The Rooster Club

by N. M. Catalano

  Natalie was cowered in the back as Zeta, the designer, unveiled the samples for the upcoming line for the new season. Everyone did their expected ‘Oohs’ and ‘Ahs’, showering her with compliments at her genius, and feeding into her already over-inflated ego.

  Natalie hated the hypocrisy. Everyone acted like they loved each other, but behind your back, they sharpened their knives, and stuck them in every opportunity they got, especially if it would benefit them professionally. Particularly with Zeta. No one ever had a respectful word to say about her, and Natalie actually almost pitied the woman.

  Natalie had to live through this hell for another few days. Ann was almost more than she could tolerate, but a whole salesforce was sure to make her lose her mind. She couldn’t even vent to the closet-queen Office Manager, Mark. She’d come to find out he was Ann’s little puppy, jumping and asking how far whenever she raised a perfectly manicured fingernail.

  By Friday, Natalie was ready to get so drunk, she’d throw-up her intestines.

  Natalie needed to blow off some steam, and she needed it bad.

  ***

  It was Michael’s birthday, and he was miserable. He’d almost forgotten it, and he would have if he hadn’t had to renew his driver’s license, the notice had been sitting on his desk for a month.

  Michael was in the middle of negotiations to buy a club. The furniture store was operating in very positive revenue brackets, but he was a firm believer in not putting your eggs all in one basket. He thought it left you vulnerable.

  The stress from his marriage, and the farce of it, had really started to take its toll on him, pushing him past limits he never knew he had. He had control over every part of his life, except this one.

  His ‘wife’ hadn’t even acknowledged his birthday. But honestly, he was glad. He hated the thought of pretending to be the happy family. His marriage had been over for a while, if it ever had been a marriage. Now, looking back, he wasn’t so sure. Granted, the sex had been great in the beginning. But that’s all they’d ever had, when he thought about it. He’d been a good husband and father. He never cheated on her, he adored his daughter, she was the only reason he’d stuck around this long. Michael knew Christina was unfaithful.

  That was a joke. She was a slut and he was fully aware of it. He should know because that’s how he used to be. It was as if he’d been a slave to his dick, he had no control over himself, no matter how much he hated it. Until he’d gotten married. He laughed. Karma was a vicious bitch. What did being faithful get him? Nothing but misery. But there was the one time…with Natalie. He’d wanted to get lost in her, and take her with him.

  Shame filled him at the memory of their last meeting.

  “Fuck!” he rumbled quietly.

  Every time he thought of the pained look in her eyes, it made him sick.

  ‘I’ve got to make it up to her,’ he thought.

  “It’s my birthday,” he said out loud. “I’ll take her out to tell her I’m sorry.”

  It was a good idea, if she didn’t tell him to go fuck himself first, which she had every right to do.

  Michael picked up the phone and dialed Vici’s number before he chickened out.

  Natalie was in such a foul mood, and it had gotten worse every hour of every day. She was almost ready to go off on everybody in that damn showroom, even Mr. Stein for letting them treat her like shit.

  Natalie had snuck off to her desk to hide, grateful for the somewhat detachment from all the negativity that had surrounded her for three days. She yanked the phone up on the first ring, taking her frustration out on it.

  “Vici,” she said, almost growling.

  “Wow, you’re having a bad day too?” Michael’s amused voice filled the line.

  Natalie’s heart skipped but not before she could stop the snide retort from popping out.

  “Yeah, and don’t say anything stupid to make it worse, Michael,” she warned him, smiling.

  “I wouldn’t dare,” he said with a hint of mischief.

  That softened her anger. No matter their past, he could still make her smile. The smoothness of his voice never failed to warm her, regardless of how pissed-off she was at him.

  “Good, because I won’t be held accountable for my actions. And with you, that could be severe,” she replied, gentler, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

  “It’s my birthday…,”

  “Oh, happy birthday!” Natalie’s mood lightened by the minute.

  “Thank you, and I’d like to take you out. Hopefully it will make both of our crappy days better,” he sounded so sincere, it melted her reservations.

  “Um, thank you I think? But isn’t that a little backwards,” she chuckled, her bad mood from work almost forgotten.

  “So what. I’m having a bad day, you’re having a bad day, let me take you out and make both our days better. I found this great Spanish restaurant downtown, you’ll love it. The food’s not as good as your moms, but it’ll be the next best thing,” he replied hopeful.

  Natalie felt the inferno she’d been raging in all week finally being put out with the sweet cool water she so desperately needed, soothing her charred edges. But there were still traces of the damage from all that had happened between them. Michael heard it in her hesitation.

  “Come on, Natalie, spend my birthday with me. Please.”

  She could hear a hint of pain in his voice, and that pushed her over the edge.

  “Ok, what’s the name and the address, and what time?” she gave in, both ecstatic and apprehensive.

  “It’s El Toro at 3rd Avenue and 12th Street. See you about 6:00?”

  “I’ll be there,” she answered him quietly.

  “Thank you, Natalie, I can’t wait to see you. It’ll be nice, I promise.”

  Natalie could hear the calm happiness in his voice, and she had to be honest, she couldn’t wait to see him.

  “See you later, then, Michael. Bye.”

  “Bye Natalie.”

  Natalie sat back in her chair, the sound of the murmured voices from the meeting still going on the other side of the wall behind her was forgotten. Warmth filled her, as it always did when it came to Michael. She allowed herself to feel the hum of excitement as she thought about meeting him. ‘I can’t believe I still feel this way about him,’ she thought as her heart raced and giddy bubbles rose up inside her.

  But the tragedy was she knew he was still married.

  Natalie arrived at El Toro at five minutes to six and as she walked up, she saw Michael standing at the bar through the window. His now sophisticated frame was clothed perfectly in a suit and silhouetted against the blue walls, illuminated by the soft white lights. Her steps slowed as she thought, ‘He’s still the same, but different.’ His stance was now more relaxed and confident, it seemed time had eased his restless spirit. But he still had that powerful sensuality and dark masculine dominance. She could tell some of his fire was gone, and that made her feel some remorse, imagining what had happened that had affected him so deeply. She wondered how she looked to him now, after these few years. She smoothed away the light misting that had clung to her hair as the same hunger coiled inside her as she entered the restaurant.

  There was a tumbler with golden liquid sitting in front of him at the bar half full. He turned at the sound of the door, and when he saw Natalie, his face lit up.

  Michael’s breath caught, like it always had. She was beautiful, regal, and she still mesmerized him.

  “Hi, thanks for meeting me,” he embraced her gently, and kissed her cheek.

  “How could I say no, it’s your birthday?”

  She was nervous and it showed in the pitch of her voice.

  “That was my plan,” he replied with his naughty grin.

  “You never change, do you?” she laughed as her nervousness began to ebb.

  Natalie shrugged off her trench-coat as he helped her, then he placed it on the back of the barstool he offered her.

  He laughed, “You can take the boy out of Brooklyn,
you know, but it’ll always be there.” He smiled softly, “You look beautiful, Natalie, but you always do.”

  “Thanks Michael, and you make that suit look good.”

  “What can I get you to drink? Our table will be ready in a few minutes.”

  “A Stoli and cranberry would be great, thanks.”

  They made small talk as electricity sparked between them, hidden behind the curtain of civility.

  A few minutes later the hostess led them to their table. His hand instinctually found its place on her back, claiming her the way he always did. Even in this city, they attracted the eyes of people in the room. Maybe it was the energy that flared between them. It had never died, but had only grown more powerful.

  He was right, the food was good, but the company was even better. He was more comfortable with himself; who he was, and where he was at, more so than she’d remembered. And it made her feel more comfortable being with him. There were no airs between them. He didn’t have to impress her, and she was no longer afraid she wasn’t the person he wanted. She didn’t worry about impressing him either anymore. They had a comfort level between them, one that only time allowed.

  Natalie told him about work, what she was going through, how she was struggling between doing her job and the pressure she was getting from everyone.

  “Keep doing what you’re doing, as long as you’re doing the right thing, nothing else matters,” he told her, confirming what she’d felt in her heart.

  “Thanks, I needed to hear it from someone else.”

  “So, was the food good?” he leaned closer and smiled at her.

  Being with her stirred all those old emotions inside him. But it was different. It was deeper. ‘God, she’s even more beautiful now,’ he thought. His soul ached and his body yearned to hold her, smell her, taste her, feel her skin against his. She did something to him that only she could.

  “Yes, as close to my mom’s as I’ve had yet. You were right,” she said, as his smile ignited new places inside her.

  “How are your parents?” he asked, placing his napkin on the near empty plate in front of him, his hand itching to stroke hers.

  “They’re good, they moved to North Carolina my senior year of high school and bought a restaurant, as a matter of fact. They seem happy,” she answered him as her body heated. Their bodies were having a conversation of their own, calling to each other with a yearning long overdue.

  “They hated me,” he laughed.

  “No they didn’t, my mother loved you, and God only knows why,” Natalie replied as she rolled her eyes at him.

  “She wouldn’t have if she’d known everything,” he smiled, shaking his head and lowering his eyes.

  “I don’t think she could have helped it,” she said as she thought, ‘Like me.’

  “Natalie, you’ve always been too good to me. And I was a total shit.”

  A melancholy hinted at ruining their perfect night. And she’d be damned if she’d let it.

  “Don’t Michael, let’s not go there. What happened can’t be changed, it’s in the past, and there’s nothing we can do about it now.”

  He let out a heavy breath, and she could see what was coming.

  “You know I’m still married.”

  He had to make sure he wasn’t hiding anything from her anymore, as much as he could stand to admit.

  “I know that,” she replied slowly.

  “But you, whatever we had…”

  “Michael, please don’t,” she looked at him pleadingly.

  “Natalie, I have to tell you something,” he said slowly.

  Natalie’s heart jumped. “What is it?”

  “I tried to call you a year after I left,” his voice was quiet.

  She sucked in a breath. “We were gone…,” it was almost a whisper.

  “I know…,” his voice was tight with pent-up emotion.

  ‘No, no, no, we were so close…,’ it hurt her to think it. She wanted to scream at the top of her lungs at how cruel life was.

  Each of them could see the struggle inside the other, but not wanting to put words to their thoughts.

  Michael wanted to ask her to wait for him, to give him time, the same things he’d wanted to say back in New Paltz. He wanted to explain to Natalie what his life was like, that he struggled everyday being married to Christina, knowing both of them hated it and wanted out, and only held on for the baby. But he didn’t say any of those things, for fear she would think he was lying.

  He went with what he knew, the one thing where he could show her how he really felt, give her all of him the only way he could…love her.

  “I want to be with you tonight, Natalie.”

  He took her hand and held it tightly in his across the table.

  Memories of their last time together in the shower flashed through Natalie’s mind. The intensity of that moment took her breath away, of how he claimed her, possessed her, and how she couldn’t hold anything back. Her body pulsed with the enormity of it. How he’d told her she was his, she’d always be his, and there wasn’t anything either one of them could do about it. His words still rang true.

  Natalie didn’t answer him. She wanted so badly to go with him, forget that he was married, and that when he left her he would go back to his wife, and how Natalie would go home, alone, without him again. She didn’t know if she could do it.

  “Come on, let’s get out of here,” he said quietly.

  Michael waited a moment for Natalie to say something, anything at all.

  Still nothing came out. She didn’t want this to end, wanting to see where it would go, hoping that finally it would lead to someplace different, besides where it always had.

  Her heartbroken.

  He paid the check and they left the restaurant. They walked quietly around the corner to where his car was parked. He opened the door for her, and as she was about to get in, he took her in his arms and kissed her. His body consumed her, pulling her in, as his mouth took hers with pent-up longing.

  Michael was a rumbling volcano of yearning, need, and passion. The desire to possess her, to show her how much she meant to him, was almost too much for him to take. His body shook inside with the force of it. He tried to ignore the nagging sensation in the back of his mind that something was standing between them.

  Natalie tried to lose herself in his kiss, let the wave consume her, searching for what they used to have. But something was in the way, like the barrier of her coat on her body.

  She wasn’t sure if he’d felt it too, that unseen thing that was between them. He didn’t say, and neither did she.

  He drove to The Plaza Hotel and parked on 57th Street.

  “Wait here, and I’ll get a room,” he said quietly.

  “Ok,” the word could barely be heard as it passed her lips.

  He leaned in and kissed her lightly, his lips brushing against hers, before he got out of the car. The slow burning fire inside her peaked with the touch of his lips. She watched him walk up the steps and into the elegant lobby as the uniformed doorman nodded his acknowledgement to Michael. A slight tremor went through her as she watched him walk, his image of a tall, commanding, utterly dark, sensually masculine male.

  As the minutes ticked by, her reservations grew louder and louder.

  An avalanche of emotions began its thunderous descent, slowly consuming her.

  “Oh God, I don’t think I can do this,” Natalie moaned.

  Fear, confusion, apprehension, all of them clawed at her at the same time. She wanted to run, everything yelled at her to get out of that car. Her gaze darted back and forth almost frantically. He’d left his keys in the ignition.

  ‘Shit,’ she thought, ‘I can’t leave the car here with the keys in it!’

  Finally, she saw him walking back. Relief and dread washed through her simultaneously.

  He got in and started the car.

  “I’ll find a parking space and we’ll go up,” he said as he pulled the car out and crossed 5th Avenue.

 
; “Michael,” Natalie croaked, “I can’t do this. I’m so sorry.”

  She couldn’t subject herself to another wound she was certain would be worse than any she’d suffered before. The devastation she knew that would follow one night in Michael’s arms when he left her to go back to his wife would be more than she could bear.

  He pulled over on the other side of 5th Avenue.

  “Natalie…,” he began as he reached for her hand.

  “I’m sorry, I have to go.”

  Natalie grabbed her purse and ran from the car, and didn’t look back.

  ***

  A few months passed and Michael didn’t call. He knew when Natalie left, it was the right decision, no matter how badly he’d wanted to love her, needed to drown her in it. His life was a mess and he was mistaken to want to drag her into it. He had to clean things up, it was only fair to her. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her again. He would call her when all the obstacles that stood between them were gone.

  Natalie went on with her life, and sometimes wondered what might have happened if she’d gone with him up to the room, trying to imagine a perfect night they would have spent together. But she knew deep down inside it wouldn’t have played out that way. She wasn’t sorry for not going with him. What she was sorry about was the wasted time they did have together, and how it had all gotten so terribly messed up.

  Their love, what they had, was a tragedy right from the beginning. What she felt for him was so passionate, so intense, it was bound to crash and burn.

  The business in North Carolina Natalie’s parents had started turned out to be a huge success, so much so, they couldn’t handle it alone. For months, they’d called her and begged for her to come and help them.

  Finally, after having had enough harassment for doing her job, she agreed, and packed up her things. She and her brother Vinnie drove down to the tiny little town on the North Carolina coast.

  Vinnie had married the girl from Little Italy in Manhattan shortly after he’d gotten out of high school. But after a few years, their marriage had ended and he was going to help their parents out too.

  What a miserable couple of people they were on that twelve hour ride.