bit while Mia laughs.
“He moves really well,” she says. “I’m impressed.”
“Obviously. I’m his father, after all. Kid’s gonna be a world class athlete.”
She gives me a grin. “You’re that kind of dad, huh? What if he likes musicals instead of sports?”
I grin right back. “Then he’s going to be the best damn singer in the whole world.”
“Good man,” she says, laughing.
“Who’s this?” Alice appears in the doorway of the kitchen.
“Hello, Mrs. Baker,” Mia says. She stands and shakes Alice’s hand.
Alice gives me a bemused look. “She’s polite,” she says.
I laugh a little. “She brought dinner,” I say.
“And generous.” Alice grins at Mia. “Well, honey, you’re welcome here any time.”
“Noah didn’t cry when she took him,” I say pointedly.