The Sleepover Club Bridesmaids

by Angie Bates

  I do my best to keep up with the styles (which isn’t easy when you live in a dump like Cuddington). But so far as I could see, Amber was in a completely unique style category of her own. She was totally, devastatingly perfect.

  Finally Mum and Jilly stopped hugging each other and Mum registered that I was still standing there, lost for words. “Well, say hello to Amber, darling,” she said.

  Adults can be so tactless. Personally, I’d have thought it was bad enough having perfect Amber see me with my pink-rimmed rabbity eyes, without Mum carrying on like I was some sulky little kid. But there you go.

  I scowled. “Give me a chance,” I hissed. Nice one, Fliss, I thought immediately. That made you look extremely mature.

  Then Amber did something which really showed me up. She stuck out her perfectly manicured hand and gave me a dazzling smile. “Hi,” she said. “You must be Fliss. I’m Amber.”

  “Hi,” I mumbled, feeling a real wally.

  As you can see, Amber and I hadn’t exactly got off to a flying start. But I reassured myself we’d make up for it, as soon we were on our own.

  I hung about politely, while Mum and Andy showed our guests over the house and demonstrated the power shower – you know the kind of thing. And at last Mum said, “Fliss, we won’t be eating till quite late. Maybe you could take Amber on a grand tour of Cuddington? You could introduce her to your friends.”

  I knew this was blatant mother-type code for “We’re dying to have a juicy gossip so let’s get you girls out of earshot!” But the words were music to my ears.

  “Would that be OK with you, Amber?” I asked shyly.

  “Sure,” said Amber, without enthusiasm. “That would be great.”

  The minute we got outside, Amber produced a pair of designer sunglasses and perched them on her divine little nose, which only made her look more depressingly perfect than ever.

  A wave of panic washed over me. Amber and I were alone together, like I’d wanted. But I still couldn’t think of a thing to say.

  I mean, plenty of stuff wafted into my mind, but when I imagined actually saying any of it out loud to Amber, it seemed so babyish somehow. So there was this squirmingly long silence, and I completely didn’t know what to do. Silences don’t crop up that often when I’m with my sleepover mates. I mean, Frankie even talks in her sleep!

  At last, to break the ice, I blurted, “We’re going to Frankie’s house. I told the others to meet us there.”

  Amber made a neutral American “Uhuh” noise and kept on walking.

  I was going hot and cold by this time. I had to say something!

  “I thought Frankie’s was the safest bet,” I explained. “I’m honestly not being horrible. But you never know what state Lyndz’s house is going to be in. Her dad’s always doing these major renovations. One time they couldn’t find the telly for like, days!”

  “Really,” drawled Amber, making it rhyme with “silly”.

  “It’s just the same at Rosie’s,” I gushed. “But for a completely different reason. Her mum and dad bought this whacking great house that needed masses doing to it. But then her dad walked out on them. They’ve done loads of improvements since then, but Rosie still worries that people will think she lives in a real tip.”

  You really despise me now, don’t you? You’re thinking, was Fliss out of her fluffy pink mind? Slanging off her best friends to some girl she’d only just met? And I totally don’t blame you. All I can say is I TRULY didn’t mean to.

  I just wanted Amber to know how incredibly, well – interesting all my mates were. Only for some reason it came out sounding like they all came from problem families or something!

  “We could have gone to Kenny’s house, I suppose,” I wittered desperately. “But then we’d have had to put up with her sister, Molly, poking her nose in all the time. Also Kenny has this rat.”

  Amber crinkled her nose. “Ugh,” she said faintly. “Shouldn’t they put down poison or something?”

  I burst into fits of girly giggles. “Oh, I didn’t mean they have, like – RATS. It’s a pet. Kenny keeps it in the garage.”

  “But still,” said Amber. “A rodent!”

  To my relief, I saw that we were nearly at Frankie’s house.

  “You’re going to love Frankie,” I gushed. “She’s SO much fun. Being with her is just one long party.”

  You probably won’t believe this, but it turned out that my horrendous walk with Amber was actually the good part!

  As Amber and I went upstairs to Frankie’s room, I could hear all my mates merrily slanging off the M&Ms like normal.

  “They SO think they’re the centre of the universe,” Lyndz was saying. And Kenny chortled. “Not!”

  Then we opened the door, and everyone looked up, and there was this like, ELECTRIC moment. I could practically see their thought bubbles. “Eeek! What do we say to this perfect person!”

  This time Amber showed us all up. She stuck out her hand, and said, “Oh, hi!” with that killing American politeness.

  I hastily introduced everyone. And Amber looked Rosie right in the eye, and said (eek! it gives me goosebumps just thinking of it!), “So you’re Rosie. Gee, that’s too bad about your dad.”

  Rose gave me this murderous look. Luckily, before she could give me a piece of her mind, good ole Frankie went into her Famous Actress routine.

  “So Amber,” she gushed. “What’s it actually like living in LA?”

  Amber’s eyes lit up. “You guys can NOT imagine. It’s SO fabulous.”

  It was like Frankie had turned some magic key. Amber totally sprang to life, telling us about her huge house, the stars she’d met, the parties she went to, the soap she’d just auditioned for – oh yes, and her FABULOUS boyfriend Darryl.

  Now and then one of the others opened their mouths to say something, but now Amber had started, she just went on and on. The rest of us just gradually glazed over. Afterwards Kenny said that if Amber had said “fabulous” one more time, she’d have been forced to bang her head on the floor. Her own head, Kenny meant. Personally I’d have settled for putting a large paper bag over Amber’s.

  It’s quite funny really. On the way home, things were completely reversed. Amber was still in “fabulous” chat-show mode, and I hardly said a dicky bird!

  When we got in, I immediately went in search of Mum. I was in serious need of a girly talk, I can tell you.

  I started up the stairs. Andy must have heard me, because he popped his head out of the kitchen. “I wouldn’t disturb your mum just yet, Fliss,” he said. He had that weird, tense expression I’d noticed earlier, when I was winding him up about coming home especially to see Jilly.

  “I can go to the loo, can’t I?” I moaned. “Amber’s in the other one.”

  Well it wasn’t an actual lie. I did go to the bathroom first.

  Then I stopped outside Mum’s bedroom door and hung about for a couple of seconds. I could hear them talking in whispers. Then I heard these muffled choking sounds.

  Someone was crying. I think I’m a bit psychic, because right away I just knew that the person doing the crying wasn’t Jilly. It was my mum.

  I went into a complete panic. I tapped on the door, and without waiting for an answer, I went in. “Mum?” I said anxiously. “Is everything OK?”

  Mum had obviously been crying on Jilly’s shoulder. She looked up with angry pink-rimmed eyes. “Will you please go away, Fliss,” she snivelled. “I really can’t cope with any extra hassle today.”

  I was so hurt, I gave this little gasp.

  Then I shut the door and went straight to my bedroom. And even though it was still light, I put on my night things, drew my bedroom curtains and climbed into bed, because you know what?

  I couldn’t cope with any extra hassle either.

  The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes next morning was a beautiful golden-haired girl, fast asleep in my spare bed.

  Yuk! I thought. I’ve been sharing my oxygen with Awful Amber!

  It�
��s amazing what a difference twenty-four hours can make. Yesterday I’d been so sure Amber would turn out to be my dream best friend. I’d even wished it was the holidays, so we could spend more time together. Now it was like I couldn’t get away from her fast enough.

  I scowled down at her, like a grouchy bear who just found Goldilocks. Can you believe Amber looks perfect in her sleep? She doesn’t even dribble!

  I got washed and dressed and went downstairs. I was SO dreading facing Mum. I could only think of one thing which would make someone sob her heart out, five days before her wedding day.

  Either Mum or Andy must have decided that getting married was a big mistake. But for some strange reason, they hadn’t got around to informing me.

  Suddenly I pictured those pretty peachy dresses hanging up in Mum’s bedroom. Promise you won’t laugh, but in my mind’s eye they were drooping. I got this huge lump in my throat. My parents’ marriage was over before it had even begun.

  But when I went into the kitchen, I felt totally confused.

  Mum and Andy were in there having a SERIOUS cuddle!! As soon as they saw me, they sprang apart, and I saw Mum had been crying again.

  She quickly wiped her eyes. “Fliss, love,” she said. “Whatever happened last night? Andy came up to ask if you wanted to go with him to get a takeaway, and you were fast asleep.”

  “Oh, yeah,” I said in a casual kind of voice. “I had this headache.”

  But I was having major pangs of jealousy. Our family only has takeaways like, once a year. But we always get them from the same place – a restaurant called Bamboo, and it’s THE best Chinese food, this side of heaven.

  Andy sighed. “I’d better go to work.” He gave Mum a soul-searching look. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay home, Nikky?”

  “No, I’ll be fine, love,” she said. And another long look passed between them, like they were talking in a code only they understood.

  My heart gave a little flutter. They’ve kissed and made up, I told myself. They had a tiff, that’s all. Now everything’s cool and groovy again.

  And for like five seconds, the five peachy little dresses perked up.

  But deep down, my days as an ostrich were strictly numbered. Because if everything was so hunky-dory, why did both my parents still look worried to death?

  As Andy went out, Callum came in, yawning. “I stayed up REALLY late,” he boasted. “And I had Chinese food. YOU didn’t, ha ha!” Boys just love to put the boot in, don’t they?

  “Great,” I said drearily.

  Callum rubbed his tummy. “Amber let me have her last spring roll,” he added. And he swaggered off with his cereal to watch breakfast TV.

  Mum grinned. “Callum thinks Amber’s great. He actually fell asleep against her shoulder last night.”

  “Oh, really,” I said, in what I hoped was a non-committal voice.

  But inside Grouchy Bear was yelling, “Keep your hands off my brother, Goldilocks! He’s mine!”

  Mum poured me some juice. She kept darting anxious looks at me. “Don’t worry. I’ll keep Amber entertained while you’re at school,” she said brightly. “I thought I’d take her and Jilly to Bradgate Park.”

  “Mmnn,” I mumbled.

  Mum darted another look from under her lashes. “Erm, Fliss,” she said. “About yesterday, when you came in?”

  I didn’t know what to say, so I had a tiny sip of juice.

  Mum laughed. “I think everything just suddenly got on top of me.” She was smiling, but her voice had a definite wobble in it.

  “Mum, is everything OK?” I blurted out. “I mean you still love Andy, right?”

  Mum gasped. “What EVER made you say that, you funny girl?” she asked.

  I replayed that moment over and over, all the way to school. What EVER made you say that? What EVER made you say that? Each time, I got the same result.

  Captured on my mental video tape, Mum looked and sounded genuinely shocked at my question.

  As I saw it, there were three possibilities.

  Either:

  1) I REALLY had nothing to worry about.

  2) My mum should definitely be put up for Actress of the Year.

  Or:

  3) My mum was shocked because I’d finally twigged something was wrong.

  In other words, the whole situation was still about as clear as mud.

  I decided not to tell my friends about my latest worry. It seemed like I was always crying on their shoulders these days. Plus, the Mum and Andy worry was kind of private.

  “Hi!” I said brightly, as we all met up at the school gate. “Mum says are you all still on for after school?”

  They looked at me as if I was speaking Martian.

  “We’re going to Leicester, remember? Shopping, then a serious pig-out at Pizza Hut!”

  For some reason my friends seemed uncomfortable.

  “I’d love to,” said Lyndz. “But I’ve got this stupid thing I have to do.”

  “Me too,” said Frankie. “Not the same thing,” she added hastily. “A different stupid thing, that I totally forgot about.”

  Rose had gone red. “I can’t come, either.”

  Honestly, I felt embarrassed for them. I glared at Kenny. “What about you? Have you got a stupid thing you just remembered you forgot?”

  Kenny shook her head. “Uh-uh. The fact is, I don’t think I’d enjoy Amber’s kind of shopping. Plus, I totally wouldn’t enjoy her company!”

  I stared at them. “But you said you’d love to come!”

  “We hadn’t met Miss Fabulous then,” Kenny pointed out.

  “But then it’ll just be me and Amber,” I said. The thought made me break into a cold sweat.

  My friends looked sheepish.

  “It’s just a shopping trip,” I pleaded. “You don’t have to marry her. You don’t even have to talk to her if you don’t want.”

  “No,” said Lyndz unhappily. “But we’d have to listen to her.”

  Frankie put her arm around me. “It’s not personal.”

  “Yeah, right,” I said gloomily.

  “Just tell your mum you won’t go,” said Kenny. “That’s what I’d do.”

  I shook my head. “I can’t.”

  “Why not?” everyone said at once.

  “Then she’d guess me and Amber don’t hit it off.”

  “So what?” said Kenny. “There’s no LAW which says you’ve got to be buddies with your mum’s friend’s daughter!”

  “It would hurt Mum’s feelings,” I said.

  Kenny rolled her eyes. “Fliss, you are such a lightweight.”

  I clamped my lips together and counted to ten. You don’t know you’re born, Laura McKenzie, I thought darkly. You have NO idea what I’m going through.

  I think Rosie did, though. She said softly, “Probably Fliss thinks her mum has got enough stress with the wedding and everything.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “I do actually.”

  “So how’s it going with those four somethings?” Lyndz asked, to change the subject. Then the whistle went and it was time to go into school.

  As the day went on, I got more and more depressed. Then on the way home, I had another one of my psychic flashes. This trip was bad news, I just KNEW it.

  The instant I stepped inside the house, I heard Amber in full flow. “Nikky, I had the best time today. That olde worlde house had such an awesome atmosphere! Gosh, I just came out in goosebumps all over!”

  I was in the living room by this time, but no-one noticed me for ages. Mum and Jilly were too busy listening to Amber gushing on about Lady Jane’s awesome house, until I thought I’d totally throw up!!

  I went to give Mum a hug. “Mum,” I hissed in her ear. “I’m really tired. Mrs Weaver made us work incredibly hard today. Maybe you should go to Leicester without me.”

  Mum laughed. “You’ll feel better once you get out of those school clothes! I’ll give you ten minutes to get changed, then we’ll go.” She beamed at Amber. “Once that girl hits the shop
s, she just shops till she drops.”

  Amber went into fits of laughter. “Gosh that is SO spooky! Are you sure Felicity and I aren’t long-lost twins?”

  I looked up in surprise. But it was my mum that Amber was merrily bonding with, not me.

  Poor old Callum was looking glum. Patsy had offered to babysit, and I think he was terrified she’d be cooking his tea!

  “I’ll bring you back a treat,” I told him.

  “Fizz Bombs,” he said at once. “‘They blast your buds’. Two packets. No, THREE!”

  “Get out fast, before he demands a plane to Cuba,” Jilly giggled.

  But my brother flung his arms round me, giving me one of his desperate cling-on hugs. Mum had to peel him off me like Velcro. We closed the door on frantic yells of “It’s not fair! It’s not fair!”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t meet your friends, Fliss,” said Jilly, as we drove out of the village. “Amber’s been telling me all about them.”

  I bet she has, I thought.

  Amber was staring out of the window, so I took the opportunity to pull a horrible face. It sounds babyish, but it made me feel a very tiny bit better!

  Mum and Jill were nattering about all these people they used to know, back in the days before I was born. People with nicknames like Buzz and Miggsy, so you couldn’t tell if they were male or female.

  “You’re very quiet in the back, girls,” Mum said suddenly.

  “Uhuh,” we both mumbled.

  “Not feeling sick are you, Fliss? My daughter suffers from dreadful travel sickness,” Mum announced to the world.

  Amber rolled her eyes. “Great,” she muttered.

  “I’m fine,” I said stonily. “Don’t you worry your head about me.”

  There was another long silence.

  “I don’t know what you girls want to do,” Mum said at last. “But I’ve got to find the perfect going-away dress, for after the wedding.”