Libriomancer: (Magic Ex Libris Book 1)
Page 32
I surveyed my home and grimaced. Aside from nailing sheets of plywood over the broken back door, I had done nothing at all to clean up. Nor was I much better off: my clothes were rumpled, stubble covered my chin and cheeks, and my hair was a bed-flattened disaster.
Doctor Shah didn’t look so great either. Her eyes were shadowed, and she acted jumpy, glancing about as she approached like she was waiting for something to leap out at her. Given her time in captivity, I couldn’t blame her. How did a therapist cope with that kind of trauma?
I took a moment to compose myself, trying to keep my own conflicting feelings from showing, then opened the door.
“Isaac!” Lena bounded up the steps to hug me. “Congratulations on your promotion!”
“Thanks.”
She pulled back, and her brow furrowed. “Have you eaten anything today?”
“Raisin Bran. I think.” Had I actually finished that bowl, or was it still sitting in my office? “I’ve been busy with the new job.” I stepped to the side. “I haven’t had time to straighten up around here. Sorry.”
Lena pulled a box of Hot Tamale candies from her pocket. “I brought something for Smudge. Do you mind?”
I gestured for her to go ahead, and she hurried back to my office. I shook Doctor Shah’s hand and shut the door behind her. “I’m glad you’re all right.” I hesitated. “Are you? All right, I mean?”
“I’ve had better months, but I’m getting there. I met with Margaret Hubert yesterday. Her son’s magic was crude, like an ax through her memories, but I think the Porters should be able to help her.”
Lena returned and opened the fridge. “You haven’t even been shopping yet?”
Doctor Shah rolled her eyes. I couldn’t tell if her expression was one of fondness or exasperation. Probably both.
“If I’d known you were coming, I would have stocked up on ice cream,” I said.
“Well, make sure you remember next time.”
Next time? “I’m sorry I forgot to call you about the motorcycle.”
“I’m not here about the bike.” Lena gave up on my fridge and sat down at the table, where she tossed back a few candies.
When she didn’t say anything more, I turned back to Shah. “Do you want a beer?”
Her face eased into a genuine smile. “Oh, God, yes.”
I grabbed two from the fridge, one for each of us. I took a long drink, then asked, “Did Gutenberg send you to check up on me?”
“Gutenberg has nothing to do with this visit,” Lena assured me.
“In part, I wanted the chance to say thank you,” said Doctor Shah. “For helping Lena, and for freeing me.”
“I couldn’t have done it myself.” I gave Lena a quick salute with the bottle. “She’s a better field agent than I ever was.”
“Says the man who took out four automatons,” Lena shot back.
“There’s more.” Doctor Shah stared at her bottle. “You know why Lena first sought you out.”
“Sure.” I kept my voice as neutral as I could. “She was afraid you had been killed or turned, and she needed . . .”
“I needed you,” Lena said bluntly. “Especially after the death of my tree.”
I tried not to think about the branch she had grafted onto the oak out back. “Until we could reunite you and Doctor Shah.”
“Please call me Nidhi.” She forced another smile. “I think we’re well beyond titles at this point, don’t you?”
“Nidhi and I were talking about Gutenberg,” Lena said. “We had what you might call a professional disagreement.”
“Lena believes Gutenberg has narcissistic personality disorder, and may in fact be a sociopath,” Nidhi said calmly. “Whereas I believe the DSM-IV wasn’t written to diagnose six-hundred-year-old sorcerers.”
I stared. “You’re asking me to settle a debate about mental disorders?”
“We fought.” Lena was arranging her remaining candies in a single meandering line.
“It happens. You’ve had a rough few days.” Nidhi was the therapist, not me. “People fight.”
“Not like this,” Lena said softly. “Not me.”
“Lena adapts to the personality of her lover.” Nidhi wiped condensation from the neck of her bottle. “After losing both me and her tree, Lena spent an entire week with you.”
My stomach did a somersault. “I don’t understand.”
“She loves you.” There were so many conflicting emotions in those three words I couldn’t begin to untangle them all.
“I . . . I know.” I winced as soon as I said it. Han Solo could say that and be awesome. I just felt like a dork. “But it was one week. She loves you more.”
“I’m right here,” Lena said, flicking a candy at me. “It’s not a competition. And I love you both.”
I could translate ancient texts in a half-dozen languages, but the more I tried to follow this conversation, the more lost I became.
“I’ve never been my own person. I never will be.” Lena spoke flatly, without resentment. “But fighting with my lover like that . . . it was something new. Something that happened because of you.”
“You’re blaming me for—”
“Shut up, Isaac.” Lena stood up. “I’m thanking you, dumbass.”
I looked at Nidhi, hoping she would throw me a lifeline, but she merely took another drink from her beer.
“You’re welcome?” I said weakly.
Lena ignored me, which was probably for the best. “With Frank Dearing, then with Nidhi . . . I didn’t know what I was or why my feelings changed until much later. I’ve never had a choice before.”
I thought she had made her choice the moment we found Nidhi alive in the Detroit nest. If not . . . the only reason to drive to Copper River to see me was . . . but then why would she bring Nidhi along? “Are you saying you need time to choose?”
Lena shook her head. “I’ve already made my choice.”
I waited. She folded her arms, grinning mischievously.
“Well?” I said.
“I choose you both.”
“I— What?”
Nidhi chuckled. “That’s pretty much what I said, too.”
“If you’re worried about the sex, don’t.” I could see the anxiety behind Lena’s smile. “I’ve got more than enough stamina to keep up with you both.”
“But not at once!” Nidhi said quickly.
Lena stuck out her tongue.
“You’re proposing that the three of us . . .” I trailed off, trying to find words.
“I know what I am,” Lena said firmly. “I love who I’ve been with Nidhi. If I leave her, if I stay with you, I’ll adapt to your needs and desires. But right at this moment I’m becoming something different. Something more, pulled in two directions at once. I’m conflicted. I want to keep that conflict, Isaac. I want to feel torn. When I’m with a single lover, then every choice I make comes back to what they want. Let me love you both, and some of those wants cancel out. It’s the closest I’ve ever come to truly choosing for myself. I want the conflict. And I want you.”
She glanced at Nidhi. “Just like I want you, too, so don’t you dare pout at me.”
My mind derailed at the idea of Doctor Shah pouting, but that was easier to process than what Lena was proposing. The logistics alone . . . they lived downstate. Were they expecting me to move to Dearborn? Or would Lena commute from the lower peninsula to the upper?
“And you’re okay with this?” I asked, stalling for time.
“It wouldn’t have been my first choice.” Nidhi sighed. “I don’t own her. She’s forced me to confront a lot of my own attitudes and assumptions these past two days. I don’t imagine it will be easy, but I’m willing to try, for her.”
“I’m not asking for promises,” Lena pressed. “I’m only asking for you—for us—to try.”
“The Porters have offered to reassign me to the U.P.,” said Nidhi. “They need someone working with the werewolf packs up here. I could keep up my mundane practice as well. S
easonal affective disorder alone will keep me busy most of the year. I’d get my own place, of course. I don’t imagine you and I would do well living in the same house.”
“Agreed,” I said. This wasn’t just about Lena; it was about the three of us. Nidhi Shah was a part of Lena’s life. A week ago, the idea of bringing Doctor Shah into my life would have been uncomfortable at best, but after seeing her the way Lena did . . . Okay, it was still uncomfortable. “I’ve never even managed a successful relationship with one person, let alone two. I don’t know how to—”
“Neither do I,” said Lena. “So we learn. What’s the matter? I thought you liked learning.”
Uncomfortable, but perhaps not unworkable.
“Stop overthinking this, Isaac,” said Lena.
“Overthinking is what I do.”
She took my hand. Her palm was damp and warm. “What do you want?”
Had she asked me a month ago, I would have answered without hesitating. I wanted to rejoin the Porters. I wanted a research position. I wanted magic.
I had those things now, and none of them had come in the way I expected. Why should this be any different? “I think—” My throat went dry. I took a quick drink. “I think I’d like to try.”
She laughed and hauled me out of my chair. Her arms clamped around my body, and her mouth found mine. I staggered back a step before catching my balance, then returned the kiss. Her lips parted, and for a short time I forgot about Nidhi Shah, about magical dangers bent on killing us all, about everything except Lena Greenwood’s body pressed against mine, holding me tight while our tongues danced together.
She broke away, beaming. While I caught my breath, she spun around and yanked Nidhi to her feet. Lena proceeded to kiss her with every bit as much enthusiasm as she had me.
Jealousy flared, an instinctive ape-level response crying, Mine! I did my best to squash that response, but this arrangement was definitely going to take some getting used to. And if it was hard for me, what must it be like for Doctor Shah—for Nidhi—to suddenly find herself sharing her lover with a former client?
I waited for them to finish. “This presents a serious question.”
They both looked at me. “What’s that?” asked Lena.
“Whether to start you off with a Doctor Who marathon or dive straight into Firefly.”
Lena grinned and took us both by the hands. “We can discuss it over ice cream,” she proclaimed. “Or pie. Maybe both. Either way, we’re going to celebrate, my treat. And don’t worry about the calories. We’ll work that off later.”
I swapped a bemused look with Nidhi as Lena tugged us both toward the door. What else awaited us, I didn’t know . . . but there was magic out there, and I intended to explore it all.
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Bibliography
TITLES MARKED WITH an asterisk (*) were made up for this book.
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Hall, Jennifer. The Ancient Wisdom of Crystals.*
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McKinley, Robin. Beauty.
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Shaffer, Catherine H. Rabid.*
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The Finest in Fantasy from
JIM C. HINES:
MAGIC EX LIBRIS:
LIBRIOMANCER (Book One)
THE PRINCESS NOVELS:
THE STEPSISTER SCHEME (Book One)
THE MERMAID’S MADNESS (Book Two)
RED HOOD’S REVENGE (Book Three)
THE SNOW QUEEN’S SHADOW (Book Four)
THE LEGEND OF JIG DRAGONSLAYER:
GOBLIN QUEST (Book One)
GOBLIN HERO (Book Two)
GOBLIN WAR (Book Three)
Table of Contents
Also by Jim C. Hines
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Bibliography