by Vanessa Mars
He slipped into his suit and favorite tie, the gift she had bought for him exactly five months ago. He had kept it neat and preserved it till this day; this day, five months later on which he planned to propose to her. He smiled at himself as he stood in front of the mirror and made his professional knot. His moustache made him look older and more handsome. He splashed few sprays of perfume and shined of his shoes. He was ready.
He glanced at his watch. It was 8:55am, time to leave. There was no turning back now. His love and he were going to meet at 9:00am at the bridge. Knowing her well, he had told her that the two of them would meet at 8:30am. She was always twenty five minutes late for all their appointments. She spent way too much time in front of the mirror, trying to beautify herself.
He should have told her that even if she came to meet him with disheveled hair and a dozen pimples, she would still be overwhelmingly beautiful to him. Perhaps that would have saved on time. But for the sake of her, he tried to be patient with her.
He felt the fresh morning breeze on his face the moment he stepped out of his house. He walked briskly. A minute later he bumped into a new friend that he had made at his new job. After exchanging a few casual albeit warm greetings, his friend asked why he was dressed so fancy this early in the morning.
“I have a date with Jenni” he plainly told him. Secrecy only arouses more curiosity; and curiosity more questions; and more questions means more time wasted.
After bidding Timothy goodbye, he was on the move again. He entered the restaurant with confidence and his eyes darted around in search of her. He looked far ahead of him and saw the vague image of her leaning against the table, checking her cell phone. She was looking a bit restless. He could tell because she seemed to be more nervous than usual. He hastened his pace, the frown on his face giving way to a smile as he approached her.
As he looked on, the serene image of his girl was suddenly and abruptly shielded from his sight by a large man. He came to a halt within a few inches of his chest. He slowly raised his eyes towards Chad’s face. He stared. He recognized Jenni’s father. There was a scowling look on his face.
“I hope you are not going to propose to my daughter. Scotty down at the hardware store mentioned he had seen your father recently. You know very well that I do not approve of your relationship,” her father said in a threatening tone.
“Why on earth would you reach such a conclusion?” Chad asked with a sinking heart. At that moment, he regretted telling his father of his plans for today. His mother was overcome with excitement for him when he showed her the ring that he had saved up to purchase.
Her father scowled at him in disapproval. “I heard what you boys done over there, you know. Your friend John from your battalion let everyone know at the pool hall that you shot down that kid in cold blood. Purple Heart. You didn’t deserve that, and you know it.” He glanced over his shoulder to Jenni and she finally looked up at the two of them. “You don’t deserve her love. You ain't no hero to me.”
He had something in common with her father. They both liked to drown their sorrows in the drink of their choice. For a brief second, Chad wondered if it was best for him to turn tail and find the nearest stool near the bar instead of meeting Jenni at the table. It was no surprise to him that some type of obstacle would stand between the only thing that he had ever made a commitment to in his entire life.
“Sir, I…” he stuttered. How could he possibly make her father understand his love for her.
He was just thinking of how best to get out of this extremely bad situation when Jennis’ father’s phone thankfully rang. He listened in amazement. The ring tone was one of Akon’s songs, “Put the blame on me.” he wondered what a man of his age would be doing with such a song as his ring tone.
He began giving instructions to someone on the other end of the phone. “Don’t leave. I will be there soon.” He frowned again as he slipped the phone back into his pocket.
“Look, stay away from my daughter,” he said, pointing at him with his thick finger. “She deserves a lot better than the likes of you.” He shook his head as he walked away. Chad very much disliked his ill temper and very much disliked him at this moment in time.
He was solemn when he walked to the table. But she was still smiling broadly as usual. She was looking like a princess and seemed ecstatic about seeing him. She stood up and he went to embrace her, but the two were interrupted again. He fumbled the ring box in his hand, and it stumbled onto the floor and under the table.
“Chad… oh my God! Chad!” a familiar voice called from the side. He turned his head sharply, dismayed. To his utter shock and amazement, He saw a girl running towards him. She was dressed scantily in a summer dress with spaghetti straps and was wearing high heels. He hardly recognized her.
“Natasha?” he asked in disbelief. The blond bombshell threw herself at him and hugged him warmly. Jenni glared at the two of them with a hint of jealousy in her eyes. He could tell she was hurt.
“Chad, I really missed you!” she said, bubbling with joy.
“What’s been… what’s happening with you?” he asked suspiciously. “I haven’t seen you in years.”
“Chad….” She replied with tears in her eyes, “You are mine, I love you”
He wanted to bend over and pick up the ring. He wanted to give the ring to Jenni. He wanted this strange girl from high school to disappear from the restaurant. He raised his head and moved his gaze back away from Natasha and looked back at Jenni’s tender heart-shaped face. He could clearly see and feel her pain. Her eyes were already red with tears. He tried to loosen himself from Natasha’s grip, but she clung to him tighter.
“Lover… Don’t leave,” she cried, “don’t leave me again.”
He shook his head no and attempted to shove Natasha off him. He was becoming annoyed by her intrusion. Before he could stop Jenni, she stormed out of the restaurant. She left Natasha and Chad in a cloud of dust.
“That was the easiest fifty bucks I ever made,” Natasha laughed. She returned to the table where her friends were waiting for her. Instead of being the best day of Chad’s life, it was the worst.
**************
The birds fluttered and chirped. Warm rays of sun bathed the whole landscape. Chad ambled towards the dorm room, whistling to himself. After reaching the girls dorm room on campus, another student directed him to room number 83.
Knock… Knock… Knock…
Heavy footsteps diffused Chad’s ears and the door opened with a faint click. It was Jenni.
“Chad!” Jenni shrieked. She rushed towards him and hurled herself at him, hugging him tightly. After a while, she loosened herself and stared into his face with her large, round eyes.
“How are you?” she asked, tightly gripping his arms. The two hadn’t seen each other in two years, since Jenni went off to college.
“Better now,” he confessed, smiling down at her.
She giggled merrily, grasped his hand and pulled him across the room to the chair which stood at the far end near the open window through which a cool breeze was blowing into the room. The pink curtains fluttered elegantly, filling him with an intense nostalgia as he remembered those days not so long ago when he used to visit her almost every other day. Jenni’s roommate was seated on the bed, reading her favorite novel.
“Hi!” he greeted after he had sat down.
“Hi!” Vicky greeted him back, with a beaming smile. She batted her eyelids rapidly, which she usually did when she was very happy.
“So how have you been?” he asked, turning his attention to Jenni.
“I have been fine,” she responded.
“That is good,” he said with a sigh. He was already lost in her gaze. Her big, round eyes seemed to bore through him. He shifted a bit uneasily.
“How is school?” he asked after a brief spell of silence. Jenni’s gaze usually unnerved him.
“It’s been very hard, Chad,” she responded, shaking her head sadly.
“I am sorry to he
ar about that,” he revealed with sympathy painted all over his face. “Just make sure you work hard on your studies… You don’t want to end up like me, do you?”
“Gee no” she said in a small voice, scrutinizing him hard.
“You are very strong, Chad,” Vicky said, murmuring with wonderment.
“What do you mean?” He asked with a puzzled expression, raising one eyebrow.
Jenni scowled her direction. Vicky didn’t respond, but went back to her book.
“Do you two have some secret you’re not sharing with me?” he asked with a half-heated chuckle.
Jenni was not laughing. She was staring at him pitifully and shaking her head at the same time.
“I’m not sure why you’re here.” He could see the deep pain return to her eyes, must like that day when Natasha had interrupted his proposal to Jenni.
“I miss you,” he said, staring hard and affectionately at her. “Your parents told me you went away to college. I thought it was best just to leave you go. But I can’t stop thinking about you…” his words trailed off.
“Wow.” Vicky breathed inaudibly, giving him nervous glances.
“I can imagine what you are going through,” Jenni nods. “I’ve been missing you too.”
There was a moment or two of awkward silence. Finally, Chad got up and stretched his hand towards Jenni.
“Would you mind going for a walk?” He asked, nervously and shakily.
“Okay,” She agreed. She rushed to her closet and pulled out a pair of tennis shoes. Vicky smiled as the two left the dorm room, but there was a hint of envy in her eyes.
A few moments later, Chad and Jenni were walking along the corridors, down some steps and onto the driveway. She was walking jauntily beside him, and his heart swelled with pride. Jenni was a very pretty girl and most guys could only dream of being with her. In fact, he had heard that she had turned down a number of offers from some of his friends before she had left for college. But yet, here he was.
“Let’s get something to drink,” she suggested as they walked by the café. She flashed her familiar smile that left him breathless for several moments. After they had bought their drinks they sat down at one of the empty tables. Chad sipped at his drink nervously.
“Do you know why I came?” he asked after a painful while of gaping, gasping and sighing.
“I don’t know…” she responded, shrugging.
“Well…” he said, his heart beating faster as she stared into his eyes. He struggled for the words to come out.
“Why did you come?” she asked.
His mind went blank for several moments. He had practiced all the way to the college on what he would say to her, but now, he could not just get himself to say it. He stared at her hair to avoid her penetrative gaze. Her bare shoulders were only covered by the thin straps that held up her flowing sun dress. She shivered as if she were cold, and he moved to cover her in his jacket, the way a man should.
“I came to see you,” he said finally.
“Really? I am flattered,” she said, unsure of herself.
“I did terribly miss you.” he said with a slight wince.
“I know,” she exclaimed, stretching out her hand and placing it on his. She intertwined her fingers into his and he was grateful to feel her soft touch again. He stared at it in disbelief, surprised that she actually held his hand after so many long years.
“It is normal to miss a friend,” she changed her tone and sounded cold and distant. Chad stared at her with slight discouragement. He slowly withdrew his hand. He did not like the look on her face. It seemed that she did not really know how he felt about her. Did she know how hard it had been to say what he had just said?
He ran his finger around the rim of the bottle as he thought of what to say next.
“You see, you are not just like any ordinary friend to me.” he breathed, giving her a sideward glance. “You are special. You are so much more than you think you are to me… I knew from the moment that we met.”
He observed, with a growing amount of alarm, that she suddenly grew even colder and more distant as he spoke to her. The glimmer in her eyes slowly vanished, giving way to a frightful dark expression. The edges of her lips curved downwards and the smile on them was gone. But he was not going to let that discourage him from saying what he wanted. He had come too far.
“Jenni,” he continued with a voice full of emotion, “When I left, I could not think of anything else or anyone else but you. I realized that it is you that I want to be with for the rest of my life.” he held his breath and held her hand, though barely looking at her. “What I am trying to say is that: I fell in love with you, Jenni. Just forget that day, that fucking day… Jenni I still love you”
Chad inched forward but Jenni stood frozen in place. Chad stopped and turned, darting a glance on her face. Jenni’s cheeks were going red as she heard this.
“Chad… I love… But I can’t…” She murmured, with trembling hands. “We can’t…”
“ Jenni, I can’t lose you again... You are the love of my life,” Chad felt tears stinging his eyes. His head started to spin. He tried to get his wits about him, but he failed miserably.
Rubbing her hands between his fingers, Chad cried: “Jenni... I love you… Please believe me…”
“One second,” she stopped him abruptly, then unzipped her bag and started digging inside of it. In a jiffy, she ejected out two figurines – one was of him and the other was of herself.
“Here…” Jenni whispered.
“What…?” Chad swiveled and his eyes were full of tears.
Jenni handed her figurine to Chad. “Keep it… Remember us…” She kissed him softly and before he knew it, she was gone.
Chad held onto the figurine for a very long time. Every time he looked at it, it reminded him of something that could never be. After many years, he finally put his figurine away in a box. He wanted to forget about her, even though she still came to him in his dreams.
**************
Chad awoke and peered out of the window. The sun’s rays penetrated the curtains and denied Chad’s need to sleep in. He was dreaming of Jenni again, much like he did most every night. She could come to him in his dreams, but he was still deeply hurt that he was living his life without his soul mate. He opened his eyes and swiveled his neck to right. He shot a glance at the clock and sighed.
He smoothed out the wrinkles and creases in the bed sheets which cradled him. He pretended that he smelt her perfume. Years later, he still yearned for her soft touch. Lady luck did not side with him after all these years. In fact, his entire life had been relatively unlucky. Prolonging the doze a little longer, he tried to retrieve the past memories of the days which they spent together. Sometimes he wished he could forget her.
The images of her love flashed across his mind and gave him a false sense of security. A smile crossed his lips for a brief moment. He couldn’t imagine the rest of his life without her.
His thoughts were snapped by a knock on the bedroom door.
“Come in...” Chad said, wiping his tears away.
“We haven’t seen you back here in 4 years,” his father uttered. “The least you could do is go have breakfast with me and your mom.” It was good to see the old man again. He had moved to Chicago for some time to take a job. It was better for him to get out of the town for a while.
Putting on his slippers, he went into the bathroom to shower. After eating breakfast with his parents, Chad started his car and headed to the meat market to pick up some roast for dinner.
“Great….” Chad was slightly annoyed with the red light. He wanted to hurry back to make a phone call before he and dad left to go fishing.
As the traffic was stopped, Chad glanced nervously at his wristwatch and fidgeted his fingers on the wheel. He turned his neck left and a figure in the car nearest to him grabbed his attention.
“It’s my figurine…” Chad couldn’t believe what he was seeing. It was Jenni. She hadn’t imagined that
she would move back into town from college. He thought that she would be somewhere far away from here with a big fancy job and a family of her own.
He froze at the traffic light.
“ The End”