The Ghost of You

by Tori Fox

  I explode over the shower wall, feeling guilty for getting off on the thought of her. I rinse off and grab her things, placing them in the bag of clothes she left behind. I find another bag and I can tell by the smell it’s her dirty clothes. I run them down to the basement and throw them in the wash.

  I make my way back upstairs, Brutus following close behind, and collapse onto my bed. Thoughts of Anna invade my brain and I know I won’t be able to concentrate if I try and study tonight. I lay down and think of anything but the girl next door.

  I roll over and hit snooze on my blaring alarm clock. I wish I could sleep a few more hours but I know that extra sleep will keep me up late. I try hard to be on as normal of a schedule as possible when I have my days off. But it’s not easy.

  When the alarm goes off again, I roll over and find Brutus lying next to me.

  Asshole.

  He knows he’s not supposed to sleep on my bed.

  I sit up and let my satin sheets fall off me. I grab my sweats from the floor and open my blinds. I figure it best Asheville doesn’t need to see my balls when I let the light in.

  I look down and see Anna pulling into her driveway. Her body immediately flashes through my mind making my dick stir. I need to leave her alone. I feel guilty about last night. I should have knocked on the bathroom door.

  I make my way downstairs and clean up the mess in my living room. God, she probably thought I am a slob. This house is a mess. I wish I had the energy to make it a home. But I don’t. Not since Claire.

  I walk into my half-finished kitchen and throw dishes in the sink and empty bottles and cans in the trash. I should work on this today. Maybe finish installing the new cabinets sitting wrapped in my basement. Maybe head out to the store and pick out countertops.

  I bought this house for the projects to keep my mind busy, keep my mind away from Claire. But every time I try to tackle a new project I ask myself if she would approve. My brothers would punch me if they knew. Hell, half the police department would do the same.

  But it’s hard. The last five years have been hard. I loved Claire more than anything in the world. I would be lying to myself if I said I don’t anymore. Our lives were perfect. We had the perfect wedding, the adorable three-bedroom house, ready to be filled with kids. I was happy. I was in love. I thought she was too.

  Until that day I came home and something felt off. I had already had a shit day. There was a terrible accident and I had to let two families know they would never be seeing their children again. I remember feeling numb after that. My partner and I went out for drinks. I never drink more than a beer when I go out but that day I drank five. I was devastated over the loss. It hit me so hard, thinking that one day one of my friends may do the same thing if my future children weren’t careful.

  My partner drove me home. I remember walking into my quiet house. I figured Claire was out with her friends. But noticed none of the lights were on. I was always giving her a hard time for leaving lights on when no one was home but she always did. I went into our bedroom and all my clothes were where I left them on the floor. She always picked them up. She was always cleaning up after me. Confused, I walked into the kitchen. The dishes were still sitting in the sink I had left in the morning, a pan sitting on the stove I never put away. Then I saw the note on the kitchen table.

  She was gone.

  She couldn’t be with me anymore.

  That was all it said.

  To this day I still beat myself up over drinking those five beers. Maybe if I had only had one she would have been packing her things when I walked in the door. I would have been able to convince her to stay. Maybe if I hadn’t been so hard on her for the lights. Maybe if I had been better about cleaning up after myself.

  I miss her despite the heartache she put me through.

  I open the drawer in the kitchen where I keep the picture of us from our wedding day. It’s the only one I have. The rest are in storage, packed up and hidden from me by my brothers and parents.

  I lean over the counter, my head resting on my forearms. My chest aches at the loss. Of not knowing where she is. Not knowing if she thought she made a mistake. It hurts more to think she moved on. That she found a man who could make her happier than I did.

  I need a distraction.

  I look out my kitchen window and see Anna dragging a huge ten-gallon jug of water across her lawn.

  I put the picture back in its hiding place. I take a deep breath in and out. Foregoing the ghost of Claire.

  I pick my tools up off the floor of the kitchen and move them to the front door. I run upstairs and change, my mind fighting me, begging for a distraction to keep the disheartening thoughts of my ex-wife from beating me down again. Burying my hardened heart deeper into the box I locked it up in.

  I walk out the door with tools in hand, hoping Anna will let me in. She is the distraction I need.

  I knock on her door. I hear a shuffling in the background and then the click of the lock being turned. Before I can even say a word, her hazel eyes go big, her cheeks turn red, and she slams the door in my face.

  Yep, she is still embarrassed.

  I knock again. “Come on Anna, open up. I’m here to apologize.”

  Through the door she talks to me. “No way. Not a chance. I think it’s best we never see each other again.”

  “But it’s okay to talk to me through the door?”

  “No, that’s not okay either. No more talking to each other.”

  “Alright then, I guess I’ll just back away.”

  “Good, you do that. Farther. But watch out for the step,” she says as I slowly walk backward.

  I smirk at that. “If we can’t see each other, maybe you should stop looking at me through the peephole.”

  “I’m not,” she yells, only making my smile bigger.

  “Is that so? Well you should stop talking to me too since you said we can’t talk to each other either.”

  “You are the one that keeps talking!”

  I shake my head because I know she is watching me. “No, I am just responding to you.”

  “Ughh, you are so frustrating!”

  “Then open the door, Anna. I come in peace. As an apology for walking in on you last night, I thought I would try and fix your shower.”

  “It’s not broken.”

  “Is that right? Then why did I see you pulling a giant-ass jug of water across your lawn ten minutes ago?”

  I hear her humph through the door. “Are you spying on me?”

  “Nah. Just happened to look out my window when it happened. Now open the damn door so I can help you.”

  The door rips open faster than I thought. Anna stands in the doorway, arms crossed, pushing her ample breasts up, her cleavage spilling over her tank. “You are so demanding. I don’t even want to deal with you. So just try and fix the damn shower. I need a nap before I head into my other job. Try not to make too much noise.”

  With that, she turns around and storms into her house, leaving the door wide open for me.

  Well, I guess I got my distraction.

  She slams the door to her bedroom and I can’t help but chuckle. I walk into her bathroom and set my tools down. I look under the sink for towels and can’t find any. I check the hall to see if there is a linen closet, but all I can find is a coat closet.

  I knock on her door. I don’t want to bother her because I know she wants to nap but I also know how worked up she was and there is no way in hell she is asleep.

  “Go away.”

  I try the handle, not wanting to have another conversation through a door and find it’s unlocked.

  I walk into her room and she flies off the bed. She crosses the room within seconds, getting right in my face. She pushes against my chest to get me to leave but I stand my ground.

  “Get out!”

  I give her a smirk, knowing it will just piss her off more. “I kind of like your hands on me. Why would I get out?”

  That causes her cheeks to flush again. And I
like it. I wonder if I could get her to flush like that by doing other things to her body.

  The thought leaves me as she removes her hands from me and starts pacing. “You are infuriating!”

  “I just came in to ask for some towels,” I say, ignoring her comment.

  “Oh,” she responds and stops pacing.

  She grabs a step stool from the side of her dresser and opens a door to extra storage space above her closet. She grabs a few towels and I take them from her so she doesn’t fall off the step stool.

  “Sorry. I—ah, I didn’t think about that. Sorry for yelling.”

  “Don’t worry about it.” I nod toward her bed. “Take a nap. I’ll try to have this fixed in a few hours.”

  I walk out, shutting the door behind me.

  I head back into the bathroom and lay towels down on the floor in case there is any water left sitting in the pipes.

  I take it apart and discover more problems than I expected.

  I knock softly on Anna’s door to let her know the problem but she doesn’t answer. I open it slightly and see her face down in her pillow snoring softly. I shut the door and head into the kitchen. I look around for a piece of paper but can’t find any. I remember the last time I was here we walked through her back sunroom. If I recall correctly, there was a desk in there.

  I make my way to the sunroom and find a pad of paper. I rummage through her drawers and find a pen along with sheet music, some filled with notes, others blank, scraps of paper with words written on them and scratched out in messy handwriting, and guitar picks. I take the time to look around the room and notice three guitars and a keyboard. The walls are filled with records and other music memorabilia, the story of my neighbor becoming more of a mystery.

  I close the drawer, not wanting to pry too much. I know from my brother, music is personal, and a lot of musicians don’t want others hearing their music until they are ready.

  I write a note and push it under her bedroom door before heading out to the hardware store.

  When I get back, the house is still quiet. I peek into her room again and she is in the same position I last saw her in. I pick the note up off the floor and throw it in the trash before heading back to work.

  A few hours pass and I think I have everything fixed in her shower. I even bought her a new showerhead because the one she had was looking lime stained and old.

  I head out the back and make my way to the basement to turn the water back on.

  When I head back into her house, she is standing in front of me in tiny-ass cotton shorts, her tits nearly falling out of her tank top. She rubs her eyes and yawns.

  “How long was I asleep?”

  She clearly hasn’t looked in a mirror or else she would be embarrassed by the way she looks right now. “A few hours.”

  “I was so tired.” She yawns again and covers her mouth. “Sorry, I should have helped you.”

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  “I woke up to the pipes moaning. Did you get the water back on?”

  I nod. “I turned it on. Now is the moment of truth to see if it actually works.”

  She follows me into the bathroom. I grab a towel and hold it near the base of the showerhead where it’s connected to the wall just in case everything I did doesn’t work.

  I turn the nobs and after a few seconds a steady stream of water comes out of the showerhead. “Good as new. Hopefully. Let’s give it a few minutes to see if it flies off again.”

  “Okay,” she says and then turns to look in the mirror. “Oh my god!”

  She runs off and returns a few moments later, pulling an oversized sweatshirt over her head. “You could have told me I looked like I just woke from the grave.”

  “I liked looking at those nipples too much,” I joke.

  She rolls her eyes. “I just can’t with you.”

  She focuses her attention on the water. “You bought me a new showerhead?”

  “I had to pick up a few things to fix it, thought a new showerhead wouldn’t hurt.”

  “How much was everything? Let me grab some cash,” she says as she turns out of the bathroom.

  “Don’t worry about it,” I say and turn off the water, convinced everything is now in working order.

  “No way, Noah. You didn’t have to fix this.”

  “Meh. Now I know you won’t need my shower at three in the morning.”

  “It was one time,” she says, folding her arms across her chest.

  “One time I won’t forget,” I mutter.

  Her cheeks blush. “Can we just not talk about it? Pretend last night didn’t happen?”

  I purse my lips and look up at the ceiling. “Yeah, I don’t think I can forget about it.”

  “Well we aren’t talking about it again.” She ends the conversation by walking out of the bathroom and I follow her. She grabs her purse off the floor and hands me a few twenties. “This is all I have in here. How much more do I owe you?”

  I look down at the sixty bucks. I spent well over a hundred and fifty but I’ll take the hit as payment for the embarrassment. “That’s more than enough.”

  “Liar.” She sets her purse down and then sits on her couch. “Thank you though. I mean it. My landlord brushed me off. I have no idea when he would have gotten it fixed.”

  “Really?” I ask, taking a seat on a chair across from her. “That’s against your lease agreement, I would think.”

  She shrugs. “Well he told me yesterday he moved to Florida and is thinking of selling the place. That was his solution.”

  “Asshat. My brother’s a lawyer, he might be able to give you some legal advice. I mean he mostly handles criminal defense but he is smarter than he looks.”

  “Don’t tell me he was the one who grabbed my ass. He couldn’t be, right? He is only twenty-one?”

  I shake my head. “Nah, that’s my youngest brother Asher. Although he is in school for pre-law. My brother, Carson, is the lawyer.”

  She twirls a piece of red hair between her fingers. “How many brothers do you have?”

  “Five. And they are all assholes.”

  “They would have to be if they are related to you,” she says with a smile.

  “Touché. So do you play music? I noticed your sunroom has a lot of music memorabilia in it when I walked through it.”

  She bites her lip before answering. “More or less. I went to school for music. I like to mess around with it sometimes.”

  I don’t know how I knew but I could tell she was lying. There is no way someone has that many instruments or sheets of music unless they focused it on it deeply. “Well if you ever want to mess around with it, you should meet my other brother Mason. He’s in a band or two. I can never keep track. But he is in the process of opening his own studio.”

  At the word studio, she perks up. “Wow, really? That’s amazing. What does he want to do with it?”

  “Produce music. He wants to find up-and-coming bands and get them known. I’ve heard some of the music he’s mixed, it’s good. Not that I know much.” I point to my ear. “Untrained ear.”

  She smiles at that. “I would love to check it out. If you don’t think he would mind.”

  “Not at all. I’ll give you his number.”

  “Thanks. Well, I need to get changed for work.”

  I get up off the chair I am sitting on. “Let me clean up the bathroom so you can use it.”

  “Thanks again, Noah. I mean it. I could never have done this myself.”

  “No problem.”

  I head into the bathroom and make a few adjustments on the showerhead, clean up my tools, and wipe down any mess I made. I am about to walk out of the bathroom but run directly into Anna.

  Anna, who is dressed in a tight as fuck blue cop dress. She has knee-high leather boots on with lacy thigh-high tights. Garters poke out of the bottom of the dress holding up the tights. A belt accentuates her full hips and a pair of handcuffs dangle from them. What I could do with those handcuffs. I swallow as my eyes t
ravel back up her body. Her tits are spilling out of the top causing my dick to stir once again.

  “Oh my gosh, I thought you left.”

  I try to think about anything except those damn tits. Pizza, my grandma, the mess at my house, Brutus. None of it fucking works. I don’t know what it is about this girl but she turns me on more than any woman has since Claire.

  And there it is. The thought that turns my dick back to limp.

  “I was just grabbing my tools.”

  Her hands go up to the top of the dress. “Halloween. We have to wear a costume.”

  I raise a brow at that. Is it a coincidence she picked a cop and I’m a cop? Or is my head fucking with me?

  “The managers—ugh, they picked a theme. First responders.”

  I smirk. “And did you choose to be a cop?”

  She bites her lip and shakes her head. “Nope. Drew it out of a hat.”

  I’m beginning to think that lip biting is her tell for lying. But I’ll keep my mouth shut.

  “Well, have fun tonight. Careful when you bend over,” I say with a wink before heading out the front door. Not before looking back and watching her walk down the hall. Damn, that ass looks as good as her tits.

  7

  Anna

  Why do I embarrass myself so much in front of that man?

  I knew I should have checked that he was gone before I put on this damn costume.

  And I might have lied about the theme and picking a cop. But Seraphina kept giving me such a hard time over my sexy Elsa costume I was going to wear that she showed up to the yoga studio yesterday with this costume in hand.

  I could have not worn it but I feel sexy in it. Sexier than I have ever felt. And who cares if Noah saw me in it? I actually kind of like that he did. And I could tell by the way his eyes were glued to my body he liked it too.

  I need to get these thoughts out of my head. There is no way Noah, the hot, sexy, slightly broody cop would ever go for me. Even if he made some comments about the way I look. It’s better to not think about him. I don’t need a relationship. I crossed that bridge, found that bridge to not be steady and watched it collapse as I stood on it, bringing me down into the murky waters, and nearly drowning me in the process.