Last Chance Beauty Queen

by Hope Ramsay

  Caroline’s face got hot as she flashed on an image of that tiny blood blister under Hugh’s thumbnail. Maybe he’d gotten it last night working on Bubba’s car. That blister made him seem so normal and ordinary. Like the kind of man she could actually call by first name.

  Boy, she really needed to watch herself. She needed to remember that Hugh was practically engaged to an heiress named Lady Ashton.

  Just then, Hettie Marshall clapped her hands and assumed her position as the mistress of ceremonies. “All right, ya’ll,” she said. “Welcome to the first annual kiss-off. I want to thank the single girls of Last Chance for volunteering their puckers.” Whistles and catcalls greeted this announcement.

  Caroline leaned toward Rachel. “And we went to college for this.”

  “Hush, Rocky, I’m almost looking forward to this.”

  “You are? Really?”

  She shrugged. “It’s better than worrying about the chicken plant.”

  Hettie continued with her discussion of the rules. “It’s five dollars a kiss,” she said. “So if you want to buy up the attention of any of these young ladies for the next two hours, you’ll have to spend at least two hundred dollars.”

  A number of college-age boys looked disappointed by this news.

  Hettie did not let their disappointment deter her. “We will begin the auction shortly, but before we do, I have to warn you that, just because you’ve bought a young lady’s attention does not mean you can manhandle her. If any of ya’ll start any funny business, you’ll have to answer to me. And Stone, of course.”

  Hettie nodded toward the Last Chance chief of police, who stood to one side, arms across his chest, a Stetson on his head and a real badass expression on his face.

  Caroline wanted to duck under the table and hide until it was over. Nothing good was going to happen here. She could feel it in her bones.

  Hettie opened the bidding. Not too surprisingly, Bubba’s hand immediately shot up. “I’ll bid two hundred and five dollars on Rocky.”

  Caroline’s stomach clutched. The crowd hushed.

  “I bid two hundred and five dollars for Rachel,” Hugh said. A little smile on his face.

  Huh? Where the hell did that come from? Everyone turned and stared at him. He smiled back. “What?” he said aloud. “She’s dishy.”

  “Dishy?” Drew Polk, Rachel’s younger brother, asked.

  “Well, I think you chaps would say she’s hot. Either way, she’s a very beautiful woman.”

  Rachel beamed at Hugh.

  Oh, great. Caroline didn’t want to think about the fallout when Rachel discovered that Hugh was about to go back to the UK and marry Lady Whatshername’s checkbook. The last time Rachel broke up with someone was three years ago. Her split with Justin had been legendary. Six years that jerk led her on and then finally told her he needed some space.

  And Rachel was the marrying kind. She’d been so devastated she’d given up her job in Columbia and come running home to her momma. Where she’d been ever since.

  Maybe this whole kissing thing would be okay for Rachel. Although Caroline didn’t really like the idea of Rachel kissing Lord Woolham.

  “I’ll bid two hundred and ten for Rachel.” This came from Dash.

  What the hell?

  “I’ll raise you ten,” Hugh said.

  “I’ll bid two-ten for Jessie Cooper.” This came from Roy Burdett, who was a married man and old enough to be Jessie’s father.

  Hettie scowled at him. “Roy, you’ll do no such thing.”

  “But—”

  Hettie gave him the evil eye, and Roy shut his trap.

  “Put me in for two-fifty for the lovely Ms. Polk,” Dash said.

  A murmur went through the crowd. Caroline’s face started to burn. God was punishing her. No question about it.

  “In that case, I’ll bid two-ten for Rocky,” Hugh said.

  Caroline turned and stared at him. He looked deadly serious standing there, like a cardsharp with an addiction for gambling. And he’d called her Rocky. The sound of her name seemed to awaken her girl parts.

  “You can’t do that. You’re bidding on Rachel.” Bubba turned around and glared at Hugh.

  “I most certainly can, old boy. And besides it’s for a good cause.”

  “You’re just jacking up the price, aren’t you?” Bubba grumbled.

  “I might be.”

  Bubba turned back to Hettie. “I’ll bid two-fifteen for Rocky.”

  “Well, I’ll just put an end to this competition and bid five hundred for the lovely Miss Rocky Rhodes,” Hugh said, and somehow hearing her name in his accent was okay. Her name didn’t sound like a joke when he said it. It sounded sexy as all get-out.

  “Hey, you can’t do that,” Bubba whined.

  “Of course I can. It’s an auction. Get in there and bid. If you can’t afford Rocky, there are at least half a dozen other lovely young ladies available. Although given what you told me last night about Rachel, I’d say this was your golden opportunity. And besides, remember what I said about reverse psychology.”

  Bubba nodded. “Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.” Bubba looked up. “I’ll bid two-fifteen on Rachel.”

  The crowed ooohed and aaahed.

  Caroline clutched Rachel’s arm. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry.”

  “It’s okay. Better I should kiss Bubba than we should have to endure another episode in the Rocky and Bubba Show.”

  “You’d do that for me?”

  “Honey, Bubba’s okay. He’s handsome and skilled at his job.”

  “Of course, the missing front teeth are kind of a problem.”

  “Those can be fixed.”

  The bidding on Jessie Cooper heated up. Randy Kent finally went over the top with his bid of three hundred dollars.

  The bidding seemed to be at its end, with only Rachel, Rocky, and Jessie going up for auction. Finally, Hettie turned toward Dash. “We’re waiting, Dash. You aren’t going to let his Lordship get away with Rocky now, are you?”

  Dash shrugged. “You know, Hettie, I’ve got this feeling that no matter what I bid, his Lordship is going to raise it. I could jack up the price a little bit, but that would probably demoralize Bubba. So I figure maybe the best thing all around is to snooker the outsider into giving us five hundred dollars cash money for the resurrection of the very thing he’s trying to destroy. I’d say that was a good afternoon’s work.”

  He smiled his cowboy smile at Hettie and then turned toward Caroline. “I’m sure you know how to handle a dude like this if he gets uppity, don’t you?” Dash asked.

  Hettie laughed out loud, and Caroline figured it may have been the first time she’d ever heard the Queen Bee of Last Chance laugh like that.

  “Dash Randall, you have a devious mind,” Hettie said. She turned back toward the assembled crowd. “Do I hear any more bids? I believe Bubba has bid two hundred and fifteen dollars for Rachel, and his Lordship has bid five hundred for Rocky, and Randy has bid three hundred for Jessie. Going once, twice, all right then.

  “Come on down here, gentlemen, and make your payments. We accept checks and credit cards. In the meantime, the rest of ya’ll can line up. All kisses are five dollars.”

  It took a few moments for the transactions to be completed, but the crowd was waiting in anticipation.

  “Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss,” the chant went up.

  Oh great, Caroline was never going to live this one down. What was it about the Watermelon Festival anyway? It was guaranteed to cause one embarrassing moment after another.

  Randy Kent, who was the son of one of Allenberg’s contractors, pulled Jessie up from her seat, took her into his young, ripped arms, and kissed the dickens out of her. It was a good thing Doc Cooper wasn’t there to see that boy give his daughter’s backside the tiniest of squeezes.

  “That’s enough, Randy,” Hettie said. Randy pulled away, and Jessie looked a little thunderstruck. He took her by the hand, and they walked away, heading in the direction of the Ti
lt-A-Whirl. Randy and Jessie were both juniors at Clemson. There was already talk about a wedding next June after graduation.

  Ah, young love.

  Now it was Bubba’s turn. He came over to where Caroline and Rachel were sitting. He gave Caroline a look that started out moony and then transformed into something else—a studied disregard. He turned toward Rachel and ducked his head in a bashful sort of way. He swallowed hard, like he was really nervous.

  “Hey, Rachel,” he said. “I don’t think I can kiss too good.”

  And Rachel, bless her heart, came to Bubba’s rescue. She stood up, looking as cute as a button in her girlish sundress, and took Bubba by the shoulders. She laid a big sloppy wet one right on the uninjured corner of his mouth.

  The crowd when wild.

  Bubba blushed. Rachel took him by the arm and half dragged him off in the direction of the fun house.

  Wow! Maybe Dash had consulted with Rachel on the whole help-Bubba-move-on-with-his-life plan.

  The crowd was hooting and hollering as Caroline turned back and looked right into the smoldering eyes of his Lordship, who was patiently awaiting his turn.

  “May I?” he asked, just like a man asking for a dance.

  He leaned in, and he captured her mouth in a tender and half-chaste kiss that rapidly morphed into a raging inferno.

  His lips devoured, his tongue plundered, his arms captured her around her middle and pulled her up into his chest so that her bosom had no place else to go. Then he bent her backward in one of those clenches that were always prominently featured on the cover of romance books.

  The Watermelon Festival faded into the background. The cheers and catcalls of the audience were drowned out by the roaring in Caroline’s ears. He tasted like every sweet, forbidden thing she’d ever eaten. She wanted to devour him, and damn the calories.

  Something—probably the sound of her brother’s voice saying, “That’s enough now”—broke the spell. She pushed back. Hugh made sure she was semisteady on her feet before he let her go.

  “Dash,” Hettie said as Hugh withdrew, “I think you may have seriously miscalculated.”

  Caroline blinked a few times, taking in the suddenly quiet crowd, the stern look on Stone’s face, the open mouths of Millie Polk and Thelma Hanks, and the perpetual twinkle in Miriam Randall’s eye.

  “I’m not worried,” Dash said. “I figure his Lordship is about as far from a regular guy who works with his hands as a man can get.” He glanced at his aunt. “And I have complete faith in Aunt Mim.”

  Rachel squinted in the semidarkness trying to read Bubba’s battered features. It was impossible. The lighting in the fun house was supposed to be dark and murky. There were couples stashed in several corners.

  “Gee, Rachel, you’re really taking this whole kiss-off thing to heart, aren’t you? Bubba said in a husky voice.

  Yes, she was. The fun house was the perfect place to indulge the fantasy of a lifetime. She’d been wanting to kiss Bubba Lockheart since she was fourteen. But of course, Bubba was sweet on Rocky, and Rocky was her best friend so she’d stayed away.

  And after Rocky dumped Bubba, there had never been a moment like this one, where Bubba had been interested in kissing anyone else.

  She pressed her lips gently to the corner of his mouth one more time, then she let her hands roam through his spiky hair and touch the texture of his beard and squeeze his totally ripped biceps.

  He was a god among men.

  He let go of a little groan and then, to her utter astonishment, Bubba reversed their directions and kind of pressed her up against the wall.

  His mouth didn’t seem to be all that damaged, it turned out. And time kind of ran away with them.

  “Uh, Rachel,” Bubba finally said against her cheek.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Why are you kissing me like this? Is it only because I bought them?” He sounded a little forlorn.

  “Um. Well.” Her voice stuck in her throat.

  “It is, isn’t it?”

  “No.” She said the word so fast she didn’t even think about it before it left her lips. She pulled back so she could look at him. In the black light, his T-shirt glowed purple, but his face was dark. “No, Bubba, it’s not because you bought them.”

  “But that’s just weird. I mean, you and me together. We’re not exactly made for each other, you know?”

  “Why do you say that?”

  He shrugged. “Your daddy is a banker and you finished college, and I’m just a mechanic.”

  “Yeah, but you’re the best mechanic in the county. And Daddy says that a good mechanic is worth his weight in gold.”

  Bubba chuckled. “Well, you tell him thanks when you see him.”

  “Anyways, you went to college, Bubba.”

  “I flunked out. Besides I only went to college so I could play football. And you know…”

  “Yeah. You shouldn’t have let Rocky break your heart like that.”

  His shoulders tensed. “You know, it really wasn’t like that,” he said.

  “What wasn’t like what?”

  “I mean folks always say that I flunked out of college because of what Rocky did, but that’s not what really happened.”

  “What happened?”

  “I partied. I messed up. I’m not real smart, and I wasn’t really big enough to be first string up in Clemson. I mean, I got up there and I hated it. I just wanted to come home and be me, you know?”

  She laughed. “Yeah, I know. I felt the same way when I was living in Columbia. Everyone thinks it was my breakup with Justin that sent me home. But the truth is, I told Justin I wanted to go home before we broke up. I didn’t like living in the city.”

  “You didn’t?”

  “Nope. I like living here, where everyone knows me.”

  “Yeah, me, too.”

  He pushed away from the wall where they’d been leaning. “You know it’s kind of dark in here for a conversation. You want to go get some funnel cakes?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  Bubba took her by the hand and half dragged her out of the dark. They stumbled through the rotating drum at the end of the fun house and back out into the light of day.

  They blinked at each other in the late afternoon sunshine. He looked battered but handsome, and somehow not nearly as unapproachable as he’d been an hour ago. She smiled at him, and he smiled right back, gap-toothed and all.

  The funnel cake stand was way down the curving midway, and Bubba took a shortcut to the left and down a row of trees along the stock pens and exhibition area. They got about halfway there before they encountered a few men in cowboy hats watching a group of 4-H foals.

  The men were talking and laughing together, and their voices carried on the wind, along with the unmistakable scent of barn animals.

  “I swear, Allen,” one of the men said, “she lit into me with every four-letter word in the book until I explained that the whole lasso scenario was merely a ruse to get Bubba to rethink his life.”

  Bubba stopped in his tracks and stared at the men across the small patch of scraggly summer grass that separated him from them. Rachel recognized the voice, and the men. It was Dash Randall with the Canaday twins.

  “C’mon, Bubba, let’s go.” Rachel tugged at his hand. He didn’t budge.

  “You don’t want to get into another fight. Not with Dash,” Rachel pleaded.

  Bubba stalked up to Dash, who suddenly realized that his words had been overheard. “You lassoed Rocky off that float because you wanted me to move on with my life?” he asked.

  “Uh, well, see, Bubba, it’s not so simple.” Dash looked just like a little kid who’d gotten caught sneaking Daddy’s cigarettes.

  “Yeah, so, explain?”

  “Well, it’s just that Rocky said that you needed something really big to rattle your cage, and I just figured that with Aunt Mim’s forecast for her and all, that if I lassoed her, well… Shoot, Bubba, you know how this town is. They gossip about everything.”

&nbs
p; Bubba frowned, and Rachel knew things were going to get out of hand. “C’mon, Bubba, how about some funnel cake?”

  Bubba ignored her. “Yeah, I know all about this town. And it seems to me you just let that fancy English dude pay five hundred dollars for Rocky, and you didn’t do a damn thing to stop him. How you think folks are going to take that?”

  “Well, I don’t know. I reckon there will be talk. Bubba, there’s always talk.”

  “Yeah, I know. And it’s always wrong.” Bubba pulled on the brim of his ball cap and stalked away, heading in the opposite direction of the funnel cake stand.

  A lump the size of a pecan lodged in Rachel’s throat. “Rocky had no idea you were going to lasso her, did she?” she said to Dash. “And she had no idea you were going to let that Englishman buy her.”

  Dash shrugged. “Nope, I reckon not. But Rocky’s tough. She can take care of herself.”

  “Right. You’re a jerk, Dash Randall, you know that?”

  And Rachel stalked off heading for the funnel cake stand. Maybe a big, heaping plate of the stuff would be enough to fill the suddenly gaping hole in her heart.

  Caroline sat in one of the Ferris wheel chairs grabbing the safety bar with all her might as the wheel moved back and upward one place and then rocked in the summer air.

  “Don’t tell me you’re afraid of heights,” Hugh said.

  She gave him a wild stare. He was going to seek payment for every one of those kisses he’d bought. And what better place for kissing than the Ferris wheel. The setup was corny and classic, and she had a horrible feeling she knew how it would end.

  She looked down. It wasn’t that far to fall… yet.

  “Uh, no, not really afraid of heights. I…” Her voice pinched with her confusion. “Look, I’m just not sure this is a good idea.”

  He looked around at the structure of the ride. “I don’t see any obvious structural defects.”

  She laughed in spite of herself. He was being adorable. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it. I was told that Dash had arranged to buy up my kisses. You weren’t supposed to bid for them at all. And you weren’t supposed to kiss me like that in front of everyone either. People don’t like to be surprised. Surprised people talk, and this time the gossip is going to be vicious. I’m so tired of being the talk of the town.”