by Tia Siren
“For now.” I shrugged. “I’m hoping for good. The thing with Ben is, I want him too. I want both of them to be in my life and this baby’s life. I don’t want our relationship to change from what it was. I care about them both in the same manner, and it doesn’t feel right without Ben, no matter how hard I try.”
“I know you want that,” she said. “And I want you to have everything, but it might not work out that way for you. At least you have Grant. He sounds like a really great guy who’s standing beside you through everything. I couldn’t imagine what it feels like for his entire world to change and for him to lose his best friend at the same time. I know you could be happy with him. Maybe you can’t see it because you’re in love with Ben, too, but I think in time those feelings will fade. You have the opportunity to have a beautiful life with an amazing man and a gorgeous child. Don’t forget that and give up because Ben is an idiot who can’t seem to find his moral compass or his heart right now. You’ve been through so much, and I want you to continue to be happy with or without Ben.”
“I want to be happy too,” I said, shaking my head. “And yeah, Grant is an amazing man who I’m lucky to have in my life. I know I could have a wonderful life with him, but I will always have Ben in the back of my mind. I’m still hoping there’s a chance for all of us. I’m hoping Ben will wake up and see what he’s missing out on. It may not be right now, or even when I graduate, but I know his heart, and when he eventually sees that baby, I don’t think he’ll be able to stay away. At least that’s what I’m really wishing for.”
“And I hope you get your wish.” She rubbed my back. “I just want you to be prepared in case it doesn’t happen that way.”
“I will be. I know life isn’t some crazy fairy tale.” I smiled. “But every once in a while, it would be nice to catch a break.”
As I said that, the doors opened, and the students started coming in on their lunch breaks. I manned the espresso machine, and Piper took the orders. We worked feverishly, filling everything, happy we had a lunch kitchen guy for once. It was almost impossible to make food and drinks and ring people out with only Piper and me. My hands shook slightly as I filled the coffee orders, brewing espresso, adding flavors, different milks, and whatever else needed to be done. I was tired, I could tell, but I only had about two hours left at work. Just enough time to clean up after the rush.
My mind wandered back and forth between Grant and Ben, replaying what Piper had said to me. She was right. I was lucky to have someone like Grant, someone who wanted to be part of my life and the baby’s life. I knew, though, that I was also lucky to have Ben, even though he was acting like an idiot at that specific time. I knew what was in his heart, though, and I knew that it was me. He loved being with us. It had brought a light to his world that I hadn’t seen in him before. I didn’t understand how he could let it go like that.
I wanted all of us to be a family, and I wanted it to get that way before the baby was born. I didn’t want to bring a child into turmoil and heartbreak, and I didn’t want to have to figure it all out while transitioning into motherhood. I knew I was being demanding, and it might have been a lot to ask for, but I was determined to at least try to make it work. Just the thought of coming home every day, making dinner, and the four of us sitting around sharing a life made me extremely happy. There wasn’t anything I wanted more for myself or for my child. Maybe Piper and Grant were right. Maybe I would have to eventually accept being with only Grant, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t hope before that time. I wanted to make sure Grant knew he wasn’t second choice. He was just half of the choice. He felt a different kind of connection with Ben, and I knew he missed that too. The three of us were stellar together, and we could solve any problem that came along.
The truth was, I felt lost without Ben, only halfway where I was supposed to be. I never wanted to be in that position, but it was what it was. I had to make Ben understand, and I had to do it soon.
Chapter 29
Ben
It was Friday night, and I decided to stay in, relaxing in my place with my phone off and light music in the background. It had been one of the most stressful weeks so far as a professor, and I was even more nervous now than I had been at the beginning of the week. I had decided to submit my resume and qualifications to be Dean of Students, something I didn’t have a lot of time in for, but it was something I thought I would actually be good at. They were going to be reviewing everything this weekend and announcing who would be offered the position on Monday. I was up against a lot of stiff competition, but the president had looked pleased when I took my portfolio to her to declare my interest.
What I needed to do this weekend was destress, take the edge off of everything that had happened in the last week. I thought about going out and getting some drinks, but the last thing I needed was to end up taking home some student and blowing my chances for the position. I decided the safest thing for me to do would be to stay home, relax, and really think everything through. Everyone around me was trying to pressure me, guilt trip me, acting like I didn’t realize how big of a deal everything was, but I wasn’t stupid. I was trying to figure things out in a way that would allow me to keep my career and be part of Kylie and Grant’s lives. The biggest problem was they wouldn’t leave me alone long enough to think clearly.
Between the baby, getting the dean and provost fired and arrested, and putting in for the new position, my head was spinning. I didn’t know what to think about anything anymore. My life was so different than it was a couple months ago, and though I didn’t regret one second making sure they got fired, everything was a bit hard to swallow. I had fallen for a girl, started an insanely hot relationship, and now I was possibly going to be the new Dean of Students for one of the best colleges in the world. It was not at all what I had expected, and it was way off my ten-year plan, but I wasn’t about to take it for granted. Of course, with these things came their fair share of issues, like the fact that Kylie was a student and not someone I was actually free to be with, especially if I was named the dean.
I thought the answer to that was pushing Kylie away, at least until she graduated, but I couldn’t get her off my mind. Every time I turned around, my thoughts were roaming to her. I wondered how she was doing, what she was going through, how she was feeling, and everything in between. I knew that if I reached out and checked on her, I would get sucked back in and fast. My head was all confused about the logistics but not about how I felt about her. That was the easy part to understand.
I stood up and walked over to the fridge, grabbing a beer and opening it up. I looked over at the time and realized it was only eight, and I was already driving myself nuts. What a Friday night it had turned out to be. Instead of relaxing, I was thinking about Kylie. Besides the way I felt about her, I really missed our fun times together. Watching her get fucked by Grant was one of the hottest things I had ever seen. It was like a real-life porno that I could actually join in on. I had been with more than one person before like that, but it had been very generic and safe. With Kylie, I felt like I could let it go, like I could act out my fantasies and not be judged for them. Grant made me feel like that, too, like nothing I wanted to do to Kylie was too over the edge or too crazy. It wasn’t every day that you found people like that, people who shared your interests and made you feel at home and safe in your own sexuality. It was possible they were the only two who would ever totally make me feel that way.
Kylie was magnetic, opening up and blossoming like a flower in our hands. She had never been with two men like that before, but as soon as she had, she was in it full force, never looking back. I loved the fact that she would both of us fuck her at one time. Usually, when you found a girl like that, she was either sleeping with everyone already or not serious about it, wanting the fantasy but nothing that came with it. Kylie wanted everything that came with it, no matter what the cost was, and when her heart had taken her by surprise, she embraced it wholeheartedly. I was in love with her. I knew it even if I wou
ldn’t admit it, and as every moment passed, I wanted her more and more.
I missed her pussy, the way it felt, the way it tasted, and how she could make me come in two seconds if I let myself. It was like there was something about the way we meshed together that was meant to be. When her pussy squeezed around my shaft as she came and the juices ran down, covering my balls, God, I could barely contain myself. I leaned my head back against the couch and shut my eyes, imagining her riding me, her legs wrapped around me, her warm pussy sheathing my sword, and her tits bouncing up and down. I didn’t know how long I could stay away.
I opened my eyes and shook my head, tipping my beer back and finishing it off. I had to get this girl out of my head, or it was going to ruin me. I jumped up and headed to the bathroom, figuring a shower would help. However, as I stepped into the steaming hot water and felt it melt over my skin like silk, my cock only got harder. It was so ready to go, it almost hurt, and I grabbed it, smoothing my hand down the shaft until I knew exactly what I needed to do to relieve some of the tension. I grabbed the conditioner and squeezed a bit on my hand, stroking it over my dick. I groaned at the feeling, remembering how silky smooth it was to be inside of Kylie.
I leaned forward and pushed my hands against the wall and closed my eyes, immediately transporting myself inside of Kylie. I imagined her in the shower with me, bent over grabbing her ankles as I fucked her pussy, Grant standing just outside the tub watching, holding his dick in his hand. I grabbed her hips and thrust in and out, pulling her forward and pushing her back again, groaning loudly at the sounds of her screams. The hot water ran over her back and down over my cock, and it splashed up every time I slammed into her. It was sensual and erotic, exactly how I always liked it with her.
She made her way to a standing position, and I pushed her forward, still inside. I put my leg up on the tub and jammed my dick as far into her as I could, lifting up on my tiptoes. Her face pressed against the cool tile, and she screamed out in pleasure. I pulled back, grabbing my cock as Grant lifted her out of the tub and sat down in front of her on the sink. She looked back at me as she bent over, immediately deep throating his cock. I stepped out of the tub and walked forward, sliding my dick into her ass, feeling the tightness inside. She moaned with a full mouth as I plowed into her over and over again, pulling out and switching over to her pussy halfway through. I couldn’t get enough of her body, enough of how she felt on the inside. She rocked back and forth, the sound of her sucking down his dick filling my ears.
I ran my fingers through her ass and pressed my thumb inside, slapping my body against her over and over. She moaned, lifting her ass higher into the air as I pressed my thumb in farther. She threw her head back and jacked him off, looking at me in the mirror as I fingered her ass and fucked her pussy hard.
“More,” she screamed out.
“Come for me, right on my dick,” I growled, moving faster.
She arched her chest forward and threw her head back, her body shaking in my hands as she came long and hard. As soon as I felt her juices explode over my dick, I pulled out, spinning her around and sitting her down on Grant’s lap. She feverishly slid his cock into her as I reached my hand forward and rubbed her clit, putting my lips just inches from hers. She breathed heavily, still moaning from the first orgasm. I climbed up, putting my knees on either side of Grant’s legs and reaching forward toward the mirror, balancing myself. She grabbed my dick and stuck it in her mouth, leaning her head back against him.
I began to thrust my hips forward, fucking her mouth over and over again. She widened her lips and opened her throat allowing me to stick it all the way down, holding it there for a moment and then pulling back out. She reached up and grabbed my ass, pulling me in and out of her mouth, fast and deep. I growled, feeling the suction at the back of her throat as she pulled me back out of her, her hips gyrating wildly against Grant below me. I looked at myself in the mirror for a moment and then back down at her, not wanting to lose my concentration. As Grant picked her up and started to bob her up and down on his cock, she angled her head down and did the same with her mouth. After a few moments, she pulled her head back breathing heavily.
“I want to be filled,” she whimpered.
I got down off the sink and pulled her down in the floor, lying down as she straddled me with that warm wet pussy. Grant got behind her and pushed deep in her ass, leaning forward over us. As she moved up and down, he pushed forward and back, forcing her clit to rub across my body. She bit down on her lip, trying to hold back her screams, but she couldn’t. She was too far into it. She let out a held breath, the moans going with it echoing off the bathroom walls. I gripped her thighs as she fucked my cock, watching her get it in all her holes.
As she shimmied on top of me, my cock throbbed, needing release. She screamed out, her tits bouncing as her body began to shake, her pussy pulsing around my shaft. I grabbed her hips and slammed her down onto me, thrusting up and groaning loud, shooting my come as hard as I possibly could. Grant had grabbed her shoulders and done the same thing, our voices melding together into a chorus. I closed my eyes as I squeezed the last bit of come from my dick.
When I opened them again, I was in the shower, the water still running over my body, my hot seed circling the drain. I breathed deeply, wishing she was there in that bathroom with me, but knowing I was the one who had kept her away. I needed to talk to her, to try to explain, if she would even hear me out anymore.
Chapter 30
Kylie
It was Saturday, and I was happy to be at home, baking some Christmas cookies and trying to get my mind off stressful things. It was lightly snowing outside, just enough to be pretty but not enough to make it uncomfortable to go out. I was glad for that because Piper had already left for work. As I stuck the cookie cutter in the dough, my phone buzzed. It was Ben. I stood there for a second, completely shocked that he was calling.
“Hello?” I said carefully.
“Hey there,” he said with his charming voice. “Did I catch you at a bad time?”
“No, just making some cookies,” I said sweetly.
“Do you think you could put that on pause and come over to my apartment? I want to talk to you about some stuff,” he said.
“Is that safe? Your apartment is crawling with professors,” I said.
“It’s fine. Almost everyone is out shopping or doing other things with the school,” he said.
“All right. Give me about ten minutes,” I replied.
“I’ll be here, apartment 208 on the second floor,” he said.
I was really surprised, but I was also very curious about why he wanted me over there. I balled the dough back up, covered it, and stuck it in the fridge for later. I changed into a sweater and stretch pants and jumped in my car, trying not to speed in the weather. When I got to the complex, I realized he was right, there was barely a car there and no one in the lobby. I got in the elevator and went up to his floor, making sure no one was walking past before ringing the bell. He came to the door and hurried me in, smiling as I walked through the door. I followed him to the living room expecting to see Grant, but he was nowhere to be found.
“Where is Grant? Does he know you called me over to your place?”
“No,” Ben said, shaking his head. “Do you want some tea? I have some made in the fridge.”
“Sure,” I said, feeling uneasy about not having Grant there.
I watched him pour a glass of tea and put the container back in the fridge. It was steaming, and I could tell he had made it just before I got there. I wasn’t sure what this was about, but it looked like he was trying. He handed me the glass and smiled, guiding me into the living room. I sat down on the couch with him across from me in the chair.
“I feel weird without Grant here,” I said.
“I know. It’s nothing secretive.” He smiled. “I wanted to talk to you alone before the three of us talked next. I have some things to say that I want you to draw your own conclusions about. I’m not saying Gran
t is a bad guy or anything. I just wanted a minute alone with you, that’s all. I’ll tell him what is said here, I promise.”
“All right,” I said, smiling. “What is it that you want to tell me?”
“Well, first I want to start out by apologizing to you for the way I have been acting,” he said. “It was a shock to my system, and I handled it terribly. I should have been there for you, talked to you about how I was feeling, and then gone from there. I shouldn’t have shut you or Grant out. I have a really hard time not grabbing you up when I’m with you, and I wanted this to be a time when I really reflected on my life, your life, Grant’s life, and what it would mean to bring all of those together.”
“Your apology is accepted,” I said. “I want you to be able to be your own person, to make your own choices, but I wanted you to remember that I didn’t do this to myself. We were all involved in the making of this baby, and when you dipped out on me, it left me half broken. No matter how many hugs Grant gives, it doesn’t ever fully fix it for me because you’re the third person in the equation. You always have been.”
“My other issue, though, is how do I know the child is even mine?”
“As far as I am concerned, and I’m pretty sure Grant feels this way, too, no matter whose sperm created the child, it was made with love by all three of us,” I said. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I want to be with both of you together as a family. I want us all to raise this baby as our own. Both of you would make amazing fathers, capable of teaching our child the most important things in life. I will never feel whole if I don’t have you there with us. Something will always feel off or missing from our lives, and that baby will miss you without even knowing you.”
“It’s amazing to me how much you feel like we’re all one unit,” he said, smiling. “I love that. I’ve never had that.”
“I want to be your submissive,” I said, smiling big. “For a really long time, but I need you guys to be a family for me to make that possible. I can’t have two completely separate lives where one minute I am a single mother over here and part of a love triangle over there. If you won’t be part of it, I’ll have to let you go if that’s even possible and commit myself completely to Grant. I care about Grant deeply, but I don’t know if I can do all of this without you. Grant misses you too. The three of us have a connection that is otherworldly.”