The Forgotten Seven

by Part Seven (lit)

  "Yearning … or love."

  She forced an unhappy chuckle. "I shouldn't even be homesick," she muttered. "No one's there anymore. My home isn't even there anymore. I don't know where my brother is. He joined the Federation forces. I joined the colony militia."

  "You are making her unhappy," Jalen said tightly, plunking her food container down on the table in front of her.

  Danielle glanced from Baen to Jalen, saw the brewing anger, and intervened. "He isn't making me unhappy. My thoughts are."

  She stared at her food, stirring the steaming food with the eating utensil Jalen had given her. "The truth is I was too much of a coward to face my losses. I closed myself off from my emotions, convincing myself I could fight better if I could avoid feeling them. But they've always been there, waiting for me to acknowledge them. They didn't just go away because I refused to face things.

  "I'm homesick for something that's gone and has been gone a long time. I've been unhappy for a very long time. I just let myself be angry instead and focused on trying to make the Nubiens pay for what they took from me.

  "It won't bring them back, though."

  Jalen settled across from her. "Who?"

  She glanced at him. "My family. I know, you don't understand that either. It's what mating is all about, to us, though. My father didn't just impregnate my mother and leave her. He stayed with her. They had three children together-me, and my brother and sister. One male and two females. And even though, more often than not, people don't stay together long enough for their children to get grown, my parents did. They were still together when they were killed. They planned to always be together. They intended to grow old together and take care of each other."

  Jalen frowned. "I do not understand that. They could not know when they would die. How could they plan to grow old together?"

  Briefly, indignation flickered through Danielle. It occurred to her, though, that there really was no way to insure that you'd be with somebody forever, as long as their lifespan. You could outlive them or vice versa. "That's a very good point," she said, smiling with an effort.

  She couldn't say that it lifted her spirits, at all, but she realized it was a good point. Maybe everybody else wasn't completely wrong? Maybe it was safer not to allow yourself to be so tied to another person when life was so uncertain? Or maybe they just didn't always bond like her parents had?

  That actually made a lot of sense considering how rare it was for a couple to bind themselves for longer than one contract. Either they were always searching for new bonds to protect themselves from one that would completely cripple them or they were always hopeful, each time they found someone, that they had found that perfect bond and wouldn't need or want to break it?

  "This contradicts the information that you gave me before," Baen said accusingly.

  She glanced at him. "Not really."

  He frowned, clearly thinking it over. "Yes, it does."

  Danielle couldn't help but chuckle at his expression. "You just think so because I haven't given you the whole picture. I told you it was complicated."

  "You are saying that we cannot grasp it?" Kiel said tightly as he entered the room where they had settled to eat.

  She glanced at him in surprise. "I didn't say that. I didn't mean to imply it, anyway." She considered it. "But the truth is that you might not be able to-ever. I'm not sure it really matters. I don't know your people's ways, or instincts. We aren't the same, but that doesn't mean you can't … function within our society once you understand it. That just means it might not be natural to you and it might not be desirable.

  "The only relationships any of you have ever experienced, as far as I can see, is between friends-and comrades-all male. None of you seem to understand love, so I'm guessing that means you don't have any males that are homosexual, which I have to say is really strange. It's commonplace in most animal species-including humans. I think it's a natural selection thing, or maybe purely to help keep balance since homosexual pairs can't reproduce. Nobody has ever really figured that out, but it's a fact that some men are only attracted, sexually, to other men and some women are only attracted, sexually, to other women. And they love one another. It's more than friendship. It's every bit as strong and lasting as love can be between two heterosexuals."

  She discovered that all three men were looking at her with expressions of disbelief and revulsion.

  Kiel glared at her. "Is this why you told me so shove my cock up my ass?" he demanded. "Do your people also love themselves?"

  Danielle almost choked on her food. She struggled not to laugh but discovered she couldn't help it. They looked more indignant and more confused. "Actually, some people do love themselves better than anyone else," she finally managed. "And I suppose it's deeply satisfying for them. Some even pleasure themselves more than other people. I've tried it myself. I'm not much for it, though. I know what feels good, but there's just something … lacking in handling yourself. It's called masturbation," she added.

  "They do this when they have no mate?" Kiel guessed.

  "Good guess," Danielle said dryly. "Because they have needs and if there isn't anybody around to take care of them, then they handle it themselves."

  "This is why you have masturbation?" Baen demanded. "You do not need masturbation. I am willing to handle your needs."

  Danielle felt her face heat, but she rolled her eyes at his offer. Who didn't know that was coming?

  He had a point, though, she realized. She had three handsome, willing, candidates. Why turn them down when she knew damned well that she was needy?

  Because she was worried about complications.

  Well, the one complication she'd been worried about was becoming too attached to them and clearly she'd already screwed that up!

  Of course, that didn't mean she was beyond recovering-yet! Maybe it was stupid to consider it under those circumstances? What choice did she really have, though? Clearly, they were hell bent on mating and she was at their mercy. She could try to fight them off, and lose, and make enemies. Or she could try to control her emotions and make very good friends.

  At least if she took that route, she had some chance of convincing them to take her home-which she probably shouldn't be considering at all when there was so much potential for trouble. Selfish or not, though, she simply couldn't face the possibility of never going back and never seeing anyone she knew again. Besides, even if she was willing to make that sacrifice, Gertrude had the coordinates and they had access to Gertrude. With or without her help, they could find the planets that made up the Federation.

  Everything else aside, she had already told Baen-and Kiel for that matter-that she would help them to understand. If they didn't have some social skills when and if they reached the human population there was bound to be trouble-serious trouble!

  "Thanks," she told Baen a little dryly. "I'm going to keep that in mind. I'll be sure to let you know when the urge hits me."

  He frowned. Clearly it wasn't the answer he'd wanted or expected. "You are not needy now? Kiel said …."

  "Kiel said what?" Danielle growled, narrowing her eyes at Kiel.

  "That you had mated with him," Jalen supplied. "I knew it was a lie!"

  Kiel punched him in the jaw, sending him reeling off the bench.

  It shocked Danielle so much that she gaped at him. "What did you do that for?"

  "He impugned my honor!" Kiel growled. "I do not lie!"

  Danielle recovered enough to glare at him. "Well you aren't supposed to kiss and tell either, damn it! That isn't honorable either!"

  "I did not tell them I kissed you."

  The logic of the statement didn't escape her, but he was going to have to learn not to take every damned thing so literally! "You aren't supposed to fuck and tell either, damn it!"

  "Why not?"

  "Because … because it's supposed to be personal and not to be shared!"

  Baen stared at her. "You should have told us that! We are honor bound to share because we gave ou
r word we would!"

  Danielle gaped at him. "To who?"

  "Everyone," Jalen said, massaging his jaw as he picked himself up off the floor.

  "Everyone meaning …?"

  "Everyone," Kiel said tightly. "We cannot be expected to learn if we are not taught! It seemed the most logical and efficient way to handle it. We learn with you and we send the information to everyone else."

  "Oh my god!" Danielle gasped. "This is … this is a full scale … tutoring situation?"

  The three men frowned, looking at each other for answers none of them seemed to have.

  "Did you not say that you would teach and then the others could learn?" Baen demanded.

  "Well, shit! I didn't mean like that, damn it!"

  "I told you that she had no grasp of logic," Kiel muttered. "How are we to keep our experiences to ourselves and share it at the same fucking time?"

  Danielle massaged her temples, curbing the desire to fling something at them-besides words.

  "We are approaching the second wormhole," Gertrude announced cheerfully.

  "Already?" Danielle demanded in disbelief, effectively diverted from giving the three men a piece of her mind.

  "On my mark … twenty and counting."

  "Well, thank god we took the time to eat before we went into the second wormhole!" Danielle growled. "Now we'll have plenty of ammunition for puking!"

  Getting up, she left her food on the table and stalked back to the bridge. Behind her, she heard the men hurriedly cleaning up and securing the galley. They were clearly torn between anger and uneasiness as they returned to the bridge and buckled themselves in for the trip through the second wormhole. Danielle was of the opinion that it would've unsettled everyone's stomach even if they hadn't just eaten. The second was far more turbulent than the first. She spent most of the trip struggling with the urge to throw up, bolstered by the reflection that if anyone did throw up they were all going to be wearing it when the damned ship stopped spinning. The moment the ship stopped spiraling and bucking, she threw off her harness and headed for her cabin as fast as she could.

  The men nearly outran her, but fortunately, they had a different goal in mind. She managed to make it to her own private waste disposal unit before emptying her stomach and, as she'd predicted, it was way worse given the fact that she had a full stomach. She was so weak by the time she managed to stop gagging it took all she could do to lever herself off the floor. When she'd washed her mouth and bathed her face, she staggered back into her cabin and collapsed weakly on her bunk, waiting for her head to stop spinning.

  "Correcting course," Gertrude announced.

  "Go fuck yourself, bitch!" Danielle snarled. "You couldn't have told us we were about to go into another damned wormhole?"

  "I informed you that there were two."

  "You didn't inform me that they were so damned close together!" Danielle snapped. "You did that on purpose!"

  "I am not certain what this accusation pertains to," Gertrude responded. "I cannot address it when I do not understand it."

  "You know what I'm talking about, you vicious bitch! Don't tell me you had no idea traveling through one would completely throw us all off kilter and produce motion sickness!"

  "There was no possibility of avoiding it," Gertrude said pointedly. "The course set by the Danu required passing through both."

  "Is the course set now?" Danielle asked, tired of arguing with the damned computer.

  "We are on course, Captain Dubois."

  "Good. Go away and don't bother me."

  "I cannot go …."

  "Shut the fuck up!" Danielle snarled.

  She didn't actually doze off although she hoped for oblivion for a while. Eventually, the weakness and the nausea faded and her thoughts turned from her misery to the conversation she'd had with the men.

  There was just no getting around the fact that she continually expected them to understand things they clearly didn't. There were more holes in their understanding of basic social behavior than she'd expected and she felt less competent to explain than she had in the beginning. It gave her a headache just trying to figure out where to start! She'd had no idea that she'd accumulated such vast stores of knowledge and experience!

  Maybe, she thought, because she hadn't been much more than an infant when she'd begun to absorb such things?

  Probably.

  The question was, just how much could she teach and how much could they learn? She didn't think there was any real limitation to their learning abilities, but she had a bad feeling her teaching skills weren't great. Beyond that, there was a time limit. She didn't know how much of a time limit, but she did know she was going to have to give them a crash course. Their mission wasn't likely to be a long, drawn out one. Even if it took months, which she doubted given the capabilities of the ship they'd designed, months weren't much time to make up for years of learning by trial and error, some instruction, and some behavior learned by simply observing everyone else interacting.

  She decided she'd been on the right track when she'd first broached the subject with Baen. They needed rules. She needed to think hard on those rules and make them as clear and concise as she possibly could.

  The 'stop' rule was a good one. It was actually more complicated than that since most people tried to 'read' the person they were with, but she didn't think she had the time to spare trying to explain that. Anyway, men weren't worth a shit at 'reading' women-human men. It wasn't right to expect the Danu to do any better.

  She brightened considerably when it occurred to her that they wouldn't be expected to understand human society, not completely anyway. They were aliens! People would expect them to behave differently and, to an extent, their strangeness would be tolerated.

  Having made up her mind, she got up and went to take a bath and change clothes since she still felt disgusting after barfing up her lunch … or whatever meal that was.

  She found the men in the galley, eating.

  "Everyone's feeling better, I see," she said dryly.

  "We were empty after …." Jalen began.

  Danielle held up her hand. "Don't tell me! I know, but that's beside the point. We don't discuss bodily functions in polite company."

  Baen and Kiel and Jalen all frowned, exchanging questioning looks. "We are all animals."

  "I know, but we are higher animals! Lower animals don't know any better and they aren't disgusted. Higher animals, socially skilled animals, make an attempt not to disgust everyone around them. They control bodily functions until they are in a place, alone, where it is appropriate to … relax and behave like beasts."

  Jalen frowned. "I do not understand why it would be disgusting."

  "Because you're a man and men seem to enjoy being disgusting. Women don't, so that's a rule … if you want to get along with women."

  "This includes …?"

  "Everything," Danielle said with emphasis. "Also picking and scratching-which includes adjusting your balls. I don't care how uncomfortable you are."

  They all looked a little sullen, but none of them said anything else.

  "I do not understand how this has anything to do with mating," Baen said finally when she'd fixed herself another meal and settled at the table with them.

  "Everything that is social has to do with mating," Danielle said. "Any time you're with a person of the opposite sex you might be with someone you discover that you like or they might know someone that you would be interested in. If you use what is accepted as polite social behavior at all times, then you don't run the risk of appearing unappealing to the woman you want.

  "Some women are more … earthy and not as unsettled, or disgusted, by such things as others but you never know until you get to know them better, so it's just better to be safe than sorry. Nobody is going to look down on you, or avoid you, for being neatly groomed, polite, and extremely well mannered."

  Kiel frowned at her. "This pertains to what you said to me about mating practices?"

  Pleasure wafted thr
ough her. Maybe it wouldn't be so hard to teach them after all? "Yes. I'm not familiar with the animals you have on your world, but they're pretty much the same everywhere when it comes to mating and in that way humans are the same, too. You want to impress any potential mate with how beautiful, or handsome, you are, your strength, intelligence, dependability, honesty-all the qualities that a female looks for in a mate. It's simpler with the lower animals. They don't have complicated social behavior like we do, but that's part of the 'good impression' of yourself that you want to get across. You want to make them think you're the very best at everything so she'll choose you above the others."

  "You are saying that we will have no appeal to human women unless we learn to behave contrary to our nature and hide the fact that we are aliens and capable of shifting?" he said coolly.

  Danielle's pleasure took a nose dive. Irritation replaced it. "Did you learn how to be soldiers? Or did that come naturally?" she demanded testily.

  Kiel looked thoughtful for a moment. "Some we learned."

  "Well, there you go! Now that you're used to it, you do it without having to think about it so, in a sense, it becomes natural. The same is true of everything all of us have learned from birth. We aren't born with social skills either. We're taught them as we grow up-some people, anyway. But I have to tell you that the people that don't learn social skills have problems in society, even if they're born into that society. Social inadequacy is a turn off to women. They want their children to be able to fit comfortably into society and that means that the men have to have social skills they can teach their young, too. They don't want a man who will undermine their attempts to provide their children with a good role model."

  She wasn't convinced that she'd actually made her point, but she decided it was enough for the moment. Maybe if she took baby steps, she wouldn't fuck everything up for them?

  Not that she saw that they had a lot to learn as far as their behavior in 'polite' company. They were already neat, polite, and courteous and well mannered-except for the tendency to punch one another-but then she had to consider the fact that they had an all male society. Even with military discipline, they still had the natural male aggression and territorialism issues to deal with, to say nothing of 'pecking' order.