Back Where You Belong

by Vonnie Davis

  “Life changes us sometimes.” She exhaled a long sigh. “And if I seem open, it’s because I get nervous around you and can’t seem to shut up. My mouth takes on a mind of its own and runs amuck.”

  “Personally, I think you have a very nice mouth.”

  His gaze focused on her lips, and she remembered how expertly his lips had moved over hers. Warmth spread through her chest and arrowed down to her most feminine of places. She wondered if he knew the extent of his male potency.

  “I guess Frank was happy to have you move back home.”

  The Rattlesnakes started warming up for their first set, and drew her attention for a moment. “Yes, I guess you could say we really needed each other when I came back.”

  “What just put those worry lines on that forehead of yours?” He leaned over to run a long finger over them.

  “Grandpa. I worry about him, just like Olivia worries about you, I guess.”

  “Why, is he dating someone special, too?”

  He winked at her, charming her even more.

  “I wish.” She chuckled. “Although he was flirting with Polly Fitzhugh at the rodeo last week. Maybe I need to invite her over for supper one night. Make myself scarce after we eat.” The idea took hold, and she liked it. Grandpa and Polly might make a nice couple.

  “Playing matchmaker like Olivia?”

  She wiped her mouth with her napkin. “Ouch. Not a good thing, huh?”

  His hand covered hers. “Hey, I didn’t mean anything by that remark. Personally, Olivia and I are of the same mind. We both want you in our lives.”

  She allowed his words to sink in—the scope and the beauty of them. Was she being too hopeful they might have a future? She’d come to care for Olivia. As for Tyler, she’d always cared for him; that much she knew. But could a teenaged infatuation mature into a strong, abiding love like her grandparents shared?

  One of Tyler’s badass smiles blossomed. “Did I strike you speechless?”

  Oh, if you only knew. “I…ah…I think I’ll go to the ladies’ room to freshen up.” If in doubt on how to handle a remark, run.

  A few minutes later, Lacy was in a stall, smoothing her skirt and adjusting her camisole when she heard the restroom door open. Two different sounding heels clicked on the tile floor.

  “Did you see Lacy’s here tonight?”

  Megan? I’ll have to tell her I hired her aunt.

  “Yeah, I saw her making eyes at that guy she threw the dart at a few weeks ago.”

  That sounds like Tessa.

  “By the looks of the two of them, it musta been a love dart.” Both ladies laughed. “I wonder if he’s seen the internet video of her?”

  Lacy’s mouth dropped open, and she covered it with her hands. If Tessa knew, she’d make sure everyone else would, too. Her heart sank. Tyler would be humiliated.

  “What video?” Megan asked.

  “LaAss LaRoche. Haven’t you seen it? Oh, my God, it was a video of her undressing. Buck naked on the internet, baby. Can you believe it?”

  “Oh, no. Not Lacy?”

  “Oh, yeah, cottage cheese ass and all. Geesh, what a figure she had back then. If someone ever made a video of me like that I’d crawl in a hole and die. I’m telling you, if Lacy ever wanted to haul ass, she’d have to make two trips.” Tessa snorted and laughed.

  “Don’t talk about her like that. She’s a good friend. Besides, she’s lost a lot of weight.”

  “Not enough. You gotta see that video. It’s had over a million hits.”

  “I’m not looking at it. That’s awful. Poor Lacy. I can’t imagine her humiliation.”

  Fisted hands covered her eyes and Lacy took a couple deep, shuddering breaths. Oh God, to be the topic of restroom gossip. Outrage warred with embarrassment. She’d sooner keep the video a secret, but the internet being what it was made that desire a worthless pipe dream. Two years ago, she’d have run and hidden in tears. Now she was of a mind to face it head on, if she had her “druthers,” as grandma used to say.

  Squaring her shoulders, she opened the door and stepped out to face two shocked women. “Hey, Megan. Tessa.”

  Megan’s face blushed all the way to her auburn hairline. “We didn’t know you were…Lacy, I…I’m sorry.” She extended her hands, palms up. “Why didn’t you tell us about the video? You, Carrie Jo and I have been close since our sophomore year of high school. Girlfriend, you know we’d have been on your side.”

  Tessa rolled her eyes.

  Lacy turned on the faucets and washed her hands. “I was too ashamed, I guess. Having your bare backside go viral and hearing people I thought were my friends laughing about it was more than I could handle back then.” She grabbed two paper towels from the wall dispenser and dried off.

  Her long-time friend stepped closer and touched her arm. “We weren’t laughing at you just now.”

  “No, you weren’t.” She glared at Tessa, who glanced away.

  Leaving the restroom, Lacy assessed her options. She could try to keep her past a secret, which meant looking over her shoulder for the rest of her life. Or she could be upfront with Tyler and tell him everything, no matter how difficult that would be.

  Shoulders tensed as she gathered courage to share the facts. Where would she start? How could she make him understand? Would he want her in his and Olivia’s lives after she told him?

  Chapter Twelve

  Tyler stood as Lacy approached. Something was wrong. Her sunbeam smile was gone and her features seemed tense. Had his remark about wanting her in his life upset her? His stomach clenched. Maybe they weren’t of the same mind on a possible future together. Had he misread her attentions while he was recovering in the hospital?

  He pulled her chair out for her.

  “Sorry I was so long. I ran into a couple friends.” She kept her head down, and he barely caught her next few words. “Or people I thought were friends.”

  He sat and took one of her hands in his. “You want to explain that?”

  She slid her hand from his and began fiddling with the used paper napkin she laid next to her plate earlier. Should he ask her what was wrong or give her time? At what point did concern cross the line into being pushy?

  Finally, she nodded and mumbled, “So be it.” Her gaze swept to his, and she picked up her discarded napkin. “I have something to share that won’t be easy. So, bear with me.”

  “Okay. Take your time, Sugar.” What was this about? Was she going to tell him she didn’t want to date an older man with a teenaged daughter?

  The waitress came by to clear away their dessert plates, and he ordered two more drinks.

  Lacy held onto her napkin, as if she needed something in her hands. “This goes back two years ago.”

  Good. Maybe this didn’t pertain to him, to them.

  “Grandpa was very depressed after Grandma passed. More so than I realized. After all, they’d been married for forty-seven years. When I came home for Christmas my senior year of college, the place was a mess. So was he.” She repeatedly wrapped the napkin around her index finger while she talked.

  He leaned in, creating an intimate distance between them to make it easier for her to carry on a conversation over the din of the bar. “In what way?”

  “He just sat around. He’d given up on life. The ranch was falling apart around him, and he didn’t seem to care. Everything was a mess.” She tore the napkin in half.

  “So you moved back after graduation?”

  “Before, actually. I made special arrangements to finish my required classes online. Things at college…weren’t going so well.” The napkin was torn again. “I took the chicken way out and ran home.” Her mouth twitched as if she were fighting to retain control of her emotions. She took a deep breath as she shredded the napkin. “I came home to take care of him, and to lick my wounds, I guess.”

  By his estimation, she was trying to hang onto composure. Her voice was shaking as if she were scared to death to tell him. What was it that ate at her like this? He placed
his forearms on the table. Should he ask? Or would that be crossing the line? The pile of torn napkin pieces rose.

  “What wounds, Lacy?”

  Her eyes blinked as they pooled with tears. Damn, it seemed she was losing the battle.

  Nervous fingers tore at what remained of the napkin. “This is something I suppose you should know. I haven’t talked about it since I left the university.” She reached in her purse for a tissue and dabbed her eyes. “I’m sorry. I should be over it by now.”

  Tyler was surprised at how much it hurt him to see her deal with whatever plagued her. What was so troubling? A romance gone bad? His gaze swept to the growing pile of shredded napkin. What could he do to help this woman who was growing more special by the minute?

  As the band started their next number, Tyler stood and extended his hand. “Come on, dance with me.”

  She wiped away the tears. “You can’t dance with a sprained ankle.”

  He made a beckoning motion with his fingers. “We’ll keep our movements to a minimum. I think you need to be held while you cry.”

  “Is this another one of those male-female relationship things?” She stood, clutching her tissue.

  Once they’d walked the few steps to the dance floor, he wrapped an arm around her waist and drew her near. The discomfort wasn’t too bad, but he’d have born any pain to ease whatever bothered her.

  She snuggled into him, and he pressed her face to his shoulder. “What is it you think I have to know?” he whispered in her ear. “I’m not one of those men who needs a rundown of a woman’s past loves.”

  “A list of one wouldn’t take long to share.”

  He kissed her temple, enjoying the feel of her in his arms as they swayed from side-to-side. Even though he couldn’t dance, he could hold her close, making it easier to hear her words. Maybe, just maybe, he could help her open up about this problem, whatever it was. “Tell me.”

  “I wish I didn’t have to.” A shudder went through her. “I’m afraid it might change all the beautiful feelings growing between us. But I won’t be less than honest with you.”

  He pulled back and stared down at her for a beat. Wasn’t her honesty one of the many things he valued about her? “Take your time, then.”

  She took a deep breath as if reaching for a strong dose of courage. “I had this really neat roommate my first three years of college in Florida. We were the best of friends. We also liked to eat too much. Junk food was our combined weakness. I gained the ‘freshman fifteen’ and then some. And then some more.”

  He leaned down and placed another kiss on her temple. “I told you, I like you the way you are.”

  “Yes. Yes, you did. I’m not sure if I believe it, but it’s sweet of you to say so.”

  “I never say anything I don’t mean.” He held her close, his thighs touching hers as he slowly turned her into a gentle Texas two-step.

  “My roommate got married and didn’t come back for her senior year.”

  “Seems like a waste. To get so close and then quit.”

  She nodded. “My new roommate and I were not compatible at all. Zoe was into partying. Life was a joke for her. I’d already gotten the party mentality out of my system and was focused on my studies. She threw insults and called me names—”

  “Why?” His hand swept up her back, hoping to comfort her.

  “Because of my weight. She was thin and beautiful. And in her words, I was ‘the fat cow.’”

  “Stupid woman. What did she know?”

  Lacy turned so her lips were near his ear. He inclined his head so he could hear.

  “One…one day she set up a mini-cam in our dorm room and recorded me undress—” She cleared her throat. “Undressing…all the way.”

  His steps faltered for an instant before he settled back into their gentle rhythm. Well, hell.

  “Then she…she posted the video on the internet, and it went viral. There’s a naked video of me out there, for everyone to see, and laugh at.”

  He muttered a long string of curses and kissed her forehead. If only he could have saved her from the cruelty of this woman.

  “Everywhere I went, I was the target of jokes and snide remarks. My first instinct was to run home and hide. But I remembered Grandpa telling me nothing good ever came from running away. So I toughened it out until I realized how much he needed me here.” She shook her head. “God, it was an awful time. Just knowing my classmates—and strangers around the world—were looking at me taking off my clothes was humiliating, to say the least.”

  He rested his chin on her head and sighed. “Oh, Sugar.”

  She burrowed into him. “The video even had a title—‘LaAss LaRoche.’”

  He squeezed her. “Took a lot of guts to stay and face everyone. Did you have anyone to talk to?”

  “No one. I wanted to call Megan and Carrie Jo here in Texas, but I was too embarrassed. I never felt so alone and so ugly in my whole life.”

  “What about your grandpa?” Frank would have kicked ass and taken names. For all his blustery ways, he adored his granddaughter.

  She shook her head. “No. He was grieving too much for Grandma. Besides he doesn’t understand how the internet works. How it can be used for good, and for bad.”

  The slow song ended, and the Rattlesnakes began a lively number. Tyler escorted her back to their table. He collapsed into his chair.

  “I have to admit, I’m glad to be off my feet, although I do miss the feel of you in my arms.” He took her hand and kissed it. “Did you contact school officials? Didn’t anyone on campus help you?”

  “I went to the department head that handles such problems. He asked me for proof. I told him the video was proof enough. When he called Zoe in to question her, she claimed it was a prank I’d agreed to and then changed my mind about once it went viral. She was more believable telling a lie than I was telling the truth.” She sipped at her drink and returned the glass to the table. “I contacted the website, told them the video was taken against my knowledge and posted against my will.” Trembling hands pushed curls back from her forehead. “They promised to take it down, but…” Her shoulder lifted as her voice trailed off.

  “Well hell. I’ve heard of cyber-bullying, and that some kids have even committed suicide over it. Never knew anyone who was the victim of it before. Must have been tough.”

  She nodded and looked away, as if she still couldn’t face him. “The taunting, the jeers, the laughter. I didn’t think it would ever end.” A large shuddering breath escaped. “It still hasn’t ended. I had a customer email me the other day with a link to the video, asking if this was me. Having your painful past slapped into your face isn’t very pleasant, especially when you’re trying to build a business.”

  He ran a hand down his face. Dear God, how had she endured all this with no one to confide in, no one to share the bad times with her. His respect for her grew ten-fold. “People who know you won’t care about the actions of some loathsome bitch. I mean it, Lacy.”

  She ran her fingers through her curls and blew out a breath, as if the telling of it all had drained her. “Do you think we could leave?”

  “Sure, let me settle the check, and we’ll go.” He motioned for their waitress. All the while his gaze kept flitting back to her.

  How could he help her get over this?

  Large raindrops splattered on the gravel when they stepped outside into the quiet of the night. Off in the distance, a storm rumbled. A large jagged spear of lightning attacked the sky. Tyler huddled her into him as they dashed for his pickup. He opened the door for her and helped her in, his demeanor one of gentleness, as if she were a fragile piece of artwork.

  Once he was settled behind the steering wheel, he reached for her hand. “You okay?”

  “I’m fine.” Really, what could she say that he’d want to hear? That having her bare behind viewed by millions was so humiliating it haunted her in her sleep? That as a woman exposed, her emotions were scraped raw from the abrasive loss of her self-dign
ity? That the security she felt from being home again had just been snatched from her, too? No, he wouldn’t want to hear any of that. Nor could she make him understand.

  He released her hand and fastened his seatbelt.

  Her cell phone chimed at an incoming text. She pulled it from her purse and checked. Megan, apologizing. Not wanting to deal with it, she shoved the phone back into her purse.

  As he started the truck and backed out of the parking spot, she turned her head and stared at the rain pelting the side window, replaying the overheard conversation in the restroom. It certainly wasn’t the first time she’d listened in on conversations about the video. There’d been whispers behind her back in the classrooms, in the hallways as she passed by, in the cafeteria and the tables in the library. Signs plastered on the dorm hallways and cafeteria. She swiped at a falling tear. How many hundreds of emails had she received with the video’s link in it? Would she ever escape the never ending embarrassment?

  Another text chimed its arrival, and she ignored it, too. Megan, no doubt.

  She’d thought coming back home would end this emotional torture. So much for that erroneous idea. And so much for keeping the video quiet. She swiped at a last tear and crossed her arms under her chest. It was time she dealt with it. As long as she kept hiding, this relentless nightmare would never end. She exhaled a shaky sigh, pressed her head against the headrest and turned to look at Tyler.

  “I was raised to believe you had to live with the consequences of your actions. If you did something wrong, you had to pay the price.”

  He glanced at her. “Don’t do the crime if you don’t wanna do the time.”

  “Exactly. But I’m paying for someone else’s bad behavior. And, frankly, I’m getting damned tired of it.” That video had taken so much from her. First, her feeling of self-worth and enjoyment of college, and now her good name, and possibly the greatest loss of all—this man beside her. He was so respected, so stable. While she was a continual joke, a laughing stock. Having her name associated with his would only bring him shame.