Witch is How Things Had Changed (A Witch P.I. Mystery Book 25)

by Adele Abbott

  I was getting nowhere fast, so I found a quiet corner and made myself invisible.

  Fortunately, the door to the machine room was unlocked. Once I was inside, I had to try to figure out which set of machinery belonged to the lanes where Jack and the others had been playing. I was still trying to work it out when a huge crash made me almost jump out of my skin. It took me a few seconds to realise that it was the sound of a bowling ball hitting the pins. Although it had scared me to death, it proved to be very helpful because I remembered that the only lane in use was the one three down from where Jack had played.

  Having located the correct lane, I began to dig around. Jack had said the machinery at Wash Bowl was old, and he hadn’t been kidding. There was dust, grime and all manner of creepy crawlies back there. I was just beginning to think that my hunch had been wrong when I noticed that one of the small metal grilles was being held in place by only a single screw. I slid the grille to one side and poked my hand inside. It was even more gross in there, but then my fingers brushed against something. I had to practically dislocate my shoulder to get a grip on it, but I finally managed to pull it out.

  ***

  As arranged, the headmistress was waiting for me outside the Nomad girls’ dorm.

  “The others are inside, Jill.”

  “Felicity too?”

  “Yes, although I should warn you she’s a little tearful today. Have you seen that strange little creature of hers?”

  “Fluff? Yes, he’s awfully cute.”

  “That’s as maybe, but I’m afraid Felicity is going to have to release him at the end of the week. The school doesn’t allow unidentified creatures to be kept as pets.”

  “Shall we?” I held open the door.

  Seated around the table were Beth Nightling, Felicity Charming and three other girls I didn’t know. Felicity’s eyes were red from crying.

  “The floor is yours, Miss Gooder.” The headmistress took a seat at the head of the table.

  “Thank you, headmistress. Before I reveal who took the gold jewellery, I have some important news for Felicity. I’m pleased to report that I’ve managed to identify Fluff.”

  “Really, Miss?” Her eyes lit up.

  From my pocket, I produced the photocopy I’d taken of the page from Cuthbert Shuttlebug’s book. “Fluff is an aurochilla.” I pointed to the illustration.

  “Does that mean I can keep him, headmistress?” Felicity said.

  “I suppose so. That illustration does appear to be your little friend, so I see no reason why you can’t.”

  “Which brings me to the matter of the gold jewellery that has gone missing.” I walked over to Fluff’s cage and carried it across to the table.

  Everyone, including the headmistress, looked confused.

  “I brought this with me.” I took a small earring out of my pocket. “I lost the matching one years ago, but I didn’t throw it away because it’s gold.”

  They now looked even more confused.

  “Watch.” I put the earring through the bars of Fluff’s cage.

  The cute little creature grabbed it, stuffed it into his mouth and began to eat it. A few moments later, it had gone, and he gave a tiny burp.

  “The aurochilla are friendly creatures. They’re very rare—almost extinct, in fact. One peculiarity about them is that, as well as their normal diet of fruit and veg, they enjoy nothing better than eating gold.”

  Everyone looked stunned; no one more so than the headmistress. “How can a little thing like that manage to chew its way through gold?”

  “According to Cuthbert Shuttlebug’s notes, the aurochilla has a second set of incredibly strong teeth, which are hidden most of the time. It uses them to bite and chew gold.”

  “Fluff ate my ring?” Beth looked gobsmacked.

  “And my bracelet?” said the girl who I now realised must be Christine Ridings.

  “That’s right. What’s more, I believe he also ate the inter-house sports cup. Felicity has been having some problems with the catch on the cage. My guess is that Fluff managed to sneak out one night and had a really big feast on the trophy.”

  There was silence for the longest moment, but then the headmistress laughed out loud. “Well, blow me down. Whoever would have guessed? Still, I’d much rather it was this little creature than have a thief in our midst. I guess we’ll just have to find the funds from somewhere to buy a replacement cup.”

  “That may not be necessary, headmistress.” I turned to Felicity. “Could I have a quiet word?”

  “Of course, Miss.”

  I took her to one side and told her what I wanted her to do.

  She nodded, giggled and then picked up Fluff’s cage.

  “Would you come with us, please, headmistress?” I said.

  Ms Nightowl looked very puzzled but followed as Felicity led the way out of the building.

  “I usually take him over there.” She pointed to a small copse in the distance, close to the perimeter wall.

  “Lead the way.”

  The three of us made our way across the playing fields, which had already been marked out in preparation for Friday’s sports day. When we reached the copse, Felicity stopped and looked at me.

  “It’s okay.” I nodded. “Let him out.”

  She placed the cage on the ground, pulled the catch, and opened the door. Fluff didn’t need any further invitation. He skipped out of the cage and scuttled into the trees.

  We followed at a distance until we saw him stop.

  “Wait here a minute,” I said.

  When he turned around and came back, Felicity put him in the cage, then I led the way to the spot where he’d halted for a while.

  “Look!” I pointed.

  “Is that what I think it is?” The headmistress pulled a face.

  “Yes, it is. It’s solid gold poo. I’m pretty sure there’ll be lots more of it around here. It may not look very pretty, but once it’s been cleaned up, it should still retain much of its value. If you collect it, there should be more than enough to pay for a new trophy.”

  “I’ll get Reginald Crowe straight on it.”

  Poor old Reggie.

  “Miss,” Felicity said. “I don’t think I want to keep Fluff.”

  “Why not? It’s okay now we’ve identified him. You’ll just have to keep him away from the gold.”

  “I was thinking about what you said about them being almost extinct. He probably has a family or friends back at the Valley of Shadows. I’d like to take him back there and set him free.”

  “That’s a very selfless thing to do. What do you think, headmistress? Could that be arranged?”

  “Absolutely. I’ll get straight onto it as soon as I get back to my office.”

  “Great. I suppose I’d better get back to Candlefield, then.”

  “Before you go, Jill. I’d like to ask your permission to name the replacement inter-house sports trophy, the Gooder Cup.”

  “I’m very flattered, but that really isn’t necessary. Anyway, my name won’t be Gooder after Saturday.”

  “All the more reason to give your current name to the cup. It will act as a permanent reminder of when Candlefield’s most powerful witch first taught at our school. What do you say?”

  “I—err—guess so. Thank you very much.”

  “Excellent. In that case, you really must be here on Friday to present it to the victorious house.”

  “But, headmistress, I—”

  “I realise you get married the next day, and will have a lot on your mind, but if you could just see your way clear to being here for the final event of the day: The final of the mixed four-hundred metres relay. You could present the trophy immediately after that race, and then shoot off home. What do you say?”

  “Please say yes, Miss,” Felicity said.

  “How can I say no? I’ll be here.”

  Chapter 17

  It had been ages since I’d had breakfast at Aunt Lucy’s, but then, yesterday, when I’d just happened to mention that Ja
ck would have to go into work early today, she’d suggested I should join her this morning.

  What? No, of course I hadn’t been angling for an invitation. What kind of person would do that? Sheesh!

  “Morning, Jill.” Aunt Lucy was in the lounge, cradling one of the Lils in her arms.

  “Morning. Which one is that?”

  “Lil One.” She hesitated. “Oh dear. I really shouldn’t call her that, but it’s the only way I can keep track of them. This is Amber’s Lil.”

  “Lil One and Lil Two?” I like it. “I’m not sure Pearl would be very happy to know her little darling is number two, though.”

  “She’d be mortified, even if I tried to explain it doesn’t mean anything. You won’t tell either of them, will you?”

  “Of course not. Your secret is safe with me.”

  “Take her, Jill, would you?” She handed Lil One to me. “Watch her while I see to breakfast.”

  “Me? I don’t know how.”

  “You’ll be fine. I won’t be long.”

  “Err—okay.”

  Lil One seemed to be giving me a puzzled look. She could probably sense that I didn’t have the first clue about babies.

  “Goo, goo, goo,” I said.

  Lil One appeared to smile, so I was obviously on the right track. This looking after babies was a piece of cake.

  “Goo, goo, goo.”

  She suddenly began to wail.

  Oh no! What had I done?

  “Aunt Lucy! Help!”

  Moments later, she appeared at the door. “Did you call?”

  “I think I’ve done something wrong. Lil One’s crying.”

  “That’s what babies do.” Aunt Lucy smiled. “It’s nothing to worry about. Just rock her in your arms and talk to her.”

  “I was talking to her. I said, ‘goo, goo, goo’, but that just made her cry.”

  “Try talking to her properly—just like you would to anyone else.”

  “But she’s just a baby. What shall I talk to her about?”

  “Tell her about the wedding.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Why not? I’d better get back and see to the bacon.”

  “Hey, Lil, I’m getting married on Saturday. To Jack. You don’t know him, but I think you’d like him.”

  To my amazement, Lil One stopped crying.

  “I’ve got a lovely dress, and we’re going to have a big cake. There’s going to be lots of—”

  I stopped because Lil One was fast asleep.

  When Aunt Lucy returned, I whispered, “I think she must have been bored by all the wedding talk.”

  “She’s due a nap. Pass her to me, and I’ll put her down in the bedroom.”

  No one did a fry-up like Aunt Lucy.

  “Will Lil be okay in there by herself?” I said.

  “She’ll be fine. If she stirs, I’ll hear her on that.” She pointed to the small intercom.

  “I’ve never been very good with babies,” I said.

  “Neither were the twins until the Lils came along. You’ll be fine too when your turn comes, and you’ll always have me to babysit.”

  “Thanks, but by that time, the Lils will probably be old enough to babysit for me.”

  “We’ll see. It might happen sooner than you think. Oh, by the way, the twins came over the other night. They said that if I needed to use magic to amuse the Lils, they wouldn’t have any objections. I’m not sure what prompted that sudden change of heart.”

  “Me neither.” I grinned.

  “You know something about it, don’t you?”

  “I might, but I’m sworn to secrecy.”

  “Go on. You can tell me.”

  “Okay, seeing as how you’ve twisted my arm. When I went to Pearl’s house on Monday, the twins had used magic to get the soft toys to put on a show for the Lils. I told them that they had to own up, and let you know that you could do the same.”

  “The cheeky little madams! Just wait until I see them again.”

  Snigger.

  I soaked up the last of the tomato juice with a piece of fried bread, and then popped it into my mouth. “That was delicious, Aunt Lucy. Thanks very much.”

  “My pleasure. I don’t suppose I’ll see you again before the wedding.”

  “Probably not.”

  “I’m really looking forward to it. So is your grandmother.”

  “Really? I didn’t think she approved of me marrying a human.”

  “She likes to pretend that she doesn’t, but I can tell she’s thrilled for you both. She just hides it well.”

  “Extremely well. I suppose I’d better get going.”

  “Could you do me a favour, Jill?”

  “Of course.”

  “Amber left her purse here when she dropped Lil One off this morning. Is there any chance you could nip into Cuppy C and let her have it?”

  “No problem.”

  When I arrived at the tea room, Amber was just tearing a slip from the terminal. “Chicken nuggets and a chocolate milkshake.”

  “Coming up.” Mindy was standing next to the coffee machine.

  “Since when have you sold nuggets?” I said.

  “Chicken nuggets equals a latte.” Amber pointed to the slip. “And the chocolate milkshake is a strawberry cupcake.”

  “Say what?”

  “We’ve cross-referenced the items on the Burger Bay menu to the items on our menu. That way we can still use the self-order machines.”

  “Isn’t it all a bit confusing?”

  “It was at first, but we’ve just about got used to it now, haven’t we, Mindy?”

  “Yeah. Pretty much.”

  “So, you’re keeping the machines?”

  “We might as well, seeing as we’ve paid for them. Did you want a hotdog?”

  “What’s that?”

  “A blueberry muffin.”

  “No, thanks. I just popped in to bring you this. You left it at Aunt Lucy’s.”

  “Thanks. I’d forget my head if it was loose. How’s Lily?”

  “When did you start calling her Lily?”

  “William and I had a long talk last night. It’s silly that both babies are known by the same name. It might confuse them when they’re older, so we’ve decided that we’re going to start calling Lil by her full name: Lily.”

  “That makes sense.” Those are not words I often said to either of the twins. “Have you told Aunt Lucy?”

  “No. I forgot to mention it when I dropped her off this morning, but I will do when I pick her up tonight.”

  Just then, I spotted a newspaper that someone had left on one of the tables. It was the headline that caught my eye: Return of the Gold Gobbler.

  Amber noticed me reading the article. “Did you know about that?”

  “I did, but I’d really love to know how The Candle got hold of the story. The creature was only identified yesterday.”

  “Is it true that it eats and poos gold?”

  “Yeah, it does. It’s really cute though.”

  Once I was outside Cuppy C, I made a call to Desdemona Nightowl.

  “Have you seen The Candle, headmistress?”

  “I have.”

  “How did they get hold of the story so quickly?”

  “I don’t know, but I suppose any of the staff or pupils could have tipped them off.”

  “I thought I’d better warn you because there’s likely to be more press interest in this story.”

  “I’m way ahead of you, Jill. They’ll no doubt be over here in their droves later today. That’s why I’ve arranged for the little creature to be taken back to the Valley of Shadows immediately. By the time the press arrives on the airship, they’ll be too late.”

  ***

  I’d called Graham Hardy, and he’d said I could pay him another visit.

  We were in the lounge at his house.

  “Thanks for agreeing to see me again, Graham.”

  “No problem. I’m surprised you’re still working, though. Don’t you and Jack
get married on Saturday?”

  “We do, yes, but I’m hoping to wrap up a few loose ends before then.”

  “From what I hear, it isn’t looking good for Chris.”

  “He’s an innocent man, so he has nothing to worry about.” I glanced around. “Jack tells me you’ve won a lot of tournaments. I’m surprised you don’t have any trophies on display.”

  “They’re in the dining room. Would you like to see them?”

  “Yes, please.”

  He led the way into the next room where a large glass cabinet had pride of place on the far wall.

  “That’s quite a collection.” I feigned interest in the many cups.

  “Thanks. I like to think so.”

  “No North of England trophy, though?”

  “Not yet.”

  “I believe you’ve been runner-up to Bill Mellor for the last three years?”

  He nodded. “I’ve just had a run of bad luck.”

  “Was it really worth killing him, just so you could win this year?”

  His expression quickly changed to shock and then to anger.

  “What are you suggesting?”

  “I’m not suggesting anything. I’m saying you murdered Bill Mellor and framed Chris Jardine—all to give yourself a better chance of winning the North of England competition.”

  “That’s absolute nonsense. Chris killed Bill because he was seeing Sarah.”

  “Chris knew nothing about his wife’s affair.”

  “He would say that, wouldn’t he?” Hardy pointed to the door. “I’d like you to go now.”

  “You almost got away with it, but then you’d been planning this for quite some time, hadn’t you?”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about. If you don’t leave, I’ll—”

  “Do what? Call the police? Go ahead. It’ll save me the trouble of doing it.”

  “Chris poisoned Bill with a cigarette. The police have already confirmed that.”

  “But you and I know that isn’t true, don’t we, Graham? The poison that killed Bill got onto his fingers from the bowling ball, not from a cigarette.”

  I could tell by the look of terror in his eyes that he knew the game was up, so I continued, “I found the glove you wore when you put the poison into the fingerholes of Bill’s ball. As soon as he’d played his next shot, you took your imaginary phone call, made your excuses and left. No one noticed that you’d taken Bill’s ball instead of your own. Why would they? They’re identical. My guess is you went straight from the bowling alley to Bill’s house, where you dropped the cigarette butt that you’d coated in the same poison.”