The Healing Quilt

by Wanda E. Brunstetter

  “We’ll do something fun after the class,” he said. “I want to be here to see how things go, and maybe help out if I’m needed.”

  She grunted. “I thought the Millers were teaching the class.”

  He tweaked the end of her nose. “They are, smarty, but I want to be there in case Emma and Lamar get busy and someone has a question or needs extra help.”

  Star rolled her eyes. “Someone, like Kim?”

  He shrugged. “Maybe.”

  Star opened her mouth as if to respond, but Emma called to them from the kitchen. “If you two are ready, breakfast is on the table.”

  Jan nudged Star’s arm. “Guess we’d better get in there. We can talk later.”

  Noreen’s hands felt clammy as she gripped the steering wheel. She dreaded going to the Millers’ house for the fifth quilting class, because she hated the thought of seeing B.J. again. And knowing Todd and Kara would be here next week made her all the more apprehensive. If only they would wait to come for a visit until B.J. went back to Chicago. I should be dancing on air knowing that my son and his wife are coming for a visit. Instead, I’m dreading it, Noreen fumed. The more she thought about it, the more upset she became. Bruce Jensen is messing everything up. I shouldn’t be surprised, though; he’s good at it.

  “I know one thing,” Noreen barked, hitting the steering wheel to affirm her decision. “No matter how much prying B.J. does, he will never know about Todd!”

  She looked in the rearview mirror, and grimaced at her reflection. Since B.J. had seen her hair last week when her turban fell off, she figured there was no point in wearing it again today, as he might say something about it in front of the others.

  I don’t know why I care what he thinks or doesn’t think, Noreen scolded herself. Besides, she’d seen her hairdresser this week, gotten her hair cut, and had some highlights put in, which had toned down the black a bit. Her hair wasn’t to her liking yet, but at least it looked better than when she’d first put that awful color in.

  Glancing at her gas gauge, Noreen realized she’d let her tank get low, so she pulled into the nearest gas station. It wasn’t like her to let it go below half. Her only excuse was that she’d been under so much stress and wasn’t thinking clearly or paying attention to details, the way she normally did.

  Noreen got out of her car, and as she pumped the gas, she thought about the class reunion she’d been invited to attend this evening. Ever since she’d dyed her hair, she’d struggled with whether to go or not. Through all Noreen’s years of teaching, her hair had never been as dark as it was now. But was that a good reason to stay home? Most likely, the students wouldn’t remember how her hair had looked back then, unless they got out their class yearbooks and checked out the teachers’ photos.

  If I don’t go, I will miss seeing some of my old students, and any of my coworkers who might also be there, she told herself. No, I’m going, even if I look like an old fool. Even if just for a few hours, maybe the enjoyment of seeing everyone again will take my mind off everything else that’s been happening in my life lately.

  When B.J. arrived at the Millers’, Noreen was just getting out of her car. He fully intended to ask her about Judy’s son again, but by the time he’d gotten out of his car, she was already on the porch. He noticed everyone’s vehicles were there, and most likely, the other quilters were waiting for them. Even so, while he had this opportunity, B.J. wanted to try once more to get some answers from Noreen.

  Maybe Emma won’t answer the door right away, and I’ll get to Noreen before she goes into the house, B.J. thought as he made his way slowly across the yard. He was more tired than usual today and couldn’t walk as fast as he normally did. There was no doubt that his illness was taking a toll on him, and he was powerless to stop it.

  “Please don’t start badgering me again,” Noreen snapped when B.J. stepped onto the porch. “As I told you before, I don’t know where Judy’s son is, and I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I just hope you can live with the fact that you took advantage of an innocent girl.” Her mouth quivered. “If Judy hadn’t gotten pregnant, she’d still be alive today.”

  “You don’t know that,” B.J. shot back, taking deep, deliberate breaths to slow his racing heart. “People die from many causes.” Like cancer, he mentally added, gripping the porch railing, so he wouldn’t lose his balance.

  Now don’t let me fall apart in front of Noreen. B.J. willed his weakened body to keep going, as he fought to overcome a dizzy spell.

  Noreen turned her back on him and said nothing, just knocked on the door.

  “I know you blame me for your sister’s death, and if there was anything I could do to change the past, I surely would. Please try to understand,” he implored. “Judy and I were both young, and I was still living under my parents’ roof. I was just a teenaged boy, but if I’d known about everything, I wouldn’t have left like I did. Please listen to me, Noreen.” B.J. didn’t like talking to someone’s back, especially when they gave no response, but he continued anyway. “What teenage kid doesn’t make mistakes? I’m not trying to make excuses for myself, but I had no idea about any of what happened. Not about Judy being pregnant, her having the baby, or about her death.”

  Noreen continued to ignore him and was practically pounding on the Millers’ front door.

  “Just try to put yourself in my place, Noreen,” B.J. said, hoping she would finally realize what it was like for him to find out about his and Judy’s child after all these years.

  Noreen turned around suddenly, and looked as if she were about to say something, when Emma, with her usual cheery smile, opened the door. “Good morning. I’m glad you’re both here.”

  When they entered the house, Emma looked at Noreen and her eyes widened. “Oh, you’ve done something different with your hair.”

  Noreen’s cheeks turned pink. “Uh, yes. I changed the color and had it cut a bit shorter.”

  As worn out as he felt, B.J. stifled a laugh, and then hastily coughed to cover it up. Emma’s shocked expression said it all. But she didn’t laugh, either—just invited them to join the others at the table. Even in his own misery, B.J. could still find humor in this situation, and he couldn’t wait to see the reaction of the other quilters when they saw Noreen’s hair.

  C

  HAPTER 33

  It’s good to see you all here,” Emma said as she looked at everyone seated around her table. “I hope each of you have had a good week.”

  A few heads bobbed, but Noreen, looking as if she had eaten a sour cherry, said nothing, and neither did B.J., who sat with his shoulders slumped and head down. It tugged at Emma’s heartstrings, making her wish once again that there was something she could do to help these two. But she didn’t want to be pushy. If they wanted her or Lamar’s help, surely they would ask.

  “We had an interesting Friday,” Kim spoke up with enthusiasm. “Jan saved a boy from drowning.”

  “Really? Wow! Tell us about it,” Jennifer said, leaning forward with a wide-eyed expression.

  Jan shrugged his shoulders. “It was nothin’ really. Just did what most anyone woulda done.”

  “You’re being modest,” Lamar interjected. “Out of everyone on the beach, you were the only one who swam out to rescue the boy. You gave it no thought, just jumped into action.”

  “That’s right, and you could have drowned in the process,” Kim said.

  “Well, I’m perfectly fine, and so is the boy.” Jan smiled at Kim. “And don’t forget, you and Star took turns reviving the kid till the paramedics got there.”

  “Who’s Star?” Erika asked.

  “She’s my daughter,” Jan replied. “She flew down here from Indiana so we could spend some time together, see some sites in Florida, and visit our friends, Emma and Lamar.”

  “By the way, where is Star today?” Kim questioned. “I thought she might join our quilting class.”

  “She took my bike and headed out to see what Sarasota’s all about.”

  “
It’s a shame she didn’t stick around. Didn’t you say she was in the quilting class you took, Jan?”

  He nodded.

  “I invited her to join us,” Emma said, “but she said she’d rather do something else.” Emma gestured to the wall hangings everyone had begun quilting the previous week. “I think we’d better get busy now and continue with the quilting process. Since next week is our final class, we’ll do the binding that day, and then you can take home your finished projects.”

  Mike cleared his throat before speaking. “Phyllis called last night, and she’ll be coming home on Monday, so she’ll be able to attend the class next Saturday.”

  “That will be nice,” Emma said, smiling. “Then you can show her everything you’ve learned about quilting.”

  “I’d thought about just letting her take my place but changed my mind,” Mike said. “Something happened this past week that made me realize I don’t spend enough time with my wife. I’m gonna change all that when Phyllis gets home. There’s a lot of lost time to make up for.”

  While everyone quilted, Jan sat beside Kim, watching as she moved her needle in and out of the material like she’d been doing it all her life. Wish I didn’t have to go home a week from Monday, he thought with regret. I’d like to stay longer and spend more time with Kim. I could check with Terry, I guess. If we don’t have any houses to roof in the next few weeks, maybe I could hang around Sarasota awhile longer.

  Jan stroked the ends of his beard as he contemplated the idea. But then Star has to get back to her job, so unless she’d be willing to fly back to Indiana alone rather than riding home with me, I don’t see any way I can stay here longer. Maybe I’ll discuss it with her later today.

  Jan’s thoughts took him back to the quilting classes he’d taken with Emma’s first group of students. It had been during their fifth class that he’d learned Star was his daughter. And now, being here in this quilt class had brought another special person into his life. He fixed his gaze on Kim once more and smiled. She really was a special gal.

  At eleven o’clock, Emma excused herself to get refreshments, and Lamar went with her. They returned several minutes later with some chocolate chip cookies and a tray with crackers and cheese.

  “Delicious as usual,” Jan said, biting into one of the cookies and smacking his lips.

  Noreen rolled her eyes. That man is so ill-mannered. I don’t understand what pretty little Kim sees in him. She accepted the cup of tea Emma handed her. Each to his own, I suppose, but a man like that would never appeal to me.

  She glanced at B.J. I can’t believe I was actually attracted to that man when I met him at the first quilting class. But not anymore. My sister was sure taken with him, though, and I’m not sure why. Of course, he was much younger then, and from what Judy said, he was quite good-looking. It’s strange, but B.J. looks much older today than he did on the first day of our class.

  Noreen studied B.J.’s face, noting the dark circles beneath his eyes, which appeared almost sunken today. Maybe he hasn’t been sleeping well lately, she thought. Or perhaps he isn’t taking good care of himself.

  “Oh Emma,” Kim spoke up, “I brought that old ring I told you about yesterday—the one I found on Lido Beach.”

  Emma moved closer to where Kim sat, on the left side of Noreen. “Oh yes, that’s right. I’d like to see it.”

  Kim reached into her tote bag and withdrew a small box. Then she opened it and handed a ring to Emma.

  “You’re right,” Emma said, turning it over in her hand. “I see some initials engraved in the band. It’s hard to make them out, since they are pretty worn, but it looks like the letters B and W.”

  Noreen almost choked on her tea when she heard what Emma had said. “Why, those were my husband’s initials. May I see the ring?”

  Emma looked at Kim, and when she nodded, she handed Noreen the ring.

  Noreen studied it a few seconds and gasped. “This was my husband’s! He lost it in the sand a few weeks after we moved to Sarasota.” Tears welled in her eyes. “I would know this ring anywhere, and I can’t believe you found it.”

  “Wow! What are the odds of that happening? I can’t fathom it myself.” Kim left her seat and held out her hand to Noreen. “Here you go. Take the box, too.” She paused a moment, then quickly added, “You don’t know how close I came to advertising the ring in the Lost and Found section of the newspaper.”

  “Thank you so much. I can’t begin to tell you how much this means to me,” Noreen said with feeling. “After we’d gone back to the beach the next day to see if we could find Ben’s ring and then searched for hours, we finally gave up. We thought it was lost forever, or that someone might have found the ring and kept it.” She sniffed and wiped the tears from her cheeks. “Oh, this has truly made my day.”

  “I think Kim finding it was meant to be,” Emma said, patting Noreen’s shoulder.

  “That’s right,” Lamar agreed. “God works in mysterious ways.”

  “We’ve been blessed this week, too,” Jennifer put in. “Someone left us a lot of baby things, but we don’t know who to thank for it.”

  “Some people like to do things in secret, and they don’t want any thanks,” Jan said, reaching for another cookie.

  “Would anyone care for some cheese and crackers?” Emma asked, motioning to the other tray.

  “I’ll take a few,” Mike responded. “Now that I’m restricted from eating a lot of sugary things, other foods that are better for me taste pretty good.”

  Emma handed the tray to Mike, and after he’d taken a few crackers, she passed it to Erika. “I’d rather have a cookie,” the young woman said.

  “Here you go.” Jan passed the cookie plate down to Erika.

  “What about you, B.J.?” Emma asked. “Would you like crackers or cookies?”

  B.J. shook his head. “No thanks, I’m not really…” His words were cut off when a coughing fit overtook him. He quickly pulled a hanky from his pocket and held it over his mouth.

  “Are you okay? Would you like a glass of water?” Emma asked, wearing a look of concern, as did everyone else in the class. Even Noreen thought his cough sounded pretty bad.

  He lowered his hand, and Noreen gasped when she saw a splotch of blood in his hanky.

  “Oh my! B.J., you’re bleeding!” Kim exclaimed.

  B.J. nodded slowly and looked from person to person, stopping at Noreen and holding her gaze. “I have cancer.” He paused and drew in a quick breath. “Short of a miracle, it won’t be long till I’m dead.”

  C

  HAPTER 34

  After B.J.’s surprise announcement, the whole room went silent, filled with strong emotions. He hadn’t meant to blurt out that he was dying. If I just hadn’t coughed up blood, he thought with regret, no one would have been any the wiser. Now he had to deal with their sympathetic expressions as they processed the idea that one of their fellow quilting students would soon be checking out of this world.

  B.J. almost knew how they felt and experienced sorrow for them in the awkwardness of the moment. He was sure they probably felt the same way, only for a different reason. Realizing that the outcome of his cancer was coming sooner, rather than later, was still hard for him to grasp, even after all this time. It wasn’t fair. Lately, there’d been some days that B.J. thought for certain would be his last. But on other days, everything seemed right with the world, and it felt like his cancer was just a bad dream.

  Thinking back, he realized that he’d wasted a lot of time moaning and groaning about having a bad cold or the twenty-four-hour flu. If he’d only known then what he knew now. Unfortunately, he understood the meaning of misery, and not just the part about having cancer. Maybe though, in spite of everything, there was a little ray of sunshine. B.J. wasn’t sure why this had happened, but for weeks now, his senses had become more heightened. Could it be because his spirit knew there was so little time left? Like this morning when B.J. witnessed a beautiful sunrise. If it hadn’t been for the need to get to th
e quilt class, he would have gathered up all his art supplies and headed to the beach to capture more clearly the morning’s rosy dawn on canvas.

  Ironically, B.J.’s favorite song from when he and Judy had dated was playing on the radio this morning. Even after all these years, he hadn’t forgotten a single word of those lyrics. Were these little signs of awareness a clue that his death was closer than he thought? It just couldn’t be. Not yet, anyway. B.J. needed more time. He had to say good-bye to his daughters, and he really wanted to find his son.

  “I’m sorry to hear about your illness,” Lamar said, moving across the room and placing his hands on B.J.’s shoulders. “We had no idea you were dealing with health issues, but now that we know, we will certainly be praying for you.”

  Emma bobbed her head in agreement, obviously left speechless with this news about one of her quilters.

  “If you knew you were sick, how come you left your home in Chicago and came to Florida?” Mike questioned.

  “It was on my bucket list,” B.J. replied. “And when I got here and found out about the quilt class, I decided I’d like to make a wall hanging to give my only granddaughter. Hopefully, it’ll be something she can remember me by.”

  “I’m surprised your daughters didn’t talk you out of coming,” Kim commented. “If I’d been sick when I left home, my parents would have pitched a fit.”

  B.J. drew in a couple of shallow breaths. “Neither of my girls knows that my cancer is terminal. When I left home, they thought I was doing better—that my cancer was in remission.”

  “So you lied to them, huh?” The blunt question came from Erika, who as usual, had kept pretty quiet during the first half of the class.

  B.J. shook his head. “I didn’t actually lie. Just didn’t tell them the whole truth.”

  “My dad always says when you know something important but keep it from someone, it’s the same as lying,” Erika said.